


That's What You Get (for letting your heart win)

by SophieRosina, thebeastinsideusall



Series: The Many Misadventures of Sophie and Mia [2]
Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: AU ZA, Alexandria Kinda, Alive!Shane Walsh, Dark Shane, Dark and Light, Dom/sub Undertones, F/M, Mentions of miscarriage, Multi, No Incest, Past Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Possessive Shane, Pregnancy, Revenge, Safe Sane and Consensual, Smut, Trauma Recovery, Twins, Unsafe Sex, badass females, but not graphic, trio relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-09-20 09:42:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 102,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9485504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophieRosina/pseuds/SophieRosina, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebeastinsideusall/pseuds/thebeastinsideusall
Summary: Rick left him for dead. Lori ruined him for love. The dead walk the earth. Shane gets it. But when a routine supply run brings two broken girls crashing into his orbit, his world gets flipped upside down and everything changes for the better.What was it everyone always loved to say... What goes around, comes around? Except this time, Shane wouldn't be the one karma bit in the ass. It would be the ones who'd fucked him over to start with that got theirs. It was only a matter of time. The twins would make sure of that.





	1. Let The Flames Begin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SophieRosina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SophieRosina/gifts).



> What do you get when you combine a random conversation about Shane, a mutual hatred of Lori, give or take five hours of back and forth, and a shit ton of emails?
> 
> Spoiler alert: you get this beast of a story!
> 
> Enjoy! xx

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He liked to think he’d learned his lesson, that he knew better than to care about others, because that only resulted in pain and suffering and a whole load of grief he didn’t need or want. And yet… he hesitated.
> 
> Or: how Shane Walsh met his girls for the very first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently, we're incapable or writing porn without suddenly getting the feels and needing to throw some backstory in...
> 
> *Throws it out into the world*

Shane Walsh was bored.

Months ago, when Rick had tried and spectacularly failed to kill him, Shane had stumbled his way through the woods to lick his wounds. He’d come across a tiny house hidden in the forest and taken it for his own. It wasn’t like the previous owner wouldn’t be needing the place anymore – son of a bitch had opted out and sprayed his brains all over the walls like a Jackson Pollock painting. Left behind a nice stash of supplies, though. So Shane had sewn himself up, and left the past where it belonged. Behind him.

At first his self-inflicted solitude had been a welcome reprieve from the constant nagging and whining and criticism of Rick’s camp, but after months of nothing for company he was bored half out of his fucking skull. Even killing walkers - which had become almost a sport to him - wasn’t hitting the spot.

So he’d gone for a drive in the Jeep Wrangler he’d acquired pretty early on in his solo venture, and come across an old gas station that was ripe for the picking. He pulled into the lot, ploughing through the two walkers that tried to get in his way. With an angry snarl, he climbed out of the vehicle and glowered at the rotten blood that had spewed across the hood. Always in the fucking way.

Three more of the stupid things were inside the station. They were slow and smelled disgusting, but dropped like flies beneath his knife. He felt no reason to ever waste ammo on the sons of bitches. It only attracted more of them. So why waste ammo that could be used on the living?

He searched the shelves while four more roamed at the back, behind the counter. There were plenty of bags of chips left for him to shove into his basket, and even the medical isle was left untouched. It was easy to figure out why - this was a tiny station in a two cop town. Far from the interstate and any known highway. Everyone most likely vanished once the bombs went off. It was empty. Forgotten.

The sign above the counter said 'cold beer', and as he looked over the shelves full of supplies he whispered a ' _fuck it_ ' out to the store, gaining the attention of only one of the walkers. He deserved a beer, dammit. So he stalked over, simply leaning over the counter once they came close enough and sinking his blade into their brains like butter. Bodies piled up like rotten sacks of potatoes. 

And as Shane walked around their bodies, his brow furrowed at the sight of the freezer door. It was latched, a strip of metal shoved through the lock loop instead of the standard padlock. That in itself wasn't really strange. Lots of places he'd found had walkers stuck inside like that.

What caught his attention was the fact that walkers only herded to one place if there was fresh food... blood. He looked closer... The strip of metal in the latch was dented a bit, like someone had tried to force open the door from the inside but couldn't. Shane closed his eyes and thought about just leaving, grabbing supplies and tucking tail. But what if someone needed help?

He liked to think he’d learned his lesson, that he knew better than to care about others, because that only resulted in pain and suffering and a whole load of grief he didn’t need or want. And yet… he hesitated. Worst case scenario, the freezer was full of more walkers he could slaughter, and what were another few bodies to add his already sky-high count? Not like he had anything better to do. Even if someone was inside, he didn’t have to stay any longer than it took to free them.

He approached the freezer door, knife clutched in his right hand as his left wrapped itself round the strip of metal holding the damn thing shut. It took two attempts to yank the metal free, and then Shane waited. Knocked at the door gently. Nothing came to throw itself at the door, so that ruled out walkers at least… He pulled it open, blinking into the semi-darkness as he waited for any sign of life to make its presence known. Still nothing.

He rolled his eyes. Reached for a beer on the shelf closest and popped the tab, ready to chug it down. He stepped back. Froze a moment later. Bulky body tensing.

“Nmm.”

He turned back to the freezer and pushed the door open a little further before stepping inside.

“Anyone in here?”

Once the door was fully open, he pushed over a case of Miller Lite over with his food to keep it that way. Light poured into the small freezer, throwing shadows and golden rays over a bundle of limbs and filthy clothes in the corner. His mind said already dead. His instincts said something different. 

There was no more sound at first, so he almost shrugged and moved away again. But then a twitch of a finger caught his eye. In an instant, his knife was at the ready, his stance prepared for walkers. Maybe whoever got locked in had slowly starved to death?

But then emerald eyes snapped open, barely visible beneath blood and dark, dirt-matted hair. Blinked once, twice, before there was the sound of bodies scrambling, pained groans and high pitched shrieks echoing through the freezer as hidden wounds were ripped open as flesh stretched and moved. 

"Get...a- Go away!" a scratchy voiced cried out, thin arms pushing back another body as the thing took a protective stance.

It took three seconds for Shane to assess the situation in front of him.

One… Both those _things_ were human females. Extremely emaciated. Shoulders jutting out from tight skin and cheek hollow and dark. Ripped, torn and blood covered clothes barely hid their bodies.

Two... He could see various cuts, gashes and bruises all over them. Purple and angry, maybe only a day or two old, possibly even three or four at the very most.

Three… There was blood flowing down one of their legs like a river as the girl tried to stand and push her green eyed companion behind her. They looked like the kind of victims you expected to see locked in a madman's basement.

"Get. The fuck. Away from us... I'll kill you." Each word was a breathless grunt or pained snarl from chapped and dry lips. Those icy glacier eyes glared at him so intensely, Shane almost, _almost_ , backed off.  

“Easy, girl… I ain’t gonna hurt ya.”

The blue-eyed woman swayed on the spot, held up only by the darker brunette behind her, who looked ready to collapse as well. Shane held his knife up where they could see, noting how they flinched back at the sight, then made a show of slowly tucking it into his belt.

“See. I ain’t here to do anythin’ to ya.” He took a cautious step forward. Then another. Hands held up in a placating gesture. Tried to seem less threatening.

The girls shuffled back until they hit the freezer wall, and it was then that Shane realized their feet were secured with ropes to one of the shelving units. But that wasn’t what made him nauseous, no. It was the spreader bars separating their ankles that got his attention – they weren’t there to restrict their movements so they couldn’t run away. They were to stop them from closing their legs.

“Jesus.” His breath fanned out and the girls flinched, pressing themselves against the corner and the metal shelving.

Shane had seen some pretty fucked up shit in his life, before and after the world went to Hell, but this… This was a whole new level of inhumanity.

“D-Don’t come any-… any cl-closer,” the green-eyed one stammered, eyes wide and terror filled, entire body trembling.

“Alright.” Shane put his hands up, tried to make himself seem smaller, less of a threat. He couldn’t leave them like that – he may have been an asshole, but he wasn’t a monster. “I just wanna help.”

“We don’t need your help.” Steel clashed with whiskey brown in defiance before rolling upwards as the girl slumped in the other’s arms.

“Mia!”

Shane moved on instinct, rushing those last few steps to clutch at the falling girl, his strong arms wrapping around her waist. He cringed at the hard feel of every rib and some of her spine. Emaciated was too kind a word to describe her.

But then shrieks of anger were directed at him, little fists slamming as hard as they could into his arms as he tried to lower the girl, _Mia_ , to the floor. 

"Easy!" He raised his arms up for a moment in defence before he saw an opening and grabbed the green eyed girl’s thin wrists. She let out a horrible sob and dropped like a sack of smashed bricks and sand, torso hovering over Mia as she hunched over trying to protect her unconscious companion. Her eyes stared up at him so pleading and desperate that his hard heart actually started to crack.

"Easy, darlin, I ain't gonna hurt ya."

He slowly released her wrists and she fell, only to shy away when he reached to help her, so he kept his hands in sight as she hovered over her friend. Her arms shook violently with the simple effort of holding herself up like she was. Matted hair fell in her face.

Dark eyes travelled over the nasty and most likely infected abrasions on their ankles. Those confinements had been on them a long, long time. And Shane was disgusted that even in the end of the world, where the dead walk the planet, there were still fuckers messed up enough to do this. 

"I ain't gonna hurt ya, but this might be uncomfortable gettin' them off, okay?"

She only stared at him in response, gaze flickering back to the others thighs where red still trickled down, lost in the already black and dried remains of older blood and dark bruises.

Shane's eyes closed for a second. They’d destroyed her, whoever she was. Both of them. They were a couple of broken dolls right now, quite literally.

“I’m gonna untie her first, alright?”

The woman shook her head violently and pushed at his hands where they hovered above the other’s feet. Her strength no more effective than the beat of a butterfly wing against his own bulk. Yet, he found himself relenting anyway.

"No! I won’t let you take her!”

Shane sighed. Remembered his training back in the academy, the specialist seminars about handling rape victims and assaults. The cases he'd worked on involving domestic abuse. Take it slow, keep it steady, and for God’s sake use your words.

“I ain’t taking her anywhere unless you say I can, but I can’t help her when she’s tied up like that.” He gestured to the spreader bar that pried their legs apart, constantly forcing them to remain open painfully wide. He'd wager they hadn't felt their thighs touch in a long ass while. "If I take these things off your ankles first, would that make you feel better?”

She considered it for a moment, eyes darting between him and the door. He could see the flight or fight in her eyes, flight wanting to win out. But she knew she wouldn't last five feet out that filthy glass door. Nor would she leave her companion.

“I wouldn’t go out there alone if I were you,” he warned. “Now, I ain’t gonna stop ya, but your friend, here? She’s in pretty bad shape. Botha ya are. You need medical treatment, and I can give it t’ya. But first I need you to promise me you won’t try and attack me the moment you’re free – you’ll only hurt yourself if you do.”

“She’s not my friend,” she replied, voice cracking and bottom lip trembling. "She’s my twin sister.”

Okay. Sisters. That's why she wouldn't let him touch the other one. 

"Okay, what's your name darlin?" Keep her talking, focused on the here and now.

"Sophie." 

Shane nodded, reached once more for the ropes. She let him close but he noticed she couldn't hold back the squeak of fear as his pinkie brushed the sole of her foot. As if one finger could hurt her. He looked her ankles over again, and on second thought, yeah, that fear was probably justified. 

"Okay, I'm gonna reach into my belt real slow and get my lock pick okay?" Sophie gave him a quick nod, her hands clutching to her sister’s unconscious body. They'd been ripped apart before, he realized. Separated from each other.

It only took few twists before the first cuff of the bar fell free with a metallic clang against the freezer floor. Shane glanced up in time to see a lone tear escape and drag down her filthy cheek. He had to keep her talking. Keep her calm. If she panicked, she’d probably end up harming herself.

"How long you been in here, Sophie?"

The other cuff released and she quickly yanked her thighs together and under her before moving to cradle her sister’s head in her lap, fingers brushing over the matted blood in her hair.

She shrugged and started rocking, just slightly, back and forth. Tears flowed, but they were slow, showing how badly dehydrated she was. Her cheeks were bruised and swollen.

"It's okay now."

Shane spoke to her softly. A strange concept to him. 

Those words open a flood gate and she sobbed outright, clutching Mia's shoulders to her abdomen. He let her cry and sob, gently picking the locks on the bar separating Mia’s legs and pushed them out of sight, under the metal shelving. He made quick work of untying the knots around both girl’s ankles. They weren't simply restrained – they’d been bound for torture. 

"Early summer, our group was killed and.. There used to be three more of us," she said quietly as she kept rocking. She raised a shaking hand and pointed to the other side of the freezer, but wouldn’t – couldn’t - raise her eyes to look in that direction.

There were bloodstains marring the floor. Ropes coiled in one corner. It told him all he needed to know.

“I never even knew their names,” Sophie whispered.

“Don’t think about them. You're alive. Your sister is alive," Shane said softly. “You gotta stay strong for her now, okay? If I pick her up, d’ya think you could stand?”

Sophie nodded, letting Shane ease her sister into his arms before clumsily pulling herself to her feet, refusing to use him as something solid to hold onto. She stumbled back into the wall, legs not used to taking her weight like that, but she kept herself upright and that was more than he’d expected her to be capable of.

Shane carefully stood up, shifting the girl in his arms so he wasn’t putting pressure on the worst of her injuries. Warmth trickled down the elbow that was under her knees, and he knew if he looked at it, it’d be stained with red.

She was so light, nothing more than skin and bones. Fragile like a new-born rabbit left out in the cold.

“You good to walk? I can always come back for-”

“I-I’m good,” Sophie said quickly. She almost fell forwards in her hurry to keep up when Shane stepped back, like she couldn’t bear to be more than a few inches away from her sister at any one moment.

Shane slowed his pace, wincing with every shuffled step Sophie forced herself to make. She was a determined little thing, refusing to stop even as her legs shook and her body swayed, weak from malnutrition and dehydration. He needed to get her to drink some water, and fast.

Slowly, step by agonised step, he got them out of the freezer. But when Sophie tried to lift her legs up more to step over the dead walkers, she stumbled again, barely keeping herself upright as she clung to his shirt and belt loops over his officer's belt. Shit. 

He shuffled Mia in his arms, but couldn't figure out how to carry them both without hurting their injuries. 

"Look, darlin’, my jeep’s just outside, okay? You stay right here. I'll be right back for you, I promise." 

"No! You can't take her!" Sophie clutched to his belt and side, looking like she was ready to hit him, but it only served to make her lose what little energy she had left and slump to her knees with exhaustion. Knees that were bruised purple and split open with gashes. He didn't want to think about how she got them.

"Here." He handed her the keys from his pocket. "I can't leave without those, right? You hold onto ‘em and I'll come back for you, yeah?"

Her fingers shook and she took the keys, little jingling sounds muffled as she clasped them in her hands like a lifeline. Wide, fearful eyes glanced over toward the girl in his arms, and Shane realized that if one of them died on his watch, the other wold try - and fail - to kill him. Or kill themselves. 

"There ya go. I'll be right back, okay? Right back."

He quickly moved through the store and headed outside, then gently placed the unconscious girl in the back seat. He covered her with a blanket from the floor before latching the door behind him. 

By the time he got back to Sophie she was passed pout, keys hanging limp in her hands. Shane sighed. They were so strung out and exhausted, he was surprised they’d even managed to stay awake as long as they had. Their bodies were shutting down, and for the first time, Shane feared his limited knowledge of medical training wouldn’t be enough. 

He crouched down beside her and gently slipped his arms underneath her body, fingers sticky with blood from wounds that never had the chance to heal before being split open again. No wonder they were so pale – they must have lost a lot of blood, Mia most of all. He pushed himself upright again, then reached down awkwardly to grab his basket of goods. He walked over to the counter to grab a couple of travel first aid kits. Something told him he’d probably need them.

He placed her in the front seat beside him and did up her seatbelt, sweeping her matted hair away from her neck so he could check her pulse. Weak, thready, but there. Just. He did the same for the other sister, noting how her skin felt clammy and hot to touch. Fuck and fuck again.

He barely remembered the drive back to the house, constantly shooting at glances at the two girls and praying that even though they looked dead to the world, they were still holding on. They’d made it this far - no way was he letting them die because he failed to get home in time.

As soon as he pulled up outside, Sophie started to stir, parched lips forming soundless words before her eyes shot open and she looked around frantically, disorientated and desperate for her sister. Hands weakly scratched at her seat belt.

“Shh, shh, shh…” Shane reached out for her wrist, but thought better of it. “Sophie. It’s okay. We’re here.”

She tensed up, but didn’t look so scared anymore, at least not of him.

“Here, drink some water.” He offered her a bottle and guided it to her lips, holding it steady for her when her own hands couldn’t. “Easy, darlin’, not too much… I know you’re thirsty, but you can’t drink it too fast or you’ll make yourself sick, okay?”

She tried to chug at least half the bottle despite his warning, but half of that slipped past her lips and threaded down her chin and throat. He tugged the bottle away from her weak grip and she whimpered softly in her throat. She instantly flinched at the sound. 

Mother of fuck. They were forced not to even make noises, too? Rage started to flow under his skin, but Shane kept calm. Capped the bottle and made his way to the other side of the door. Sophie was barely conscious, eyes fluttering and flickering about. She was scared and hurt and it terrified her more to be around a man. Shane knew that.

"Come on, sweetheart."

The moment he reached for her, she weakly smacked his hands away.

"Mia..."

Shane sighed but nodded, going instead to pick up the frail girl in the back seat and whispered a curse. The blanket around her legs was soaked through underneath and he wondered how the poor thing could have any blood left in her after that.

He hurried to take her inside and lay her on the bed, not caring about the blood on his sheets. He checked her pulse and was relieved to find it still there, if only just.

He went back out to the jeep and found Sophie passed out one again, but at least this time she had an empty bottle of water in her hands. Most of it had soaked onto her clothes and chest, but Shane wanted to smile in relief. She wanted to live.

Once both sisters were laid over the mattress, he unloaded the jeep and secured the door. Now it was time to stitch them up best he could. But honestly? He didn't know where to start. There were just so many wounds.

His instinct was to go to Mia, but if his suspicions were correct about the cause of her bleeding, there was nothing he could do but wait for it to stop. It was flowing heavily from between her thighs, but no stitches could prevent nature from taking its course and expelling what it had to. She was too weak and malnourished for that to have been viable. in the back of his mind, he knew she’d probably need stitches there for other reasons later, but that was too far out of his comfort zone to even dare thinking about.

He turned his attention to Sophie, easing her onto her front so he could cut away the scraps of fabric that still clung to her skin and expose the long, jagged wounds etched into her skin. He’d seen walkers less bloodied than her. There was scar tissue criss-crossed among fresher wounds, and it took him several minutes to clean the area enough to be able to see which ones needed stitches the most.

He threaded the needle, made quick work sewing the worst wounds shut and settled for using gauze pads soaked in disinfectant to patch up the others. Her arms and legs were littered with smaller cuts and bruises that he cleaned up as best he could, trying not to think about the horrors she must have experienced to get them. He dressed her in one of his spare shirts and a pair of shorts that were almost comically big on her tiny frame, deliberately not looking at the exposed skin even though she was too far gone to notice.

The fact she hadn’t flinched once told him more than he’d ever wanted to know. She was used to having pain inflicted on her while unconscious. Enough that she didn't even flinch at his heavy hand trying to sew her back together.

Mia had similar wounds on her body, and though they were fewer in number, they were just as horrific. Slashes across her hips and thighs… one long one down her forearm. Her nails were torn, just like Sophie’s. They’d put up one hell of a fight – some of their bruises were defensive ones, like they’d been determined not to give up even if it cost them their last breaths.

When he was done, he covered them with a blanket and placed a bottle of water and a packet of peanuts next to them on either side of the bed, ready for when they eventually woke.

As the hours passed, he stoked up a small fire. The cabin had a relatively large fireplace for the small size of the building, and Shane was grateful for it because it meant it heated every inch of the place when it got really cold. He watched as the flames flickered to and fro, dancing wildly over the wood placed there.

His heavy body slumped into a wooden dining chair, elbows on his knees as he waited for some sort of sound from his bedroom. Time would only tell if those girls survived. He couldn’t do anything more for now.

Winter was fast approaching, but from what Sophie had explained to him and the extent of marks he had seen, he knew ‘early summer’ to them was actually over a year ago, at the very least. Wounds that severely scarred weren't fresh from this season. They were old, most likely never stitched up at all. Their flesh was almost flayed off in some area. 

Shane was raging inside. He'd done a lot of questionable crap in his life. He was a bastard and an asshole at the best of times, and controlling and dominant at the worst, but this… This was the work of a monster. Someone - or multiple someone's - sick desire to hurt and hurt and hurt the young women in an attempt and forcing them into submission. 

But then his lips twitched in an almost prideful smirk. Over a year, and yet they still fought like feral cats protecting their young, or in this case sister. Ripping out their own nails as they scratched at anything in their path to help the other, even though they were bound and spread like a fucking pair of breeding heifers.

He’d gone back to the gas station quickly after setting their wounds to gather as much as he could before dusk settled. Went back inside that freezer, to find more than just spreader bars and rope hidden away. He almost snarled in rage at the thought of the things on the back metal shelves. Torture devices.

Whoever had done this had left in a hurry, leaving those two to die in the freezer like animals that were no longer wanted or useful. 

The girls deserved better than that.

Fucking hell.

A quiet whimper from the other room had Shane all but running in there, only to freeze halfway to the bed when Mia looked up at him with panicked but fierce eyes. She was too weak to sit up, but that didn’t stop her trying.

“You’re alright,” he said softly. Mia looked at her sister, reaching out to touch her, to check she was okay. “She’s alright, too. You’re safe now.”

Mia croaked out a bitter laugh, like she’d heard that so many times before and had it be a lie every time. It probably had been, but Shane meant it. He just had to prove it to her.

“I know you’re terrified. I can’t imagine what you've been through, but I promise… I won’t touch you. Not without your permission. I had to earlier, but Sophie was there - you can ask her when she wakes up.” Shane held his hands up, taking a few careful steps towards the bed. “I patched you both up best I could, but darlin’… you know what’s happening to you, right? Why you’re bleedin’ so bad?”

Mia eyed him warily as he came close enough to crouch by the bed. Flinched when he gestured to her stomach. Her hand came up over her abdomen, nails sinking into the flesh hard enough to nick the skin, like she wanted to scratch it out. 

“Yeah,” he realized. “You know.”

“Good riddance,” she uttered hoarsely. “Ain’t like that’s gonna stop you from-”

She coughed violently, the movement shaking her entire body. Shane reached for the bottle of water and uncapped it for her, careful to offer it in such a way that she could take it without having to touch him. She glared at him with such hatred in her eyes… like she was furious at him for trying to help. At herself, for needing it.

“I ain’t drinking that,” she said coldly. Her voice was so wrecked, her throat must have been burning something awful… and yet she still refused to take the bottle. “Not so you can just try to fuck my mouth the moment it’s all wet again.”

Jesus fucking Christ.

“Mia…” Sophie stirred beside them, reaching out to touch her sister’s hand. “It’s okay.”

“No.” Mia shook her head. Just a tiny movement. “He’s not doing this to us. I’d rather die.”

Sophie tried and tried and finally managed to get up onto her elbows, crawling a bit on her stomach so she could press her forehead to the other girl’s. A silent plea from one sister to the other. It wasn't hard to tell who the more dominant sister was in most situations. It was why she was the worst off – Mia had fought to protect Sophie with everything she had. 

"Mia, please… Look around." Sophie was begging. Begging her sister to actually take in where they were. Icy eyes flickered over the room. The wood log walls, the clean bedding, the mattress beneath them… the way she felt her flesh tighten against stitches… the look of pleading in her sister’s green eyes. 

Then over to Shane, whose dark whiskey orbs were open and filled with nothing but pity and sadness. There wasn't malice or lust in them, not even a glint of the eagerness to touch her and inflict pain that she had seen for so long now. 

She still didn't take the bottle from his hand, only glared at him more, angry at the pity in his eyes. She didn't want pity, and she didn't want water. She just wanted to die. 

"You lay one fucking finger on either of us and I'll rip your throat out with my teeth," she snarled, throat rasp. Shane could only nod. The threat in her eyes and voice was real - she wasn't bluffing

By the look of her canine teeth, she'd tried it before and probably succeeded.

“Mia, come on…” Sophie pleaded. “You need water. Just take it.”

So she did. She snatched the bottle from Shane’s hand and made herself take a few sips, not even able to relish in the sweet relief it granted before nausea rose in her stomach at the sudden presence of something finally filling it. She forced herself not to gag. Men seemed to like that, and she wouldn’t give him the pleasure of listening to her do it over some water.

Sophie ran a shaking hand over her sister’s back. She was intuitive when it came to things like that, always so in tune with the people she loved. Mia wished she wasn’t – she knew her sister hated knowing she wanted to die.

“We ain’t staying,” she told the man. Her voice sounded a little better now, but that allowed her exhaustion and pain to seep through to her words and she hated it. “As soon as this… this thing is done doing whatever it… When _this_ is over? We’re leaving.”

Shane nodded. “I won’t make you stay. But I won’t make you leave either.”

“Mia…” Sophie murmured. “We need him.”

“I don’t need anyone.” Mia clenched her hand into a fist, her voice a deadly snarl that would be enough to intimidate a grown man if she didn't look so weak. "We never had anyone before, and we made it through life just fine on our own.”

“I do.” Sophie’s voice was small, like daggers piercing Mia’s heart. “I need you alive. I can’t… I can’t do this unless…”

Mia closed her eyes. She knew. God, she fucking knew that. The only reason she’d gotten this far was to protect Sophie – she didn’t want to be there, be _anywhere_ , but who would look after her if she was gone? Not this jackass.

"Stay until yer on your feet and can walk, okay? Winter’s almost here and neither one’a ya is gonna survive the way ya are now."

Mia shut her eyes and pursed her chapped lips. He'd struck a chord. 

She knew they couldn't survive out there on their own, with or without winter on its way. They needed him, badly, and all three of them knew it. Shane didn't think about the implications or the feelings he got at that revelation. 

Mia fell back into the bed, her arms too weak to hold her up any longer. The towels under her hips were soaked in blood but it was slowing, just a bit. He didn't dare ask to change them right now. He could see the way they both fought consciousness. They needed food in their systems and more water than what little they'd had, but he wouldn't force the issue. 

"Get some sleep, okay? I'll be in the next room if ya need somethin’."

He set a bag of potato chips beside Sophie's hand along with another bottle of water, hoping maybe they'd eat without him around. And then he walked away, backed out of the room with his hands slightly raised to keep them in their view at all times.

He checked on them an hour later and found them passed out and wrapped up in each other’s arms. All three water bottles were empty, and so were the bags of chips and peanuts. Not even crumbs remained. He exhaled through his nose. At least they ate something, right? 

Shane leaned his shoulder against the doorframe, watched them sleep in the moonlight that filtered through the boarded up windows. They were fragile right now. Weak like sick new-born kittens in the way they could barely lift their heads or arms. Walking right now was definitely out of the question.

But they were still strong. Surviving this long? It was impressive. The other bodies he’d found out the back of the gas station had been rotting away for months now, and most likely died of blood loss judging by the dried puddles in that dirty concrete floor. The girls had held on to each other, and that was what had got them through.

He wouldn’t let that all be in vain, not on his watch. He could look after them in all the ways they wouldn’t be able to do for themselves. Provide them with a safe place to stay, put food and water in their bellies and fresh clothes on their backs for however long it took for them to recover. And maybe even longer, if they’d let him.

There were embers smouldering inside both of them that he understood perfectly, forged by a bond between family that made them fight tooth and nail – literally – to stay together, do whatever it took to protect each other even if it meant they suffered themselves. He’d had that, once. With her. With Carl. The baby he knew was his. But he shook those memories off, because they were useless to him now.

He could help stoke those embers back to the roaring fire he knew had once flowed through them, give them the opportunity they needed to kick start the healing process. It would take time and a tenderness he wasn’t sure he was capable of, but it would be worth it. They weren’t built to be kittens; they were born to be lionesses. He just knew it.

First and foremost, their bodies needed to recover. No amount of willpower would be enough to keep them functioning, put meat back on their bones and power in their muscles. In time, their physical strength would match their internal one, and if they could find it in themselves to trust him he could teach them how to defend themselves. That way, even if they did choose to leave they wouldn’t be going out there without a fighting chance.

Days passed and they slept more than anything else. Mia’s bleeding finally stopped, but then the cramps came with a vengeance and he’d often hear her gasp or whimper in her sleep, curled into a tiny little ball on the sheets and trembling with the effort not to cry out. To not show her pain or make it known to anyone but her. 

She wouldn't take any pain killers he brought them. Didn't trust he wouldn't drug her and take advantage of her. He almost slipped them into their water one day. Almost. But the fragile line of trust they had for him was barely a hair’s breadth. He couldn't afford to push on it and break it. 

He couldn't stand seeing her suffer either. And, fuck, was she suffering. She was barely holding on, wanting more than anything to just let go. He saw it in the way those icy eyes fill with tears of hatred. Not exactly towards him, more towards any male. Maybe even the whole world. And he understood. 

Sophie finally managed to sit up on her own for the first time just moments before, and he watched as she reached up to touch her hair. Saw her grimace at the matted feel of it, tangled with grease and blood and he didn't want to think of what else.

"I can bring the washtub in here, fill it up for you, and you can lock the door from inside if you’d like?"

Sophie blinked up at him, genuine surprise on her face.

“You… you’d do that for us?”

“Course I would.” Shane shuffled his weight from one foot to the other. “Ain’t exactly a problem. Can’t imagine it feels good to be…”

Sophie shuddered violently and he cursed himself for not thinking things through before opening his mouth.

“Sorry.” He rubbed a hand over the back of his head. “I’ll go get the tub.”

He brought it in and set it down by the bed, then busied himself filling it up with the water he’d warmed over the fire. It wouldn’t be more than a few inches deep, but it was better than nothing.

“You say that a lot,” Sophie said softly when he returned with a freshly refilled bucket of water and sponge, placing them by the tub so she could wash her hair.

“What do I say a lot?”

“Sorry.” Sophie looked down at her hands. “Not your fault. You’re only trying to help.”

“Feels like I ain’t doin’ enough,” he muttered, but she heard it anyway.

“You are.” She sighed sadly as she looked at her sister, who was tossing and turning again. “Would it be okay if… if you helped me wash it?”

Shane did a double take, unsure he’d heard her right.

“My… my hands keep shakin’ and…” She took a steadying breath. Forced herself to meet his gaze and try not to let her fear show. “I trust you.”

Shane said nothing. Couldn't think of what to say. So he brought in the few towels he had, grateful they were clean and dry and that one of them was still soft. He waited with his back turned as she undressed, folding up the borrowed shirt before placing it within reaching distance of the tub.

He stared at the wall until he heard the soft splash of water followed by her heavy sign at the feel of the warm water. Such simple things could mean the world to those who truly needed it. It may have only been a warm bath in a metal wash bin, but it meant more to that girl than anything in that moment. 

"I'm covered up... You can turn around now." Her voice was small, nervous. This was new territory for both of them. He turned and found her covered up just like she said, one of the towelled draped over her for modesty. 

She was nervous and shaking slightly, and he wanted nothing more than for it to stop. Shane wasn't a gentle man - this was out of his comfort zone. But he knelt behind her anyway, made sure to tell her everything he was doing while out of her sight. 

He carefully washed the muck from her hair, working his rough fingers soft and gentle against her scalp. He cringed as chucks of... _gunk_ \- he couldn't think of a better word - worked their way out from between the dark locks. Sighed as he found a gash on the back of her head he had missed before. It would need stitches and disinfectant, and that would hurt. 

He massaged her scalp, taking care not to touch the wound but knowing he had no choice but to clean the skin around it. As he worked his way down to the nape of her neck, her breathing hitched and her fingers wrapped around the edge of the tub on either side of her. She shuddered.

He frowned. “You okay?”

She nodded, but he saw the tears that had started to stream down her cheeks and swore under his breath. Her fingers snapped up to grip his wrists with surprising strength, stopping his hands from moving away when he tried to retreat.

“F-Feels nice,” she mumbled. Shane froze as his brain tried to process the fact she wanted him to touch her. “Please?”

“Uh…” He didn’t know what to do, and his hesitation made her heart sink.

“Sorry, I- I- I-“ She started to move away, curl into herself. Of course he wouldn’t want to touch her. She was disgusting. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey…” His warm hand hovered just above her shoulder, then gently coaxed her back to her previous position. The fact her instinct was still to recoil despite wanting the touch spoke volumes. “It’s okay, Darlin’. I just didn’t want to hurt ya.”

“You can’t hurt me any worse than… than they did.”

Sophie closed her eyes and let out a quiet sob when his fingers resumed their gentle movements. While her body had no idea what to do with itself, torn between rejecting and accepting his touch, she found herself wanting to talk to him. She always processed things out loud, but she couldn’t do it with Mia. She had no right to complain after her sister had done so much to save her from the worst of it…

“There were more than a dozen of them. I didn’t see their faces, but…” She shuddered. “One of them had a… a metal arm. With a blade. He liked to… that’s how…”

Shane’s fingers paused. Processed her meaning. Then he reached for the sponge in the bucket beside him and squeezed the water from it, letting it run down her hair and back.

“Is Mia… Is she…” Sophie choked on her own words. “Will it hurt her if I clean her up?”

“I don’t know,” Shane replied truthfully. “But I can refill the water for you while you dry off?”

Sophie nodded. “Thank you.”

Shane sighed. Shook his head, because she was so grateful for a damned bucket of water that anybody else would take for granted. Because she was thanking him for doing the bare minimum but acting like he’d hung the moon. And wasn’t that a joke, that he was the most decent human being she’d been around in a long while?

He handed her the soft towel and got to his feet. Turned his back while she climbed out the tub. Waited long enough for her to wrap herself up before bending down to pick up the bucket and tub.

“I’ll be right back.”

He threw the dirty water out the window, then prepared more hot water before carrying everything back to the room. Sophie was wearing a different one of his shirts this time, and the fabric engulfed her down to mid-thigh. He didn’t let his gaze linger, just focused on setting things up and getting out of there as soon as possible.

“Wait…”

He paused by the door, hand resting on the frame.

“What’s your name?” she asked. “They didn’t… they didn’t tell me theirs. But I want to know yours.”

“Shane. My name is Shane.”

“Thank you, Shane.” Sophie looked down at her sister, stroking her fingers across the back of the sleeping girl’s knuckles. “I know she won’t say it, but Mia is grateful too. She just… is so used to fighting that she forgets she doesn’t have to sometimes.”

“Nothin’ to thank me for,” Shane said softly. “You deserve a lot more.”

He headed back into the main room and heard soft voices from down the hallway, signalling Mia was now awake.

Shane let them be, but listened intently in case one of them fell or their voices raised in alarm. He paced in the main room. Fed the fire while his mind raced. 

The only person he knew of with one hand was Merle, who had cut his off to escape walkers after Rick had left him on a roof in the city. Once again, another stupid decision made by Rick that had consequences for others. If he was right, and Merle was the same animal Sophie had described, he was going on a rampage. 

Then he heard it. A soft cry. A little exclamation of fright or shock.

He ran, barely stopping himself to knock before he opened the door. He wouldn’t notice until much later that it wasn't locked. 

Mia had tried and failed to sit herself into the tub. In doing so, her legs had buckled and she’d fallen into it. Thankfully, she hadn't toppled it over, but judging by the way her hands clutched onto her already bruised and cut ankle, she had most likely rolled it. 

She gasped, ripping the only free towel from Sophie's hands and covering herself with it, once again glaring at him with that ice in her gaze. 

"Easy… Are you okay?" he asked softly. He didn't make another move toward them, instead choosing to lower himself some to not seem so large. Sophie ignored him, actually turning her back to him as she knelt down to block Mia's cold gaze. 

"Mia, please. You need to clean your wounds, and that cut needs stitches too..." Sophie leaned forward, forehead touching Mia's. The other girl took a deep shuddering breath, taking in the scent of soap and clean, and her bottom lip trembled.

"Please, please..." Sophie kept repeating softly to her sister. She wanted her to fight, to want to live. To want her wounds cleaned and dressed. To want to be warm and feel safe here. To want something other than death for herself or another. This wasn't the sister she’d grown up with. Her fire was dwindling. 

When Mia finally nodded against her sisters forehead, Shane stood slowly, not wanting to startle them. He watched Sophie move again and saw her wince as her knees touched the floor. 

"Will you need help getting’ out of that?" he asked. Mia's eyes flickered over to him. He could see the hatred in her eyes, knew the fear behind it only drove it harder into her soul. 

Shane wasn’t a religious man. But by God… He wanted to make that hatred leave her eyes. To melt the ice behind her gaze.

She surprised him by giving him a curt nod. He didn't wait for anything else, knew that was the most he was going to get at this point, and closed the door behind him. 

He waited in the hall, back sliding down the wood til his ass hit the floor. His leg were bent at sharp angles and his forearm hung over one knee, the hand of the other arm ruffling his hair. He didn't know how to act or what to do. 

He could see the potential in their eyes, especially Mia's. That fire, that fight, that rage inside… it narrowly matched his own when he bothered to look in the mirror.

His fist made contact with the side of his thigh. He barely contained the animalistic growl rising in his throat and the gleam in his eyes. It'd been a damn long time since he wanted anything, but now he wanted _them._

He wasn’t even sure what exactly it was that he wanted from them. It wasn’t a sexual thing, not really – he wasn’t that much of an animal to want to prey on them – but he saw something buried within them that he wanted to reach out and grab with both hands. Maybe he was just lonely or maybe he was fucking crazy after all, but he could see them slotting into the empty places in his life. See how they could become a team, but only if that was what they wanted.

He would never ever do anything they didn’t want him to. And if down the line his desire to keep them close turned down that lustful path, he could control it. He wouldn’t let his dick screw up what could be a perfect companionship… if it ever got to that stage.

Right now, he just wanted them healthy. He could deal with all the other shit later.

“Sh-Shane?”

He looked up at Sophie, who was timidly peeking out from behind the door.

“Will you…?”

He nodded. Scrubbed a hand over his head again. “Is she…”

“She’s covered,” Sophie assured him. “Just… be careful?”

“I will be. I promise.”

Sophie smiled nervously, then led him back inside.

“Mia, Shane’s here.”

Shane knew Mia was already aware of that. Her spine was completely rigid, and even though her head was turned she was definitely tracking his every move.

Sophie came to stand in front of her sister, hands reaching out to cup her cheeks and making sure their gazes met. “He’s going to touch you now, Mia, but it’s okay. I’m right here.”

Shane tried so very hard not to cringe at the sight of the water in the metal basin. It was red black, and thick with grime and everything else that had fallen or washed off her body. He held it back, focused instead on the stick and bones woman in front of him, huddled in the free towel and trying not to get it wet as it hung over her shoulder. 

"I'm gonna reach under your knees, then put you straight on the bed okay, Darlin’?"

She only gave a simple nod in response, her eyes closing as he came close enough to do as he had said. 

She weighed practically nothing in his arms, but the movement caused her to cry out. Her fingers of her right hand clenched tightly to his shirt as she gasped and tried to even her breathing. She clutched to him for dear life for a half second before she realized what she had done and let go as if he was on fire. 

He set her down gently on the blankets and sheets and noticed that Sophie had replaced them with clean ones so Mia wouldn't be laying in her own blood again. He quickly but gently took his hands away. Mia sighed and laid back into the pillows, her body exhausted just from the effort of taking a tiny bath in a basin barely bigger than a bucket.

"Sophie said you had a nasty wound somewhere too? I got to stitch that up, or it'll get infected."

He watched as Mia closed her eyes and nodded again, half asleep already. He'd have to give her food later, when she was more awake. 

It didn't take long to patch up Sophie - it was a small inch long gash at the back of her crown. Not big, but deep enough to need three stitches to keep it closed. Now it wasn’t so grimy, Shane noticed her hair was dark brown, almost chocolate colored in the late morning light. 

"Thank you..."

He almost didn't hear it, her voice was soft, small, filled with emotion. He knew the gratitude was for more than just stitching her up. It was everything he had done so far, which in his eyes wasn’t very much considering it was the end of society and all that. 

Shane gently patted her upper arm, noting the way she flinched at first, but had calmed again by the second small tap of his fingers. She’d forced herself not to reel back from the contact. She wanted it. Wanted his touch.

He'd think on that later. 

"She's asleep," Sophie noted as she climbed onto the bed weakly, her own exhaustion showing.

Shane needed to stitch up that wound of Mia’s, though. She couldn't lose anymore blood, not after that... that miscarriage. 

"Wake her up for me? This won't take me a minute." 

Sophie nodded, then shifted closer to her sister, partially blocking Shane from view as she tenderly swept back Mia’s damp hair from her forehead.

“Mia…” Her voice cracked. Her sister never looked this vulnerable. “Mia, honey… Wake up.”

When the girl didn’t even stir, Shane felt a pang of worry.

“Mia…” Sophie almost sang. “Open your eyes for me. I need you.”

Mia groaned in pain as her eyes fluttered open, then cried out when she spotted Shane standing by the bed. Sophie caught her wrists before they had a chance to flail, ready for her sister’s reaction.

“It’s okay! You’re okay!”

Mia shook violently.

“Hey. Hey!” Sophie pressed their foreheads together again. It was their thing, Shane realized. What brought Mia back from the brink. “It’s only Shane. He needs to stitch up that cut on your thigh, remember?”

Mia nodded, looking a little less disorientated but somehow in more pain than before.

“I’ll need to move the towel so I can see,” Shane told her, keeping his tone gentle. “Is that okay?”

Mia looked at Sophie, and a silent conversation flowed between them. The closest Shane had to a sibling was Rick, but he knew the twins’ connection was deeper than he could even start to comprehend. They were two halves of a whole.

“That’s okay,” Sophie spoke for her sister. “Just go slow.”

Shane carefully sat on the very edge of the bed and peeled back the towel, mouth setting into an angry line. The gash in question was clearly from a blade, but its placement was high up on her thigh, almost at her hip. The same place a hand would be if it was holding her in place while…

He grabbed hit makeshift suture kit from the bed and threaded a fresh needle. Focused on the task at hand.

“I’m going to have to push the edges together so I can sew this shut, okay?” he warned. “It’s gonna hurt, and I’m really sorry for that, but I’ll be quick as I can, I promise.”

She screamed at the first touch of the needle. A horrid, scratchy wail that shook Shane to his core worse than Lori's cries of fear ever had. He was torturing her, doing this, and he knew it.

He breathed heavily through his nose.

“I’m sorry, Mia.” It was almost a plea. He needed her to quieten if he was going to be able to finish this. “Shh… Shh… Please…”

He had to get it done quick so she wouldn't be in anymore pain. Couldn’t afford to let her sounds of pain distract him.

"It's okay. It's okay…" Sophie took her sister’s hand between her own and looked down to where Shane was busy at work. She winced at the tiny trickle of blood that oozed from the wound when he pinch the flesh together tightly in order to sew it together. 

Mia’s fingers gripped Sophie's in a white-knuckle hold as she whimpered into her other fist. Her teeth sunk into her own knuckles as she tensed the rest of her body, trying to hold it all in. It was like being stabbed over and over through already raw flesh, her nerves sending fiery signals to her over-loaded brain and telling her to do whatever it took to get away from the source of the pain. From Shane.

She wished he’d hurry the fuck up, but knew she wasn’t making it easy on him. Couldn’t stop her body’s reaction, though.

"Nearly done..." he whispered, and was surprised when he could sort of make out her response. Something along the lines of ' _get it over with already!_ '.

"There we go. All done."

Normally he'd offer his ‘patient’ a heavy drink after an ordeal like that, but booze was not the way to go this time. With her. He wanted to pat her thigh in reassurance, but thought better of it, instead sending her a kind look with his eyes and handing her a clean flannel button down to change into from his dresser.

Her hand shook slightly, but she grabbed the fabric with her own hands, accepting the help.

Once again, her sister spoke for her, uttering a soft thank you to him and smiling gratefully. He nodded back in acknowledgement, but said nothing more as he carried the tub and bucket out the room, his nose turning up at the sight of the filth that had come from the girls. 

How long had they gone without being clean? How long had they laid there injured, risking infection after infection with those open wounds? How had they not died from blood poisoning by now?

Shane scrubbed the tub clean with fervor, getting some of the anger inside of him out of his system in the process. They didn't need to see the evidence of their torture – if they did, they'd probably run. 

His hands trembled dangerously as he put the tub and bucket back in their place, and he had to clench and unclench his fists a few times to make them stop. His training as a cop had done nothing to prepare him for something like this. He knew how devastating domestic abuse and rape was to survivors under ‘typical’ circumstances, knew how to deal with those situations, but this was worse than all of those cases combined and it left him feeling helpless.

The more he uncovered about their ordeal, the less he understood how they’d been able to make it through to the other side. He was barely holding it together himself, and he hadn’t been anywhere near it. But thinking about it over and over would do nothing, he knew that much.

They didn’t need him to think about it or wonder about the ifs and whys and hows. They needed someone to be strong for them, unyielding… someone who would let them heal by themselves instead of interfering and screwing with the process. Someone like him.

He could be that person. Their guardian. Whatever the fuck they’d call it.

He swore to that God he didn’t believe in that he wouldn’t fuck this up like he had everything else. Wouldn’t fuck _them_ up.

Only time would tell if that oath was one he could keep, so for now he’d settle for trying his best and catching some long overdue sleep.

This was going to be a long, bumpy ride.


	2. We Are Broken (we just wanna be whole)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shane Walsh, this hulking man of men who helped them. Fed them. Kept them warm? He was using them. He wanted something in return, she just knew it. He’d thought he found easy prey. 
> 
> He was severely mistaken.
> 
> A little snippet from Mia's POV, set soon after the girls get settled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are love and life, as always! xx

Winter found Shane and the girls in a snow storm from Hell. It piled up around the small cabin, buried the jeep in its white heavy fluff. Wind rattled the roof and windows tittered as the cold tried to press its hand into the warmth inside. 

Shane had been smart, stockpiling wood just inside the door for days now to make sure they wouldn't be without heat in case this very thing happened. He’d gone to the station as many times as it took to siphon gas, take _everything_ off the shelves, stockpile packages of bottled water and anything else he could find useful.

He picked it clean while the girls rested those five weeks. They still slept more than anything as their bodies tried to reboot and regain energy. It was a slow process and they had only just begun it.

Sophie could just barely walk across the house without clutching to the wall for support, and Mia was now standing on her own for short periods of time. She refused help, going so far as to snarl at Shane if he even moved toward her on the occasions she fell to the floor. She didn't trust him anymore than before – it had become a kind of stalemate between them. He wouldn't push her, she wouldn't rip his head off. Again, Shane was smart. 

Once the storm hit, Shane moved the mattresses to the main room near the fireplace. It was warmer that way, and he shut off the other rooms to conserve heat. The original bed he’d slept on was little more than a queen-sized pillow top mattress over a box spring, but he’d let the girls take it and settled for the small twin mattress from the spare room instead even though he barely fit.

He would never even think of asking to take his bed back. The image of teeth at his throat came to mind before that thought could fully form. Not that he would have ever demanded they switch – the twins wouldn’t fit on that twin bed, though he was sure there was probably a joke in that statement somewhere.

Snow piled high to the windows. Gusts of wintery air pushed at the cabin. But still it stood proud and strong against the elements, keeping its occupants warm, even as Mia continued to give Shane the cold shoulder. 

She watched the snow fall heavy from the slats between the boards on the windows. A threadbare quilt hung over her shoulders, and her thin legs and arms were trapped in the warmth of men's sweatpants and several sweaters. It was all Shane could find, but it was enough. 

She kept quiet and observed silently from her spot at the window as Sophie curled into the blankets around her shoulders where she sat in front of the fire. Her twin was asking Shane the strangest questions, all to fill the silence that had fallen between the three of them. Sophie was like that - a talker, open mouthed and minded, trusting. Mia, however, was not.

“You ever been to Switzerland, Shane?

Mia shook her head and rolled her eyes. _Here she goes again._

“Switzerland?” came the stunned reply. “Uh… No, can’t say I have…”

“I always wanted to go,” Sophie said wistfully. “Always loved the idea of going skiing. We, uh… We were gonna go for our birthday, weren’t we, Mia?”

Mia said nothing. Kept her gaze averted, soaking up the freezing cold from outside the window. 

Sophie carried on, undeterred. “But um… Walkers. Y’know?”

Mia watched Shane nod, saw the hint of a smile threaten to turn his lips up. She understood why – Sophie was hard not to like. She’d always had the bigger friendship group. Drew people in. Trusted the wrong people. It was her biggest flaw.

Mia was the opposite. Very few, but very trusted friends. She took no shit and if someone had a problem with her she took them down. Cold-hearted except when it came to her sister. Mia could never deny her anything if it would make her happy.

_“Come on, Mia, they said they’ve got other women in their camp – we’ll be safe there.”_

She should have just run with her sister there and then and never looked back. 

“You go on vacation a lot, Shane?” Sophie continued as she played with a loose thread from the edge of the blanket, twirling it round and round her finger. “Must have been nice. Bet you always got stuck bein’ the daddy of the group, though.”

Something flashed across Shane’s face, then. Mia saw it. Sophie didn’t.

“I was a cop… before.” Shane rubbed a head over his head. “So, uh…”

“Didn’t get much time away?” Sophie assumed. “That sucks. Explains why you’re so good at lookin’ after people though, if you were a cop.”

Again, Mia saw Shane visibly keep flinch back out of the corner of her eye. Her frosty gaze narrowed. 

"It's been just me and Mia for years now, even before everything, you know… went crazy." Sophie stared at the fire dancing. "We travelled a lot. Cities and countries. Usually hot climates, though." 

Shane nodded gently. Listening to Sophie talk was nice. It filled the long silences and helped him get a picture of who the girls were. Or rather, who Sophie was. He only had the bare basics but understood Mia easily enough. Older sister. The protective one. Bark just as lethal as her bite. All he needed to know.

"Did you have any family, Shane?"

Mia saw the way his shoulders stilled at that. How his hand paused just half second before he brought a hand rolled cigarette to his lips and took a long drag. 

"Had a brother once. Sort of. He had a family," was all he offered in answer. Mia catalogued that answer for later. "We got separated last year. Dunno where they are now." 

"I'm sorry." And that was Sophie in a nutshell, wasn’t it? Always apologizing for things she had nothing to do with. Always helping and trying to make everyone happy.

"S'alright." Shane gave Sophie a soft smile, then frowned as he watched her shiver despite the blanket and sweaters. "Here, I'll get you another blanket."

He left the room without waiting for a response. Mia knew what he was doing. Collecting his thoughts, hiding emotions. Hiding things. Important things.

"Mia, I know that look.” A soft sigh. “You need to stop. He took us in and saved us. _Keeps_ saving us. The least you could do is stop being such an ice queen about it. He didn’t do this to us."

Mia’s head snapped around, chestnut hair bouncing in its braid as one twin glared at the other. Mia waited, unblinking, until Sophie relented and looked away. Mia felt a twinge of regret, but there were times she did not want to be coerced into being nice or have Sophie constantly try to make her see the good in people. This was one of them.  

Shane came back, placing another blanket over Sophie's shoulders and silently accepting her soft thank you. He went back to his chair, arms folded, legs splayed and knees bent lazily. His feet were wrapped in thick socks and angled toward the fire as he stared at the flames. But Mia knew he was watching her, and he knew she was watching him

“Do you…” Sophie hesitated, like she knew her next question might cross a line. But, like always, she pushed through anyway. “Do you have any happy stories, Shane?”

He stared at her, looking completely disarmed. Lost. Unsteady.

Sophie’s face fell and she instantly started to stammer out an apology. “I-I-I-”

Shane cut her off, tone gentle to counter her distress. “Best prank I ever pulled? And ya ain’t allowed to judge me for this, by the way, but…”

He recounted a time he stole his high school prinicipal’s car, and Mia watched as Sophie hung off his every word, face brightening by the second. Watched as her sister laughed, genuinely, when Shane confessed to driving the stolen car three miles away to a chicken farm on his lunch break and pouring bags of seed into the back seat. Saw her twin stretch her legs out until her feet touched his and noted that she didn’t flinch at the contact. Didn’t even seem to realize she was even touching him.

Mia’s hands clenched into fists.

“Did you get back in time for the bell?” Sophie asked.

“Course I did.” Shane smirked. “Ran into him in the hallway, told him his coupe was gone.”

“Coupe?” Sophie giggled. “’Cause of the chicken coop?”

Shane chuckled, expression soft. 

“Exactly.”

Sophie smiled shyly, and Mia saw the way Shane smiled back like he couldn’t help it. She knew her sister had grown fond of their ‘savior’, but that wasn’t what made her feel so on edge. It was the fact that his own fondness reflected straight back at her, even though he tried to hide it.

Mia didn’t know what game he was playing. What angle he was working. But she knew there was more to him than met the eye. Her sister just chose not to see it. And it was definitely a choice, a deliberate decision on Sophie’s part. Her twin wasn’t stupid – she had a way of understanding people from a perspective Mia never could.

Mia knew people other ways. Saw the darkness in them before the light. Before what had happened to them had happened, Mia was just as vigilant as she was now. She knew how people manipulated others to get what they wanted. That was not her first experience of abuse.

That was all she saw now. So Shane? Shane Walsh, this hulking man of men who came barging into that freezer when they were on the brink of death? Who helped them. Stitched them up. Fed them. Kept them warm? He was using them. He wanted something in return, she just knew it. Two women in need of medical help and protection, in this world where women were few and far between? He’d thought he found easy prey. 

He was severely mistaken.

"Sophie, time for bed."

They were the first words Mia had spoken all day and night, soft but loud and strong enough for her sister to hear. Mia wanted Sophie to rest – they were still weak and healing, after all - but she also needed to ask all the questions Sophie should have, had her kind heart thought of them.

Sophie did as bid, moving across to the larger mattress and settling down for the night without protest. She laid down just off the middle of it, on the left side of the blankets and sheets. Had always taken that same side of any bed they shared since birth.

Mia didn't move from the window, and her legs protested in their weakness. The muscles that were no longer strong and lithe were yelling at her nerve endings to collapse, yet she held strong and waited for her sister to fall asleep. Watched Shane gaze at Sophie from the corner of her eye.  

When Sophie’s breathing finally evened out, Mia turned away from the window and crossed her arms over her chest. Shane didn’t look at her. Kept his eyes on Sophie’s sleeping form.

“She trusts you,” Mia said coldly.

Shane said nothing at first. Just leaned back in his chair and lit up another cigarette. Even his shoulders were lax.

“You don’t.” His reply was flat, stoic. Like he was asking about the weather just to supply food for conversation. 

Mia snarled out a cruel parody of a laugh. She wanted to rile him up. Wanted to get under his skin. Because when she did? That’s when his true colors would show. When his inner monster would be thrust into the open and prove her instincts correct.

“You’ve done nothing to earn it.”

 A sigh. A drag from the cigarette. “I know.”

Mia’s hands clenched into fists again. Come on… show yourself.

“I don’t want your help. I don’t need saving.”

“I know that, too.”

Mia ground her teeth, frustrated at his refusal to argue with her. “So why let us stay here, huh? What, do you- do you think that we’re gonna be so grateful to you for drawing out our misery that we’re gonna fulfil your Daddy fantasies? Let you tie us to the bed and do every dirty little depraved thing you want to us?”

His voice remained calm. “If that’s what I wanted, you and I both know I would have done it by now.” His head tilted to the left, just a fraction, and she could see the dark whiskey color of his eyes look at her softly. Willing her to believe him. 

She glowered at his back. Wished his head would explode and his heart would beat right out of his chest. Because he was right. He hadn't done anything, _anything_ , to them without permission or good reason. He'd patched them back together and used his slender stockpile of supplies to keep them from perishing of starvation.  

She didn't trust his word anymore than she did him. Yet, deep down, she knew it was true. If he really, truly wanted to, all he’d have had to do was stitch them up and then go at them like the others had. Shane was not a small man - he was well-built and broad shouldered in a way that told her he always had been, but somehow managed to keep up even after the end of the world. 

Mia looked back out the window. The dark night was lit just barely by the moonlight peeking through the cloud cover as the storm raged outside and inside her.

"Don't get attached, Walsh. You'll get more than you bargained for with that one."

She heard him slump further into the chair, his breath deep but stuttered as he took another long drag of the cigarette. Smoke billowed from his nostrils and barely split lips. "I'm trying."

Trying and failing, obviously.

“We aren’t a replacement for them,” Mia told him firmly. It was probably a low blow, digging her newly growing nails into that clearly open wound, and she almost felt guilty about it. Almost. Did it some more anyway. “Whoever the fuck you lost.”

She saw his eyes fall shut, but that anger she’d expected didn’t come. She started to wonder, deep in the back of her mind, if it was ever going to.

“I ain’t stupid. I know that.”

Mia thought back to that something she’d seen on his face when Sophie had mentioned how well he must’ve looked after his people before. Regret? Self-loathing?

“Did they die?” Mia wanted to know. “Or did you kill them? You don’t strike me as the kind of guy to just let someone walk away.”

Shane let out a choked sound, fingers curling ever so slightly, but that frustration there wasn’t directed at her. It was at himself. At someone else. Mia took a step forward, legs protesting without the side of the wall to hold her up.

His voice was gravelly when he replied, “I killed _for_ them.”

“They hated you for it,” Mia realized.

Shane brought the cigarette to his lips again. “They didn’t get it. They didn’t realize we ain’t got many choices in this world. That if it… if it’s their life or someone else’s, they gotta just do it.”

"They couldn't understand, even though you did it for them. Because they wouldn’t," she said softly, another step and another until she was standing by the fire, just out of arm’s reach but far enough away. She watched him from the corner of her eye. Waited.

"No, they didn't. Left me for dead, doing the exact same thing they thought I’d been so wrong to." He finished the cigarette, tossed the butt into the fire with a flick of his fingers. 

"They're probably dead then. Thinking that way." She felt bad for him, a tiny bit, because he did the best he could to protect them and they still left him wounded and alone because of it. Least they could have fucking done was kill him right. Not left him to roam the Earth as a walker.

It didn't make up for the fact he wanted something from them. What, Mia still didn't know, but she'd find out sooner or later. She’d punch through those walls he had around his heart and make him confess what he really desired. It was only a matter of time.

“I’d do the same for her,” she warned quietly. “I have before. I’d do it again.”

“Older twin, right?” Off Mia’s surprised look, he added, “I can read people, too.”

“If you can read people so well, you should have realized we aren’t weak. We won’t bow down to anyone.”

“I did,” Shane said softly. “As soon as I saw you.”

“Then why choose to save us? If you knew we weren’t easy targets.”

“You aren’t prey, Mia. Neither of you are.” He pushed himself to his feet, but Mia didn’t flinch, even when he moved past her to head for his makeshift bed on the floor on the opposite side of the room. “I saw how you fought for each other and… I couldn’t just let you die.”

Mia said nothing as he readied himself for bed and climbed beneath the blankets. Just stared into the fire.

“I know you’re not going to be their replacements.” His voice was so quiet that she had to strain to hear it. “But you need to realize that I’m not going to be _their_ replacements, either. I couldn’t do that to anyone, let alone her. Or you. I’m not that kind of monster.”

She heard what he didn't say. _'But I am some kind of monster'_. She said nothing else for a long while. Watched the fire burn and burn, even added wood to it herself. Not so Shane didn't have to get up, no. For herself. 

She climbed into bed with Sophie and laid the blanket from around her shoulders over them both. She curled into her sister’s sleeping form, grateful for warmth that had spread to the sheets as well, and turned so she could watch the firelight dance over the ceiling. She listened to the wind blow outside. 

"We're all monsters, Shane. It's which kind of monster we choose to be that matters," she murmured into the night, not sure if he was still awake to hear it but saying it all the same. She rolled onto her side and brushed back hair from Sophie's face, then closed her eyes to the night. 

She watched him with a little less apprehension after that. She never let her guard down. Not ever. But the way he tried so hard to keep Sophie’s spirits up and the fact her sister was healing right before her very eyes with his encouragement made Mia warm to him. 

Slightly. Like ice that was barely melting, but thawing all the same.

While winter crawled by, he continued to risk his own safety to grab supplies for all three of them, making more trips than necessary because he had to bring back triple the amount he was used to. A few times, he’d come back injured, and Sophie had actually patched him up, once.

Shane had talked her through how to make secure stitches, using his own flesh as her training field, even though his own hands would have made quicker and neater work of the task. Mia had stood by to keep an eye on things, picking up the method even though she wasn’t getting to physically practice it.

Not once did he raise his voice or show any signs of anger towards her sister, even when she messed up a couple of the stitches and jabbed him with the needle with her clumsy hands. Instead, his tone only seemed to soften more, but not to the point of being patronizing.

They’d grown stronger every day, gaunt cheeks starting to fill as their bony frames bulked just a little. They were still malnourished, but so was everyone these days. But Mia was just itching to get outside. She’d been trapped for too long.

“Do you girls need anythin’ from this run?” Shane called from the spare room.

"I'm coming with you." Mia stood by the door as Shane went to check how much gas was in the jeep. Early spring was upon them, and the chilly air made her cheeks tinge pink a bit.

Shane's head whipped around so fast he could have broken his neck. Mia only raised an eyebrow, touched the sheathed blade on her belt loop and dared him with her eyes to say no. 

Silently challenging him as always.

"Abso-fuckin’-loutely not!" Shane growled at her from the Jeep.

It was the first and only time he'd ever remotely raised his voice at them, at her, and Mia smirked a bit because of it. She liked that he was finally growing a backbone and talking back to her. It was about time.

"I'm coming." Her tone was indisputable, daring him to tell her different. She walked forward out of the cabin, tugging on a light ball cap over chestnut locks that were braided down her back. Her blade was at her hip and jaw was set.

"You're not going." Shane stood to his full height, arms cross, as if maybe his size would intimate her into staying within the safety of the cabin. That maybe she'd see him and think better of leaving the safety here. Flinch back and go inside. He knew better than that.

Her gaze narrowed as she opened the Jeep passenger door, then hopped inside and closed it behind her. Shane just stood there, mouth agape and eyes slightly wide at her audacity and staring at the blurry vision of her behind the dirty window. 

She rolled it down with the crank and leaned toward it.

“You didn’t really think that would work, right?” Mia raised her eyebrow. “I’m not scared of you.

Shane ran a hand over his head, frustrated. He did not want her going out there just to get herself killed. He eyed her for a moment, saw the determination, then shook his head and huffed out a breath. “Fine."

“If she’s going, so am I."

Sophie emerged from behind Shane, mouth set in a determined line.

“Sophie-”

“No way-”

“Don’t.” Sophie’s voice was sharp as she glared at the two of them, cutting off their protests. “And don’t you dare even try telling me it’s safer if I stay behind. That’s bullshit.”

“You’re not ready,” Mia told her. “Soph, you-”

“Screw you, Mia. You’re in no better state than I am, and you know it.”

Mia stared at her sister, then. Saw the fire in her eyes. She’d always had a stubborn streak, but it rarely revealed itself unless it was for something Sophie felt passionately about. Mia took in the way her sister held her head high and stood with her fists clenched and her feet hip width apart, almost defiantly.

This was definitely one of those times.

“Either we’re all going, or all three of us are staying,” Sophie continued, and Mia knew she meant that.

She looked at Shane, ending their stalemate.

He sighed uneasily. “Darlin’, I…”

Mia tried not to growl at the constant pet name for her sister. He didn’t seem to even consciously do it, which made it even worse.

“Shane.” Sophie put her hand on Shane’s arm and gazed up at him, her expression softening but still determined.

Mia saw the exact moment he surrendered.

“Fine.” He reached for his knife. “But take this. I’ll try’n cover you both, but-”

“You won’t need to,” Sophie promised, taking the knife and flipping the blade over in her hands. “We can handle ourselves.”

Sophie headed over to the Jeep and opened the rear passenger door before hopping in behind her sister.

“We good?” she asked quietly.

"Always," Mia softly said back and waited for Shane to get in the driver’s seat. 

The engine roared to life and they were off, tires sliding gently over soft spots in the grass until they eventually made their way to the old gravelled road that led back to the blacktop. 

Mia played with the knife from her belt. She'd found it in the back room, where Shane kept all the canned supplies. It was the length of her forearm, an inch and half wide and so razor sharp it could probably cut glass. Her favorite part was that it was serrated.

She liked it. The weight of it. The way it felt like an extension of her arm. She felt empowered with to have a weapon other than her own nails and teeth. It felt safe. 

Shane watched from the corner of his eye as he drove to the small town where he'd found them. Saw Mia flipped the knife over and over, testing the weight of it in her hand. He hid his smile as her lips twitched into a barely there smirk. There was that spark. 

"Homes are picked clean mostly, but the stores are locked up still and prob’ly need clearin’.”

He filled them in on the situation. They'd never asked about it before and he never saw the need to tell them. Not when it was only a matter of time before they left.

“They travelling in swarms here?” Mia asked. “Or they in isolated groups?”

“Groups, mostly,” he replied. “Not seen a herd in a while. Not through here, anyways.”

“Probably still not a good idea to use a gun though,” Sophie said softly.

“Definitely not,” Shane agreed.

They pulled up outside a grocery store nobody seemed to have attempted to breach yet before Shane killed the engine.

“I’ll go in ahead. Scout the perimeter, take down any loose walkers that show.”

“And we’re just gonna, what? Wait in the car?” Sophie rolled her eyes. “That’s a stupid plan.”

“I can take ‘em down by hand just fine,” Shane promised. “I’ll call you if I need back-up.”

Sophie laughed outright at him and Mia smirked, knowing exactly what was going through her twin’s head. Shane was left out of the loop.

“We ain’t your back up,” Mia told him. “You’re ours.”

Shane shook his head almost angrily. "Not for nuthin’, but outta the three of us I’m the-”

“Alpha male?” Mia retorted with a snort. "We already got that memo.”

“Shane, just trust us.” Sophie leaned forward to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder. Mia’s gaze narrowed, but she didn’t comment. “We’ve got this.”

“I know you think you do, but-”

“But nothing,” Mia interjected. “If we’re gonna make this work, we’ll have to start up a bigger stock of supplies. You can’t sustain all three of us on a coupl’a cans of beans and some jerky.”

Shane was flabbergasted. He didn't know where the sudden confidence in Sophie or the downright mirthful and sadistic smirk on Mia's lips under that ball cap came from. But he kind of liked it and kind of hated it at the same time. 

Mia was out of the car already, stretching her arms above her head. Sophie did the same, shaking out her spine before they nodded to each other and busted through the front door.

"Motherfucker!" Shane grabbed the crowbar from the back of the jeep and leapt through the swinging glass door after them, only to freeze in his tracks. 

Mia was crouched low, her arm outstretched to the side, blade already bloody. Sophie ran from the side, kick-started off Mia's back, and swung her leg out. The side of her foot collided solidly with the jaw of a walker, breaking it clean off, and then her blade was sinking into its skull as she dropped with one leg outstretched and the other bent sharply under her. 

Before Sophie could move up again and grab her knife, Mia was moving, running quickly over the dusty floor until she was up the side of the fucking wall and leaping onto the closest shelf to climb up the rest of the way. She used the height advantage to leap over two more shelving units and onto two more walkers.  Her knife sunk into one’s skull as she kicked the legs out from under the other.

Sophie took down another two on her own before turning to smirk at Shane with blood spatter on her cheek. A giggle slipped past her lips as she winked at him.

The sounds of crunching bone and brains filled the store as Mia's boot stomped once more, just for fun, on the walker’s head.

Six walkers downed by two tiny malnourished sisters who only a couple months ago were on their deathbeds.

Mia pushed her ball cap backwards, slinging her blade to clear the blood from it. She stalked more than walked, hips swaying as her feet moved so silently Shane would have never guessed she was moving at all if he wasn’t looking right at her.

"Shane..." Mia's mouth quirked as she moved.

Sophie smiled and laughed softly in that sweet way she always did as she watched her sister come forward.

Mia’s forefinger pushed on his apparently gaping open jaw. "You'll catch flies."

Shane stared down at the brunette, unsure if he was more shocked at what he’d just seen or the fact Mia had willingly touched him for the first time. She smirked, then stepped away, scanning the rest of the store.

“Soph, you missed one.”

A blur of movement caught his attention as Sophie turned and threw her knife at the final walker. The blade pierced through its eye. A bullseye.

“Ha!” Sophie clapped herself, then grinned at them both. “Did you see that? Knew I still had it!”

“Your form was off,” Mia teased.

“Screw you,” Sophie shot back. “Like you could’ve done any better.”

Shane shook his head, unable to comprehend any of it. “What the fuck.”

Mia raised an eyebrow at Sophie before heading off to start searching the aisles. She saw her sister walk over to Shane and smile proudly.

“Told you we had it,” she said cheerfully. “You don’t have to worry about us, not when it comes to these monsters. We can handle those.”

“No shit,” Shane muttered.

Sophie’s smile softened into something Mia couldn’t stand. She knew that smile.

“Come on.” She pushed herself onto her tiptoes and kissed his cheek. “We got shopping to do.”

Many trips back to the Jeep later, they were still finding good supplies.

Shane ripped open a new pack of menthol cigarettes and took a long drag from one as the twins shared a bag of jerky and an energy drink. 

"Okay, please just... How the fuck?" He pointed to the bodies of the walkers they took out. His eyebrows raised as he watched the both of them shrug at each other before Sophie gestured forward.

Mia rolled her eyes and took a long drink from the energy can. "We got bored in college, started free running, parkour, y’know, all that stuff. Comes in real handy." Her teeth ripped another chunk of jerky into her mouth. "We even got invited to do that one show, American Ninja Warrior? We were on our way there when the army had the airport shut down."

She shrugged as if it was nothing. But it wasn’t.

Shane had only seen that kind of fluidity outside of movies and TV from those who devoted their lives to it. Color him insanely impressed. That didn’t keep his mind from getting bogged down over Mia actually touching him or Sophie openly kissing his cheek, though. It made him itchy, wanting to move himself. To do something. He hadn’t gotten to kill anything thanks to their... Ninja-ness. 

"And the knife throwing?" he asked. Another drag from the cigarette. 

"Learned as we went," Sophie answered. They traded their drink and jerky, sharing fluidly without speaking to the other. A team. 

"You ran up the wall... Up. The. _Wall..._ ” 

Mia rolled her eyes at him.  

" _U_ _p the fucking wall..._ " He was more mumbling to himself now than asking them for answers, free hand ruffling his hair as he tried to process everything. He wished he could cut it – it was getting too long now. "Fucking ninja spiderwomen... The fuck?"

The sisters only glanced at each other and grinned widely, trying very hard not to snort or laugh at his shock. Both of them were very flexible from years of ballet, dance and gymnastics, and used to using their own bodies as finely tuned instruments. In the end, that had been the only ace in their hand of cards life dealt to them. It was what had kept them alive so far. 

“Does this mean we get to come with you on supply runs from now on?” Sophie wondered lightly. Mia knew what she was doing – she was testing the water. Not with Shane, though. She knew he had really meant it when he’d told them they could stay. She was testing it with Mia. Seeing if the idea floated or sunk.

“I… fuck… yeah, sure.”

“Cool.” She shot her sister a look - a silent ‘ _we can do this’_ \- then bounded round to the front passenger side of the Jeep.

“I called shotgun,” Mia called after her.

“No, you didn’t!” Sophie sing-songed, then climbed into the Jeep and buckled her seatbelt expectantly.

Mia rolled her eyes.

“Fuckin’ whirlwind,” Shane muttered under his breath.

“You’re gonna have to get used to it,” Mia told him.

And didn't that just throw Shane for a fucking loop? 

He looked over to Sophie, who was looking at her sister with a smile that was timid yet shone brighter than the damn sun. She wanted to stay with him. _Him._

And between them stood Mia. The one and only person Sophie would follow till the end, then come back kicking and screaming if she got left behind. The other half to the single heart that made them whole. The reason Sophie would either stay or leave, even if she wanted the opposite.

Mia looked at her sister. Really, truly looked, and Shane saw how close she was to giving in. Oh, so close.  He wasn’t sure what he waiting for, not sure what to expect or what the outcome would be, but he wanted them to stay. Always had.

Glaziers meets dark aged whiskey as Mia tilted her head back and to the side, assessing him, watching him, dissecting him. Loose locks of chestnut fell from the ball cap. _His_ ball cap. 

Shane stood tall and proud without realizing. He straightened his back and set his jaw, showing her what he'd already said, wanting to show he could protect them.

Sophie watched, wide-eyed and nibbling on her lower lip. She wanted to stay, Mia knew that. Knew he was their best chance at surviving, that she owed Shane her fucking life and her sister’s. Knew they could make it out of this on top with Shane at the helm.

"No second chances."

She climbed into the backseat, griping and kicking the back of Sophie’s seat because she’d stolen shotgun position.

Shane stared at the jeep, driver’s door open in front of him, like his brain has been fried and his instincts were suddenly out of whack. 

They were staying.


	3. crushcrushcrush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sophie felt that warmth again which she hoped didn’t turn her cheeks pink.
> 
> This wasn’t some ridiculous school girl crush – far from it – so she hated the thought of acting like it was. They were both adults, after all.
> 
> This time, we follow Sophie's POV as she comes to terms with a few home truths, even as her sister refuses to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is 4AM but not a single fuck fuckity-fuck has been given! xx

Sophie wasn’t blind.

She also wasn’t stupid.

Or naïve.

She knew she didn’t stand a chance, that things wouldn’t work out the way she wanted them to.

She liked Shane.

It wasn’t about him being their savior, even though, yes - at first - that was what had drawn her to him. It wasn’t even about the fact he kept a roof over their heads and fed them. Those were wonderful aspects of him, she wouldn’t deny that, but that wasn’t why she found herself wanting to be close to him. To speak to him. To see him smile, which he rarely did.

She couldn’t really explain it, at least not to anyone else. Especially not her sister. She’d just laugh at her. She did laugh at her for it.

Sophie wasn’t drawn in by Shane’s sharp edges and tough lines or the alpha male side of him that kept them safe – that was just part and parcel of who he was. She already had Mia around to fill that role, and she did it so well it surprised Sophie that her sister and Shane hadn’t realized how similar they were in that way. Or maybe Mia had, and that was why she pretended she didn’t like him.

Instead, Sophie liked the softer side of Shane that came out when he let his guard down. It didn’t happen too often, but when it did? He could make her laugh and smile more than anyone had in a long time. He didn’t treat her like she would break at any moment, like she was a fragile, weak little girl.

He understood she could take care of herself, but wanted to help her anyway because he saw something in her that deserved to be cherished. And that made her feel worthy of something good, made her feel human and happy, like she was more than what happened to her. To them. He made her feel something other than worry or panic or shame, and that was everything she needed.

Yeah. She liked him a lot.

She hadn’t taken offence when he offered to teach the two of them how to clean and sharpen their weapons. He did it because he cared, in Shane’s own way, not because he wanted to belittle them. It was a skill they needed to practice and hone, despite how much Sophie knew her twin liked to think otherwise.

Mia was proving that fact right that very moment, in a way that was so typically… well, Mia.

Her sister sat across the room by the open door as they let the house air out in the early summer breeze, icy cold gaze settled on her task. A whet stone in one hand, and her favored eight-inch blade in the other.

Shane had only had to show her the process to sharpen her blade once before she’d taken the stone from him and expertly did it the first time. Mia was a quick study, but Sophie knew part of her sister’s determination to get it right was that she just didn't want to be in close proximity to Shane for longer than was needed.

Once she got it down, Sophie sensed her sister’s gaze shifted to Shane as he helped her with her own blade. She could see the underlying anger in her steel eyes as she watched her with Shane, saw how close they were sitting together, nearly huddled as they talked and sharpened the many blades Shane had acquired or hoarded since taking the cabin. Her sister was not happy about Sophie being close to Shane and so open with him. Sophie didn’t care.

Sophie laid her hand on Shane's forearm to catch his attention, having him check her work on the small knife. Shane openly touched his fingers to hers as he took the blade gently and tested it. 

"Good job, Darlin'." Shane beamed at her in that hard way he did, a twitch of a smile and his eyes proud of her for learning a new skill. He was always happy to teach her.

She felt her cheeks tinge pink, and then Shane acted strange. He leant forward an inch or two, closing in on her space, and Sophie froze at the increased closeness. His gaze flickered to her lips once.

Before either Shane or Sophie could act or realize what they were doing, there was a heavy thump and Shane jumped in his seat as a serrated blade sunk into the floor between his feet at least an inch into the floor. Mia booted feet were already out the door and into the yard by the time they’d processed what had happened. 

Sophie closed her eyes and let out a resigned sigh as she let herself lean forward just far enough to press her forehead to Shane’s temple. Shane turned his head back in her direction until their foreheads were touching instead, gaze meeting hers for just a second before darting down to her mouth, and Sophie felt her fist clench against his arm in frustration. Her sister had the worst timing. Or the best, depending on how you saw it.

“I’ll be right back,” she muttered.

She wrenched herself away from him and ran out the door after her sister.

“Hey!” she yelled. Mia had her back to her, arms folded as she tapped her foot against the grass, clearly waiting for Sophie to join her. “What the Hell was that?”

“‘ _What the Hell was that?_ ’” Mia whirled around and glared at her, that icy gaze directed right into her own green orbs. “What the Hell was _that?!”_

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sophie deflected, wanting to cross her arms like a petulant child.

“Bullshit,” Mia snapped. “You know exactly what I’m talking about. _That._ With _him.”_

“He was checking I’d done it right!”

“From six inches away?” Mia scoffed. “I have eyes, Sophie. I saw what he wanted to do. What he was _going_ to do.”

“And you just had to get in the way, didn’t you?” Sophie stepped forward, anger burning inside of her. “You couldn’t just mind your own busin-”

“It is my business!” Mia snapped. “Everything you do is!”

“Oh, for Christ’s sake, Mia! Can you hear yourself right now? You sound just like Mom!” That was a low blow and Sophie knew it, but was too frustrated to care.

Mia launched herself forward so quickly it startled Sophie into tripping over backwards, falling on her ass right onto the green grass. Her eyes widened in shock as Mia towered over her, right hand raised across her chest as if to backhand her own sister.

Sophie chuckled darkly. “You gonna act like her now, too?”

Mia stumbled back a few steps, fear gripping her eyes as she backed up a few more, ice fixed on emerald. She curled her hands against her sides as she wrapped her arms loosely over her abdomen. 

"You can't, Sophie... You can't!" Mia went from whispering to just an octave below yelling. "What if he hurts you like they did?!"

Sophie started to get up to comfort her twin, knowing she said the wrong thing about their mother, but Mia only backed away again, further out of reach. She could see how much Mia hated herself for what she almost did, and wanted to soothe her. 

"You can't Sophie.... He's...-"

“He’s not them,” Sophie said softly. “You know that, Mia. I know you do.”

“You sure about that?” Mia’s gaze hardened. “You thought that camp would be safe, too.”

That backhand to the face would have been kinder than those words.

Sophie felt her eyes well with tears. “You think I don’t already know that? That I’m the reason we- That they…”

Mia looked down at the ground. “That’s not what I meant.”

Mia raised a hand as if to reach for her, and this time it was Sophie’s turn to step away.

“Yeah, it is.” Sophie sighed. “I fucked up. All of what- what happened? That’s on me. I know that.”

“Soph…”

“Shane doesn’t scare you, Mia,” Sophie continued. “You do. You like him, too. You just don’t want to admit it.”

“Stop talking.”

“No.” Sophie stood up straighter. “No, you need to listen to me. I’m fed up with you treating Shane like shit all the time, like he’s the bad guy, plotting to hurt me. Or you. He’s not.”

Mia opened her mouth to protest.

“Don’t,” Sophie snapped. “You can’t stand to see him anywhere near me, and it’s not because you seriously think he’s gonna hurt me.”

Sophie forced herself to exhale a long, slow breath. Riling Mia up by saying something she wasn’t ready to hear yet would get her nowhere.

“I’m not asking you to like it,” she continued, tone softer. “Mia, I’m just asking you to not glare daggers at me every time I get within a five-foot radius of him. To not judge me for wanting… for wanting…”

“Him,” Mia finished for her.

Sophie nodded. “I don’t even know what that _want_ is... I just know that when I’m with him? I feel like myself again. When he’s close, I feel safe and warm and normal and, Mia… I _want_ him to touch me. I _like_ it when he does. I wouldn’t let him otherwise.

Mia stared at her. Evaluating. Thinking. Planning. This was what her sister did when faced with a problem. She was smart, calculating. Sophie stayed quiet.

A heavy sigh came through her nose and Mia nodded at her twin, scrubbing a hand over her face before wordlessly opening her arms for her sister. 

They wrapped their arms around each other tightly.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said you're like mom..."

Mia shook her head into Sophie's neck. Neither one wanted to get into that. Not ever.

"'M’sorry. It's not your fault about what happened to us."

Sophie only held her sister tighter. Mia blamed herself, no matter how wrong she was to do so.

"Just.. Please be careful." It was the best thing Sophie could expect from her sister right now. "Please..."

So she took it, nodded into her sister neck, and they held onto each other for endless minutes until the feeling of that rift stopped and they slipped back together like always. 

Sometimes, they fought like acts and dogs, but they always _always_ came back to each other. They knew one was only protecting the other, and that was exactly what was happening now. Mia was trying to protect Sophie from the enigma that was Shane Walsh. 

"I will," Sophie whispered as they broke apart. “Look, I don’t know if there’s even something there. It could be nothing. I just know I wanna find out.”

“There’s something,” Mia replied quietly, shooting a glance over Sophie’s shoulder at the cabin. “Just go slow.”

“I’m not gonna jump into bed with the guy,” Sophie mumbled. “I’m not… I don’t want that right now. Maybe not ever.”

“If he ever pushes you, you tell me,” Mia stressed. “Or if… if…”

“You’d be the first to know,” Sophie assured her. “I don’t think any of this works if we’re not a trio anyway.”

Mia frowned. “What?”

Sophie averted her gaze, cursing herself for saying too much. “Nothin’, I just meant… I can’t imagine not having you with me too.”

“Always,” Mia reminded her, but Sophie knew her sister. Knew she would be analyzing her slip up already.

She hadn’t meant to say that, not yet. Mia wasn’t in a place to truly understand it, or to even want it, but Sophie knew that anything she had with Shane would always need Mia as a third piece to work. Once her sister stopped fighting him at every turn, she’d realize how alike and how good for each other her and Shane were – they were both strong, boosted each other to a new level, and came from very similar places. Protectors. Survivors.

Sophie knew her sister needed someone to match her in that just as badly as she needed Sophie to be the softer one, the one who calmed her and grounded her and stopped her rages spiralling out of control. Sophie wasn’t timid or shy – she just knew when to speak up and when not to when it came to her sister. She liked being the one people opened up to, and people like Shane and Mia liked opening up to her.

They’d be good together, all three of them.

“Wanna go back inside?” Sophie suggested.

Mia nodded and followed Sophie as she made her way back inside, both of them fully expecting Shane to be sitting there awkwardly since they’d basically screamed at each other for the past forty minutes. 

Instead, he was sitting by the fireplace, watching a pot of beans heat up over the fire. When he looked up, those aged whiskey colored eyes were laced with worry. For her. He’d heard. Sophie smiled timidly at him as her sister stalked back over to the chair and picked up another blade, ignoring Sophie and Shane both. 

Sophie cautiously moved to sit on the floor near Shane, legs crossed and folded beneath her as she started picking gently at the frayed ends of her jeans. They were far too long for her shorter legs, and the ends drag under her boots. The jeans hung off her and made her seem so much smaller than she really was, much like the sweaters and men's muscle tank tops they both had to wear. Shane's clothes were just far too big for their smaller frames

"Should get you girls some clothes that actually fit ya," Shane said softly, gesturing with his fingers to where hers are tugging on the frayed ends. She was grateful for the smooth avoidance of the obvious, thankful he wasn’t making things awkward by asking about her fight with Mia. 

"That would be amazing,” Sophie replied. “Not that wearing your clothes isn't fine but…"

She found herself blushing and stumbling over her words. 

Shane smiled and nodded. It was one of those rare ones that actually reached his eyes, and Sophie could see that boyish charm he must have had as a teenager. She wondered for a second about how old Shane really might be. 

She’d have bet his mid-thirties, maybe. Old enough to have learned and experienced a lot, but still close enough to her age for them to have a lot in common. When his hair had been close shaven the first time they met, she’d have bet a lot older. Now, with it growing out a bit, his face looked softer somehow so she liked to think earlier thirties… She shook the thought off, because what did it matter anyway? Not like they really counted birthdays anymore.

Sophie tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, and Shane’s gaze flicked down to follow the movement before fixing on hers again. Sophie felt that warmth again, which she hoped didn’t turn her cheeks pink. This wasn’t some ridiculous school girl crush – far from it – so she hated the thought of acting like it was. They were both adults.

“We could go for a run?” Shane suggested. _Had he been that close before, or had he just moved there?_ “Try the next town over, see if there’s a thrift store or somethin’?”

“Y-Yeah,” Sophie agreed. She realized with a start that she’d been the one leaning towards him, while he’d kept somewhat of a reasonable distance this time. She leaned back onto her hands and stared at the fire, then sighed softly when Shane’s knee brushed against hers as he adjusted his position. “We should probably eat first, though.”

“They’re ready to go,” Shane replied, gesturing to the can of beans. “Was just keepin’ ‘em warm for when you… for when you came back.”

Sophie rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. She had no idea how much he’d heard, but knew he must have at least heard something. She just hoped it wasn’t anything too condemning. Her hand slipped to his knee for support as she uncurled her legs and pushed herself to her feet, an accidental gesture that had him staring up at her in that strange way again.

“I’ll go grab the plates,” she told him quietly, then headed over to the kitchen area to get them.

Mia raised an eyebrow as she passed, but didn’t say anything, just added her cleaned and sharpened blade to the pile in front of her like nothing had happened. Sophie was grateful.

She took three from the wash rack and grabbed some spoons before heading back over to Shane, who was now standing. She came to a stop beside him and offered him the plates and a spoon to dish up the beans with. He took them from her with a grateful smile, fingers lingering on hers as he did so.

“Take a seat with Mia. I’ll bring ‘em over.”

Sophie nodded, then brushed her hair behind her ear before turning to have a seat on the ratty old couch next to her sister’s chair.

Mia simply set the whet stone and machete down on the floor, folding her legs under her in that flexible way they both could. Sophie mirrored her sister without noticing, but Shane did. 

Whatever one of them did, the other always copied. And though Mia was the older twin and sort of alpha, when Sophie made her own decisions, Mia would follow suit as well. He liked it, the way they moved as a unit rather than two separate people.

He came over, handing Sophie her plate first, and their fingers touched at the exchange. Sophie started to curse herself for the heat in her cheeks, worried Shane would think she had some sort of savior complex for him and misread everything because of it.

"Thanks," Mia spoke up softly as she took the plate, shocking both Sophie and Shane to hear that word from her sister’s mouth. 

Mia rolled her eyes and ignored them both as Shane and Sophie locked eyes. Sophie shrugged her shoulders a bit and Shane shook his head slightly in shock. Sophie tried not to think about it too much - she was just happy her sister had listened to her this time and let up on him.

Shane settled on the other side of the couch, leaving the middle cushion between them, the one with the springs popping up out of the seat that were ready to pierce someone's thighs. For several minutes, the only sounds were the scraping of spoons on plates, then a gentle clunk as Mia handed a bottle of water to Sophie before Sophie then handed it to Shane.

He took a long sip, then offered it back. Sophie reached out to take it without looking up from her plate, and resisted the urge to smile down at her food as his fingers brushed hers again. She let her pinkie finger drag over his knuckles, but kept her eyes from straying and turned to Mia instead.

“Shane thought it might be a good idea if we tried the next town over today, see if we can find some actual decent clothes of our own?” she told her. “You in?”

Mia shrugged around her last mouthful of beans, then swallowed before mumbling, “You want me to be?”

Sophie met her sister’s gaze and nodded, appreciating the attempt to step back. It wasn’t her blessing, exactly, but it was enough. She was trying, but Sophie didn't want to be away from Mia anymore then Mia did.

“Three pairs of eyes are better than two,” Sophie pointed out. “Plus, I have no idea what size we’d even be anymore.”

They only had one mirror in the cabin, but they both avoided it like the plague. Seeing each other’s frail frame was enough to paint that horrific self-portrait. Sophie didn’t want to know what she’d looked like anyway, hadn’t wanted to see her reflection betray just how bad things had gotten. Maybe it’d be different now they weren’t just skin and bone like before. Maybe the reality wouldn’t be as repulsive as her expectations, if she could muster the courage to look when they went on their run.

“Sure,” Mia replied. She held her hand out for Sophie’s empty plate, then got to her feet and, in a move nobody could have ever expected, took Shane’s from him too before heading to the kitchen to wash up.

She glanced at the man beside her and laughed under her breath, taking in the way he’d twisted round almost painfully far to stare after her sister incredulously.

"The hell happened to her?" Shane mumbled under his breath, turning his head back round to raise an eyebrow at Sophie. She shrugged and stood up, trying to hide her small grin as she went to the weapons table and picked up a blade or two. 

Mia was already outside on the pretence of checking the gas in the Jeep. Giving them space. Sophie could see her sister from the open doorway, leaning against the rear end of the Jeep, arms crossed over her chest and a look of boredom and worry on her face under the faded ball cap of Shane's she'd taken as her own. Mia would never admit it, but she only wore it because it was Shane's. She hated ball caps and always had.

Sophie smiled to herself. 

"Let's go, Darlin’, we’re wastin’ daylight." Shane pushed gently on her lower back to coax her towards the door. She froze for a half second from the somewhat intimate and light touch, forcing her body not to shudder and give Shane the idea his touch scared her. It didn't. She liked it.

He was about to pull away until she turned her head just right, giving him a reassuring smile as she followed his little push and headed outside and into the Jeep. Mia didn’t even fight for shotgun position this time, and climbed into the back without comment.

Shane locked up the cabin then joined them inside, handing Sophie the blade that she had forgotten on the table. She took it from him gratefully, then lifted up the hem of his over-sized shirt to show him the other two she’d hidden in her waistband. He smirked at her, then started up the Jeep, heading west.

The town Shane had been thinking of was maybe twenty minutes out, but instead of the slightly tense silence they usually travelled in, Sophie filled the lull with her usual light-hearted attempts at conversation. It was slow going at first, with mainly Shane responding, but every once in a while Mia would contribute to the conversation, and that made something in Sophie's chest relax. She hadn't expected this, but she'd take it.

They scouted out the main street to make sure there were no surprises, then parked up outside an old thrift store before jumping out and heading to the front. 

Shane signalled he'd check the back, leaving the twins to tackle the front. It'd taken him a few weeks to finally relax enough to trust their judgement, but now he did it made all their lives so much easier. They could hold their own, and he finally believed that.

The twins gave each other an affirming nod, then carefully pushed open the door, Mia creeping in first with Sophie covering her back. There were three walkers wandering the aisles, but the twins barely even had to think about their movements before they'd dispatched them with ease.

The store was musty, but promising, and as soon as Shane shouted clear from the back office, they began to peruse the racks of clothes in hope of finding decent clothes that would actually fit them for once.

"Soph, try these," Mia called from the other side of the rack, holding up a pair of jeans.

Sophie smiled to herself and reached over to grab the garment, switching it for the pair of cargo pants she'd picked out with Mia in mind - always so in tune with each other, even with things like this.

Twenty minutes later, both girls had a sizable stack of jeans, shirts and underwear. Sophie didn’t even care if they still didn’t fit quite right – she was just happy she no longer had to wear oversized boxers and baggy men's jeans, even if they were Shane’s. 

He’d joined them minutes ago, picking out some things for himself as well since the girls had worn most of his out, but otherwise left them in peace to find what they wanted.

After hanging a few unnecessary items back on the rack, Mia grabbed up her basket of clothes and called out, "I’ll be right back, gonna start loading up." 

Shane nodded to her and Sophie tossed a blue camo hoodie into the basket, winking at her sister when Mia's eyes lit up a bit. She smiled gratefully, and then she was out the door. 

Shane silently moved closer, looking through the shelves of used blankets. Sophie watched him from the corner of her eyes until a spattering of color and lace caught her attention. Her feet took her to the dress rack instinctively, and her fingers touched the fabric longingly. 

It was a bohemian style sundress, a mosaic of blues and purples over a soft shade of pink. Lace made up the gentle capped sleeves and a band under the breast line. It was knee-length and flowing, something Sophie would have had in her closet and worn to class or out shopping. Maybe even to brunch with her twin.

Her hands pulled it from the rack without permission and held the hanger over her collarbone. Tears pricked her green eyes as she looked down at herself and let out a long sigh. She almost couldn’t bring herself to look at her reflection in the mirror, but then she did, and she only saw a shadow of who she used to be and it made the tears well up even more.

She was thin - too thin – still, but there was color to her cheeks. And then she looked at her bare arms which sprouted from the shirt she was wearing, cringing at how the scars riddling her flesh stood stark against her skin. The clothes she was wearing were baggy, which didn’t help either. They made her look and feel even smaller than ever. She had to look away, hastily shoving the dress back in the rack where she found it. 

“Wouldn’t have pegged you as wantin’ to wear that kinda thing,” Shane said from behind her. “Too girly.”

Sophie shrugged, unable to look at him. “Was stupid.”

“Something like this on the other hand…”

Sophie finally looked to her right and felt her mouth fall open slightly. Shane was holding up the pair of ripped black jeans and plum-colored sweater she’d picked out earlier, only to return to the rack because it was too form fitting and brave.

“This would suit ya ten times better.”

Sophie breathed out a soft laugh and reached out to touch the soft wool and tough denim longingly. There was no way he could have seen her pick it out – he was on the other side of the room when she’d seen it and she hadn’t even shown Mia the outfit. It’d been her own little secret wish.

“I ain’t no expert, but it’d go with them boots you picked out, maybe even that leather jacket?” It would have. That was why she’d liked it so much.

“Ain’t exactly got the body for it anymore,” Sophie mumbled wistfully, thumb running along the side of the fabric where her waist would have curved if she’d had one. The sleeves fell longer than was normal, which meant they’d even cover her hands slightly the way she loved. “Way too scrawny.”

“That’s bullshit,” Shane countered. “You got strong arms, toned legs from all that runnin’… you’d fill that out no sweat. It’d keep you warm, be easy to move in… More practical than that lace shit any day.”

Sophie looked up at him and saw his eyebrow quirk upwards as he held them out expectantly.

“Go on,” he encouraged. “Try ‘em. I won’t peek.”

She knew he wouldn’t. He never would.

She took the clothes from him and quickly stripped out of his old ill-fitting items, barely shivering at the cold before hastily pulling on the jeans and sweater before she could chicken out. They were as comfy as she’d hoped, but didn’t hang off her like she’d dreaded.

She found herself in front of the mirror within seconds and stared at her reflection.

“Told ya,” Shane said softly as he came to stand behind her. His hands moved as if to reach for her hips, but he let them fall back to his sides and clenched his fists instead.

Sophie nodded numbly, taking in how her body looked now it was in something better fitting. Her arms did look strong instead of stick-like, just like he’d said, and if she turned just right, she had something resembling a waist instead of being straight up and down like a boy. 

She felt a lump rise in her throat as her gaze travelled down to her legs, which were still skinnier than she’d liked, but they didn’t look weak, not by any means. She even had hips, kind of, though they were more slimmed down than she was used to.

She reached up and pulled her hair free of its practical ponytail, sending her dark hair tumbling messily around her. A shocked laugh escaped her as she stared into her own eyes through the mirror. She looked like a woman.

“Yeah,” he said softly. Sophie turned to face him, and saw how his proud smile met his eyes again. “That’s better.”

Sophie returned his smile with one of her own and let her hands find his waist, not pulling him closer but not letting him move away either. His fingers came up to tuck her hair behind her ear, expression turning fond.

“Hey there." he murmured.

“Hi,” she whispered.

Eyes locked on hers, he slowly leaned in until his forehead was pressed against hers. Sophie felt her breathing hitch in response to the closeness, for all the right reasons. He broke her gaze to look at her mouth again, and she knew what he wanted. Knew he wouldn’t do it without her permission.

“Darlin’…” he breathed. “Don't wanna push y-"

She pushed herself up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his.

The kiss was sweet and over much quicker than she’d have liked, but it made her heart race and warmth spread through her body like wildfire anyway. It felt _good._

His eyes met hers, searching for any sign of discomfort, and she couldn’t help but smile as she slowly leaned in again. He closed the distance between them with another kiss, longer than the last and a little firmer, more sure instead of hesitant. His hands came up to splay against her back, and Sophie’s curled against his waist to pull him closer as she closed her eyes.

“SHANE!”

They both moved simultaneously. Shane ran to the dirty glass door, then motioned for Sophie to stay back as he peeked out. There were other voices, other footsteps. Sophie couldn't see what was going on from her position behind him, but she saw the anger that flashed across Shane’s face and it made her move forward a little further.

Her heart stopped. 

Mia was caught in a choke hold, her arms pinned to her sides by the other arm of the man holding her. Tears were free flowing down her cheeks, and her eyes were wide with terror. She wasn't even trying to resist, just trembling in the man's grip as another came up to grope at her.

And Sophie couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t-

"Stay put!" Shane hissed, then burst through the door, the single pistol on him cocked and ready, pointing at the man holding Mia. 

"SHA-"

The elbow over Mia’s throat tightened and she gagged, gasping for breath. 

"Put her down. NOW."

There were four of them. They were big and burly, and she could smell them from feet away. Scraggly beards and greasy locks of hair in their faces. Brutes. Sophie knew that breed of monster when she saw it. 

They were hurting her sister. Scaring her senseless.

Her _sister._

_They’d checked the street! They were alone..._

 "Says who? She yours?"

One of the monsters brandished a machete, but the others had nothing but crowbars or metal pipes. That meant they didn't have firearms. But they were still a threat, their mere presence making her mind scream DANGER.

The click of Shane flicking the safety off his pistol was all it took.

“MIA!” she screamed as she sprinted out the door, knife thrown and plunging into the head of the asshole choking her sister before he had a chance to even realize she was there.

Everything happened too quickly after that for her to react on anything except instinct. She saw Mia drop from the man’s hold, but then a fist knocked her sideways and she was punching and kicking and all out brawling with one of the other men. She wrestled out of his hold, the adrenaline pumping through her veins giving her the strength she needed to grab for the crowbar her attacker had dropped and slam it into his skull over and over again. 

Shane’s gun clattered to the ground beside her, but before she could grab it she heard Mia shriek in terror and turned to see Shane grab the third man’s jaw and head, snapping his neck with deadly efficiency while the fourth man tried to sneak up behind him. 

Towards Mia.

Shane turned just in time to grab at her sister’s would-be murderer, but then a trigger was pulled and blood spattered over Shane’s face as the body tumbled to the ground. It took Sophie several seconds to register it had been her fingers to pull that trigger. 

She looked over to her sister, whole body shaking violently, and saw how Mia was clinging onto Shane like her life depended on it, openly sobbing and whimpering as her nails threatened to rip his shirt.

Shane turned to wrap Mia in his arms, and Sophie saw the fear in his eyes, the utter relief that her sister was okay. Mia was okay.

Sophie let out a shuddered breath, the panic of the moment hitting her at once, but then she heard the low groan of a nearby walker and pushed herself to her feet, hands slipping in gore and blood.

“Shane,” she croaked. “Shane, we gotta go. There’s walkers.”

She half-staggered towards them, only for Mia to flinch away from the sound of her footsteps and cower against Shane’s body. Sophie swallowed hard as she caught Shane’s gaze, then gestured towards the Jeep.

“Get in the back with her,” she instructed. “I’ll drive.”

Shane nodded in understanding and tossed her the keys before carefully guiding Mia towards the car. Sophie could hear her sister’s moans and whimpers even as she climbed into the front seat and closed the door, and it made her heart break.

She should’ve stopped it, should never have let her go out alone like that, shouldn’t have-

Memories flashed like a brutal film inside her head of the last time she’d heard those awful sounds from her sister’s lips. The pleading. The pain. The trauma. Her fingers shook as she fumbled to slot the key in the ignition.

Shane opened the passenger door and eased himself inside, only for Mia to all but crawl into his lap and bury her face in his neck. Sophie met his gaze in the rear-view mirror and nodded before slamming the Jeep into reverse and tearing away from the thrift store.

Sophie drove. She barely remembered the way back, but her eyes kept flicking back and forth from the road to the rear-view mirror. Mia's form was trembling, sprawled across Shane's lap. 

Her twin’s usual icy gaze was glazed over, wide and fearful and flickering at anything and everything, like she couldn't focus on any one thing. Her thin fingers clutched to Shane's upper arms, nails making half-moon shapes in his strong flesh. 

"Mia, it's okay. We're going home," Sophie soothed. Her sister gave no response in the slightest, just a frozen body clinging to Shane's side.

"Shane..." 

"Shit, I think she's goin’ into shock," he half-growled, half-whispered as he pulled Mia closer to his chest. When he let her head rest above his heart, Sophie's grip on the wheel tightened. 

She knew that wouldn't work, what Shane was doing. Listening to a heartbeat only made Mia panic more when it was tried. She knew as much, because since the day they were born the only thing to calm her sister was when they touched foreheads. In the crib and before that in the womb.

Her eyes went back to road, taking a right turn a bit too sharply and sending the baskets of clothes in the back toppling over. Mia whimpered at the movement, and it made Sophie’s heart constrict painfully.

"Shane, you- you have to do the thing."

At his confused expression, she sighed and raised a dirty hand to point at her forehead. 

Shane nodded, but as he went to move Mia she sobbed and scrambled right back to where she had been. Sophie hated it that Mia was so terrified right now. Guilt rose up in her chest as she watched her sister start to cry again. This was her fault... 

"Come on, sweetheart. You're okay," Shane whispered softly, and Sophie caught a glimpse of him using his strength to pull Mia from her spot and up higher against his chest and side. 

His hand reached up and cupped her sister’s jaw, making her look up so Shane could look down and press his forehead to hers. Mia gave a heavy shuddering breath at the touch, then sagged into his arms before finally going limp, the tension leaving her body within seconds

"S’alright, I got’cha," Shane whispered, and Sophie could hear the fear and relief in his voice as he spoke to her twin. Her heart constricted again at flashes of a dark freezer and the sounds of her sister’s screams flooding her ears and mind. 

"We're almost home," Sophie whispered to Shane.

He didn’t hear her, too focused on soothing Mia, but Sophie didn’t care. She could see how Mia was reacting to him, how her shudders were slowing to gentle trembles as his voice flowed over her and calmed her down bit by bit.

“You’re okay… Good girl… You’re safe… I got’cha…”

Sophie wiped a tear from her cheek as she struggled to keep the Jeep on track, taking the next corner too harshly as well and almost skidding off the road. Shane hissed in response to the sudden jolt, shooting her a worried glance, but Sophie couldn’t make her mouth work anymore, couldn’t apologize or voice her concern for Mia.

They had her, and they were going to hurt her, and Sophie… Sophie did nothing, she was tied up, she couldn’t move, could only watch as-

The cabin came into view, but Sophie only accelerated harder, desperate to get there. She slammed the brakes on as soon as they reached the front yard, and the Jeep lurched to a stop right by the door.

“Get her inside,” she managed to force out. “Lie down with her, get her warm, and _do not_ stop with the forehead thing or you’ll lose her.”

“Soph-”

“Just do it!” she snapped.

Shane looked at her worriedly, then did as she bid anyway and hauled Mia out the Jeep and through the front door without any further hesitation.

As soon as they were out of sight, Sophie’s head fell to rest on the steering wheel with a thud, right between her clenched hands. She let out a loud sob, face scrunching in pain as everything hit her at once.

They’d almost killed Mia. They’d almost… They’d almost…

“They’re dead,” she whimpered. “They’re dead. They’re dead. You killed them. She’s okay. She’s okay.”

She repeated her mantra over and over, clinging onto the steering wheel like it was the only thing grounding her in the present instead of letting her spiral into her memories. She forced her eyes to open, to look at the dark jeans and purple sweater, fingers flexing against leather. Dark jeans. Mia was okay. Purple sweater. She’d stopped them. Dark jeans. Mia was okay. Purple sweater. She’d stopped them.

She inhaled a harsh breath, then exhaled slowly. Inhaled. Exhaled.

With shaking hands, she opened the Jeep door and headed to the rear to get the clothes. She pushed the items that had scattered back into their baskets and heaved them up out of the trunk. Her arms protested against the weight, but she managed to carry them to the front door somehow, and lock the Jeep behind her.

She quietly slipped inside the cabin, bringing the baskets in behind her, and froze at the sight that greeted her.

Shane had Mia in his lap, her small form bundled and curled in a blanket against him. Her fingers curled into fists into his shirt, stretching the fabric near tipping point as she clung to him. His large hands were splayed over her back to keep her close as he whispered soft, kind words to her.

"It's okay now... We're home, sweetheart... Not gonna let nothin happen to you..." 

His voice was so sure, so deep with emotion, that it made Sophie shrink back. She felt as if she was intruding on a private moment, but then Shane looked up at her, still keeping his forehead pressed to Mia's. 

"There's your sister... She's okay, too... Both’a ya are okay..." He kept his voice going, soothing, then motioned for Sophie to come over with his hand.

The door clicked shut behind her as Sophie knelt by the chair Shane sat in with her sister. Her hands hesitantly reached out, and Mia only flicked her eyes to her green ones before closing them again. She didn't push Sophie away this time in fear - she was calming down. 

Sophie could feel the fear and turmoil in her sister as if it were her own. Twin empathy may have been a thing of fairy tales, but it wasn’t to those who could actually feel it. Like Sophie and Mia.

She could feel everything in this moment. They’d lived it before, just days after Shane had found them. The staggering relief had flowed back and forth from one to the other as they realized they were safe. 

Mia's grip didn't loosen or move as Sophie gently rubbed soothingly against her sister’s thigh. Her head leaned against Mia's knee as Shane kept talking to her, and bit by bit they calmed the panicked twin together.

And then it was like a firework had gone off, one of the ones with a really long fuse. The kind that you wait and wait for and then when they finally do go off, you're so shocked by it you jump back.

Mia nuzzled into Shane's neck and took a deep shuddering breath. Sophie looked up the exact moment Mia realized what she had done. Her sister let out a scratchy screech and fell off of Shane's lap, blanket tangled around her legs as she scrambled back.

It wasn't fear in Mia's eyes as she nearly ripped the blanket in half to get out from it. Sophie didn't know what it was. 

Before she could get to her feet Mia had got to hers and ran down the hall away from them, the slam of the bedroom door echoing through the small cabin. 

“Mia!”

Sophie staggered after her sister, only to find the bedroom door locked and hear the sound of her sister feebly trying to push something in front of it.

“Mia!” she tried, knocking urgently on the door. “Mia, let me in!”

“NO!” Mia screeched, and it was enough to make Sophie stumble back in shock at the violence behind it.

She had no idea what had done this. This wasn’t about what happened, this was…

Sophie closed her eyes and replayed what little she could remember about what had happened outside the store in her head. 

Mia had run straight to Shane, sought him out as her savior, not Sophie, and cowered behind him, taken strength from him, had touched him, let him comfort her… and Mia had no idea how to comprehend that as a good thing instead of a sign of weakness or a lapse in judgement.

She couldn’t accept what had happened as anything other than a result of shock or horror, and she probably hated the fact Shane had been there for her when she needed him. Probably couldn’t stand knowing he’d seen her like that, and that she’d been the one to go to him, not the other way round. Sophie knew that would be what was running through her sister’s mind, because it was exactly what had happened that first night he’d found her. 

Hell, she’d felt some of that herself, before the gratitude and relief kicked in.

There was nothing she could do for her sister now except wait for her to figure things out for herself.

With a heavy, exhausted sigh, Sophie moved away from the door and padded back down the hallway to where Shane was standing by the fire, looking ready to run toward the bedroom with her.

“Is she-”

Sophie held up a hand and shook her head wearily. “Best to leave her, now.”

Shane ran his fingers through his hair and started pacing in front of the flames, his boots scuffing along the wooden floor as he did so.

“How did… How-”

“That wasn’t your fault,” Sophie mumbled. “You couldn’t have known.”

“Fuck!” Shane snarled. Sophie didn't even flinch. This rage was a part of Shane, just like the rage inside her sister whenever someone she loved was threatened.

“Shane…” Sophie stepped forward tiredly, reaching out to still him. “Shane, stop.”

Shane froze, muscles tense and furious gaze fixed on the wall, but he didn’t resist when Sophie coaxed his body to turn towards her.

“Look at me,” she murmured. He did so reluctantly, but couldn’t hold her gaze for long. “That’s not your fault. You did good. You helped her. Thank you.”

“Are you… Are you okay?” he grunted out.

Sophie gave him a weak half-smile. “She’s okay. We saved her. I’m good.”

Shane nodded, then huffed out a breath, suddenly looking just as tired as she felt.

“C’mon.” She took his hand in hers and guided him towards the couch.

She let him settle in the far corner before climbing onto his lap with her legs stretched sideways across the couch, narrowly avoiding the dangerous spring in the middle. He wrapped his arms around her and held her close to his chest, fingers trailing patterns along her arms as she rested her head on his shoulder.

“It’ll get better,” she said softly after several minutes of listening to the fire crackle. “She’ll get better. She just needs more time.”

Shane pressed his lips to the top of her head in silent understanding - a promise to be patient. Sophie tilted her head up and kissed him softly, just once, then let her cheek rest against his shoulder again while they both waited for Mia to emerge from the bedroom.

Sophie knew this was going to be an important turning point for all of them, knew with more certainty than ever before that this trio would work because of it. The proof was right there. Shane could handle them both, despite how different they were, and each of them could connect with separate parts of him without there being a conflict. Mia was almost able to see it – that’s what had spooked her – and now she just needed to realize that she could have it, if only she’d let herself.

Until then, Sophie would just have to wait. If she got to do it nestled into Shane's arms, she'd oblige without complaint.


	4. Miracle (it might save you)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'm teaching you to fight. Both of you."
> 
> "What?" Her hands froze.
> 
> "What happened yesterday? It ain't ever gonna happen again, Mia."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting closer and closer to that first chapter, and hope you're just as excited as we are!
> 
> Comments are everything <3

“It’s been almost an hour.”

“I know.”

“Do you think she…”

Sophie let out a soft sigh and burrowed her face into Shane’s neck. “I don’t know.”

“Sorry,” Shane muttered. “Not tryna interrogate ya.”

“Cop trait,” Sophie tried to joke, but it fell a little flat with her worry.

There was still no sign of Mia. No movement from the bedroom, or any noise to alert them one way or the other. Sophie knew she wouldn’t be asleep, no way. She was probably sitting on the floor or on the bed with her knees drawn to her chest as she tried to process everything that had happened, as well as how she felt about it all. Mia always had to think about things like that, isolate herself so nobody could get in the way.

Shane’s focus was torn between the girl in the bedroom and the one on his lap. He was rattled, but trying to hold it together. The unadulterated rage that had hit him like a sucker-punch to the gut when he’d seen those monsters holding Mia was unlike anything he’d ever felt before. 

Words couldn’t describe it. And then, cradling her in his arms on that drive home, pressing his forehead to hers and having her nails dig into him as she whimpered and cried? All that red-hot anger turned into pure worry and desperation as he tried to bring her back from the brink.

Then there was Sophie to worry about too, wasn’t there? One second, he was finally getting to kiss her the way he’d dreamed about for so long as she pressed herself against him, then all Hell broke loose and her tiny body threw itself into the fray to save her sister. He’d seen how violently her hands had shaken after she fired that gun,  how terrified she was to have witnessed her sister experience more abuse at the hands of monsters who didn’t deserve to walk the Earth. He wouldn’t have been surprised if she’d fallen apart, but instead she was in his arms and keeping him calm.

“I know we should talk about things,” Sophie said softly, drawing him back from his thoughts. “And we will. But for now, just know that I’m glad that… that that kiss happened.”

Shane let his eyes fall shut. He hadn’t realized how much he’d needed to hear her say that. “Me too.”

“When she comes out, we gotta let her come to us,” Sophie murmured. She knew he’d probably already figured that out, but wanted to say it anyway to make sure. “I have no idea what she’s-”

The bedroom door unlocked with a loud click.

Sophie sat up from Shane's lap, moving to the arm of the couch instead. Soft footsteps came from down the short hall, Mia's socked feet appearing before the rest of her. Her hair was tangled and frizzy as if she'd been constantly ruffling it in her fist for the last near hour, cheeks pink and tear-streaked and her eyes red-rimmed and puffy.

"Sophie..." 

Sophie stood and walked toward her twin, but Mia flinched at the sight of her and turned her face away. She wrapped her arms about herself, honestly not wanting her sister’s comfort this time. She wanted the man on the couch, and she hated herself for that. 

Mia took a deep breath, then grabbed Sophie's hand and guided her toward the bedroom.  Once inside, the door clicked shut again, and Mia crumpled to the floor behind it, face in her hands as she sobbed against her sister’s legs. 

"Shhh… Hey, I'm right here." Sophie moved to the floor and pulled Mia's form into her chest, rubbing circles against her back as the older twin heaved sobs.

Mia couldn't even form words as she cried against her sister’s chest. She just clutched to her twin as emotion after emotion rolled through her, tormenting her into insanity.

She had been terrified of those men. She’d frozen, unable to think to kick out or punch or even bite. The fight had been literally beat out of her for so long, she couldn't do anything to save herself. So she'd run to Shane... Clung to him like her life had depended on his strength. He'd held her tenderly and calmed her mind from the brink of a meltdown of all meltdowns. 

He had been so fucking gentle with her...

Mia didn't know how to cope with the feelings inside of her now. She’d _wanted_ to run to Shane.  And she had.

It made her feel weak, and weakness was something she couldn't afford in this new world. Hiding behind Shane meant she trusted him, and she didn't want to trust a man to protect her or keep her safe. Yet, he’d done just that. He’d protected her, gone out guns blazing and broke a man's neck for daring to even look at her.

Something had stirred deep inside of her, making her hungry... wanting… at the sound of snapping bones and bullets firing, all to protect her. 

Shane had kept her safe. Calmed her down. Fucking held her like she was spun glass, delicate and fragile, and she hated it because she wasn't weak. Yet there she had been, wrapped in his arms and clutching to his shirt for dear life. 

She'd nuzzled into him. He’d smelt like Irish spring and sweat and menthol cigarettes.

Fuck...

"Sophie, I can't... " she sobbed.

Sophie only held her tighter. She could hear Shane's pacing boots in the main room, how his feet paused every time Mia sobbed loud enough for him to hear. Being out there was killing him.

"Shhhh…" 

"I can't ..."

"Yes you can.” Sophie closed her eyes and pressed her forehead to Mia's.

“I’m not- how do I- I-”

“It’s okay,” Sophie breathed. “It’s okay. I know. I know.”

Mia whimpered, wishing it was a different forehead against hers, and she hated herself for it. Sophie was her rock, she’d helped save her, and yet… suddenly it wasn’t enough.

“It’s not me you need right now,” Sophie whispered. “You need _him_.”

“No,” Mia protested. “No, I don’t, I-”

“Mia,” her sister sighed, pulling back to look into her eyes. “It’s okay. I understand.”

Mia clung tighter to her twin, unable to lie to her face about it. Not when they both knew exactly what she needed and why.

“This doesn’t make you weak,” Sophie soothed. Mia sobbed harder, hating how well her sister knew what she was thinking. “This makes you strong.”

Mia shook her head angrily. “How?”

“I know it doesn’t feel like it, but asking him for help? That’s everything, Mia,” Sophie replied. “It means you’re healing.”

It didn’t feel that way, not to Mia. To her it was like admitting defeat, like finally hanging her head in shame and crawling to someone for shelter from a shit-storm she created all by herself. Sophie should have been enough. Sophie _used_ to be enough. But all she wanted was Shane, to feel his arms shield her and stop her from falling.

“You just have to say it,” Sophie murmured. “Just say the word, and I’ll get him right now.”

Mia sat for long moments against her sister, turning what Sophie had said over and over in her head. Her shuddering breath was answer enough for her twin and herself, but Sophie wanted to hear her say it.

"Please... I need..." Mia didn't want this. Didn't want him. But... 

"Okay. I'll be right back." Sophie slowly disentangled her body from her twin’s and watched as Mia moved to lean her shoulder against the bed and bury her face into the side of it, wanting to hide her weakness. Sophie's heart broke.

Out in the main room, the fire was just embers, lighting up Shane's body like a bloody, flickering glow. His shoulders were hunched and his head was hanging low, arms outstretched to grip the mantle as he leaned heavily on it. He looked lost, and felt it deep in his bones. He wanted to be in there, to be with Mia and help her in any way he can. Sophie could see it. 

"Shane," she whispers and it was like he was shocked with a cattle prod.

He jumped up, stumbling back slightly as his head wrenched to the side, eyes wide. 

"Is she..." 

Sophie took a soft breath and smiled just barely. "She needs you." 

Shane stood there dumbfounded, his gaze shifting to the darkening hall like he wanted to move. He just didn't know how.  

"What do I..." 

"Shane?" Sophie placed her hand on his bicep and squeezed gently in reassurance. "Just hold her tight. She needs you. She just doesn't know how to ask." 

Shane took a step forward but stopped and scrubbed his hands over his dark curling locks, fingers entwined in the strands as if to pull them out. He didn't know what to do. 

He wanted to hold her, hold them both. Some deep primal need inside of him wanted to make sure they were always happy and healthy. He had their health under wraps, but their happiness was lost on him and he desperately wanted to fix it.

"Go Shane." Sophie presses at his lower back, kisses his cheek. "Go"

He hesitated, looking completely helpless, and Sophie cupped his face in her hands, forcing him to meet her gaze.

“Shane, you can do this,” she told him, leaving no room for argument. “Mia wants you in there, but you have to be the one to go to her or she’s gonna spiral and I won’t be able to fix it. Only you can.”

Shane’s head jerked in her hold in a semblance of a nod, and Sophie pushed herself onto her tiptoes to kiss his lips firmly, willing him to do what she couldn’t. 

“Go.”

He pressed his forehead to hers, completing that triangle of comfort they all needed with a single gesture, then hurried down the hall, his footsteps clumsy but urgent.

Sophie watched him go with a mixture of longing and sadness, gratitude and regret. She wished it hadn’t taken something like this to break down the barrier between her sister and Shane – she’d never wanted it to be a consequence of such a trauma for Mia. 

But maybe that’s what it would always have taken. Maybe something momentous was the only way to make Mia see what was right in front of her and bust open the floodgates she’d built to protect herself from more pain.

That was the only even remotely positive thing that could come out of this situation, so that was what she focused on instead of her heavy heart and terrified soul. The attack had shaken her up, too, but that didn’t matter, not when Mia was the one in the middle, when her sister was finally opening up to someone other than her. She was glad it was Shane. She knew he’d never hurt her, deliberately or otherwise. His kindred spirit would help heal Mia’s, whether they realized it or not.

When Shane reached the door, he glanced back at her for reassurance, hesitant fist raised to knock on the wood. She nodded and smiled as encouragingly as she could, and Shane let himself believe he could do this as much as she did.

He knocked hesitantly, but didn’t wait for a reply before carefully opening the door and stepping inside.

“Mia?”

No response came, so he stepped further into the darkened bedroom and saw her crumpled form against the side of the mattress. She was still crying, tears dripping down her chin as her hands curled into her own biceps, nails digging harshly into flesh. It made her seem so small.

"Mia?"

His voice sounded again, bringing her out of the pit of her mind a bit. Her head whipped round to face him and he could see just how lost she was by the look in her eyes. There were tangled stands of her hair in her face, clinging to her cheeks and neck. 

"Shane?" Her voice destroyed him then and there. It was barely whispered, a plea, a sob, a soft cry for help. For him.

He crouched down slowly, wanting to pick her up but not wanting her to be afraid of his frame. She didn't fight it, simply let his arm cradle her back while the other curled under her knees, picking her up to rest against his chest as he stood. 

"Shhh." His voice was soothing as she started to weep, choking softly in little gasps for breath as her fingers curled into his shirt. He moved, settling against the headboard with Mia wrapped in his arms, his knees coming up to cradle her to him. "I got’cha, honey..." 

Shane had no idea how to navigate right now. It felt like some metaphorical wheel had torn off and his foot was stuck the gas, speeding him forward even though he wanted to brake, but when he was holding her it made that gas pedal come up, slowing everything down again.

She was clinging to him like she had earlier, but this time she was doing it all on her own, desperately trying to forget every single reason why she shouldn't be there in his arms. She wanted nothing more than to wake up and find out this whole thing was a dream.

"I got’cha." He rubbed her upper arms, then realized she was freezing cold despite the early summer heat. He pulled the sheets over her, but got no response. Her eyes were closed tight, but her tears had stopped and her breathing had started to calm from its racking sobs.

He held her for endless moments, minutes, maybe hours. Then, when the tears had dried and her breathing slowed, Shane tried something. His rough fingers tilted her chin up towards, and although her eyes stayed closed, she didn't resist his touch and actually leaned into it instead, even if only a tiny bit.

"Look at me, baby." He shocked himself by calling her that, but he kept going instead of overthinking it. "Come on, now. Don't hide from me."

She opened them and melting ice stared back at him, unblinking. They were filled with fear, self-loathing and plain exhaustion.

"I don't want... I don’t want to need you," she whispered, and he nodded, knowing what she was trying to say. 

"I know."

"I don’t-... I'm not weak."

"Course not." His thumb wiped a stray tear off her cheek. "Never once thought that."

She went to try and say more but he stopped her by gently shushing her, his thumb running over the corner of her lips again as he stroked her cheek. 

"I’ll be here whenever you need me. _Every_ time you need me. I won't judge ya or complain or make fun of you for wanting or needing." _Me_ gets left unsaid.

She opened her mouth to speak, but her throat cracked and she let it snap shut again. That was exactly what she’d needed to hear. Didn't even know it until then, but it was true. It brought forth a new wave of tears. Her arms slipped up to curl over his shoulder and neck as her face buried itself in his neck, taking in his scent. Breathing him in. His strength. Everything.

His fingers carded through her chestnut colored hair, gently taking out the tangles and smoothing the loose curls over her shoulder to clear down her back. His lips found their way to her temple for a gentle kiss, and he realized she'd passed out in his arm. 

He wasn’t sure what to do then - leave her to sleep and get her sister to lay with her, or stay and hold her tight through the night. Again, he didn't want to leave her, but Sophie shouldn't have been left alone out there either. 

Luckily, he didn't have to make that choice.

There was a gentle knock at the door, and then Sophie's head popped into the room. She looked anxious, but not as concerned as Shane had expected. She gave him a relieved, proud smile which told him why she was so calm. She'd trusted he could help Mia and never doubted him.

Sophie carefully shut the door behind her, then quietly padded across the floor towards the bed. Mia didn't stir, and Sophie was grateful for that. It meant her sister was finally getting the rest she so desperately needed.

Shane had his arms around her, cradling her to him, and Sophie felt the tightness in her chest ease at the sight of them together. It was what she'd wanted all along, for those two to finally acknowledge the bond between the them.

Mia would be down for the count the rest of the night now, so Sophie crouched down to undo her boots before standing up and undoing her jeans, though she didn't take them off. She saw Shane eye her warily as she climbed onto the opposite side of the bed, and tried to send him a reassuring smile as she fluffed up a pillow and shifted across towards him.

"Ease her down," she whispered. "She won't wake up now, not for anything."

Mia's grip was so tight on his shirt that Sophie had to unpeel her sister's fingers before the two of them could gently lay her down on the sheets. Shane's hands hovered over her anxiously, like he was expecting some kind of reaction, but the girl just burrowed her face into the pillow and sighed softly, still fast asleep.

"She doesn't sleep this soundly unless she feels really safe," Sophie murmured, catching Shane's gaze. "You did a good job."

"Think you can take it from here," Shane replied, rubbing a hand over his hair.

Sophie's gentle hand reached out to touch his bicep, stilling him before he could move away.

"I think the three of us should stick together. Don't you?"

Shane considered that for a moment, hearing her unspoken meaning loud and clear. She wanted the three of them to be a team, and didn't mind that he cared about Mia as much as he cared about her. She approved. And he didn't know what to do with that.

"Are you sure?" he asked, voice gruff.

"There's room for us all," Sophie replied, and she didn't just mean in the bed.

Shane swung his legs over the edge of the bed and bent down to start lacing his boots. He paused for a moment before standing.

"Be right back."

Sophie realized what he was doing when she heard the scrape of the couch being dragged over the wooden floor. He was barricading the front door, and then his boots moved over the floorboards as he checked the windows in the other room. He was staying the night, securing the place since none of them would be on watch.

When he came back, his boots were gone and he was in sweatpants. Even though his shirt was still on, it did nothing to hide to muscles that were taut under the fabric. He looked to the bed where Sophie was curled up against her sister, not knowing where to go. 

The space beside Mia was empty, but Shane felt nervous for the first time in a long ass while. He wanted to be there beside Mia with Sophie in reach, but was scared to ask for it. Scared they might reject him.

"Shane, come on. It's late," Sophie whispered, raising her head so her green eyes could look at him in the shadows.

Shane swallowed. 

He climbed under the sheet and rolled onto his side, toward the sisters. Mia had moved in her sleep to face him, her back to Sophie, who was curled against her with her arm wound around her sister’s side.

Sophie spoke to him softly from over her sister’s shoulder. "It's okay."

He moved carefully, settling just an inch away from Mia's sleeping form. He didn't hesitate this time, sliding his arm over them both and letting his fingers press gently against Sophie's lower back. 

A sense of calm and relief came over Shane and he sighed deeply through his nose. He opened his eyes as Mia moved closer to him in her sleep, and watched as Sophie gave him a knowing glance before she laid her head back down and closed her eyes.

He knew that, come morning, Mia could and probably would lash out at him for holding her while she slept, but for now he would hold his girls as they slept and keep them safe.  

Huh, what a thought.

_His girls..._

Earlier, when that man had asked who Mia belonged to, Shane had instantly wanted to say he did. But these two couldn't be owned and never would be. They were free spirits, wild and untameable. And yet, he wanted them to be his. 

God, he sounded like a damn fool for wanting anything for himself. He'd never gotten what he wanted in his whole life. Rick got the sheriff’s position. Rick got the wife and kid. Rick had the nice house and got the good shifts at work. Rick got this. Rick got that. Everything that Shane had ever wanted. Even Shane's own baby. 

Shane reflexively pressed against Sophie's back to pull them both closer to him. Sophie was already half-asleep, humming softly as her hand left her sister’s stomach to splay over his hip.

She was like the calm before a storm, always there and always steady, whereas Mia was the storm itself, beating down and wreaking havoc with her fierce energy. He needed that contrast, needed Mia to spur his own fire and Sophie to soothe the burn. Kissing her head been… beyond anything he’d expected.

It made no sense, that she wanted to be that close to him. Someone like her should have run a mile in the opposite direction instead of towards him, and yet she seemed determined to hold onto him tightly with both her hands and never let go. Part of him wondered if being around Mia was what made her so different to the other women that had been a part of his life – that sisterly bond must have helped forge her inner strength and resilience, same way it had taught Mia how to let her hard exterior soften just enough to let people in when they’d earned it.

He’d never dared to imagine that either one of them would ever truly want to be around him, even with Sophie’s increased affections lately, yet in the space of a few hours, Sophie had kissed him and Mia had finally opened up about what was going on in her head.

It made no sense, yet somehow was perfectly clear.

He could never tame them – if anything, they were the ones that tamed him. No woman had ever been able to do that before, nor had he wanted them to. Lori was proof of that. She’d tried to, tried to dig her claws in but all that did was fuck with his mind to the point of insanity and make her lose control entirely. Maybe that was why he needed and wanted both of them at the same time, because they balanced both his light and his darkness instead of confining him to one or the other.

“Shane,” Sophie mumbled sleepily, curling her fingers in the waistband of his sweatpants. A tether, even in her slumber.

He watched them both with thoughtful eyes for several minutes, aware the comfort of having them at his side was lulling him to sleep until he opened his eyes again to find sunlight and Mia’s blue orbs staring right back at him.

He stared into her eyes for long moments, neither one of them really making a move other than gentle breathing and the occasional blink. She wasn't running or pushing him away.  

Sophie's presence was no longer there behind her back and Mia couldn't speak for the emotions welling up inside of her again at the sight of Shane in the morning, all ruffled dark curls and sleepy eyes. She saw fondness and worry there. For her.

She opened her mouth to speak, but the words just wouldn't come out. She was terrified he'd push her away now that she'd shown her weakness, but Shane seemed to know what was going on because his arm slipped over her side and tugged her to his chest. His forehead pressed to hers as he calmed the raging sea of her mind.

"I know… I know," he whispered. "I'm right here."

"Thank you," she said softly, then sighed and allowed herself one more minute of him holding her.

She needed to get up. Told herself she needed to start the day and that the apocalypse didn't mean she could slack off.

His hold loosened the moment she resisted, and she was grateful he didn't try to make her stay. If he hadn’t, she would never have been able to leave the strongman embrace of his arms now that she'd felt them. She’d shown enough weakness for now. For a lifetime, it feels.

Shane sat up too, ruffling a hand through his curling locks. Mia thought he looked better with them wild atop his head than shaved the way she had first seen him. Wild suited him much better than being well-kept.

"I'm teaching you to fight. Both of you."

He pushed himself to his feet, turning to look at her as she riffled through a basket of her new clothes. 

"What?" Her hands froze, holding a pair of jeans.

"What happened yesterday? It ain't ever gonna happen again, Mia." His gaze hardened slightly, but she knew the anger there wasn’t directed at her. The fire in his eyes made her want to match it, and that was a whole new feeling she just didn't need to feel right now. 

"I.."

"No. You're learnin’."

Shane moved to her crouching form, gently tugging the jeans free of her too-tight grip before she could rip them. 

"I won't ever tell you what to do or order you around, sweetheart. But, God dammit, you gotta learn to defend yourself, okay?" He tilted her chin up so she looked up at him. "Just learn enough to hold on till I get there. I'll always come to help you Mia."

“What about Sophie?”

Shane’s lips quirked up into a half smile. “See, now she’s a wildcat when it comes to protectin’ you, but the two’a ya ain’t so great when it comes to helping yourselves instead of each other.”

She understood his meaning. He wasn’t going to teach them to fight walkers – he knew they already had that down no problem. It was the other monsters of the world they needed defending against that he wanted to help them with. And, after freezing up so bad the day before, she knew he wasn’t wrong.

“When you say you’re gonna teach us… what do you mean?” Mia wondered. 

Although she knew Shane wouldn’t judge her for it, she couldn’t voice her fears about the idea of having him in such close proximity in that sort of scenario. Her mind would know he wasn’t a threat and it wasn’t real, but her body probably wouldn’t, and she was worried about how it would react. If she’d even be able to do it at all.

“There’s a few ways,” Shane replied. “I was a firearms instructor as a cop, so I could teach you how to load, clean and shoot no sweat. It’s physical combat you need to learn more than anythin’, though. You need to know how to handle anyone who gets too close for you to use a gun on, no matter how big or small they are. How I teach that’ll be entirely up to you. We can start with me demonstratin’ an’ you copyin’, then maybe tryin’ a coupl’a combinations with your sister? If you don’t want me to get close to ya, I won’t.”

Mia nodded, grateful he’d understood her concerns without her having to voice them. It shouldn’t have surprised her, really.

“I’ll need to ask Soph-”

“No need,” Sophie said from the door. Mia turned to watch her sister as she walked in with three cups of the instant coffee they’d found on a recent run. “I think it’s a good idea.”

“Yeah?” Shane checked. Sophie smiled at him as she handed Mia her cup – black, no sugar, same as Shane’s – then sat next to him on the edge of the bed and gave him his.

“Makes sense,” Sophie confirmed. 

“Shootin’ that gun yesterday? I have no idea how that bullet managed to hit him. Think it was more panic than anything. I want to know how to control that. But first, we gotta to learn how to stop that kind of scenario from happening in the first place. I don’t think I’d have reacted any differently to you, Mia, if it were me they grabbed.”

She looked over to her sister, wanting her to see the truth in that statement. The only thing that had stopped her from locking up as well had been that desire to save Mia. Shane was right on the money when he said they weren’t so great at using that fight to save themselves.

“We need some kinda way of letting you know what level we’re at,” Sophie continued. “So that when we get to that stage when simply showing us isn’t enough anymore, we can spar with you without you having to worry about us.”

“A safeword?” Mia realized.

“Exactly. Even if it’s just green, amber and red. Least that way we all got that safety net.” Sophie locked eyes with Mia. “It’s your call.”

Shane nodded, gaze shifting between the two of them as he took in what they were saying. He’d half expected them to resist, but the fact they were willing to give it a shot made his chest swell with pride. He should’ve known better than to think they wouldn’t want to learn to defend themselves like that. He’d always try to be there for them, but knowing they’d be able to handle things if anything got in the way of that would make him feel less anxious on runs.

He took a sip of his coffee, then grimaced at the same time Sophie did when she tasted hers. Two sugars. Way too sweet. They swapped cups, not caring when their lips met the rim right over where the other’s mouth had been.

Mia considered each option, turning them over and over in her mind before finally settling on a plan. “That green, amber and red thing? I think it’s a good idea. That’ll- that’ll help.”

“Then it’s settled,” Sophie replied. “You good with that, Shane?”

“Yeah,” he assured her. “Just let me know whenever you wanna start. It don’t gotta be today, just as long as it’s soon.”

Mia brought her coffee to her lips but didn’t take a sip, weighing it all up. _Was she really ready for that today?_

“You can always watch at first?” Sophie suggested. “Whatever you want.”

Mia lowered her coffee and suddenly felt bad for not wanting it since Sophie had made it for her. She didn't want to wake up today, she just wanted to crawl into that bed and sleep the day away. 

Her body was tired and still taut from the attack. Her mind was no better, making her think there were bodies hiding in the shadows to grab at her. 

She also wanted Shane to hold her again. And, God, that hurt, because she didn't need to be a baby about this entire thing. She'd survived a year or more locked in that freezer. Yesterday was nothing. She needed to learn how to make sure that wouldn't happen again. 

"Not today. Tomorrow - first light." She grabbed the jeans from a moment ago and a camo style t-shirt Sophie had tossed at her just yesterday.

Shane nodded. "That's fine with me."

He sipped at his coffee and Mia found herself doing the same, accepting she’d have to wake up somehow, then she walked from the bedroom, wanting a few moments to herself.

Sophie watched her sister go and sighed softly, leaning her head onto Shane's shoulder as his arm wound around her waist to hold her close. She’d give her some space, but that wouldn’t stop her worrying. Shane kissed her hair. She knew he felt the same.

In the bathroom, Mia stripped the days old clothes from her body and flung them to the corner where a sizable pile was already sitting. Her gaze landed on a face across from her and she stepped back in a panic, only to realize it was her own reflection staring back at her. 

Her cheeks and jaw were angular. Thin. Not like the full ones she had before the world ended. Blue eyes stared back in shock at her own reflection, looking big compared to the rest of her. Her shoulders were still bony and she had absolutely no waist.

Mia turned from left to right and caught a glimpse of the ridged scars over her back. She tugged her long hair away from her back and her bottom lip trembled at the sight.

Riddled wasn't the word. Full wasn't the word. Overrun. That's what it was. Her back, her thighs, her sides… Hell, even a sizable chunk of her shoulders. The flesh was nothing but healed and still-healing scars from the wounds she'd gained in captivity. 

They were ugly.

Mia looked at herself again and anger rose up. Rage. A fiery inferno against those who had dared do this, to damage her like that. To try to destroy her. Try to make her feel worthless because of it.

Mia's eyes flickered over the simple pair of scissors on the small countertop in the bathroom, glinting in the early morning light that filtered through the high window. She stared at the frail looking young woman in the mirror. She hated that image. The person staring back at her was not the person she used to know. It disgusted her. 

Her fingers closed around the scissors. Her other hand reached up and grabbed a chunk of her long hair. It reached her ribs now and was in the way all the damn time. 

It was what the man had grabbed yesterday. His meaty greasy fist gripped onto the long locks. 

The first strands fell into the sink.

Mia took a deep breath. Did it again. Again.

A pile of her hair started the gather, her chestnut locks looking silky and smooth, mocking her with their beauty.

She didn't care if it looked ugly. She was never gonna be beautiful again, could never go back to being that girl from before. What they'd done would never go away. It was part of her now, branded on her skin, so why hide it behind long hair that did nothing but get in the way? Fuck it. Fuck them.

She chucked the hair into the trash bin, glad to be free of the weight, and looked at her new reflection. This girl, she knew.

Mia dressed quickly, pulling on the camo printed tee and stalking out. The soft voices in the main room stopped as her feet brought her to the doorway

"Jesus..." Shane muttered, eyes wide and he set down the pistol he was cleaning onto the table in front of him.  

"My God... Mia? What did... Your hair!" Sophie was on her in a second, tugging gently on the much shorter length of it. Now just above her shoulders and lighter than ever. 

Mia stared at her sister, waiting for her reaction. 

“You…” Sophie shook her head and smiled proudly. “Wow.”

"Looks good on you sweetheart." Shane gave her a smile and a playful wink. 

Mia smiled back at them both, then flopped down on the sofa opposite Shane to watch him work on the pistol. She felt _good._

The next day morning, the three of them cleared a space in the spare bedroom, pushing the bed up on its end against the wall and shoving the few other items of furniture out the way so they had room to move. They’d originally considered going outside, but didn’t want the noise to attract anyone or anything passing by, so settled for wrecking the spare bedroom instead since Shane had temporarily moved into their room anyway.

Mia was only going to watch the training session for now, but she was eager to see what techniques Shane had lined up for them both. She had always been a quick study, learning better visually than by doing something like Sophie did, and she couldn’t deny the thought of watching Sophie try to take down Shane wasn’t amusing.

She settled herself in the corner of the room with the best view, folding her legs under her as she watched Sophie sweep her hair into a high ponytail, the ends long enough to still brush well past her shoulders even when tied up. Her sister rolled her shoulders back and was almost bouncing on her toes, the way she always did when antsy to learn something new. She’d been the same when they’d first tried a new parkour move.

Sophie was excited and nervous at the same time, body humming with the anticipation of getting to exert itself doing something useful. Shane came to stand opposite her, biceps bulging slightly as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Hit me.”

Sophie frowned. “Wh-What?”

“Hit me,” Shane repeated simply.

“You’re joking, right?” Sophie looked at Mia, who was hiding a smirk in the cup of coffee she was too interested in drinking for it to be real. “I’m meant to be learning something new, not beatin’ you up.”

“I need to see what your instincts are,” Shane told her. “Need to know what patterns you default into, what movements come naturally. Ain’t no point tryna paint over something that’s already in there.”

“There’s nothing natural about hitting you, Shane,” Sophie protested with a shake of her head. “Hurting you isn’t instinctual.”

He smirked at her, eyes mischievous. “What, you think you’re actually gonna manage to hurt me? You think you’ll actually land a punch?”

“Oh, it’ll land,” Sophie assured him. She saw Mia’s smirk widen out the corner of her eye, and it pissed her off.

“Prove it,” Shane countered. “Go on, girl. I’ll make it easy for ya.”

He stepped forward and opened his arms wide, taunting her with that smile and a raised eyebrow.

“So, you want me to just hit you once, or what?” Sophie put her hands on her hips, frustrated he was treating this like a game.

“Do whatever you gotta do, girl,” Shane replied, almost swaggering toward her, so fucking cocky. Sophie gritted her teeth, but held out. He wanted to play? That was fine with her.

“C’mon, hit me,” he teased, stepping right where she wanted him to. “I’m right he-”

Sophie lunged, fist swinging up towards his face and stunning him as it smacked his cheek. She’d pulled the punch, but only barely, not wanting to actually hurt him. He recovered quicker than she expected, reaching out to grab her, but she managed to twist out the way and bring her leg up to knee his ribs. Again, the contact was light, but it had enough of an impact to prove her point.

Shane backed away from her, shaking off the hit, and Sophie smirked at him, proud of herself for actually landing the hits. She’d been in a few scraps before, but usually she wasn’t on the offensive quite this much so it was a bit of a shock to her system.

“Told you I’d la-”

Shane lurched forward and swiped at her bicep, twisting her round and pulling her into his chest before she even registered the movement. His arms clamped around her as his foot kicked hers out to the side to knock her off balance, only for him to hold her tightly enough she couldn’t fall.

His breaths were slightly labored, matching hers, and his voice came out as a low growl as his lips brushed the outer shell of her ear.

“Rule number one: don’t let your guard down.”

Mia had frozen at his quick movement. Eyes wide, not at the fact Shane held Sophie so tightly, but because she could see a side of Shane she'd only caught glimpses of before that moment. 

Her thighs wanted to clench at the sight. His thick, muscled arms were wrapped around Sophie, holding her up simply with brute strength, his eyes a shade darker than normal.

Sophie was released and she spun around, arm raised to hit him again, but Shane swiped it away with one hand while the other reached out to grab her.

Sophie jumped back with a tight backflip.  

Shane's eyes narrowed. "Do that again."

Before Sophie could react or say anything, he launched himself at her again and she did as asked, flipping backwards twice more till her back was against the wall.

"You're quick. Use that."

Shane crooked his finger at Sophie, and she obliged by throwing herself across the room at him. Shane's arm slipped around her waist and yanked her front to his chest, her right arm pinned and the left wrist caught in his grip.  

"Get out of my hold."

He smirked down at her and watched as she thought it through. Tested his grips on her.

She thrust her knee up into his thigh, dangerously close to his groin, and made him curl slightly forward. Using his new position to her advantage, she bucked her head forward to snap at his cheek, not his nose, and he released her. She caught herself from falling by rolling to land in a spread half-frog pose, then tumbled to the left and behind him, out of reach. 

Shane clapped as Sophie caught her breath, bent over with her hands on her knees and grinning triumphantly back at him. 

"Good girl! Use those skills you've got. We'll work on a technique for you in a bit." He smiled back at her, the kind that reached his eyes. "Take a breather."

He turned to find Mia standing against the wall, her expression dark with something he couldn't quite read yet. Her arms were crossed over her chest, making that tiny tank top she had on push her breasts up further, and her thighs were pressed tightly together. She knew his gaze was on her, and she liked it.

She also liked the way he moved like a wild animal in a brawl, swift and sure in his movements with the strength to back them up. He was a loose cannon, yet knew exactly what he was doing anyway.

He crooked his finger at her. "Your turn, sweetheart."

Mia smirked and pushed off the wall, popping her neck and revelling in how light she felt without all that damned hair hanging down. Shane didn't think she could fight, that she wouldn’t fight, but he was about to be proven wrong.

"Same thing as Sophie. Hit me."

Shane barely got the words out before she was spinning on her heel, a boot meeting his chest and sending him staggering back. He quickly recovered and dodged the next one. Mia was out of reach, but only just. From the way she was dancing around him, he could tell this wasn't her first fight.

He saw an opening and took it, surprising her by sidestepping and kicking out her legs from under her. He grabbed her upper arm and slammed her back to his chest.

She was breathing hard, but his breathing was deep and measured. Her fingers scratched at his side as his thick arms wrapped around her torso and waist, holding her to him much tighter than he had Sophie. Somehow, he knew she wasn’t afraid to really go at him.

"Break out." His voice was husky and dark, right in her ear. She couldn't suppress a shiver from going down her spine.

Mia used his body against him, thrusting her hips against his as hard as she could. Shane's hold lessened and she used her teeth to her advantage, sinking them somewhat gently into his bicep. His arms fell away and she leaned forward, back straight and legs locked tight as one came up to propel her into a tumble spin, kicking his shoulder. He fell to one knee as she did the same flip as Sophie to get out of reach.

"Goddamn, girl."

Shane rubbed his shoulder and avoided her gaze, hiding the wild, hungry look in his eyes that had nothing to do with getting hit but had everything to do with the girl that did it.

"I may have been arrested a few times for bar brawls and the occasional smack down." She shrugged and tried to catch her breath, blaming the exertion of what they’d done for the flame in her cheeks and the sudden ache between her thighs.

"It shows,” Shane told her, only his eyes betraying what was going on in his head. He could keep it under control – this was about helping them, not taking advantage. “You’re a brawler, you fight dirty, and we can use that.” 

Mia looked down at the floor and smiled proudly, taking the compliment.

“Most people will be bigger than you, but a lot of ‘em won’t be trained. They’ll go on instinct, they’ll be messy, and they’ll rely on their size to pin you down.” Shane rolled his shoulders, surprised to still be feeling Mia’s kick. The girl hadn’t held back. “So rule number two? Use that strength against them, and don’t let ‘em get that far. Once they’ve pinned ya, it’s gonna be a lot of work to get back out from under ‘em, and you wanna conserve your energy.” 

Mia nodded in understanding. She could do offense. She understood that.

“Think on that while you take a sec.” Shane looked over to Sophie, who had been watching intently. “Your turn, sweetheart.”

Mia strode over and reached a hand down to help Sophie up, her eyes alight with something that was a lot like happiness, but wilder somehow. She was in her element, that power flooding through her veins making her forget everything else. She’d kicked Shane’s ass a little, and he’d let her. Getting that control back over her body and using it like that was exhilarating.

Sophie smiled and let Mia pull her to her feet, but there was something on her face Mia couldn’t quite place. Had she not been quite so high on the adrenaline rush, she might have noticed that Sophie’s hand was shaking slightly. Instead, she smirked and plopped herself down on the floor, ready to watch her sister kick Shane’s ass again.

Sophie took a steadying breath as she took up her position on one side of the room, not quite able to understand what had got her feeling on edge. It wasn’t about Shane, she knew that much – she wasn’t afraid of him. She liked the fact he was teaching them this, that Mia had enjoyed having that power back while they sparred. But something inside her had tightened when she’d watched them both, and she had no clue what it was.

“Right, so this time I want you to use the same energy as before,” Shane began, drawing her focus back to him. “You’re fast, and you can use that to your advantage. You ain’t a brawler like your sister, but if you can get in there first and take ‘em down? I can show you a few ways to knock ‘em out quick, give you time to get away.”

“Alright,” Sophie agreed. “Show me.”

“You need to get in close for this one - it’ll catch ‘em off guard and give you that window you need, so I’mma take a step and grab you first, alright?” Shane explained everything as he did it, giving her time to process. “We’ll go slow first time – you can knock me on my ass in a sec.”

His hands closed around her wrists as she brought them up in front of her as if to block him, eyes focused on hers.

“Feel that?” Shane squeezed gently, right over the bone, demonstrating how hard it would be to wriggle free in a real-life scenario. “Use that grip against me. Pull your arms back hard. Do it now.”

Sophie yanked her arms in towards her chest, sending Shane tumbling towards her, then hooked her foot around the ankle of the leg he’d stepped forward with to catch himself and pulled gently, guessing the next step.

“Good girl,” Shane praised. “That’s exactly what I want ya to do. This time, I want you to go for it. Put me flat on my ass. I know you can.”

Sophie nodded, giving him a half smile.

“You’re gonna wanna land on me, pin my arms and legs so I can’t grab you, ‘kay?” Shane held her gaze, making sure everything stuck. “Do whatever feels right, ‘cause in a real life scenario, that’s all you’re gonna have. No fancy technique’s gonna come to ya when you got some asshole tryna get in your face.”

“Okay.” Sophie took a steadying breath and stepped back, running it over in her head. “Let’s do this.”

Shane counted to three, then lunged for her, grabbing her arms just like they’d practiced. Sophie was quick, pulling him in then tugging his leg out from under him in a second. They tumbled to the floor, Shane flat on his back and pulling her down on top of him. Sophie thrust their still joined arms up over his head and planted her knees and shins on his thighs as she pushed herself down as hard as she could. He struggled under her, but she kept her weight even at all four points, refusing to let him roll or throw her off him.

“Well, fuck,” Shane muttered, quietly impressed.

Sophie looked down at him, eyes flitting between his lips and eyes. They were so close, and it made that coil inside her tighten even more. Her stomach felt hot and her breathing hitched, heart pounding so hard she thought he’d probably be able to hear it. Something was shooting through every nerve, and it overwhelmed her, even as her hips pressed down towards Shane’s of their own accord.

The word escaped her without conscious thought. “Amber.”

Shane immediately let go of her arms and she pushed herself upright with a start, sitting back on his thighs as she ran her shaking hands through her hair. He pushed himself up on his elbows, but didn’t touch her, eyes filled with worry.

“M’okay,” she mumbled, but couldn’t hold his gaze. “M’alright.”

“Soph?” Mia called softly.

Sophie glanced up at Shane’s face and saw the anxious expression there. She wanted to make it go away, wanted to explain that it wasn’t anything he’d done, but she barely understood her reaction herself and had no idea where to even begin.

“I’m alright,” she said more firmly. “I think I get that one. Your go, Mia.”

Sophie pushed herself off Shane and walked over to her sister with shaking legs, giving her a reassuring nod before trading places and sinking to the floor with her back to the wall. Sensing Mia’s inquisitive eyes on her, the darker brunette smiled weakly, silently telling her sister to keep going, that she’d figure her own shit out. She wasn’t panicked or freaked out about the actual physicality of what they were doing, just how her body was reacting to it.

Mia held her gaze for just a moment longer, then nodded and went to stand by Shane in the middle of the room. She shook out her arms and gestured for Shane to go ahead with whatever he was going to teach her. 

"I wanna try and teach you somethin’. You're flexible enough it just might work.” He pointed to the area just below his ribs with his index finger and tapped at the spot twice. " I want you to kick here. Do a simple front kick, but keep your foot planted."

"Okay."

"That’s gonna make ‘em curl up, so you need to take your opposite foot, plant it on my back using your knee as the hook. When I try to stand, you bring up your other foot, then clamp your thighs around my neck."  He walked her through the motions, pointing out the key areas she needed to aim for. "You're gonna need to clamp down _hard_ , then use your weight to fly back and throw me over onto the ground, alright?"

Mia worked the moves over in her head and realized what he was teaching her.

 

"Are you... Is this the thigh move thingy from Black Widow?"

Shane smirked, and Mia smiled back. If Shane thought she could pull off that acrobatic feat, she’d at least try. 

"Come on. Put me on my ass."

Shane motioned for her to come at him, so she did. 

She dashed forward right in front of him, kicking hard into his gut with all her strength, and Shane falls forward slightly, curling up just like he said. Her foot barely touches back down on the ground before her other leg swings to curl around his neck and shoulder.

The moment he started to straighten, Mia’s free leg came to join the first, wrapping tightly around him before she threw all her weight backwards. She bent backwards and was surprised when Shane’s body actually moved despite her lesser strength. Before she could blink, she stumbled back on the dismount and Shane landed flat on his back, chuckling with a prideful smile on his lips. 

“That's my girl!"

Mia and Shane both tensed at the endearment. Shane feared he’d gone too far, but Mia liked how it sounded on his lips. She grinned at him and let out a soft laugh, making the nervous tenseness in his shoulders go lax. As her breathing started to steady, Shane clambered to his feet and grinned back at her.

"You stumbled on the dismount," Sophie pointed out. They turned to look at her in surprise, almost having forgotten she was even there since she'd been so quiet. "And Shane, you hesitated before you stood - next time, you gotta react for real. Don't just isolate that one move. She can take it." 

Mia smiled at her sister's confidence in her, then raised an eyebrow at Shane.

"Alright," he agreed. "Go again."

Kick, plant, swing, lift, push, release, land. Her feet planted on the floor again, this time a bit steadier than the first. She heard the sound of a heavy body smacking to the floor and winced. Shane had to have been bruised from that.

"You okay?" Mia smirked as he rubbed at his back. "Didn't hurt ya, did I?"

"Aw, sweetheart. Takes a lot more than that to hurt me."

He grinned wolfishly before launching at her. Mia jerked to the side, barely missing his fingers as they zipped past. He was throwing punches and she was deflecting or dodging best she could. She wasn’t as fast as Sophie, but she was just as flexible so went on the offensive, throwing her knee up to block a hit and using the momentum to drop to a crouch before kicking his legs out from under him. 

Shane was just as quick, though, and as he fell he gripped her sides and rolled her under him, his hips landing between her thighs and pressing down to pin her to the floor. He pushed her wrists up beside her head and towered above her, his sweat damp curls hanging down and his face an inch from her own as their heavy breathing mingled. 

"Color," he barely grunted out. 

 "Green."

She was breathing hard, liking how close he was and how he was holding her to the floor. It was thrilling, not scary, but she wanted to prove a point. Prove that she could do this, that she was strong and wouldn't become weak underneath a man ever again.

She slammed her forehead into his nose just hard enough for him to release her wrists as he grabbed at his face. She bucked her hips up to roll him off her, then tumbled out of reach to stand on her feet.

"Good girl,” he praised as he got to his feet again.

With a cry, she launched herself at him only to be grabbed at the hip and wrist and thrown down to the floor again, ending up in the exact same spot as before. Her chest heaved with each breath and he smirked down at her triumphantly. She stared up at him, barely resisting the urge to push her hips up into his as he pressed down against her.

"Rule three: know when to quit.” He leant forward and pressed his forehead to hers for just a moment, mistaking the look in her eyes for fear of how he was holding her. He had no idea how much her body throbbed with want. "You're great at offense, but you see a chance to run, you gotta run. Don't attack unless you have to."

They ran through several more rounds each, picking up new ways to dodge and escape different holds both from Shane and by watching each other. The twins had very different styles, but they embraced it, playing to their individual strengths instead of trying to conform to one set pattern. Sophie hadn’t felt so jittery since they’d moved on from that first take-down, focusing instead on breaking Shane’s holds on her arms and dodging his advances. The physical space allowed her to breathe, but her mind kept going back to that feeling that flooded through her when she pinned Shane down. It made no sense.

“Right, let’s take a break,” Shane said a little breathlessly as he recovered from his and Mia’s latest spar, during which she’d made it exceptionally hard for him to catch her.

“I’ll go make some lunch,” Mia panted, reaching down to haul Sophie to her feet. She shot a glance at Shane, then met her twin’s eyes. “You good?”

Sophie nodded. “Just… give me a sec?”

“This about…” Mia trailed off, not needing to finish her sentence for Sophie to catch her meaning.

“Yeah,” Sophie admitted. “I need to figure something out.”

“Call me if you need anything,” Mia told her quietly, then squeezed her sister’s hand before mock-saluting Shane on her way out the door.

Sophie pulled her hair from its ponytail as Shane bent over to grab the half-empty water bottle he’d been chugging to stay hydrated. The sparring session had been more physically tiring than he’d expected, but he was pleased the girls had given him such a tough ride. He knew he had it in them – he just hadn’t expected to see that side of them so soon, especially Mia. He could tell she genuinely enjoyed fighting, and he’d had a difficult time trying not to let his body react the way it wanted to.

“Shane?”

He looked up at Sophie and ran a hand through his slightly sweat-damp hair. “Yeah, Darlin’?”

“Mind if I quickly run something through with you again?” Sophie asked, sounding a little nervous.

He put the water bottle back on the floor and moved back towards the center of the room. “’Course, sweetheart, what did you wanna do?”

“That take-down you showed me?” Sophie shifted uneasily. “Can we… Can we try that one more time?”

Shane bit his bottom lip, considering it. “You sure?”

Sophie nodded, coming to stand in front of him again. “I just wanna see something.”

“Alright,” he reluctantly agreed. “But you gotta use your colors, okay?”

“I will,” Sophie assured him. “Just go same as before, alright? Don’t hold back, I need to… I need to know.”

Shane watched her for a moment, taking in how she rolled her shoulders and focused herself, eyes aware and body ready. He let out a steadying breath, then lunged.

Sophie was quicker than before and more forceful, yanking him in then taking him down so hard the breath was knocked out of him upon landing. She scrambled into position on top of him, and he didn’t have to try to move to know she had him pinned good. Her hair fell round them like some kind of dark privacy curtain, and her green eyes were bright with something other than fear this time.

Sophie let out a surprised breath as that warmth settled through her body again, but this time she was ready for it. This time, she let herself shift until her hips could rock down onto him and leaned towards him instead of away, bringing their faces even closer together as she finally understood what was going on.

She looked down at Shane’s lips and recognized that tightening inside her for what it was. Hunger. Desire. Want. Pure as it was unexpected. It made her body come alive.

“Color?”

Her gaze shifted to Shane’s as she felt her lips turn up in a happy smile.

“Green,” she whispered. She pressed her forehead to his and closed her eyes so he wouldn’t see the relieved tears that had gathered in them.

“Soph-”

She kissed him, slow and deep, revelling in the heat that intensified inside her and set all her nerves alight with want. She heard herself moan softly as her hips rolled against his, then gasped at the feel of Shane’s body reacting to her. Shane froze at her intake of breath, but she was quick to soothe his concern with a lingering kiss.

“Green,” she told him again, then slowly pushed herself up and away from him so she could meet his gaze. Shane stared at her the same way he had in that thrift store after she’d put on that outfit, like he was truly seeing her for the first time. “You?”

Shane swallowed hard, then gave her a half-smile as he understood her meaning. “Green.”

“Okay.” Sophie sat up and let out a soft laugh of relief. “Good.”

She ran her fingers through her hair, then grinned at him as she pushed herself to her feet. Her body was humming with that energy still, and it spiked when she reached down and he took her hands in his so she could pull him to his feet. He didn’t need the help, but neither of them cared.

When they were both standing, Sophie squeezed his hands tightly in reassurance, then smiled before letting go and heading out to join her sister in the main room. She knew her cheeks must have been flushed by the heat that radiated off them, but Mia said nothing when she looked up from the food she was warming, just nodded one before focusing back on their lunch.

Sophie smiled to herself.

They were all going to be okay.


	5. Feels So Good (where i want him now)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You know how I’ve always said we’d work as a trio? This was what I meant. You’ve been holding back because you don’t want to hurt me, but it’s okay. You don’t have to pretend you don’t want her. You can have us both. We won’t get jealous or think you’re taking advantage. We want that too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter is a big one (pun intended)... Hope you enjoy! x

In the weeks that passed since that first training session, the girls came on leaps and bounds with their fighting, getting more confident with each new move Shane taught them. They actually presented a bit of a challenge to him, catching him unawares as they worked their own parkour style moves into their sparring and kept him on his toes at all times. 

It didn’t help that the two of them loved to tease him – Mia fought dirty and often toed the line between sexual and efficient contact, getting much closer than was strictly necessary while still getting the job done, whereas Sophie distracted him with rolls of her hips and flirtatious smiles that made him fumble his holds.

They were more physical with him even when they weren’t in the training room. Mia openly started to touch him now she was no longer putting that barrier between herself and him, though he wouldn’t describe her as being overly affectionate. She was more practical, a hand on his arm as he showed her how to unload and clean a gun, a pat on the back as she passed him… It showed she trusted him, and although she kept some distance, he knew that was just because she wasn’t a hugely touchy feely person like her sister was.

And then there was Sophie. She wouldn’t stop touching him, and it drove him crazy. Not because it was annoying – far from it. It drove him crazy trying to restrain himself. She didn’t even seem to realize she was doing it, all soft moans and hands tugging his hair when they kissed, which was often now. She seemed to come into her own, body moving of its own accord to get closer, but there was still a barrier there. It wasn’t hugely obvious, but he knew it existed all the same. She wasn’t ready for more yet, happy just discovering herself again, and Shane was okay with that. It was hard – pun intended – but he wasn’t going to push her. He could live with things just the way they were.

“Right, Mia, I want you to try that again, okay?” He bent his knees and patted them with his hands to encourage her. 

“Don’t overthink it, just do it.”

Mia nodded and went again, running at Shane and trading blows before she kicked at his stomach and swung her leg up. Shane lifted her up, just as they’d practiced, and threw her weight backwards. Instead of Shane going off balance like she’d expected, though, he flipped her up and slammed her back against the wall, shocking the breath from her. Her thighs tensed tight around his neck as she scrambled against the wall for balance. 

"What?!"

Her gaze met Shane’s and anything else she might have said fell away. His eyes were darker than normal, like aged cognac in a dark glass tumbler and filled with want. She’d known rubbing against him throughout her session would make him more aggressive in his own teasing, but this wasn't what she expected. 

The sight of him beneath her send a rush of liquid heat flowing straight to her core. Her bare thighs surrounded his neck because of the shorts she was wearing, and his hands were pinning her wrists beside her hips as his strength alone held her up against the wall and on his shoulders. Mia could barely control her breathing, and it only got worse when Shane winked up at her and his mouth moved dangerously close to the seam of her shorts. 

"Shit."

His nose brushed right over her in a way that could’ve been considered accidental if it weren’t for the smirk playing on his lips. It was almost as if he knew exactly where he was lined up, how close he was to where she was most sensitive and wanting.

The bastard.

They had been teasing each other like animals in heat the whole session, touching in a way that would make any man jumpy and itching for a hot cunt to fuck and leave any woman with sopping panties and tense thighs. They hadn't breeched that line yet, though.

Mia sort of knew why. He was afraid to give in because he’d already kissed Sophie - repeatedly – and was afraid the twins would be jealous of the other if he went too far. Shane had no idea they were more than willing to share when it came to him, still stuck at the edge of wanting them both but not knowing how to proceed. He probably thought they’d leave, or maybe even fight because of it, and that made Mia want to smack him upside the head.

Mia was tired of waiting. She wanted Shane and she wanted him now. She felt empowered by her fighting skills, and felt safe in his presence and arms. It was time to kick that line to dust. 

He was playing with her now, more than he had been before, and it was partly her fault for grinding down on his length earlier to win their first round of sparring and leaving him hard and wanting. In her defence, though, he'd been teasing her in training all morning and it wasn’t in her nature to roll over and let him get away with it. Two could play at that game.

Mia flexed her thighs, spreading her legs until all her weight dropped off his shoulders onto his wrists. He couldn’t support her like that, so he dropped his arms and as she landed she quickly punched him in the stomach to catch him unawares. He reached out for her, but she used the wall as a kick start to shove him as hard as she could, pushing him onto his back and pinning him down by his wrists and thighs.

She smiled and rolled off him. “I win.”

"This time," Shane conceded as they got to their feet again. He pulled her back in by her elbow to kiss her cheek and nuzzled into her neck slightly. Mia only stayed there a second before turning away, still not one for prolonged contact. 

They made their way onto the main room and Mia went over to check on the lunch Sophie was cooking over the fireplace. Sophie smacked her with a small towel, hard on her thigh.

"Hey!"

"It's not ready!" Sophie scolded. Mia rolled her eyes.

Shane was leaning against the doorframe with his thumbs in his beltloops as he watched them with a smile on his face. It may have been a hungry smile, but it was still warm.

Both of them were wearing cut off shorts in an attempt to counter the stuffiness inside, and their tank tops were damp with sweat at the neck and small of their backs. They didn’t bother with bras anymore, and it was killing him more than the heat.

Mia peered into the cockpit over the fire. "What is it, anyways?"

"I found a can of chicken chunks and one of small red potatoes, plus some spices,” Sophie explained. “So… we’re having stew and you'll like it."

Sophie waved a wooden spoon at Mia, who raised her hands in surrender and backed off to watch as Shane came up and inspected the pot too. Sophie looked at him with her bottom lip between her teeth and a flush to her cheeks which deepened when he gave her an approving smile. Mia knew that look and decided to give her sister shotgun like she'd asked. 

"I’m gonna do some laundry."

Shane instantly headed over to hand her a sheathed blade. The same one she liked that tie to her thigh and belt. She knew she shouldn't need it since the cabin was pretty far into the woods, but the occasional walker did somehow find the place so it would be good to be prepared just in case.  

Mia took the knife, then gasped as Shane gently smacks at her ass before throwing him a playful glare over her shoulder as she took the basket of dirty clothes outside.

“She’ll cut your hand off if you’re not careful, you do know that, right?”

Shane shrugged nonchalantly, but looked almost a little sheepish at her having seen him do it. Sophie rolled her eyes, then stirred the pot with the stew a final time before leaving it to simmer.

Shane was trying so hard to be ‘faithful’ to the bond the two of them had, completely unaware Mia and Sophie had already discussed and agreed on what they wanted. The girls had shared their whole lives and Sophie wasn’t jealous – she was glad Mia had finally accepted how much she wanted Shane. It had become a source of entertainment for her, watching Shane struggle with the internal conflict of wanting them both, but she wouldn’t say anything until Mia was ready.

“Food’s gonna take a while,” she said casually, slowly making her way towards his place in front of the couch. “Mia’s… doing laundry.”

“Hmm…” Shane reached out to hold her hips when she was close enough, and hers slid up his chest to his shoulders. “What’cha thinking?”

Sophie smiled coyly, then pushed herself up to kiss him, deep and slow. She tilted her head and let her tongue tease his lower lip, then moaned softly when his fingers slowly slid up to her waist. He’d gotten the message.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, hips pressing tight against his, then gasped when his hands slipped under her armpits to lift her up against him. The display of strength made her thighs tighten around his hips, hands threading into his hair to tug gently as she kissed him a little deeper. He grunted at the sensation, so she did it again, then gasped as he sat down on newly repaired middle cushion of the couch with her in his lap and started kissing her neck.

Her hips ground down onto his as her head fell back, giving him better access, and one of his hands slipped under her shirt to glide over her lower back and up her spine. His touch felt amazing, as always, but there was something about doing this while she was wearing short shorts that was different, somehow. More intense.

She brought his face back to hers and kissed him passionately, tongue curling around his as her pelvis started to rock, creating the most amazing friction. The fingers of his free hand brushed over her hair as he palmed her upper back, and when he shifted, it pulled on the locks slightly, making Sophie hiss in a breath.

Shane moved his hand immediately, only for her to shake her head and mumble, “Green.”

He held her gaze as he slowly let his fingers tangle in her hair and pull gently, gauging her reaction. Her mouth fell open and she let her head fall back with the motion, back arching in a beautiful curve to push her breasts forward.

“Fuck,” he muttered, using his grip on her hair to pull her lips back to his. Sophie mewled softly, kissing him back with renewed vigor while her hands moved to cup his face. She ground down against him, settling into a rhythm that made him groan with want. He slipped the hand on her back down to her hip, fingers flexing against the fabric of those damn shorts as she moved above him.

They had gotten this far before, but she’d never rocked against him like that with such urgency, like she was chasing something instead of just experimenting. It made him hungry for more, testing his restraint more than ever, but he just let her move how she wanted, not wanting to push.

She switched between slow circles and quicker movements back and forth, learning what felt best and focusing on that as his hand started to push and pull with her. He didn’t try to change her rhythm, just helped her along, but it made a world of difference and encouraged her to chase whatever it was she was feeling.

“Shane…” she moaned, forehead pressing to his as the seam of her shorts shifted, putting the perfect amount of pressure on her core. “Shane, I…”

He thrust up against her just so and tugged on her hair again, and suddenly her fingers were grabbing his shoulders on reflex as that wave that had been building up inside of her finally crested. Her hips gave an abortive jerk and she cried out his name, eyes locked on his as they widened at the realization of what was happening. She let it flow over her, head to toe, and amazement and joy filled her all at once.

“Holy shit,” she panted. “Oh, holy shit.”

“Did you just…?”

“Yeah,” Sophie breathed, nodding. “Yeah, I… Fuck. I didn’t think my body could even _do_ that anymore. I didn’t know… Shane, I had no idea it could feel that good.”

Shane smiled and kissed her again, sending even more electricity humming along her every nerve as everything sunk in. Her body still worked right. It was still capable of finding pleasure, of feeling that way. She could not only want something mentally, but want and get it physically too. It was uplifting and empowering, and she was hungry for more. More of this. More of him.

She surged up against him, fingers pulling on his hair to return to favor as she ground her hips down in a circle, right over where he was hard and wanting. The fly of his jeans added to the friction, but it was feeling that bulge pressing right where she suddenly craved for it to be that excited her most.

He groaned under his breath, unsure if he was more riled up by her motions or the fact he’d gotten to watch her come right in front of him but she still wanted more. He ached to roll her onto her back, to see her do it again with him on top of her and bringing her there with his own movements, but he wasn’t sure if it would cross the line.

“Lie down?” he murmured against her lips. Sophie nodded, and he wrapped an arm round her waist and twisted them both so she was flat on her back across the couch with her head resting on the arm of it.

Sophie wrapped her legs around him and pulled him down to meet her, lips finding his again like a magnet as he caught himself on his hands to avoid crushing her. He gave an experimental rock of his hips and heard her mewl in response, legs tightening around him.

“More,” she begged. “Please, more.”

He thrust against her a little harder and kissed his way down to her neck again, lips and teeth teasing the delicate skin as she writhed below him. He shifted his weight onto one hand and brought the other down to her thigh, gliding over the bare skin the way he’d been dreaming about all morning.

Her breath caught in her throat at the sensation, and she found herself arching into him, desperate for more. She was strung tight again already, more alive than ever as he moved above her, against her, with her, and she knew it wouldn’t take much for a second orgasm to hit her.

“Shane…”

His hips jerked forward sharply in response to hearing his name on her lips like that, and she gasped, mouth falling open as her eyes met his. The angle was slightly different like this, so his movement had made that hard bulge rub right over her in a way she hadn’t realized she’d needed until then.

“Green,” she whispered. “Fuck. Green… please…”

He increased his pace, letting his hips rock down harder against hers that same way as she clutched his shoulders in an attempt to steady herself against the onslaught of sensation. The fabric of his jeans created the most delicious friction, and he felt that tell-tale tightening in his groin but kept it at bay. This wasn’t about him. It was about her.

“Shane,” she moaned. “Shane, please…”

She pressed their foreheads together tightly and her eyes fell shut, unable to stand the look in his eyes as the feel of him all at once. It was too much to handle, too good, too overwhelming.

“Nearly, Darlin’,” he murmured, voice husky as his lips brushed hers with every word. “There you go. I gotcha.”

Her mouth fell open, but no sound came out, and within moments her back was arching and her legs tightened around him almost painfully tightly, holding his hips still as hers rolled against them with her orgasm. Shane smiled against her lips, then kissed her as she slowly opened her eyes again, glazed over slightly from arousal.

“Oh, my God,” she breathed. “Fuck.”

“You okay?” he asked softly.

Sophie nodded, then pressed her lips to his. “So much better than okay.”

He chuckled into her mouth, pleased he’d made her feel that way. He carefully started to pull away, but she frowned and drew him back in with her legs, eyes darting down to where he was straining against his jeans.

“What about…” Her throat closed up and the warm energy that had flowed through her turned anxious as she thought about the reality of what would be involved there.

“Doesn’t matter,” he dismissed. “It’s alright.”

Sophie frowned, trying to push her fears back. “No. No, I should…”

She reached out a shaking hand, but he caught it and brought it up to his mouth so he could kiss it instead.

“There’s no should about it,” he countered. “What’s your color right now, Darlin’? ‘Cause I know it ain’t green.”

She bowed her head, unable to meet his gaze. It was amber, and they both knew it. Her trembling at the mere thought of touching him like that confirmed as much. It would be too far, too soon.

“I want to,” she mumbled. It was true, she wanted to be able to do it, but the thought made her feel anxious and she hated it.

“But you can’t,” he finished for her. He hooked a finger under her chin and guided her head back up so he could look her in the eye. “That’s okay.”

She didn’t look convinced.

“Hey, I got to watch you come twice,” he said soothingly. “That’s more than enough for me.”

“But…”

“Oh, sweet girl,” he sighed tenderly, pushing an errant lock of hair behind her ear. “You don’t owe me nothin'."

Sophie smiled, then kissed him gently. “Thank you. I’m sorry I-… I wish I-… You’re always so patient with me and-”

“You’re worth it,” he told her truthfully, easing her worries. “So you just relax, take a bath, a nap, whatever you want. I’m gonna go see if Mia needs help with the laundry.”

“Okay,” Sophie conceded, nodding up at him. “I’ll come shout when lunch is ready.”

“That’s my girl.”

He kissed her forehead, then pushed himself off her and turned away, adjusting himself in his jeans before heading outside to join Mia.

“Mia?” he called. “Mia, where you at?”

“Here!” she shouted back, emerging from the trees. “Was just finished with the laundry, what’s-”

She came to a halt, instantly understanding what had put that slight grimace on his face. Whatever he’d done with her sister had gotten him well and truly riled up, but he was too much of a gentleman to do anything about it. She appreciated that, glad he wasn’t pushing Sophie, and it made her want to help him vent his frustration. And maybe some of hers, too.

“Wanna go spar?” she suggested. “We can test out that new combo on more realistic terrain?”

"Alright. Sounds good," Shane agreed, adjusting his jeans again. Mia couldn't help but smirk as she leaned her shoulder against a thick oak, watching him walk – no, _stalk_ \- toward her.

She licked her lips. She had seen that bulge in his jeans - it wasn't so easy to hide - and honestly, she wasn’t afraid what was beneath his boxers, not even a tiny bit. The thoughts had terrified her months ago, that he'd take advantage and force her into something or turn into _them_. Instead, Shane had proven himself time and time again. And again. And again. He wanted her, wanted them, but wasn't going to push. She respected him for it. 

Since realizing her own wants and needs, she’d discovered she not only trusted Shane with her safety but also wanted to trust him with her body. She wanted him, and by the tent in his crotch, her sister had left him wanting and hungry. She'd take care of it for him. And herself.

She followed Shane a few more feet into the tree line, still a safe distance from the house but close enough to the front door one could call for the others safely.

"Instead of sparring, I want to work on your evasive skills. I want you to run when I come after you, a'ight?" 

"Wait.” Mia frowned. “You want me to run?"

"Yes. If there's a time that you see them comin’, don't be stupid," he tells her, knowing she'll take that to heart and listen to his words now. She's not stupid - she's just cocky. "I want you to run, fast and far as you can."

"How am I-"

Shane launched himself from the stance he was in, and Mia did as he told her. She turned and ran.

She stuck close to the house by instinct, but in some spots the trees were thicker, fallen logs making up the forest floor, and there was a lot of undergrowth to trip even sure feet. 

He was behind her, letting her stay in front of him because he was fast and wanted to see how she reacted to the chase first before he really went after her at full speed. 

She was moving quickly, feet launching her off fallen trees and old stumps and letting her smaller frame slip through gaps in between trees. She used low hanging branches to add to her momentum, but Shane was still on her heels by the time she made it back to the front of the cabin.

Thick arms yanked her backwards in a move so quick she lost her breath as she was thrown to the ground. Her knee raised to kick him off, but he knew her moves off by heart now. He settled his hips between her thighs and let his massive weight hold her down.

His hands splayed in grass on either side of her shoulders as heavy breaths came from them both. There was sweat dripping from his chin to land on her already sweat-soaked tank top, revealing the lack of bra underneath as her supple breasts said hello from under the cotton. 

Adrenaline was pumping through her veins and her arms laid uselessly beside her head. Her hair fanned out in the tall grass, and the moss beneath her head and body cushioned her like a natural pillow as she looked up at Shane's darkened gaze. 

That blatant lust she'd seen just an hour ago in the training room was even hungrier now, and the chase through the woods had her heart pounding and sending blood rushing toward her core. The rest of her felt almost limp as her hips bucked up just slightly.

He groaned and that was the signal Mia wanted, so she did again, feeling the hardness of him pressing right against the seam of her shorts, and a little gasp escaped her lips.

Suddenly, he was on her, stubbled jaw burning over her neck as his lips and teeth devoured the flesh there like a three course dinner. Mia threw her head back and moaned loudly, not caring how wanton it sounded. She wanted him. She didn’t give a fuck who knew that.

"Color," he gritted out into her neck, his hips unable to stop the subtle motion of grinding against her open thighs. God, the way he moves against her was heavenly.

"Green… Green!" Her hands found his hair and tugged hard, earning a surprised gasp from him as she attacked his mouth. And fuck if he didn't taste divine, too.

Menthols, sweat… the whiskey he sipped just last night still lingered on his tongue and teeth. She moaned into his mouth and yanked his hair again as he tried to move away from her, then gasped as he fucking growled at her and pulled back sharply.

His eyes were black now, staring down at her with a smirk that promised no walking for the foreseeable future, and it made her thighs clench around his hips. Her mouth was dry and her fingers tightened in his hair. He only smirked wider at her, giving a rough roll of his hips, then groaned as she mewled under him.

"Color? Don't wanna hurt ya." _Or scare you._ That was what he was really trying to say, but they could both tell the other was just as desperate for a good hard fuck as they were.

"So fucking green." She tried to tug his hair to get him back to her mouth, but he was suddenly gone from her thighs and was standing instead. 

Before she could question the abrupt change, he was pulling her up, backing her against a tree and kissing over her neck. His hand slid over her slender sides, fingers trailing over scars and bare flesh alike with such tenderness it drove her crazy.

"Shane, just fucking touch me!" she hissed. But then he was pressing her into the tree with his full weight, causing her to lose her breath and arch up against his chest. 

His hands pushed at her tank top, rolling the cotton up her sides and baring flesh to him he'd never seen before. She had weight to her, now – she was still skinny, but damn, those curves on her… It drove him wild, how beautiful she and her sister were.

Mia was growing restless, squirming against his weight. He could see in her eyes that she wanted to be touched. There was no timidness or nervousness in her gaze, only a hungry want that matched his own.

He popped open the fly of her shorts before she even registered his hand was there, and then it was shoved into the tight space between her panties and flesh, middle finger rubbing over her clit and making her keen up against his palm and chest. Her hands uselessly tried to latch onto his bare arms.

"Jesus, fuck, you're wet," he groaned into her neck, and she nodded, unable to respond just yet because _holy fuck_ , his fingers were thick and calloused and felt so fucking good...

It took just seconds to get her on the edge, gasping softly for breath and clinging onto him like a lifeline. He pulled away before she could tip over it, nipping gently at her shoulder as she whimpered and jutted her hips out, begging for more. He was so hard it felt like he was about to burst right in his boxers.

"Color?" he rasped out, his voice barely working with his lustful gaze on her red tinged cheeks. 

"Hulk green. _Neon_ green,” she stressed. “Shane, if you don't fuck me..." 

Her shorts were yanked from her thighs and legs, catching on her boots, and she knew he ripped them when he managed to pull both them and her boots off in one urgent move. She went for his belt, but he swatted her hands away, unzipping and tugging before lifting her up by the backs of her thighs to push her back against the tree. 

Her legs wrapped around his waist and they both gasped at the simple touch of her flooded heat against his pulsing cock. Mia groaned. He was fucking thick and long and _Jesus Christ_ maybe those guys in pornos were real after all, because Shane could put some of them to shame.

He kissed over her jaw, her lips, until he was pulling her tongue into his mouth to dance with his own and she writhed into him like a feral cat in heat, back arching, hips bucking, and thighs squeezing in silent command for him to sink into her depths. 

So he did. 

That first push made her cry out, and he nearly stopped then and there until she nodded for him to keep going, telling him with her eyes that she trusted him. He thrusted again, then again, gentle until he was so deep in her he felt like... Fuck, he’d bottomed out, and there was still half an inch to go.

_Jesus fuck,_ that'd never happened before for her, never felt anything like the way he was pushing against her cervix, and it made her squeeze him like a vice. Her hands were shaking as she clung onto his back, knowing she was leaving marks.

"Fucking move, Shane..." she whispered.

It only took a few thrusts for him to start up a quick rhythm, his right hand holding her left hip tight to him as he pushed in and out while the other cradled her head so it didn’t hit against the tree with the force of his thrusts. Mia gasped and mewled against him, and it only drove him higher, but he kept strong. She needed this more.

As Shane tried to figure out how to hold her so she wouldn't get hurt but also do what he needed for her, Mia was already two steps ahead of him, her own slim fingers reaching between them to rub at her clit. Two strokes, and she was done for.

She orgasmed a bit differently than Sophie. Whereas her sister usually went quiet and tensed up with a silent scream on her lips, Mia arched her back and groaned deep from her chest, moving her hips and body through it pulse by pulse until she was whimpering against him softly and her body was pliant in his strong grip

The vision of her orgasming paired with Sophie's euphoric face from earlier and thoughts of the entire day of teasing from both girls had him releasing into Mia without a second thought. Thick ropes coated her insides for the first time in months, but for the first time it was with care, with want from both parties and not forced.

His forehead pressed to hers as they caught their breath, sweat mingling on their skin. Mia bit her lip as she came down from her high and felt him softening inside of her. She clenched down on him a bit, only for him to groan and give a buck of his hips against hers.

"Easy there, baby,” he murmured. “I think you've had enough for today."

He couldn't help the satisfied smirk on his lips as she groaned and nodded to him. He could see the exhaustion on her face as well as the rest of her body now. 

"MIA?!”

Shane froze, chest suddenly tightening painfully.

Oh, fuck. Oh, _fuck._ What the fuck had he just done?

Mia smirked at his visible panic, then kissed his cheek before gingerly lowering her legs, making him slip out of her. Casual as fucking anything, she tucked him back into his jeans then undid the buttons of his short-sleeved shirt and pushed it off his shoulders.

“Yes, baby sister?”

She stepped to the side, away from Shane, and pulled his shirt on. It barely even covered her thighs.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!”

And there it was. Shane felt a lump in his throat and completely locked up, unsure how to explain this, how to tell her what…

“I called shotgun!”

Shane did a double take, unsure if he’d heard right.

“We agreed to share, didn’t we?” Mia countered, walking towards her sister with a sway to her hips and wince in her thighs that shows he did his job.

Shane turned round to stare at her in shock. _Did she just…_

Sophie had her hands on her hips, expression exasperated instead of furious like he’d expected. “Well, yeah, but… I called shotgun.”

“And I’m the eldest,” Mia pointed out. She came to a stop in front of her sister and put her hands on her shoulder and cheek, making his shirt ride up to flash the curve of her ass. “You may not be there yet and that’s okay, but I am. So, I put the guy outta his misery, and me out of mine.”

Sophie shook her head in disbelief, but she wasn’t frowning. Wasn’t angry.

“S’your fault, anyway,” Mia teased. “He’s got the biggest hard-on for you I’ve ever seen, and I mean that literally."

Sophie blushed and ducked her head. Mia smirked, then glanced back at Shane, whose mouth was hanging open as he tried to comprehend what was going on.

“You two lovebirds talk it out or whatever you gotta do – I’m starving and need a bath." She flashed Shane a wink. 

Sophie watched Mia go, amazed by her sister’s lack of tact, then turned back to face Shane, who looked equal parts guilty, turned on and confused.

“So, I guess that cat’s outta the bag, then,” Sophie sighed. She stepped towards him and placed her hands on his chest, eyes fixed on his. “You know how I’ve always said we’d work as a trio? This was what I meant. You’ve been holding back because you don’t want to hurt me, but it’s okay. You don’t have to pretend you don’t want her. You can have us both. We won’t get jealous or think you’re taking advantage. We want that too.”

Shane had no fucking clue what to say, half convinced he must have been bit by a walker and not noticed. This had to be some fucked up fever hallucination.

“Shane…” Sophie murmured coyly. “This is me saying green. To me and you. You and her. There’s room for all of us, remember?”

Shane’s expression was still one of disbelief, but his eyes and the renewed tent in his jeans betrayed his desire, and it made Sophie smile.

“While you take your time processing that, I’m gonna go help Mia with lunch – fuck knows she’ll find a way to burn the stew if I don’t.”

Shane nodded numbly as she stepped away, only to groan when she surged forward to kiss him hungrily.

“My turn next,” she whispered, and then she was gone, all but skipping back towards the cabin with her ass teasing him in those tiny shorts.

Those two were going to be a fucking handful, but he was sure he’d find a way to cope.

He’d wanted them both for so long, and now he could finally have them. Three sides of a perfect triangle.

What was that saying? Good things come in threes?

He smirked. Damn fucking right they did.


	6. Exception (you are the only)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mia smiled, watching to two of them with a fondness that met her icy eyes. But then Shane grinned and gently set her sister down but kept her to his side before stretching an arm out, beckoning her to him with a gentle smile and wink of those whiskey eyes. How could she resist?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahoy!
> 
> Enjoy! xx

When Shane returned to the cabin, the twins were moving around each other with ease, passing bowls between them as they dished up the stew in a way that almost looked like a dance.

“Take a seat,” Sophie called over her shoulder. “We’ll bring it over in a sec.”

Shane smiled, then took up his usual spot on one side of the couch to watch the two of them lift the metal bucket of water up over the fire to heat, not even having to speak to be in complete synchronization with each other. It was familiar, yet new at the same time to see them move like that. Instead of only being able to steal a glance like before, he could now let himself stare them unashamedly, not feel guilty for letting his eyes wander over their curves and thinking about them in a way that wasn’t innocent in the slightest.

Sophie carried the used pot and spoon to the sink as Mia walked over to hand him one of the steaming bowls. He took it from her with a grateful smile, then raised an eyebrow when she flopped down on the cushion next to him instead of the opposite end of the couch like normal. She winked at him, then lifted a spoonful of the stew up to her mouth.

“Mia, that’s gonna be too hot,” Sophie chided as she joined them, perching on the arm of the couch and letting her legs swing over onto Shane’s lap. Shane stared up at her for a moment, taking in how relaxed she was, how comfortable it felt to have them both close like that, then let out a quiet chuckle. _Yeah, this was gonna work._

Mia rolled her eyes at her sister, but blew over the steaming liquid anyway before she ate it, humming happily. Shane watched how her lips closed over the spoon and had to look down to his own bowl so he wouldn’t let his mind go too far along that particular path. _Fuck._

“Think we’ll need to go for a run today,” Sophie said softly. “We’re running low on supplies.”

“Let me have my bath first, then we’ll go.” Mia was almost finished her stew already – she hadn’t lied when she said she was hungry. “I need to, uh… clean up.”

Shane smirked into his food, feeling a surge of male pride at the thought of why, exactly, she needed to clean up. Mia elbowed him in the ribs, none too gently, but he saw how her lips threatened to curve up into a smile and she didn’t seem to be complaining. Sophie laughed under her breath and shook her head.

She finished her bowl just as quickly as Mia did her own, then reached out to take the empty one from her twin. Mia handed it over, then planted a kiss on Shane’s cheek before standing up and stretching, Shane’s shirt riding high up her thighs and reminding him she was naked underneath it.

“Gimme maybe ten and I’ll be good to go,” Mia assured them as she moved over to haul the bucket of hot water off the fire. “Shane, you wanna refuel the Jeep when you’re done?”

Shane nodded in agreement, then watched her hips sway as she walked down the hallway.

“You heard her,” Sophie teased, kissing his other cheek before moving to bring the dirty bowls to the sink. “Eat up.”

Mia slowly stripped off when she reached the bathroom, feeling that bone-deep satisfaction that came from having the best kind of sex with the best kind of guy. It was like opening the floodgates – once she’d had him once, she wouldn’t be able to wait long before having him again. And again. And again. She laughed to herself, then carefully poured the hot water into the already partially-filled tub before easing herself in and sighing contentedly as the water lapped over her body.

A knock on the door came just moments later, but she knew exactly who it would be without having to ask. “Yes, baby sister?”

Sophie’s head peeked round from behind the door, sending her a sheepish smile before she came inside and closed it behind her. She fiddled with the hem of her shorts and couldn’t meet Mia’s gaze as she slowly moved towards the tub – a sure sign she was slightly apprehensive about what she’d gone in there for. Mia closed her eyes and let her head fall back against the edge of the tub, a small smile playing on her lips.

“Just ask,” she sighed. Sophie made a quiet choked sound, confirming what Mia had thought. “It’s okay.”

Sophie came to sit next to the tub, leaning back against the side at a right angle to her sister. She curled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arm loosely around them, then took in a steadying breath. “Did you think it’d ever feel good again?”

“No,” Mia mumbled truthfully.

“Me either,” Sophie replied. She looked up at the ceiling and tried to gather her thoughts. “I froze up when I went to touch him. I… I didn’t mean to tease him or-”

“He knows that,” Mia assured her. “He understands it, Soph.”

“Yeah, but… But I _want_ to want to touch him. I want to make him feel good, same as he made me. I’m just… I don’t know how to get past that block in my head, you know?” Sophie shook her head, frustrated with herself. “How did it feel? What… What’s he like?”

“You’re gonna have to be kinda specific, there,” Mia replied. “How much detail we talking?”

“All of it,” Sophie murmured. “I need… I need to know what it’s like, how it feels… All of it. It’ll help me imagine how it’d actually be instead of how I think it’ll be. Please?”

Mia played it over in her head, reminiscing about what had happened. The lead up. The rush. That anticipation.

“Before I get into it, you need to know he always checked what color I was on at every stage. Get that thought in your head straight away. As for the rest of it?” She smiled to herself. “Fuck, baby sis, I never felt anything like that before.”

Sophie didn’t move, but Mia knew she was listening intently, soaking up every word.

"He's gentle, even when he's not trying to be. Soph, he threw me to the ground with every bit of strength he had when he caught up to me. But he protected my head before it could hit the ground." Mia spoke, sitting up some more to start rubbing the bar of soap over the dirt patches on her legs from being on the ground.

Sophie’s chin tilted on her knees as she took in every word. 

"He'd been teasing me all day. Never going past that line, but always edging at it, seeing how I'd react, judging my reactions… and always, _always_ asking me my color."

The water was losing its subtle warmth, but Mia didn’t mind.

"I had to be the one to cross that line, Sophie. He was scared that I was afraid of him." Mia leaned forward, arms on the edge of the tub glistening from the water. "And it was worth it, every bit of it." 

"Is he… is he big?" Sophie's face tinged a rose red and Mia chuckled softly, then reached over and tucked a lock of her sister’s dark hair over her ear. 

"Yeah, he is." Mia saw the nervousness clear on Sophie's face. "But, Soph, when your body actually wants it? It doesn't hurt."

They’d spent too long in that freezer. Too long under the heavy hands of brutal men who didn't care about their captives’ comfort. The girls had been just toys to them. Pets they barely kept alive or fed, kept weak enough they couldn't fight back anymore when men took their own pleasure and ripped into their bodies. They’d almost forgotten that wasn’t how it was supposed to be. What those monsters did was assault, not sex.

"Shane isn't like them, sis." Mia reached up to stroke her sister cheek with her thumb gently. "He's nothing like them at all. You were the one that showed me that. Now let me show you how right you were."

Sophie nodded, but Mia knew she had more questions so waited her out. Her sister liked to think things over sometimes, a bit like her. Mia grabbed the simple bar of soap and went at her hair, wincing as the soap got into a small scrap on her back. Probably from the tree bark. 

"Do you... Do you think you could be there?" Sophie's face was beet red now, and she was chewing on her bottom lip, hands wringing at the laces of her boots. 

Mia raised a brow and looked at her sister. Though there were no incestuous feelings between them and never had been, they'd shared at least two lovers before the world fell. It wasn’t exactly new. Sophie kept Mia calm instead of wild and Mia gave Sophie the confidence she sometimes needed. 

"Of course, Sophie. Always." Mia smiled reassuringly at her sister, then took her hands in her own and squeezed. "Grab me some clothes while I dry off?" 

Sophie let out a shaking breath and pressed her forehead to Mia’s, overwhelmed with gratitude. She was relieved Mia hadn’t asked her to elaborate, to spell out what exactly she meant by what she’d said. She felt a lot better after hearing Mia’s side of things – it had confirmed her best hopes and dispelled her worst fears about how it would feel to finally give in and take that leap with Shane. He’d be patient with her, guide her, never push her unless she asked him to…

Sophie pushed herself to her feet and grabbed a towel from the rail to give it to Mia before heading outside to choose an outfit for her sister to wear. She flicked through their pile of clothes, then smirked as she found those cargo pants she’d picked out for Mia. They’d hug her sister’s curves nicely without being overly sexy, and it would drive Shane mad. She grabbed a clean tank top to match, then picked out a new outfit for herself.

“We should do it tonight,” Sophie told Mia as she handed her the outfit and stripped off her own clothes to slip into her one. “After this run.”

“You sure you’re ready?” Mia asked lightly, not condescending or challenging.

“Nope,” she replied with a smile. “I am ready to try, though, as long as you’re there with me.”

“I will be,” Mia promised. “But you won’t need me for long. You’re stronger than you think.”

“I hope so… Mind you, it’s not like we don’t work well as a team…” Sophie smiled, remembering just how well their twin bond translated to sharing lovers in the past. “The boy won’t know what hit him.”

“Baby sister, he’s definitely not a boy.” Mia smirked. “He’s all man, trust me.”

Sophie laughed, feeling much better about everything now. Her sister always could relax her. She hugged her tightly, then walked back to the main room to check on Shane. His eyes ran over her from head to toe as she approached, and she preened slightly under his gaze, knowing that seeing her in those dark jeans he’d picked out and the purple tank top she’d found bundled in with the rest of her stuff had affected him. His face gave it all away.

“We ready to go?” she asked.

"Waiting on you ladies."

He walked up to her, hand slipping over her hips and pulling her closer. His lips found her cheek, her nose, the small space between her eyes. The soft, affectionate kisses turned Sophie's cheeks pink, but then she cried out as Shane started tickling her ribs. The purple tank top slid up her sides as she squeaked and arched in his grip. 

"Shane!" she squealed out and pushed at his arms, gasping for breath as he laughed this deep baritone thing she’d never heard before from him. It was beautiful. 

"Easy, Shane. She's known to actually wet her pants if you tickle her too much!" Mia chuckled from the table, having walked in and left her sister in the trap she’d walked into. 

A warmth grew in her chest at the sight of Sophie so damned happy, an honest to God grin on her face as she gazed up at Shane. She hid the tears about to fall by turning her back and tying her blade to her thigh over her cargo pants, looping the buckle of the sheath into her black belt. 

"Mia!" Sophie squealed, and Shane stopped, laughing softer now as he wrapped her smaller frame into his thick arms. He planted a kiss to her forehead and smirked against her hair, filing that away for later.

Mia cleared her throat and took a shallow breath before smiling, then turned around and crossed her arms. She watched Shane's eyes turn a shade darker, creep up her body right from her booted feet to her tight cargo pants, then to her dark tank top and the ball cap on her head. The bill was pulled low so her eyes were almost completely hidden behind it and her shorter hair. 

"It’s the truth and you know it, Sophie," Mia teased trying not to let her voice crack.

Sophie groaned. "Traitor!"

"Oh, please. I know you like the back of my hand, baby sister."

Sophie raised her eyebrows at her twin, but Mia just smirked and tilted her head in the direction of the door. “C’mon. Sooner we get going, sooner we can get back.”

Sophie nodded and tried to slip out of Shane’s arms, only to laugh when his fingers dragged along her sides in one final attempt at tickling her. “Shane!”

He grinned as her hands smacked his away, then caught her wrists and pulled her back in for a quick kiss. She hummed happily, then pushed herself away again with a roll of her eyes, and this him he didn’t try to stop her as she walked away. 

A weight had been lifted from his chest that he hadn’t even known was there, and when Sophie threaded her arm through Mia’s, warmth filled it instead.

“Stop staring and start walking,” Mia sing-songed, smirking over her shoulder at him.

Shane rubbed a hand over his head and let out a gentle breath, taking a moment to absorb it all. How easily everything had just fallen into place. How everything and nothing had changed all at once.

He followed them out to the car and shook his head at the sight of Sophie riding shotgun. He tried not to smile, but failed miserably when she beamed at him and Mia’s head poked out the open rear window, a small smile on her face as well.

“Come on!”

He’d find something special for them on this run, somehow. Something to make them smile. They deserved it.

The journey didn’t feel like it took long even though they’d driven further out than usual. The girls chatted easily, to each other and to him, which probably was what had made the time pass quicker. They pulled up by a strip mall and hopped out the Jeep, Sophie quickly dispatching a stray walker that had been drawn in by the rumble of the vehicle. Mia adjusted her ballcap over her head and smiled proudly at her sister as she shoved the rotten corpse to the ground without even breaking a sweat. Training had definitely built up her stamina.

“Where dya wanna hit first?” Shane asked, coming to stand beside her and putting his hand on her back. She leaned back into the touch.

“Soph, what did we need again?” she called as her sister crouched down to wipe her blade on the walker’s clothes.

“Food. Toilet paper. New batteries for the flashlights. Stuff for washing up, laundry…” She straightened up and ran a hand through her hair. “A full restock, basically.”

“Didn’t realize we were running that low,” Shane replied, sounding a little shocked. He felt a twinge of self-deprecation for letting the supplies get that low. He wasn't talking care of just himself anymore. There was no excuse.

“Oh, we still have enough for a few days,” Sophie assured him. “I just figured it’d be easier to go for fewer, bigger hauls so we can keep track? I know it doesn’t seem like there’s many people nearby, but rather us getting the supplies than them, right?”

Mia nodded her head and hefted an empty canvas bag over her shoulder. There was a nervousness in her eyes, but she narrowed them to hide it and started walking toward the sporting goods store around the corner on her own.

"Mia?" Shane asked. Her movements paused before she looked over her shoulder at him. "You okay?"

"I'm fine,” she replied. “I'll go for weapons supplies - you go for living supplies. We'll meet up in a bit." 

She smiled over her shoulder at him and Sophie before continuing on her way toward the store. It was empty of people, but there were two more walkers in the place which she easily eliminated. Her feet took her through the dimly lit store, the high windows dirty from lack of cleaning or repair letting in just enough light for her to see clearly.

Her hands went straight for the ammo stores in the back. There wasn’t much left on shelves, but no one ever thought to check the back room or the drawers under the display cases. Her bag was barely half full, but it was loaded with army rations by the dozen, whet stones and blades, sheaths and holsters. A pretty decent haul.

She swung the bag over her shoulder and browsed the rest of the shelves. There wasn’t much. The glass scattered around the floor and piles of dead walkers around the aisles meant it had been scavenged before, but she scavenged what she could. People always missed things when they were in a hurry.

Her eyes strayed to the outer door, where trailers sat unused and left to rust outside in the weather. Her brow furrowed. _Maybe..._

She went and found Shane moments later. He was stocking up on toilet paper with two cart loads full in front of him, and Mia cringed. There wouldn't be enough room in the jeep for all those...  

"Hey, Shane? How big a trailer can the jeep carry without bein’ too heavy?" Her hands dropped her canvas bag and grabbed an arm load of baby wipes. She tossed them into another empty cart before reaching for another armload. 

"Maybe a ten-footer or so. Why?"

"There's a few out back from the sporting goods store. Thought maybe we could carry more supplies that way." 

"Smart girl." Shane smirked from the cart. "I'll go move the jeep and see which one will work best." He reached over to stroke a thumb over her cheek, and she leaned into it gently. "I won't go far." 

"I know." Her own hands moved up to grasp his one over her cheek and she darted out to kiss his pulse point gently, watching as his eyes darkened a bit more. She handed him the canvas bag of the weapons she could find and he smiled proudly before walking away.

While Shane found a trailer for the jeep, Mia moved all the shopping carts toward the meeting place they’d agreed. A few yards inside the doors, Sophie already had carts loaded up with dish soap, laundry soap, bath soap, all of it, and Mia was grateful. Smelling like men's soap all the time wasn't on her high priority list, even though being scented like Shane she did like.

"Got wet wipes!" Mia called and there was a gentle _'thank God'_ from Sophie a few aisles over. Mia smirked and pushed yet another almost-overflowing cart to the front of the store and slowed her steps.

 Women's health.

Her hands slipped over the dusty boxes of Kotex tampons, eyes closing as an onslaught of emotion comes over her. They were getting better, yes. Their stamina was good and they were able to protect themselves. But the long months of abuse had taken their toll on the twins’ bodies. They hadn't gotten to the point where their bodies resumed their menstrual cycles yet. 

"Sophie..." Her sister came up to Mia and both of them stared at the boxes for long moments. "Should we? Just in case?"

Sophie nodded and took a couple of boxes of pads, too. "We're getting better."

 _But not there yet_ , was quietly spoken to the other.  Mia nodded and placed the items in the new shopping cart, pushing it from her mind for now. 

They were healing. Yeah, they could fight. Yes, they got up every morning and trained. Yes, they lifted things and pushed themselves to get stronger, become more independent. But they were also near constantly tired and sleepy. And always hungry. Always felt almost starving. But there was no point in laying down in bed and sleeping. The world had ended, so they needed to fight every day to stay alive. And that was what they did.

Sophie watched her sister move away and sighed softly. She went back to the shelf and took every box she could find, because although it could be a week or a month before either one’s body decided to be regular again, there was no sense in not stocking up now while they could. 

Shane came back a few minutes later, walking up behind Sophie and kissing her cheek. "Got a trailer hooked up to the jeep now. We can take as much as we can."

"That's awesome!" She turned and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down to kiss him as her nails scraped at the soft hairs on his scalp. Shane hummed and grinned into her kiss, and Sophie moaned back softly. 

He pulled away just before things could heat up too much, his lips finding her temple before his brows furrowed and he reached into the cart. "You been needin’ these? Shoulda told me, sweetheart – I’d’ve got ‘em sooner."

"Well..." Sophie stuttered and took a breath to calm herself. "We don't need them now, ‘cause... Well, uh, we haven't, umm…"

Shane could tell she was getting flustered trying to explain it, so he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her close. She let out a sigh of relief and leaned into the touch.

"I get it. Not now, but you'll need ‘em at some point."

She nodded into his chest and he hugged her tighter.

"Get as much as you can find - we're gonna start stockpiling now that we got a trailer." 

Sophie nodded again and took a steadying breath before smiling up at Shane and kissing his stubbled cheek. "Better get you some shaving cream too, mister."

Shane rolled his eyes affectionately. She loved his stubble, and they both knew it. "What else we might need?"

"Well... Anything you need, really,” Sophie replied. “Razors, shaving cream, deodorant, whatever’ll be useful. I'm gonna start on food, if there's anything left."

"Alright, I'm gonna have a look at the pharmacy,” he told her. “Medical supplies are dwindling now."

He'd used so much of his limited medical supplies when he'd found them and hadn't really gotten much after that. He had been more focused on food and water than anything.

"Mia? Where you at girl?" Shane called gently into the store before leaping onto a counter of the pharmacy to see over the aisle, wanting to make sure both his girls were alright. 

"Blankets and sheets!" she shouted softly, waving a hand over an aisle top so Shane could track where she was. 

"Hey, get pillows too. Hell, grab everything, girls!" Shane smiled and spread his arms wide, like a King addressing his kingdom. Mia climbed onto the shelving unit to sit and look over at him, big grin on her own face. Sophie looked up at him from the floor in front of him and shook his head affectionately at his melodramatic move. He always made them laugh. "Take whatever you want - it's all yours." 

Hours later, the sun was getting lower in the sky with golden red hues flowing over the horizon. The windows were rolled down, letting a gentle breeze blow through the Jeep. The soft trembles and sounds of the heavy trailer behind it were the only real sounds as its passengers enjoyed the silence and the pride of such a great supply run. 

Shane's left hand was on the wheel, his right grasping Sophie’s over the middle console. Every now and then he picked her hand up, bringing it to his lips to give a gentle kiss to her knuckles. 

"Where you two from anyways? Originally?" Shane eventually asked when they were close to home. "I know you've been a lot of places."

"England," Sophie said pretty quickly, staring out into the scenery through the front window. "Well, we were born there, anyway."

"That lasted all of two months before dear old _Mum_ was kicked from the guy’s house and had to come back to the States," Mia griped from the backseat, tugging her ball cap down over her eyes. 

Shane's gaze switched from the rear row to Sophie beside him. There was a story there, one they didn't like to tell. He didn't ask any more questions about it, for now. 

"Where'd you grow up, then?" 

"Everywhere and nowhere," Sophie answered, turning to give Shane a small smile that didn't reach her eyes. 

"Tell him the truth, Sophie." Mia leaned forward some in the backseat. "Tell him that she toted us around like dolls, took us to dance lessons, all those ballet teachers, gymnastics coaches, talent scouts… trying her damnedest to make a buck off us if we ever got scouted."

She leaned forward more, her cheek laying against the faded blue of the Jeep’s passenger seat. Her eyes stayed on Shane even as he flicked between looking at them and paying attention as he drove. "Mom saw us as tools to get child support and workers for a free paycheck she hadn’t done a thing to earn. We were always just shy of perfect, and that wasn't good enough for her."

The rest of the car ride was silent. Shane had overheard some things one day the sisters fought and knew their mother was a tough subject they both just wanted to forget so he left it, releasing Sophie's hand to take Mia's into his own and squeeze gently instead. 

Once they arrived home, it didn’t take too long to get the Jeep unloaded. They parked the trailer beside the house and stored the gallons and gallons of fuel they’d salvaged in it, hidden under a tarp with tight bungee cords. The spare room slowly turned from a bedroom into something that was more like an extreme coupon user’s dream.

They stocked it high and full with supplies – medical, practical, tools, water, food… The kitchen pantry was nearly bursting with canned foods, sauces and pastas. Boxes of jerky were stacked up in one corner of the spare room with the army rations Mia had found. And that was just the start of it. It was enough to make a grown man cry in the world now.

The girls were in the main bedroom, organizing their belongings after having moved them in there from the spare room. It had been an unspoken decision between the three of them to do it. A natural transition. Why pretend to have any intention of sleeping separately from now on? They all knew that wouldn’t be the case.

Sophie was almost finished placing their neatly folded clothes in the dresser – pants and shorts in one drawer, tanks and tees in another. Sweaters and warmer clothes in the bottom. Underwear in the top. She smiled at the sight of their clothes together. Sophie’s on the left, Shane’s in the middle, Mia’s on the right. Same way they slept.

Mia was organizing their shoes and boots, lining them up on the wall by the bed. They always had a pair of boots by the front door for easy access, but having them almost within arm’s reach near where they slept was reassuring and sensible just in case. She straightened up and stretched, body aching from all the lifting and carrying they’d done throughout the day.

She glanced over at Sophie, who was done with their clothes now and looking inside the plastic bags they’d filled with feminine hygiene things. Mia came to stand at her side, unable to read her sister’s expression.

“What you thinking, baby sister?”

Sophie chewed on her bottom lip and slowly pulled out a box of condoms from the bag. Mia’s eyebrows shot up, unsure when her sister had added them to their haul.

“I, uh…” Sophie turned the box over in her hands. “I grabbed these.”

Mia said nothing, knowing why Sophie was so hesitant. The men had always used them, not wanting to _‘knock ‘em up and have another screaming little shit to deal with’_. Mia’s… _situation_ had been a result of one tearing, and they’d beaten her heavily for it even though it hadn’t been her fault.

“I don’t-” Sophie cleared her throat as her hands shook slightly. “I don’t want to use them. I know it’s stupid, but…”

Mia took the box from her and chucked it in the trashcan they’d found and put in the corner of the room. Sophie let out a sigh of relief and leaned her shoulder into her sister’s.

“We’re clean,” Mia said softly. “We can speak to Shane about the other part, see what he wants to do. Don’t think he’s that bothered, though.”

Sophie huffed out a laugh. “He definitely wasn’t when he had you up against that tree.”

Mia smirked, then pick up two of the bags as Sophie grabbed the others. “C’mon, let’s shove these in the bathroom.”

As they crossed the hallway, they could hear Shane dragging the couch along the floor and frowned at each other. They dumped the bags near the bathroom door and headed down the hallway, footsteps soft over the wooden boards.

“Shane?” Sophie called

They heard him mutter a curse. “One sec!”

He rushed forward to cut them off at the end of the hall, blocking their view.

“Shane, what’s-”

“Close your eyes,” he told them both. “Just… Just gimme a minute, ‘kay?”

Mia raised an eyebrow, then closed her eyes as Sophie did the same. “Okay…”

Shane’s hands took theirs and guided them further into the room. He squeezed once, then hurried away, moving something they couldn’t see.

Shane led them both a little more into the main room. It was warm from the day’s heat building up but Shane had a couple of the windows cracked, letting in cool air from the dusk time breeze. They could feel it on their heated skin.

"Okay, open."

They did.

Both sets of blue and green eyes looked at the furniture that had been moved around the main room. The couch was against the door. The table was against the corner, fireplace tools tucked neatly under it. The floor was empty, making the room seem a lot bigger than it was. 

They were confused at first. But then Shane sheepishly smiled and walked over to the table and revealed a CD player. A real, honest to God, _CD player_. It must have been battery operated since they didn't have electricity, because then he was placing a disc inside it, snapping the lid shut and hitting play. 

"I thought I'd take you girls out dancing."

And if Mia hadn't already felt for the man, she would have now. Sophie was clutching onto her arm with a white knuckled grip, tears welling in her green eyes as they looked at Shane with such bewilderment it made him bite his lip and flush. He thought they didn’t like it. 

"Shane, it's... I... " Sophie couldn't speak, so she released her sister and leapt at Shane instead, throwing herself at him in a full-bodied hug with her legs wrapping around his hips. She wrapped her arms tight around his neck as she peppered kisses over his cheeks, his nose, his lips… Every part of him she could read. 

As the soft country music played, Mia smiled, watching to two of them with a fondness that met her icy eyes. But then Shane grinned and gently set her sister down but kept her to his side before stretching an arm out, beckoning her to him with a gentle smile and wink of those whiskey eyes. 

_How could she resist?_

Mia slipped her hand in his and laughed as he raised their arms up and twirled her around underneath. She spun neatly into his side, years of training suddenly not seeming so bad, not with how he was looking at them both. He ducked his head down to kiss her with such tenderness she almost couldn’t bear it. Her free hand came up to cup his cheek, lips moving with his as she felt Sophie slip away.

The music rose in volume as Sophie turned it up and Shane turned into the kiss, wrapping his arm round her waist while bringing their joined hands up almost to shoulder height. He started to rock them from side to side, slightly off time with the song, and Mia leaned back to look into his eyes. He smiled at her, a soft thing even Sophie rarely got, and she felt herself grinning back.

He turned them on the spot, still rocking, and hummed along to the song. Mia caught Sophie’s gaze and saw the raw emotion on her face. She gestured with her head for her sister to come closer, then pressed her lips to Shane’s cheek before turning under their joined hands to swap places with Sophie, who took her place seamlessly.

“Hey, Darlin’,” he murmured.

“Hey,” Sophie whispered, one hand in his and the other curling round the back of his neck to press their foreheads together. They swayed more than stepped, eyes closed as Sophie breathed him in. His arm slipped round her and pulled her flush against him, his fingertips almost brushing the curve of her ass. Sophie felt a jolt of heat pulse through her and smiled.

She wanted this.

The song faded out and blended into the next one, which was a bit more upbeat than the last and one Sophie knew Mia would also recognize. She grinned, then caught both of Shane’s hands in hers and stepped back, bringing their arms straight before lifting one hand and spinning under it to stop with her back to his chest and their still joined arms crossed in front of her. She rolled her hips back against his in a figure eight and felt as well as heard him react.

She smirked, then reversed her movements so she was at arm’s length again. Shane pulled her back in and she giggled when he nuzzled her neck, stubbled jaw scraping over her sensitive skin in the best way. She pushed herself away from him and twirled over to her sister, eyes alight with mischief.

She saw the look on Sophie's face and smirked back before going to Shane and pressing her back to his front. She moved her hips against his, pulsing gently with the music and feeling how much he was enjoying it by the way his hands found her hips. He pulled her tight against him, leaned down and kissed over her neck where her hair bared the flesh to him. 

"Sophie..." Mia whispered and her sister came up, took her place against Shane's front while Mia slipped round to lean into his back. Her hands slid over his sides while Sophie's reached up and over to grasp at his shoulders as she gyrated against him. 

"You girls are gonna ..." he started, but his words fell away as Mia's hands reached around to unbuckle his belt, tugging it from the loops to toss it on the floor. 

The song changed to a slower one again, but none of them paying attention. Mia was unzipping Shane's tan cargo pants, fingertips grazing over the skin above his boxers. Sophie turned around to face him and slowly slid her hands down his chest, locking emerald green with honeyed whiskey that just grew darker every second the twins were touching him. 

Mia tugged his shirt up some, her fingers gliding over his heated flesh while Sophie's met the waistband of the boxers just peeking out from the opened pants he was wearing. 

Shane swallowed hard, shaking his head slightly even as his heart picked up into double time at the though. "Sophie, you don't..."

Her hand cupped him through his boxers quick as a snake, gripping onto him, feeling him in her hand, touching him... This deep feral groan came from his lips, one hand reaching back to grasp Mia's ass cheek in his palm and squeezing, pressing her body tight to his backside. The other cupped the back of Sophie head, fingers tangling in her hair to tug her up and toward his mouth where he growled against her lips.

"Bedroom, Shane..." Mia whispered into his back, lips teasing him through his shirt.

Shane nodded, bending his knees to slide an arm under Sophie's thighs as her legs wrapped around his hips. Mia took his free hand to tug him toward the bedroom, a mischievous glint in her eyes that made him smirk as Sophie worked her lips over his neck. 

As soon as they got inside, Sophie untangled her legs from around him and lowered herself to the floor, mouth moving to his as he found himself being pressed back against the door. He grunted against her lips, then felt her delicate fingers undoing the buttons of his shirt one by one from the top as Mia did the same from the bottom. He didn’t know where to focus, which sister to touch or kiss or…

Sophie grabbed his hands and brought them to the hem of her purple tank top. He carefully pulled it up as she raised her arms and groaned at the sight of her half-naked in front of him for the first time. Her breasts were slightly fuller than Mia’s in a way that told him she’d probably been curvier than her sister once upon a time, but she was just as tanned as her twin from all the outdoor work and it gave her skin a healthy glow.

“Fuckin’ beautiful,” he muttered, making her flush prettily. He pressed a kiss to her lips, then turned to do the same to Mia, who was busy trying to push his shirt off. “Both’a ya are.

“Says you,” Mia breathed, running her hands down his newly exposed chest until they reached his pants. Sophie started kissing along the left side of his neck again while Mia worked his pants down over his erection and to the floor, grateful he’d taken off his boots. It made things so much easier.

She left his boxers on for now, leaving that part up to Sophie, then joined the teasing by taking her place at the other side of his neck. He groaned, head falling back to give them better access as his arms looped around their waists, his fingertips toying with the smalls of their backs.

“Bed,” Sophie murmured into his ear, and he’d never heard that tone from her before. Not like that.

The twins stepped back and grabbed a hand each, pulling him toward the newly made bed with matching glints in their eyes. Mia pushed him down to sit at the edge of the bed and straddled him, mouth latching onto his as Sophie undid her jeans and shuffled them down her legs out of Shane’s eyeline.

“Fuck,” Shane mumbled as Mia ground herself down over the bulge in his boxers, more sensitive now without his pants to block some of the sensation.

“Later,” Mia teased, then reached down to pull her own tank off. He leaned forward and scattered kisses along her collarbone and chest, making her back arch up to him. He captured a nipple with his mouth and teased it the same way she had him.

“Darlin’, where you at?” he said softly, blindly reaching out for Sophie as Mia moaned and squirmed in his lap. His fingers met the smooth skin of her hip and he gasped, realizing she almost completely naked. Sophie moved into the touch, which felt like electricity on her skin, and let her own hand slip into his hair and tug his face away from Mia’s chest. _“Fuck.”_

“I think Mia has too many clothes on,” Sophie told him a little breathlessly as he stared hungrily at her body, gaze trailing over her hips to her thighs… her breasts. “You should fix that.”

His eyes locked on hers. "I agree."

Sophie let her teeth sink into her bottom lip, then bent over and pulled on his hair to angle his face up, kissing him with a hunger he'd only glimpsed before. His hands worked on their own, reaching forwards to unbuckle Mia's belt and tug down the zipper of her pants as Sophie gave him one final lingering kiss before straightening up again.

His fingers tapped at Mia’s hip, and she didn’t hesitate to move off his lap and slide her pants down. His eyes were on her, so she bent over, giving him a full view of her rounded ass and toned thighs. He didn't even see the scars on her flesh - he just saw her. And she loved that. 

Once Mia had finished her show, Sophie took her place on Shane's lap, boxers and panties the only barrier between them now. She stilled for a moment as she settled right over him, his hard length pushing against her through the fabric. Feeling him like that was different than over two pairs of jeans. It was more real… warmer.

Shane cupped her cheeks in his hands, makes her look at him for a moment. "Color, Darlin."

She rolled her hips and groaned at the feel of him sliding against her wet panties. "So green. Feels amazing."

She leaned into him as she started rocking her hips against his own. The pressure against her was heavenly, only heightened by his intense gaze as he watched her reactions, by the feel of his hand on her face. His lips meeting hers…

Hands travelled over Shane's back, making him groan.

Mia was on her knees beside him, driving him half mad with little nips of her teeth while her hands roamed over his tanned taut flesh.

“I told her how good it feels,” she whispered into his ear, teeth toying with the lobe. “Now show her.”

“That right, Darlin’?” Shane pushed Sophie’s hair behind her ear and shuddered as Mia tugged on _his_ hair, struggling to focus on the words coming out of his mouth. “Want me to show you?”

Sophie pulled back to smile coyly at him, her fingers tracing a path along his stomach and making the muscles tighten beneath them. She glanced over at Mia, who nodded encouragingly, then tugged her bottom lip between her teeth. “Yeah.”

Shane grinned, then tapped her thigh and tilted his head towards the mattress beside him. “Lie down.”

She climbed off his lap and moved into the middle of the bed, watching as Mia cupped Shane through his boxers and kissed him deeply. She let out a quiet moan at the sight, thighs rubbing together as the wetness between them became even harder to ignore. She saw Mia whisper something to Shane, saw his eyes flick over in her direction at whatever her sister said, and her hand found its way into her panties, fingertips sliding over wet flesh and sending a jolt of pleasure up her spine.

“Mmm…” Shane groaned huskily. She opened her eyes, unsure when they’d closed, and gasped as Shane shifted on the bed to kneel between her legs. His hands slipped up her thighs and curled round the waistband of her panties. “Let me?”

“Yes,” Sophie pleaded. He smiled up at her, then slowly pulled the fabric down her legs, giving her a chance to stop him if she needed to. She lifted her hips to help him, then moaned when he kissed the inside of her bare thigh, dangerously close to where she needed him to be, and lifted the other leg over his shoulder.

“Ooh, I wish I’d called shotgun on this,” Mia lamented. She settled beside Shane and pulled his boxers down to his knees, freeing him from their confines.

As Shane’s mouth worked its way up her sister’s leg, she wrapped her hand around him, soft skin over hard flesh. He moaned against Sophie’s inner thigh, and she saw her twin jerk in response.

“Please,” Sophie whispered. “Green… Green…”

"You heard her, Shane." Mia whispered into his shoulder, her small hands working him over causing him to breathe a bit heavier. Sophie bucked her hips up, silently begging for his lips to finish their slow journey. "Don’t keep her waiting."

Sophie's hands gripped onto his hair, trying to tug and pull him to where she wanted him, but his lips pulled up in a grin as he resisted her grip, teasing her and enjoying every gasp and whimper from Sophie as he did so.

Mia teased him right back, licking and spitting into her palm before running over his tip. Shane growled back at her and Sophie felt it vibrate against her skin, throwing her head back and whining impatiently. She couldn’t take it anymore, needed him so badly it was making her-

Biting her lip, Mia watched as Sophie shrieked into the bedroom, back arching upwards sharply and hands snapping down to fist the bedsheets. She heard the wet, hungry sounds from Shane as his mouth worked all smooth and tongue and teeth, heard the gasps and moans from her sister. It drove Mia half-mad with desire.

Her second hand joined the first as she worked Shane harder, half-contemplating crawling under him to suck him into her mouth… She dropped onto her back and tapped Shane’s hip, signalling for him to rise back up onto his knees more. He did as she asked without thinking and she slid underneath his stomach, lips wrapping round him as she sucked him into her mouth. 

Shane's head snapped up in a gasp, his hips pushing forward on their own as he grunted out a groan before diving back in between Sophie's legs like a starving man being given a three-course meal for the first time in years.

One sister was on her back before him and she tasted so fucking good… the other was half under him, bringing him nearly to completion with her tongue. He was in Heaven. It couldn’t get any better than that.

Sophie reached down to thread her fingers through his hair again and he knew she was close, recognized the tiny jerks of her hips, the way her breathing hitched… He groaned, gently nipped at Sophie's clit, and then she was gone, back arching and a silent scream on her lips as she orgasmed. It was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

Sophie felt her legs shaking as she tugged on Shane’s hair, too sensitive for any further attention, and when she looked down she saw what Mia was doing and groaned. She wanted that. She wanted to be the reason his face looked so blissful.

She sat up and kissed Shane passionately, tasting herself on his tongue and loving it, then pushed him onto his back. Mia moved in perfect harmony with her, not taking her mouth off Shane for a second, and then Sophie’s lips were working their way along his hipbone and…

“Fuck!” Shane’s hips tried to buck off the bed, but he restrained himself, even if only barely. Mia looked up at him under hooded eyes and winked, tongue running along his length before closing her mouth round the head and hollowing out her cheeks.

Mia reached out the hand not bracing herself on the mattress to take Sophie’s, squeezing reassuringly before guiding it around the part of Shane her mouth couldn’t take in. Sophie groaned, feeling him properly for the first time, and needed no further coaxing. They moved in tandem, a constant influx of sensation that made drove Shane wild.

His hand reached for Mia's head and he gently stroked his fingers into her hair. He made a gentle fist in her chestnut locks, trying to catch her eye and make sure it was okay. He desperately wanted something to hold on to right now, but he couldn’t risk crossing a line.

"It's okay, Shane," Sophie murmured as she nipped long his hipbone, her eyes looking up and answering for her sister. "She likes it."

His fingers tightened their hold and he guided her down gently.

"Fuuuck," he groaned lowly, and his head fell back as the twins gave him the most intense combo hand/blow job of his life.

His sounds spurred them on more and more until his fist suddenly gripped deathly tight in Mia's hair and moaned long and low, his body shaking as she sucked him fucking dry. Sophie's hands stroked over his hip bones and she peppered kisses up over his sweaty flesh until she reached his mouth, swallowing those manly whimpers still coming from his lips and throat as Mia sucked him right into another hard on.

"God-fuckin’-damn, girl!" he grunted as Mia slipped off of him with a soft wet pop. He glanced down to see Sophie nipping along his neck to tug on his earlobe with her teeth and Mia smiling this Cheshire Cat grin as she licked her lips, thumb coming up to catch a stray glob of cum before reaching over and letting her sister taste him. 

Shane’s eyes rolled back as Sophie’s tongue curled round her sister’s thumb, sucking gently as she let out a soft moan. He let out a helpless sigh. "Gonna fucking kill me..."

"Oh no, did we tucker you out, big boy?" Mia smirked as she crawled up to his other side and kissed him roughly, her tongue darting out to roll along his. She let him taste himself on her tongue, mixing with the hint left of Sophie. His hand came up to grip the back of her head, and he gasped into her mouth as he felt Sophie climb onto his lap, her fingers playing over his abs.

His eyes opened and a darkness swelled in them until they were black as night, hungry and wanting. "Baby, I’m just gettin’ started."

The feel of Sophie’s wet folds dragging over his length made his hips jerk, and he looked down at her with wide eyes. She was staring down at where she was rocking over him, her expression one of confusion. Mia followed his gaze and kissed his lips reassuringly before sitting back on her heels, knowing what was going through her sister’s head.

“Soph?” Shane breathed. “Darlin’?”

She tore her eyes away from between her legs and met his gaze. She bit down on her bottom lip and reached for his hands, bringing them to grip her hips as she braced herself against his chest. She leaned down to kiss him, soft and sweet, then rocked over him again. A quiet moan escaped her lips and he felt her smile against him.

“Told you,” Mia whispered, rubbing a hand over her sister’s back. “Different, isn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Sophie sighed. Mia smiled and moved back a little to give them some space – she knew how overwhelmed she’d been when Shane had taken her, knew it was a moment they deserved to have for their own.

Sophie pressed her forehead to Shane’s and rolled her hips in a circle, wetness sliding over steel. She mewled at the feeling of the head of him nudging her clit, heightened by him gently teasing her bottom lip with his teeth like she’d been doing to it just moments before.

Shane released her lip with a quiet popping sound, then kissed his way across her cheek to her ear. “That feel good, my sweet girl?”

Sophie nodded, fingers curling against his chest. “Want more.”

Shane groaned and dragged his lips back to hers again. “Darlin’, you gotta be real clear on what you want by ‘ _more_ ’ right now. I don’t wanna-”

Sophie lifted her hips and reached down between them, guiding his tip to her entrance. Shane’s words died on his tongue as tried to hold as still as he could, bringing one of his hands up to brush her hair out her face before cupping the side of her cheek. He kept his eyes on her face, watching for the first sign of uncertainty or discomfort that would tell him to put an end to it.

Her chest was heaving as the teased them both, running the tip over her clit and back again, letting herself get used to the sensation. She moaned softly as she settled him against her entrance again before carefully lowering herself, just an inch, onto him.

“Color, Darlin’,” he whispered urgently. The restraint it took to not bury himself in her heat… “You gotta tell me…”

Sophie rose up, then sunk down again, taking him further this time and watching the head disappear entirely. Her mind was blissfully blank and she felt almost high from it, absorbing the sensation of him dragging along her walls as she repeated the motion. “ _Fuck._ ”

“Soph…” Shane begged. Pleaded. He stroked his thumb over her cheek, coaxing her gaze up to meet his. They were heavy-lidded, almost unfocused, and her mouth fell open as she stared at him in something akin to wonder. “Baby, please…”

“Green,” Sophie eventually breathed once she could get words out. “Oh, my God, _green…_ ”

She felt her eyes well up as she lowered herself again until their hips were flush and he was as far inside her as he could go. Her body accepted him easily, all slick walls and tight heat around him as he filled her perfectly. It felt so fucking good, _so fucking good…_

“Shane,” she panted. “Shane, I had no idea…” She gave an experimental roll of her hips and gasped. _“Fuck…_ Shane…”

“I’m here,” he promised, pressing his lips to her open ones. His hand that was still on her hip squeezed gently, and she reached down to cover it with her own, guiding it to hold her more firmly as she started to rock.

“Mia…” Sophie reached out for her sister and grabbed at her forearm, pulling her in at the same time Shane moved his hand from Sophie’s face to Mia’s inner thigh.

Mia gasped in shock, not expecting them to involve her at all, let alone so soon, but all thoughts of protesting died when Shane’s calloused fingers brushed over her clit. She moaned, clutching Sophie’s forearm right back, and bucked against his Shane’s hand, feeling his palm replace his fingertips as he slid first one, then two of the digits inside her.

Shane kept his focus split between the two of them, never letting his fingers slow or lose rhythm as Mia moaned beside him even when Sophie started to rock a little faster, her tight walls clenching around him like the most pleasurable vice ever.

“Shane, please…” Sophie tilted her head back and Shane got the message, taking his hand from her hip and sliding it into her hair before tugging sharply the way he knew she liked.

Sophie keened, back arching as she sat more upright in response to the new onslaught. Her hips stuttered at the change of angle which made him hit all the best spots inside her, but he compensated with a slight thrust of his own from underneath her, and it had her mouth falling open wordlessly as she tightened up again. _Oh, she liked that…_

Her hand pressed against his abs for stability as they started moving together, him thrusting up as she pushed down, almost harsh in their urgency to reach their peak.

“C’mere,” Shane growled at Mia, lust-filled gaze turning on her now Sophie had found the perfect pace.

Mia instantly fell forward slightly to kiss him hungrily, like she’d been waiting for it. His fingers were hitting her g-spot now, and the whines that escaped her lips drove him crazy. “Fuck… Fuck…”

She was on the edge already, had been soon after they’d stated, and her nails dug into Shane's upper arm as she rocked her hips to the motions of his hand, little mewls and whimpers escaping her lips from the pleasure he was giving her.

"That's it, c'mon." He moved faster inside her, a third finger joining the other two as his palm pressed against her clit again. The sound of all of them breathing raggedly filled the dark bedroom.

Both of the twins were on the edge of release. Sophie was biting her lip as she ground her clit against his pubic bone with each downward stoke, and Mia was gasping for breath. Shane was almost there too, but was damned determined for them to get off before he did. He needed to see it.

He waited until Sophie’s head fell back and her hips twitched, then thrust up harshly into Sophie to tip her over, hearing her cry out his name as her walls clenched tighter than ever around his length. At the same time, his fingers moved faster in Mia, rolling his thumb over her clit until she let out a soft scream of pleasure, hips rocking against his wrist as she came down from it.

Sophie leaned forwards and braced her hands on his chest, hips finally slowing but not stopping, not yet. He shifted slightly and she whimpered, sensitive from over-stimulation even though she didn’t want to stop. "Shane..."

He shook his head, having felt how her walls spasmed around him when he’d moved. "It's okay..."

"No, please…" Her voice was determined and she rocked her hips again. “Please, I want it.”

And even though he knew she was sore from being so stretched around him, too sensitive still from her orgasm, she kept moving, pulling his hands to her hips so he could guide her how he wanted her. Her eyes caught his, and he was so close it only took one more roll of her hips before he grunted and trembled, releasing inside of her with a long groan.

"Fuuuuuck." He let his head fall back, catching his breath as Sophie laid on top of his chest, his length softening inside her. Mia curled up to his shoulder and side, and his hand found its way around her thin waist.

They laid there for several moments, catching their breaths and basking in what had just happened. Mia felt her eyes grow heavy and slung her arm over Sophie, who was trembling slightly against Shane’s chest. She could hear her sister whispering something, but had to strain to understand it.

“Shane… Thank you… Thank you…”

He kissed the top of her head and murmured softly to Sophie, the words too quiet for Mia to make out.

“My sweet girl… you did so good… that felt so good… woulda waited however long…”

Sophie lifted her head and kissed him, slow and deep, pouring everything she felt into it. She groaned in disappointment when her movement caused him to slip out of her, instantly missing how well he’d filled her, how amazing it was to finally feel him like that. All her fear, all her worry… It’d been for nothing. Mia had been right. When you want it, it doesn’t hurt. Nothing else gets to you, not even the past.

“Soon,” he promised, soothing her with another kiss. “Soon.”

Sophie nodded. “Please.”

He laughed happily and nuzzled her neck, placing a gentle kiss to where his stubble had rubbed it red. “You girls… you’re gonna spoil the fuck outta me.”

“We want to,” Sophie sighed. She kissed him one final time, then gingerly moved off him to settle at his left as always. She felt his release trickle onto her inner thighs and felt that heat stirring low again, but she was too tired, too sated to be ready for more yet. Her body wouldn’t be able to take it.

“Lemme go clean up,” Shane murmured, kissing their foreheads in turn before carefully extracting himself from their arms. 

Shane glanced over as the girls reached out, clasping hands over the space he’d left. Their eyes closed and he realized they were already half asleep, the gentle rise and fall of their chests showing slow breathing. His thirst hit him again and he moved to the doorway, the sight of a new object catching his attention as he did so.

The trash can by the door.

His brow furrowed as he leaned over it, spotting something the girls must have brought back with them from the run. A dusty-looking box of Trojan condoms. He stooped to pick it up, glancing to make sure both girls were asleep before walking from the room with the box in hand.

He cared little for his nudity now that what had happened, happened. He settled onto the wooden chair by the fireplace, reaching out to stoke the embers and adding a small log just to keep the warmth going through the night. He didn’t want to get up out of bed again until morning.

Shane stared at the box of condoms. He'd always hated the things to be honest, even as he’d grown up into adulthood. He’d a few scares in his high school days, but he was always careful with women he was with since, making sure they were either on the pill or that he pulled out so there was less of a chance as a last resort.

He’d pushed those precautions away with Lori without a second thought or regret. And it had resulted in something he'd always wanted but never admitted it out loud. Kids. 

But thinking about her, about Rick and his idiotic choices that cost Lori and the group and _him_ time after time after time… It made him angry. Rick had taken that chance of a family away from him, ignored Shane to do what he thought was right instead, and that group were most likely all dead now because of it. 

That wouldn't happen here, though. Not to his girls. He'd always protect them, no matter what happened. Come what may.

They'd made their decision when they threw out that box, so he did too.

Shane chucked the box of condoms into the fire. Watched the cardboard square disintegrate, then listened to the snapping and popping from the latex and foil wrappings melting.

He stood and left the remnants to burn, then grabbed a bottle of water and checked the windows and doors were secure before heading to bed. 

His girls were awake now, whispering softly to each other in a way reminiscent of children telling secrets. They looked up and moved to make space for him again. Well, tried to, anyway. Sophie was too sore between her legs and Mia was too limp to move much, but not in a bad way. Male pride and desire hit him like a freight train.

“Easy,” he chided when they refused to give up, crossing the room towards them. “I ain’t goin’ nowhere.

He took a gulp from his water bottle, then climbed onto the bed between them again. He offered Mia a drink, which she accepted gratefully, then passed the bottle to Sophie, who swallowed a mouthful before humming contentedly.

She handed it back to him with a sleepy smile and nestled into his side, head coming to rest on his shoulder as Mia settled on his chest. Shane looped his arm round her waist to hold her close while he downed the rest of his drink, then threw the bottle somewhere across the room and let his other arm curl over Mia’s shoulder.

Their hands came to rest on his stomach, fingers entwined together, and Shane couldn’t help but drop a final kiss on the top of their heads as affection swelled within him. He had no idea what he’d done to deserve either one of them, but still there they were, and they were perfect.

Sophie blindly reached behind her for one of the blankets they’d grabbed from their run and lazily slung it over their naked bodies. It was cool during the nights, but with three of them this close the blanket would suffice.

Shane adjusted the fabric so it covered them all, then smiled to himself as the twins fell back to sleep almost instantly. He’d worn them out, but they’d also worn him out equally as much. He settled back against the pillows and closed his eyes, excited at the prospect of getting to do it all again tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after that.


	7. Misery Business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Her movements were a bit slower than usual and she kept stopping to stretch her back or rub at her lower spine. His brow furrowed with more worry. Were they sick? Pulled a muscle from training? Had he been too hard on them last night? The possibilities stretched endlessly in his mind, and so did his guilt. Had he done that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Getting super close to that first chapter now!
> 
> Sorry for the slight delay - we wanted to get this one right for you! xx

Summer droned on forever it seemed. Days in the southern heat felt like weeks in an oven.  The trio living in the wood cabin were thankful for the shade of the surrounding trees, but desperately wished for an air conditioning unit that was powered by sheer will. 

But that wasn't anything but a pipe dream, and even though the heat was on some days unbearable, they still worked through it. Every day. No stopping. No slowing down. Always fighting to survive.

There were hundreds of saplings scattered through the woods nearby, and Shane hoped to use some of them to make a sort of fence he could erect around the cabin. He was tired of getting up every morning and having to walk a big perimeter just to check for walkers. If they had a fence of some sort, walkers would go around instead of ending up on their doorstep. 

That wouldn't have bothered him before, but now he's got his girls to protect. He knew they could take on walker after walker, knew they didn't mind holding their own, but it was his pride on the line. Proof he would provide and protect in every way he could. So, after making a rough plan in his head, he decided to get started. 

While he was in view of the house, his back bare and coated in sweat, he swung the axe again and again, piling up the saplings and young trees to later be cut into lengths and sunk into the ground. It was hard work, especially in the heat, but it would be worth it to add another element to security for their home. That what it was now – their home.

Sophie had found some books on gardening and canning food on their last supply run and wanted to start storing back for the winter. Even though they were pretty much set for it already, he wasn’t gonna complain because it meant there would be more food to fill their kitchen. And that meant there would be more for them all to eat and, most importantly, enough nutrients to put some much-needed meat on their bones. They were still unhealthily skinny, and he hated that.

The twins were currently trying to put that new knowledge to good use, but they’d barely done anything more than mark out where they wanted to plant because they were too busy arguing over what to do next.

"It's too late for beans, Sophie. We can plant corn."

"We have plenty of that already! We need beans and tomatoes, Mia!"

"Sophie! What part of too late in the season don't you get?"

Shane cringed a bit, glancing up from his work to look over at the girls. Although none of it had been directed at him, he’d noticed they'd been irritable over the past couple of days to the point they were both snappy and mean to each other. He didn't like it. They always worked so well together and solved their problems quickly that it was like they’d been replaced by Bizarro twins.

“Oh, stop acting like you’re such an expert!” Sophie snapped as she got to her feet, hand absently rubbing over the small of her back. “What the hell do you know about gardening?”

“Clearly more than you!” Mia retorted angrily. “Otherwise you wouldn’t insist on trying to plant things that won’t grow because it’s the wrong time of year!

“For fuck’s sake!”

Shane stopped his chopping to watch Sophie throw her hands up in the air, her usual cool head lost and replaced by a hot one that rivalled Mia’s. She was never like that. Never lost her temper, not even once.

“Why would we waste our time growing shit we already got by the shelf-load?!” she growled. “That’s like digging a fucking pond next to a lake!”

“No, it’s not!” Mia countered. “It’s sensible!”

“You’re never fucking sensible, Mia,” Sophie spat. “Don’t try and start now.”

“HEY!” Mia stood up, toe to toe with her sister. “Don’t you dare.”

“Or what? Huh? What you gonna do, big sister?” Sophie taunted. Shane hated the ugly expression on her face. It wasn’t natural. “You gonna try and hit me again?”

“Sophie!” Mia looked aghast but furious at the same time. Shane would never have expected her to be the one most in control yet, somehow, she was. “What the Hell is up with you?!”

Sophie shook her head in disgust and laughed. “Not nice being on the receiving end, is it?”

Mia’s expression softened as she reached out a hand, and Shane saw the moment Sophie’s face crumpled. She curled in on herself slightly, fingers digging in to her lower abdomen as she grimaced.

“Soph?”

“Fuck off, Mia,” she almost whimpered, then turned on her heel and ran back towards the house without another word. The door slammed behind her, a clear message not to follow.

“Shit!” Mia hissed, head falling back as she stared up at the sky. Corn. They were arguing over fucking corn.

“Mia?” She let out a weary sigh and looked over to Shane, who was eying her with concern. “You okay?”

She shrugged. “Fuck knows.”

Ignoring the ache in her body, Mia moved over and grabbed the extra axe from its place against a tree stump. Shane saw a twinge of pain cross her face as she lifted it up over her head and began chopping at another sapling just feet from him. He knew better than to push when she was like that, so he let her work in silence for several moments.

He couldn’t figure out why in the world Sophie and Mia would be at each other's throats that badly, especially over something as simple as gardening. They shared everything and rarely needed to talk things out, let alone argue over them. It was strange enough behavior for him to worry. 

His eyes kept going over to Mia. Her movements were a bit slower than usual and she kept stopping to stretch her back or rub at her lower spine. His brow furrowed with more worry. Were they sick? Pulled a muscle from training? Had he been too hard on them last night? The possibilities stretched endlessly in his mind, and so did his guilt. Had he done that?

Her breathing came harder now, but she shouldn't have been that tired after only downing a couple of thin trees. She was standing bent over, hands on her knees as she grimaced through a pain. He noticed how she gritted her teeth, trying hard not to show it as always. He couldn’t ignore it now, consequences be damned.

"Mia? Baby, what's wrong?"

He took a step towards her, saw her close her eyes as another wave of pain hit, and then he was closing the distance between them in a run. Blood was spreading down from the seam of her cotton shorts. He turned her to the side, ignoring her gasp of surprise as he knelt in front of her and gripped at the inside of her knee. 

“You're bleedin’." His eyes wide and fearful, mind full of visions of the last time he’d seen her bleed like that. "Mia, you're fuckin bleedin’..."

“Her too, huh?”

Shane twisted round to look at Sophie, who was walking towards them with a frown on her face. She’d changed clothes, wearing just one of Shane’s t-shirts and a pair of yoga shorts they usually wore for training, and her hair was swept up in a sweaty bun.

“Mia,” she said softly, holding out a wrapped square like an olive branch. “You’re gonna need this.”

Mia closed her eyes with a muttered, “ _fuck”,_ then took the pad from her sister with a pained smile.

“M’sorry,” Sophie mumbled, shame tinging her tone. “Didn’t mean t-”

Mia waved her off, then grimaced again as another cramp – she realized that was what those were now – twisted her insides. “Shit. This makes a lot more sense.”

“Yeah.” Sophie shifted uneasily, then gestured back towards the house. “I uh, I started a bucket heating. You can take first bath. I put the salts in there already.”

Shane pushed himself to his feet as Mia stepped away and kissed her sister’s cheek before slowly heading back towards the cabin, pain written in every step. She wasn’t bleeding because she was injured. She was bleeding because-

“So, uh… I’m a bitch when I’m on my period,” Sophie sighed self-deprecatingly, rubbing a hand over the back of her neck. “There’s that small detail.”

Shane sagged against a thicker tree and a relieved groan came from his lips as he scrubbed a hand over his face and hair. It wasn't another miscarriage... It was her damned period.

"C’mere...” he sighed as he reached out and pulled Sophie close, wary of her back now he knew what was going on. He left his thoughts unsaid, fear still creeping into his voice as he held Sophie close. “How bad is it?”

Sophie nuzzled into his neck, then stepped away after a second, bending a bit forward as a cramp hit her again. "Yeah, so, uh… I may have forgotten how fucking painful this shit is."

She grunted in pain, then tried to smile through it, but it came out as a grimace. Shane's brow remained furrowed in worry – he had no fucking clue what to do.

“What dya need?” he asked, closing the distance between them again. Sophie stiffened slightly as he wrapped his arms around her, then relaxed into him and slowly brought her hands up to touch his sweaty back.

“Dunno. Just... think I need space, but then I don’t fuckin’ want it and…” She took a steadying breath, forehead dropping to his shoulder as she tried to calm the mess of emotions running through her. “Urgh. M’sorry.”

"S’alright, sweetheart..." Shane kissed the top of her head and ran a soothing hand over her lower back, making her groan in relief. “That helpin’?”

Sophie nodded. Shane shifted so she was tucked into his side, then slowly started towards the house, keeping his hand moving over her back to relax her as they walked. His open, talkative girl had turned quiet and withdrawn, but he could still read her. Still knew her like the back of his hand. So, when she leaned into his touch, he knew it was more for emotional than physical support.

He guided her to the bedroom, then gently laid her down and sat down beside her, kissing her temple and brushing stray locks of her hair from her face and neck. She was a little clammy and definitely uncomfortable, even if she tried to hide it.

"Want the window open more?" he murmured. Sophie nodded with a quiet whimper, and his heart broke a little at the sound. He hated it. Seeing either of them in pain was never easy, especially when he couldn’t fix it.

He cracked the window all the way open to let in what little breeze there was from outside to help cool her off, then came to sit back on the edge of the bed. Sophie rolled onto her side and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Shane."

"What you sorry for, girl?" He shook his head, clutching her hands in his. "You're healthy enough now for them to come back. That's a good thing, Darlin’." She grimaced at a cramp and he did too. Never fuckin’ easy. "Scared the shit outta me with you two arguin’ and screamin’ like that, though. Ain't right you two to be fighting like that.  Y'all too close."

"That’s my fault, not hers," Sophie sighed. “I’m the one who lost it.”

"Just a little bit."

Sophie let out a breathy laugh, and Shane smiled before kissing her cheek. "Lemme go check on Mia."

“Yeah,” Sophie mumbled, nodding. “She, uh, she turns clingy like I usually am, so… She’ll want you there, even if she says she doesn’t.”

“You need me to bring anything back after?” he asked cautiously, not wanting to baby her but not wanting to just leave her to it either. He wasn’t an asshole.

“Please,” Sophie sighed. “Advil. Some of that herbal tea?”

“Course,” he whispered, then bent down to kiss the top of her head as she nuzzled against the pillows, curling up in a ball. “Be right back.”

“Mia,” Sophie reminded him. “Mia first.”

“Uh-huh,” he promised. He lingered a moment, hesitant to leave her, then scrubbed a hand over his hair and headed to the bathroom. He knocked on the door but didn’t wait for a response before opening it.

Mia was in the bath as predicted, head resting back on the lip of the tub with a forced calm on her face.

“Y’alright, Mia?” he called softly.

A pause.

"No." Her voice was small and cracked, breathing shallow and rapid as if she was trying to be but the pain was too much. 

"Baby..." Shane knelt down by the edge of the tub to reach over to cup her cheek and she leaned into it, a pathetic sounding whimper spilling from her lips.

Tears were threatening to drop, and he leaned forward to kiss them away gently.

Mia’s voice was barely audible. "Shane, it hurts so much."

"I got ya, baby. It's okay. I'm here," he promised. Her hand darted out from the warm water to grip tightly onto his wrist, her breathing ragged as she tried to not curl into herself.  "Let's get you to bed, c’mon now."

The pink colored water confirmed what he already knew. There was a lot of blood and it had to be killing her inside with the pain. He never wanted to see blood in her bath water like that again, not after that first time.

Her legs were shaking and she was weak standing, so he pulled her close to let her lean against his chest while he dried her off best he could. He reached over and started to slowly dress her in one of his shirts, a pair of panties with a pad already taped inside, and a pair of thin cotton shorts that were a bit baggy on her thighs. 

"C’mon, Babygirl."

Mia clung to his chest, her arms wrapped tight around his ribs as her body refused to co-operate. He let her stand and work through the pain until she was able to move, then slowly walked her to the bedroom. He carefully picked her up in his arms and laid her gently on her side of the bed.

As soon as he tried to stand, Mia whined.

"No..." she protested and nuzzled her face onto his chest, which was still a bit sweaty from earlier. He could probably do with a bath as well. Later, though.

"It's okay, it's okay,” he soothed. “I'll be right back, okay? I'm gonna go get you som’thin for the pain."

She nodded but still clutched onto him, burying her face against his chest. Shane looked to Sophie, who had rolled over to look at the two of them. Mia had never clung to him like that before. He was at a loss on how to react to this new side of Mia.

“Stay here with her,” Sophie sighed, gingerly swinging her legs over the side of the bed so she could sit up. “I’ll get the meds.”

“Soph…”

She waved him off. “She won’t settle. Best to just ride it out.”

“Are you sure?” Shane asked, but he could tell from the way Mia was clutching hold of him she was probably right.

“I’m good,” she deflected. “Hers’ll hurt worse, first one after a… it always does.”

She shuffled out of the room to get the pain killers and Shane quickly realized it was her way of getting some space. She was different, not quite cold but definitely not as open as normal, and he got the feeling she’d be the one to come to him instead of wanting him to go to her. It was rare, but she’d isolated herself a bit before and always came back when she was ready.

Mia, on the other hand…

“Easy,” he murmured, easing himself onto the bed beside her. She curled up into his chest instantly and shuddered, palm pressing down over her lower abdomen to try to stop the ache.

On instinct, he reached down and replaced her hand with his warmer one, slipping it under the fabric of the shirt so he could touch her bare skin. She moaned at the heat and pressure, brow relaxing slightly with the relief it brought.

“That helpin’?”

Mia nodded weakly, but her legs still curled up a little as the next cramp took hold. She’d had worse than this. That… That miscarriage had been worse than this. But somehow this felt harder to deal with, there was no moment of ‘ _thank fuck that’s over’_ to counteract the pain and make it worth it. She’d never dealt well with period pains.

“Shoulda got some heat pads, I’m sorry,” Shane muttered.

“I got them,” Sophie said softly as she walked back across the room. “Here.”

She held out a disposable heat pad she’d grabbed for that very reason along with two pills and a bottle of water. Shane took them from her gratefully, but Mia didn’t seem to be quite aware.

“She’ll, uh… She’ll probably want to you spoon her,” Sophie mumbled. “I’m gonna just… I’m gonna make a start on dinner.”

“Darlin’…”

“I’m fine,” she snapped, then growled under her breath at herself. “Sorry. Sorry, that’s not…”

“It’s alright, I understand,” Shane soothed. “I’ll be out in a bit.”

Sophie nodded, then headed back out as abruptly as she’d come in.

“Shane?” Mia groaned.

“I’m here,” he promised. “Got your pills.”

He helped her adjust her position so she could swallow down the tablets, then unwrapped the heat pad and stuck it to the inside of her shorts for her.

It only took about fifteen minutes for the pain killers to take effect. Shane curled up against her back, keeping a gentle fist against her lower spine. He softly kneaded against the pressure point that seemed to be the most painful. Her hands clasped tightly against his other arm under her head. 

Soon, her hands loosened their grip slightly and her breathing started to even out. Shane knew it wouldn't last long, but any comfort to her right now eased his worry for her a bit.

"I'm sorry..." she whispered into his forearm. Shane could feel the trickle of a tear running down her cheek to land on his skin and he smiled sadly against her hair.

"Hey, it's okay. You can't help it." His fist left her back to wrap around her waist, pulling her back against his chest and hips. He held her tight as a whimper of pain left her lips. The pain pills could only take away so much. 

She was near sobbing from it, her throat making little choking sounds, teeth clamped tight together. He knew she was hurting, and badly. He just held her tighter to his chest, curled more around her. 

"Hurts, Shane."

"I know, baby." He sounded just as desperate as she did, didn’t have a single idea on how to help her. He peppered gentle kisses against her neck and shoulders, trying to distract her maybe, just wanting to help her though it. 

She moaned gently, almost like a sigh, and her back seems to be less tense against his chest. He kept going, just gentle lips on her feverish skin. His thick arms wound around her smaller frame as he held her.

"Shane..."

"Mhmm," he hummed at the back of her neck. 

"More."

Shane stilled and leaned up a bit on his elbow, lifting a hand to cup her flushed cheek so he could see her face. "You sure? It won't hurt ya?"

She nodded, but then another cramp hitting her and she sucked in a breath. It wasn’t as intense as earlier, but it still hurt her. She took his hand from her cheek and moved it, placing it on her lower abdomen and gasping at the pressure and warmth of his hand there.

He leaned over and kissed her lips gently, pressing his forehead to hers as his fingers spread and he gently palmed her abdomen. She cried out softly at the pressure and he shushed her, nuzzling his face into her shoulder and neck. He could tell it was helping her because she started relaxing into his chest, so he moved his hand lower, just inside the edge of her panties. 

"Color, baby?" Shane asked.

She opened her eyes to look at him. "Amber."

His hand stilled. 

"No, don't stop," she whimpered. He wanted to move but held still, waiting for her to tell him it was okay. "Please."

Shane watched her eyes and face, keeping his hand where it was but letting it cup her gently, his palm applying soft pressure. She nodded just slightly, and he dipped his fingers further down.

Although it would gross out some men, Shane knew there was nothing gross about it. He knew women could get in some near extreme pain from cramps, close to childbirth in some rare cases. A release would help immensely with her pain, relieve some of those cramps if just for a little while. So, the blood? Didn't bother him a bit. It was natural – he never understood why anyone could think any different.

His middle finger sunk down and found her clit, rubbing gentle circles as she closed her eyes and arched against him. Shane ignored the blood pumping to his manhood. This was completely about Mia, about soothing the pain. He pushed her hair back from his face with his other hand and kissed her sweetly, watching her face for any sign of discomfort. There was none.

In no time, she was gasping softly, her hands grasping his wrist as she cried out into the dimly lit bedroom. Night had started to fall around them and a gentle breeze was coming through the window, cooling off her fevered skin. 

"Easy, baby. Good girl." He kept rubbing at her in slow, light circles until she was trembling. When he finally released her, every bit of tension was gone from her body and she was lax against him. "There ya go. That's my good girl."

Mia half-mumbled, half-sighed in response, but was asleep in moments.

Shane eased his hand out her shorts, careful not to wake her, then pressed a gentle kiss to her hair before slowly moving away from her. He hesitated when he reached the edge of the bed, checking for any sign of her rousing from sleep. Nothing. Just the steady rise and fall of her chest.

He let out a sigh of relief, then quietly left the bedroom, leaving the door open just in case before washing his hands in the bathroom. He dried them off on one of the new towels the girls had found, then made his way down the hallway to the main room.

Sophie wasn’t standing by the fire like he’d expected, though. Instead, she was by the window, staring out at their half-finished garden with an unreadable expression on her face. Shane slowed his steps as he approached and made sure his movements were loud enough for her to hear so he wouldn’t startle her.

“She okay?”

“Yeah,” Shane replied, coming to a stop by the couch. Sophie nodded, gaze still fixed outside.

“Can’t stand seeing her like that,” she murmured after a few moments. “It’s too much right now, after… after everything. And I’m too much of a hormonal mess to tone it all down and help. Just keep fuckin’ snapping at her instead and I-… I can’t.”

“She’s settled,” he reassured her. “The heat pad definitely helped. So did the pain killers you got.”

“They always do,” Sophie sighed. “She can’t make it through the first day without ‘em. Never could. It’s always the worst for her.”

She turned to face him and leaned back against the window, arms folded over her chest as she tapped one foot on the floor. She looked on edge, but Shane couldn’t work out what she needed. More space? Comfort? Something else?

“You hungry?” she eventually muttered.

He shrugged. Sophie rolled her eyes fondly, seeing straight through him.

“I’ll finish up making dinner.”

Shane chuckled and ducked his head. She knew him too well.

“Soup okay?” she asked, pushing off the wall and heading over to the fire, where a pot was simmering away. She glanced over her shoulder at him and he caught a glimpse of something in her eye that told him dinner was definitely not what she wanted to be doing right then.

“Soph…” He tilted his head, expression soft. “Darlin’…”

Her back straightened and her hand froze halfway through reaching for a spoon to stir the soup with.

“Stop.”

She shook her head and started to stir the pot with a little too much force, proving his theory correct. He slowly came up behind her and covered her hands with his, moving the pot off the heat so it wouldn’t catch before pressing his lips to her shoulder.

She moaned softly as her head tilted back and her entire body seemed to soften against his.

“What do you need?” he murmured. “Talk to me.”

“I…” Sophie closed her eyes and swallowed audibly. “There’s all this… Tension and I… It just makes me wanna…”

She growled, then turned to face him, hands cupping his face and pulling his lips to hers so she could kiss him hungrily, almost on the edge of aggressive. Shane gripped her hips and pulled her against him, taking that sudden fire for what it was. An urgent plea for release from the tension. An outlet.

She started to push him towards the couch, but he switched their direction until she was the one being walked backwards instead. The moment her back hit the wall with a thud, she hissed sharply, one hand fisting in his hair and tugging harshly while the nails of the other dug into his shoulder.

Shane groaned into her mouth and reached down to hitch one of her legs up to his hip. She hooked her calf round his thigh to pull him closer, then wrenched his head back so she could start leaving opened mouthed kisses along his neck. He hadn’t seen this side of her before – Mia was usually the one going at him like this – but he wasn’t going to complain. His sweet girl had the same fire inside her as her twin but she just usually kept it under tight control… until now.

She closed her mouth over one particularly sensitive spot on his neck and it made him growl, feeling her try to mark him. “Hey!”

She pulled back and stared at him, eyes darker than he’d ever seen them. She smirked, then leaned in and did again over the same point, deliberately ignoring him. He gritted his teeth, enjoying the sensation for a moment before fisting his hand in her hair to tug her away again. Her neck arched beautifully for him as he glared at her.

“What did I tell you girls last night?” he growled.

“No marks where someone can see ‘em,” Sophie said coyly, then bit down on her bottom lip the way she knew he loved. Teasing. Toeing the line. Testing. “Don’t want anyone knowin’ you got us here in case they come after us.”

“Exactly.” He tugged on her hair again and her eyes fell shut, mouth falling open in a silent moan. “So why you breakin’ the rules?”

She didn’t answer, so he squeezed her thigh roughly to make her eyes snap open.

“What dya need?” he urged. “Tell me, or this stops right now.”

“I don’t know,” she muttered. “I don’t fuckin’ know, just-… _Shane…”_

He slowly moved his hand from her hair to her neck and kept his eyes locked on hers as he applied pressure to her throat, testing. She moaned, the hand on his shoulder clenching tighter as he squeezed gently.

“Color.”

“Green,” she rasped.

His fingers curled a little more, just shy of cutting off her air supply. Her face flushed and her mouth went slack, eyes glazing over slightly. He smirked, then suddenly released her neck to crush his lips to hers, pulling her other leg around her hip as he pushed her even harder against the wall, pelvis grinding against hers.

“Fuck!” she mewled, clinging onto his shoulder for dear life as her other hand tugged at his hair.

“This what you want?” Shane grunted. “Huh? This what you need?”

“Yes,” Sophie hissed out as her back arched, thrusting her breasts forward like an offering.

He nipped and kissed his way down her neck until he reached the curve of the top of her breasts, then sucked a dark purple mark there, right over her heart. Her hips jerked against his and she cried out, making him chuckle darkly before recapturing her mouth with his.

“You like me takin’ charge like this?” he murmured, thrusting his hips against hers just to hear her moan for him again. “Yeah? You want it like this?”

Sophie nodded and wrapped both her arms around his neck, not wanting their lips to part for even a second.

“Oh, my sweet girl,” he cooed, then bent his knees and pushed her up higher until he could get a firm enough grip to support her weight as he pulled away from the wall. She tightened her hold on his neck and wrapped her legs completely around his waist, trusting him not to let her fall.

He walked over to the chair by the fire and sat down with her in his lap, kisses slowing but not turning any less passionate or intense. Sophie mewled as she rocked her hips over his, urging him to move with her, but he kept still and waited for her to react.

“Shane!” she growled, hands slipping back up into his hair. “Why you stoppin’?”

“I ain’t,” he teased as he kissed her again just to make his point. She whined in frustration, chasing his tongue with her own as he settled back against the chair.

“Fuck’s sake,” she muttered impatiently. “Shane, c’mon.”

He fisted his hand in her hair and pulled without warning, making her keen as her back arched almost violently. She let out a breathy laugh which turned into a gasp as he tugged her back in, foreheads meeting as he captured her gaze in his.

“Told ya I weren’t stopping.”

Sophie hummed and nipped at his lips, teasing him right back. He let her play for just a few seconds, then let his hand slip back round to her throat. She whimpered, a pleasured sound, and let her eyes fall shut as he squeezed again. _Yeah, she definitely loved that._

“Look at me, Darlin’,” he commanded.

Her eyes fluttered open immediately. She fucking trusted him, knew he wouldn’t cross that line even when she submitted to him like this. She could let herself go and not have to worry. It made him want to take her right then, right there, but he held back. That wasn’t what she wanted, no.

“Green?”

“God yeah,” she panted.

He leaned in to take her bottom lip between his teeth at the same time he tightened his grip on her neck, and she almost closed her eyes again. “No. Eyes open. On me.”

She sucked in a breath, gaze locked on his as he let his free hand run up and down her thigh.

“You wanna come, my sweet girl?” he almost purred. “That what’cha need?”

“Yes,” she whispered, nodding best she could in his hold. “Please…”

“You want it, you gotta take it,” he told her. Her eyes darkened again and he smirked, knowing that was what she actually needed - that element of control - even if she didn’t realize it. “Make yourself come.”

She stared at him for countless seconds, long enough to make him wonder if he’d gone too far, but then she surged forward, almost attacking his mouth with hers as her hips rocked hard over his to create such an amazing friction it catapulted him towards the edge within seconds.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, in awe of her as she pushed and pulled him exactly how she wanted, channeling that aggression and tension into something raw and sensual he’d never expected from her, at least not yet. “Yeah, that’s it… that’s it…”

She gripped the back of the chair with both hands, half-panting as she rolled her hips perfectly and her back arched, head falling back as she let the pleasure wash over her. It was way more intense than ever before, pulsing through her like venom burning her from the inside out in the most incredible way.

Shane reached out with both hands to support her back and teased her nipple through her borrowed t-shirt with his teeth, making her keen loudly as the stimulation on her already sensitive breast hit her like a jolt of electricity. She moved her hips in tight little circles, breathing starting to catch in her throat as her rhythm faltered, and Shane groaned deep and low in his chest.

“C’mon,” he coaxed. “C’mon… Take it.”

Her whole body seized up and the moan that ripped from her throat almost brought him toppling over the edge with her, the sound so primal and raw it called to the animal part of him. She was never loud, not like that. It made him feel wild with want.

“Yes, Darlin’, fuck… So fuckin’ beautiful.”

Sophie growled, barely taking a moment to come down from her high before cupping his face in both hands and kissing him hungrily, urgently, hips rocking over his length again. Shane grunted, unprepared for the onslaught, and he felt Sophie smirk against his lips before she slipped off his lap to kneel in front of him. She quickly unbuckled his belt and pulled at his hands to get him to stand up before unzipping his pants and yanking both them and his boxers down to his ankles.

“Soph-”

Her mouth was on him, all wet heat and pressure and tongue and _fuck_ he was at the back of her throat.

“D-Darl…”

She looked up and his knees almost buckled at the sight of her mouth stretched round his girth, cheeks hollowed as she kept the perfect amount of suction all the way along his shaft. She reached up with on hand to roll his balls in her palm, then grabbed his hand with the other and guided it to her hair.

He hesitated.

“Fuckin’ green,” she mumbled, then flicked her tongue over the head before sinking down again, letting it nudge at the back of her throat once more. She swallowed around him, and his fingers fisted in her hair before he could stop himself, just for something to hold onto.

She moaned, sending vibrations running along his cock, and he felt that coiling sensation, knew it wouldn’t be long before he came right down her throat.

“Soph… Soph, I’m gonna…”

She looked up at him, eyes twinkling with an almost smile, and he was done for.

“Fuck!”

She swallowed every drop with a pleased hum, then kissed her way down his shaft before taking the tip in her mouth one last time just to tease him. His eyes rolled back and his knees wavered, threatening to plant him on his ass.

“Damn, girl,” he muttered, pulling on her hair to get her to stand. “Fuck.”

She grinned and slipped her arms round his neck as she kissed him deeply, letting him taste himself as her tongue curled with his. He groaned softly, hands moving to her waist as her aggression slowly melted away, replaced with the tenderness he was used to, if a little more intense than normal.

“Oh, Darlin’,” he sighed against her lips. “Fuckin’ perfect.”

Sophie smiled and hummed contently, letting their lips move together for several more lingering kisses before she finally pulled back and let their foreheads touch instead.

“Gotta do that more often,” she whispered.

“Yeah?” Shane met her gaze, wanting to see the truth in it. “You want that?”

“Yeah,” she confessed. “Yeah, I… I like that. A lot.”

Shane swallowed. “It doesn’t, uh…”

“God, no,” Sophie sighed with a shake of her head. “Shane, you could never… It’s so _different_ with you. You-” Her voice cut out and she cursed her hormones from making her emotions flip so quickly. She wasn’t upset, damnit. “You have no idea how much I love being with you. You’ll never know how much I… How much this…”

His lips met hers in a gentle kiss that had her moaning softly.

“The two of you are everythin’,” he whispered. “So whatever you need? Whatever you wanna try? Just say the word and it’s yours. _I’m_ yours.”

Sophie smiled, too overcome to speak.

“C’mon.” He kissed her forehead. “Think it’s time you had that bath.”

Once Sophie was settled in the tub and sighing happily, Shane went back to check on Mia in the main bedroom. She was curled up against his pillow, just like she had been when he left, but the moment he entered the room she started to try sitting up with a grimace.

“Shane…”

"Stay still, baby." He walked quickly over to the bed where Mia had rolled to her other side and was reaching out for him.

He moved to crawl back into the bed, tugging his pants down and leaving him in boxers as he crawled towards Mia. She had this look on her face that could only be described as a pout, and it looked so damned cute on her Shane couldn't help but kiss her lips. 

"You doin okay?"

She shook her head and he pulled her to his chest, cradling the back of her neck as she breathed in his scent of sweat and…

"You smell like sex… Did you fuck my sister?" She leaned back, all raised eyebrows and this look of questioning in her eyes.

Shane was almost taken aback at the expression on her face. _Maybe during this time of the month they suddenly got jealous?_

"A bit, yeah…" he admitted cautiously.

She just looked at him, gave him a curt nod and then settled back under his chin. "Good. She's cranky as fuck without it."

_What the hell just happened?_

He shook it off. They seemed to flip, utterly and completely, their personalities.

"What about you, baby?"

She tilted her head back again, looking at him with clear blue eyes, the iciness gone for the moment and replaced with warmth. She shook her head, kissing his jaw with those soft lips of hers and curled against him once more. Her arms slipped around his bare chest, soft dark hairs brushing against her fingers. She was curled against him like a cat, clinging with every limb, nails just a shade before cutting, every inch of her nestled into him.

Shane realized he liked this side of Mia. Just like he liked the more dominant side of Sophie. Light and shade.

Mia gave a small whimper as a cramp hit her, and Shane ran his hand over her lower spine to ease the ache. Her quiet cries of pain hurt him just as much. _Never fuckin’ easy._

"S'alright, I gotcha."

Mia clung to him until the pain faded once again and she went limp against him, too tired to do much else.

“Room for one more? I brought some soup?”

Sophie looked softer, now. Tentative and almost vulnerable. A complete one-eighty from the woman that had just pinned him down and taken what she wanted from him. Her hair was down from its bun and falling in damp waves around her face, and she hovered by the door like she wasn’t sure she’d be allowed, or that she was disturbing them. As if Shane would ever say no.

“C’mon, sweetheart.” He reached out a hand to beckon her forward and she didn’t hesitate to cross the room towards him, letting out a long, shaking breath of relief. She placed the bowls on the table beside the bed and sat next to him, facing him instead of curling up into his side like Mia was. He reached out and took hold of one of her hands, and she smiled weakly, squeezing back before gazing over at her sister.

“You okay, Mia?” she asked quietly, unsure if her twin was awake or not.

“Hurts,” Mia replied as she burrowed her face against Shane’s chest.

“Is it…” Sophie hesitated, then reached out to stroke Mia’s hair off her face. “Is this worse than…”

“S’different.” Mia opened her eyes, and it made Sophie’s already questionable control over her emotions waver even more. “S’a different pain to the… the miscarriage.”

Shane tensed slightly and both twins felt it.

“Shane?” Mia frowned, tilting her head so she could look up at him.

“ _Of course_ ,” Sophie whispered. “That’s why you looked so terrified earlier."

Mia looked to her sister, confused. She hadn’t seen Shane’s face, too busy wondering what the fuck was going on with her body to focus on anything else. _Fuck._ “You thought I was miscarrying?”

Shane hesitated. He’d been fine with their silent decisions, but when he thought he’d been faced with a consequence of that decision, of course it had scared him. At that moment, he’d known they’d have to talk about it somehow. He just had no fucking clue on how to start the conversation until now. “Uh… Well, uh… We ain’t been careful, so… at first…”

“Oh, fuck,” Sophie mumbled, suddenly feeling unbelievably guilty. “This is my fault.”

“Soph-”

“I found a box of condoms,” Sophie blurted. “But I didn’t wanna use ‘em ‘cause… ‘cause I just didn’t want to, and then… We threw ‘em out. I didn’t even… I’m sorry, I should have given you more of a choice, I was gonnna talk to you but I got dist-”

Shane squeezed her hand tightly. “I burned em.”

Sophie’s head snapped up, eyes wide with surprise. _“What?”_

“I burned em,” Shane repeated. “The condoms. I saw ‘em, and I burned ‘em. So that ain’t on you. I didn’t want’m either.”

“Oh.” Sophie blinked. They’d already kind of established that, but there was a difference between not thinking of something and consciously making a decision. “But… That was before. Right? Before we… Before _this_ …”

“Doesn’t change anythin’,” Shane replied. “Not for me.”

Sophie didn’t know how to interpret that. Did that mean he wanted that to happen? Or did it just mean he thought that was a risk worth taking? “So you don’t care that…”

“’Course I fuckin’ care,” Shane sighed, scrubbing a hand over his head. This wasn’t how he’d imagined this going. “But if that happened? If either one of you got… if you were…”

“Pregnant,” Mia said. “You can say it. If either one of us got pregnant? Then what?”

“We’d deal with it,” he replied simply. Like it was the easiest thing in the world.

“We’d _deal_ with it?” Sophie frowned. “Shane, if we had a baby, that would… That’d be… it would change _everything_ , that’s not just… that’s not something you just… _deal_ with.”

Shane growled under his breath, kicking himself for not getting the words out right. “No, I… I _know that._ ”

“Of course you do,” Mia murmured, giving him a break from Sophie’s panicked inquisition. She grabbed Sophie’s hand to stop her from bolting. She knew her sister’s reaction was more due to hormones than anything else. “Lori.”

Shane froze so suddenly it caught Mia off guard and she actually shrunk back a bit, sitting up despite the terrible ache in her abdomen and back to look at Shane, who sat staring at the opposite wall with a look of pure rage and anger on his features. For the first time ever, Mia wanted to run.

"How... How you know about her?" Shane voice was rough, emotion-filled and angry. Whether he was angry at her, she didn't know, but Mia reached out for her sister’s hand anyway and Sophie squeezed right back.

"I... I… You talk in your sleep sometimes... Wakes me up..." she mumbled softly, looking down to the bed as she leaned away from him and into Sophie, no longer in Shane's lap.

Shane shook his head and sighed, reaching back for Mia and feeling thankful that she didn't instantly flinch in response to his touch. He knew his silent reaction had frightened her to some degree and he’d never wanted that. Not from Mia, especially. He settled her back into his lap, a tether to keep him calm and grounded in the present, not the past.

"Lori, uh... Lori was my best friend’s wife..."

Sophie settled closer on the bed, sitting with her legs folded under her and her hand absently rubbing at her abdomen as they both listened to Shane intently but without judgement. 

Shane lifted his shirt, revealing that jagged pink line over the right side of his abs. Mia's fingers reached out and ran over it. The skin was ridged and thick where it had been stitched lopsided. 

"Rick, he, ah... He was supposed to be dead... He found out I knocked her up..." His hand laid over Mia's on the scar as looked up to Sophie's eyes, taking strength from her understanding gaze. "Rick stabbed me and left me in a field. Took the group and Lori, and I ain't seen ‘em since."

Mia sat up a bit, leaned into the cradle of his left arm as he held her close to his side and lap. Shane kissed her temple, then reached out for Sophie's hand and pulled her to the right so she was closer.

"That group you told me about… the ones who didn't agree with how you protected them?" Mia asked and Shane nodded. Sophie had been asleep that night all those months ago, but could read between the lines. Knew there had to have been a reason he was all on his own. Why he didn’t speak about any of the people in his life.

"She was pregnant. And I, I was gonna be there as much as she'd let me but... When Rick came back, she turned cold and pushed me away. Told me to leave her alone and that the baby wasn’t mine." His voice cracked, and he leaned to the side, burying his face in Sophie's neck. Sophie carded her fingers through his hair as Mia curled into his lap, both of them soothing him in their own way. 

Shane took a moment to regroup and exhaled a long, slow breath, lips brushing over Sophie's temple and then her twin’s. _His girls._

What happened to Lori and with Rick? That was on him. That was his impulsiveness and weak mind pitted against someone who wanted to play games with him and fuck with his head. But that would never happen with these two. Not his girls.

They weren’t Lori, and there was no one to take them from him. No one to come in and sway them to leave him or hurt him. He knew they trusted him implicitly like he trusted and was loyal to them. No one could take them from him. If they left, it would be their decision alone, but he knew that wouldn’t happen. They were there because they wanted to be. Had proved that time and time again.

Nothing would change if they did become pregnant. He'd be just as protective, just as possessive and always provide for them. Always take care of them. And maybe… maybe he didn't hate the idea of them pregnant.

"You girls are everythin’ to me… You’re everythin’." He pulled them both closer, looking from blue to green and back, wanting his point to be made. "Anything happens, either one of you end up pregnant? I'll take care of ya. Never doubt that. _Never._ "

Sophie nodded in understanding. He wouldn’t deliberately try to get them pregnant, but if he did, he would look after both them and the baby. Same way neither of them wanted to be pregnant, but were willing to risk it. They were on the same page.

She traced the jagged line of his scar with a fingertip, suddenly feeling closer to him than ever now she understood its story. He’d let them both in. Opened up. She appreciated why he hadn’t done so before – even now the two of them were still triggered by any hint of unexpected violence, and it had taken a lot for him to control his reaction to the mention of Lori’s name.

But that anger she’d seen flash across his face? It didn’t scare her because she understood what caused it. It was a rage born from loving someone with all your heart, and having something happen to them. From trusting someone and having them betray you in the worst way. She felt that every time she thought of that freezer. Of Mia.

“I’m sorry for what I said,” she whispered. “I had no idea.”

“I never wanted you to,” Shane replied softly. “That guy… The person I was around her? That’s my monster. My darkness. You girls deserve better.”

“We’re not scared of you,” Mia reminded him. “You’re not the type to blow up without a reason – we know that. You don’t have to hide from us. Or yourself.”

“You didn’t see what I was like,” Shane countered. “Drove me half outta my fuckin’ mind. I did a lot of shit I shouldn’t’ve.”

“That group was toxic.” Mia cupped his cheek in her hand. “I don’t think a saint could’ve stayed sane in that situation. I’ve told you this already.”

He sighed. “Mia-”

“We _trust_ you,” Mia whispered as she pressed her forehead against his. “Every part of you. We’re yours, remember?”

Shane let out a quiet groan as Mia kissed him, just like she had the night he’d told her about Rick and that group. She had embraced the darkness then, too. He held Mia’s gaze for several long moments and Sophie watched a silent conversation pass between them. She didn’t know that particular story either, but she didn’t need to. If Mia wasn’t worried, neither was she.

Shane eventually nodded to Mia, then looked over to Sophie, who didn’t hesitate to press her lips to his.

“She’s right, you know,” the younger twin murmured. “You’re ours, too. But enough with the heavy. I’m way too hormonal for this - it’s making me simultaneously want to fuck you and cry so… Soup?”

Shane laughed fondly and kissed her again, feeling like that band across his chest had loosened slightly. “Sure. Why not?”

Once they’d all eaten in comfortable calm, the girls fell fast asleep, having taken another pain killer to keep the edge off just so they could get a bit of much needed rest. Shane held them close for a long time, staring off to the opposite wall for maybe hours until the need to move kicked in.

After checking both of them, he carefully slipped from the bed, tucking his pillow between them in case they looked for him in their sleep. His bare feet padded into the main room, where he sat down in the wooden chair heavily and stared at the glowing embers.

He'd loved Lori, with everything he had and everything he didn't. Had taken care of her and protected her for months before Rick came back from the dead and threw a wrench into Shane's life.

He couldn't exactly blame his friend for doing what he had, for pushing him away. After all, as far as he was concerned, his best friend had slept with his wife and knocked her up because of it. There was no discussion, no chance at an explanation… Back then, Shane would have stepped back if Rick had only asked.

Instead, Rick had said nothing and that let Lori make his mind weak after only a short time. She’d fucked him up in the head, pulling him into the shadows and telling him she loved him, then screaming at him to stay away from her and Carl like he was a walker himself in the light. Back and forth it went, but Shane was too screwed up to care or try to stop it.

By the end, when that herd had threatened the farm, Shane was almost glad of it, thinking he'd just get bitten or killed trying to protect them, and that would be the end of everyone's worry about crazy Shane.

But Lori had gone to her husband, convinced him to kill Shane because he was a danger to everyone, to Carl, to the baby that wasn't Rick’s. She’d refused Shane that biological right so easily it had killed him. How could she have done that to him after all he'd done for her? How could Rick have listened to her?

Questions and half answers swirled in his head as he added a small log to the fire and watched it burn. None of it mattered now. Not a single thing. 

With Rick trying to be a good man, making choices that got people killed, not willing to do whatever it took to keep others safe by killing the bad to survive and protect the good… it had more than likely gotten them all killed. 

So Shane leaned forward and let a few stray tears fall. He grieved, just for a moment. Grieved because, in his head, they were all dead and gone, and if they weren’t... he wouldn't even think it because there was no way in hell he'd ever find them if he went looking. And what would be the point, anyway? His girls in that bedroom needed him more than Lori ever did or made him think she did.

Mia and Sophie were his life now. They trusted him. Were loyal to him. Didn't want to hurt him or play games to mess with him. They simply wanted to be there with him. Not just survive but _live_ together, too.

Fuck.

He loved ‘em. Loved ‘em both.

He scrubbed his hand over his face, ridding himself of the last traces of what was and what could have been. He didn’t need anything else, not anymore. He had everything he wanted within the four walls of that cabin. They were more than enough.

He got to his feet and headed back to the bedroom, feeling so much lighter now that band crushing his chest was gone. He no longer had to carry the weight of that suppressed grief or the burden of hiding the monstrous side of him he kept buried. It was time he trusted them with the completeness they did him. They could take it. He’d been a fool to think otherwise. They weren’t broken – they were the strongest people he’d ever known.

The girls had shifted in their sleep, rolling towards where he’d placed his pillow. He wouldn’t be able to climb up the middle of the bed, not how they were laying, so he moved round to Sophie’s side of the bed instead since he didn’t want to risk moving Mia from her comfortable position. He carefully extracted the pillow out from under the girls’ hands, then planted one knee on the mattress beside Sophie so he could climb over her to get to the middle.

He managed to get his second knee down on the other side of her before she awoke with a quiet moan, rolling onto her back and blinking sleepily up at him as she realized what he was trying to do. She smiled, then lazily reached up to cup his face and pull him down to her. Her kiss was warm, soft from sleep, but she didn’t push for more than that, letting him settle on his back next to her instead.

She immediately curled into him, head on his chest, hand resting over his scar. Shane kissed the top of her head, then huffed out a laugh as Mia grumbled and slung her arm over his waist but didn’t rouse from sleep any more than that. Shane smiled and wrapped his arms around them, holding them close as always. _Yeah, more than enough._


	8. How Am I Supposed To Feel (when you're not here)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Mia went to hop into the Jeep, her eyes caught sight of something on the pavement, covered in trash and blood and dirt and broken glass. A backpack. A backpack that was definitely not there when they’d left the Jeep earlier to go inside.
> 
> Without thinking about it, she grabbed it and tossed it onto the floorboard at her feet before slamming the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, you may have noticed chapter one has disappeared... Have no fear, it'll be back all shiny and polished!
> 
> When we started this monster, it was meant to be a one-shot, but then plot came along and... Well, you're reading the rest!
> 
> This chapter is a beast, but we hope you like it! The next one will be out soon xx

As Summer drew to a slow close, the heat finally relented and the days became a bit easier to cope with for all three of them. The fence was now finished and they’d set up various trigger points past their perimeter as an early warning system. The girls had finished their garden – they’d planted both corn _and_ beans along with other plants they could, and had worked out a system to manage its upkeep easily.

It worked, and so did the trio. Shane had opened up to them a little more on the quieter nights they laid in bed together. He was never going to be one to talk things to death, but the little snippets he let them in on - the happier times and the worst – filled in the gaps he’d deliberately left to protect himself.

And the girls, in turn, had even spoken about their mother a little, though those conversations were few and far between. No point focusing on the bad when there was plenty of good in their lives now. The color system was needed less and less frequently, too, as they both became more comfortable in themselves as well as Shane. It had reached the point where the only time either one of them had been ready to say ‘ _amber’_ in weeks, he had already read their bodies and slowed down accordingly. They _worked._

But then Mia’s next period came. The cramps were awful, but less so than before, and both Shane and Sophie had picked up on the warning signs a few days before and were prepared with heat pads and baths to soothe her. The girls were so in sync with each other that they were never more than half a day shy of having perfectly matching cycles - it had been that way ever since they’d gotten their first periods at the age of thirteen on their lunchbreak at school. Which was why, when Sophie’s period didn’t come on the first day of Mia’s… or the second… or the third… or the fourth… she should have realized it was odd.

Instead, she kept up her usual routine of tending to the garden, cooking their meals, training with Shane while Mia shouted instructions from the sidelines… Her body was more sensitive, though – that much she did notice. How could she not, when Shane was looking at her all predatory as he tried to taunt her into attacking him and unleashing the inner animal she usually kept under tight control. She still struggled with going on the offensive against him, even though he could take the hits, but right now she was battling with lust, not anxiety, and it was making her lose focus.

“C’mon, girl, what’chu waitin’ for? I’m right here, go on.”

Sophie rolled her neck and shook the tension from her shoulders, trying to concentrate on what Mia was saying instead of the look in Shane’s eyes.

“Stop thinking – just do it!” Mia huffed.

“Yeah, c’mon,” Shane urged. “Y’scared or somethin’?”

Sophie clenched her jaw and let her fingers curl into fists. _Fuck it._

She swung. He deflected.

He lunged. She jabbed an uppercut into his ribs.

He hunched over.

She spun and threw her calf into his side, hips and feet moving in unison to get enough power…

Shane caught her leg and pulled, yanking her off her feet and swinging her around to throw her to the ground. He didn’t give her time to even register her new position before planting himself on her back with his full weight and pinning her wrists down beside her head.

Sophie hissed in frustration and tried to slip out from beneath him but he was too strong, her body betraying her as it came alive under his. Shane’s hips pressed into her as he shifted to pin her more securely and hers rolled back in answer. Her dark hair had tumbled from its high bun and clung to her neck and forehead, slick from the exertion of spending all morning being thrown around by Shane and constantly corrected by her sister.

Somewhere between her first hit and the second, Mia had gotten up and shuffled out the room to leave them be for a while. She wasn’t in the mood to join in and enjoy it, with her cramps being what they were, and something told her the moments to come would be best left undivided. Sophie didn’t even notice, too caught up in their tension-filled bubble to focus on anything except the feel of Shane’s skin and the weight of his body on top of hers.

“What’s got you so distracted, huh?” Shane growled into her ear.

Sophie gritted her teeth and exhaled an irritated breath through her nose. He knew exactly why she was so distracted – he’d been deliberately winding her up, but she’d have bet a pretty penny it hadn’t resulted in the outcome he’d wanted. He’d been trying to get her to snap and lash out, not make her lose focus completely.

“C’mon, girl, what’cha waitin’ for? Break free.”

She bucked her hips up and tried to roll over, but Shane held her fast, not letting her budge more than an inch. She grunted and managed to tug one of her wrists free, then hissed in a breath when he quickly grabbed her hand and pinned that instead. She let her forehead drop to the floor in surrender, knowing Shane wouldn’t be happy but not able to bring herself to care.

“Hey, don’t just give up like that, what’s wr-”

Sophie’s voice escaped her, soft and desperate. “ _Shane…”_

He froze above her, then laughed darkly. She let him adjust their position until she was on her back beneath him and he was holding himself over her with her hands still pinned by his. She refused to meet his eye, but couldn’t stop a moan escaping her as he settled between her legs, all power and hard muscle pressing up against her.

“Well, look at you, all riled up,” he murmured. “Get’cha all hot and bothered, did I?”

“Fuck off,” she snapped, but her heart wasn’t in it. Shane lowered himself down until he could force her to meet his gaze, then grinned at the sight of her lust-blown pupils and flushed skin.

“Oh, _Darlin’,”_ he almost crooned. “You shoulda said.”

Sophie felt her cheeks threaten to blush, suddenly self-conscious and feeling silly for letting herself get into such a state, but then she let out a quiet whine of relief as he switched his grip to hold both her wrists in one hand before reaching down to roughly shove her yoga shorts down her legs. She kicked herself free, then grumbled when he pinned her legs with his instead of letting her wrap them around his hips. She needed more. More. _More_.

“You been worked up this whole time?”

Sophie nodded, then groaned when his lips crashed down onto hers, all rough and tongue and nips of teeth that had her back arching desperately. His hand slipped between her legs to tease, but then it was his turn to groan as his fingers met her soaking folds.

“ _Sweetheart…_ ” Shane pressed his forehead to hers, eyes wide with amazement as she bucked her hips up at just the barest brush of his fingertips over her clit. “You’re sensitive today, ain’t ya?”

“Please…” Sophie begged. She couldn’t take the teasing - her whole body was like a lightning rod that sent every sensation running straight to her core.

Shane’s hand snapped up to grab her neck, pinning her head to the floor as he squeezed tightly, right to her limit. Sophie’s hips jerked upwards and her eyes rolled back, only for him to bring her back to attention with a sharp, “Look at me.”

Sophie forced her eyes to open again and gazed up at him, letting him read whatever he needed to on her face.

“ _Fuck,”_ he breathed, eyes dark and breathing a little heavier than before. “Darlin’, what’s gotten into _you?”_

Sophie inhaled a desperate breath, then exhaled it as a sigh. “Shane…”

He kissed her hotly, cock throbbing at the sight of her like that, hair all spread out like some kind of halo and his name on her lips like a prayer. Left hand still on her neck, he released her wrists and trailed his other hand down her side until it was slipping between her legs, his fingers sliding inside her easily with how fucking wet she was.

“Jesus,” he hissed at the scorching heat. “No wonder you ain’t been focused.”

Sophie whimpered and reached down to slide her fingers through his hair to steady herself, only for his hand to snap back up and pin her wrists above her head again, wet fingers leaving a damp line across her skin as they moved.

“Nuh-uh-uh,” he chided. “Did I say you could move?”

Sophie shook her head best she could with his hand round her neck, then whined when he refused to lower his hand again. Shane kissed her slowly as his thumb brushed over her pulse point on her neck, silently checking her body’s reaction. Lust, not fear.

“You want me to touch you?” he murmured against her lips. “That what you need?”

“Please,” she begged. “Please, Shane…”

“You gonna keep your hands where I put them, right?” He trailed open-mouthed kisses along her jaw and down to the side of her neck not covered by his hand. “And you’re gonna do exactly what I say?”

“Y-Yes,” she croaked. His touch felt so good, but it wasn’t enough. She needed more, and she needed it now.

“And you’re gonna get exactly what you want if behave for me, ain’t ya, Darlin’?”

“I’ll be good, I’ll be good,” she whispered, tone pleading. “I promise.”

“I know you will,” he breathed as he finally released her hands and ran his fingers along her arm, over her sensitive breast and down her stomach. “Always my sweet girl.”

Sophie whimpered, but kept still even when his fingers slipped inside her again. She wanted to switch her brain off and just _feel_ , but something was buzzing within her and she had no idea how to shut it off. Shane would. He always did.

“Spread your legs for me, Darlin’,” he murmured, then rewarded her with a kiss when she did so without hesitation. “There’s a good girl.”

He pressed his palm flat over her clit as the extra space let him crook his fingers over her g-spot, testing how sensitive she truly was. Her reaction was instantaneous. Her back shot up off the floor and she moaned loudly, barely able to keep her wrists where he’d put them. He did it again and she cried out in pleasure as her thighs tensed and relaxed against him. _Interesting…_

“I’m gonna try som’thin’,” he told her softly. “Just relax for me, okay?”

Sophie nodded best she could, then felt her eyes widen as he slid his ring finger alongside his middle one and repeated the motion, this time with his palm rubbing over her clit as well. He moved slow at first to let her get used to the sensation, but soon she was gasping and he could tell she was struggling to hold still. Tension spread through her whole body, it was that hard for her.

“Relax,” he soothed, stroking over her pulse point with his thumb as he pressed their foreheads together.

“Shane,” she gritted out. Her hips twitched, shifting the angle slightly but not quite enough. She wanted to come, and she wanted it now.

Shane almost gave in, almost let her move how she wanted, but he knew her body better than he did his own. Knew she needed that extra push.

“Keep still,” he reminded her quietly.

Sophie closed her eyes and tried to focus, but the noise in her head was too loud and she was starting to doubt he’d be able to shut it off.

“I need-” She let out a loud groan as her head dropped back against the floor. “ _Please.”_

Shane released her neck and grabbed hold of one of her hands, threading their fingers together to give her the support she needed as his other hand sped up, the soft, slick sound of its movements filling the room. _Fuck, she was so wet._

“Oh!” Sophie gasped. “ _Oh!_ ”

“It’s comin’,” he promised. He kissed her deeply, tongue tangling with hers as her fingers flexed against his. She moaned into his mouth and he felt her tighten around him as her body trembled. He kissed his way down to her neck and sucked a dark mark below her jawline, a secret sensitive spot he’d discovered by accident the night before.

She keened, body jerking as she forced herself not to move, and he knew she’d had enough, knew she couldn’t take much more.

“You can move,” he whispered, and just like that her free hand clamped hold of his shoulder and her feet planted themselves flat on the floor so her bent knees could bracket him in. “Keep yer hips still as y’can. I’ll getcha there - I promise, Darlin’.”

Sophie whimpered but did as he’d asked, trying to keep her hips relaxed as possible while the rest of her seemed to undulate beneath him. Her nails scratched at his shoulder but didn’t dig in, and her head tipped back to offer more of her neck to his lips as the fog finally, _finally_ started to clear, leaving nothing in its wake but pure pleasure that had her moaning and gasping.

“ _Fuck… Fuck…_ ” She felt that wave start to build, but her body wanted to do something else as well and she tried to buck her hips to get Shane to stop. “ _Shane!_ ”

“S’alright,” he breathed. “Relax.”

“N-No,” she panted. “Shane, I’m…”

He lifted his head and squeezed her fingers tightly to draw her eyes back down to him instead of the ceiling. Her protest was born out of embarrassment, not reluctance – she’d have brought that color system out of retirement if she truly wanted him to stop. “S’okay, Darlin’, just let it happen.”

She opened her mouth to protest again but he kissed her slowly, calmly, then sped up his hand even more, relentlessly hitting her g-spot while his palm massaged her clit in rapid strokes. She inhaled in tiny gasps as her eyes widened, walls starting to flutter as it built and built inside her. He smiled and kept his gaze focused on hers, feeling a surge of pride.

“There you go, baby,” Shane murmured. “There you go. C’mon, let it happen… just let it happen…”

Her lips parted in a silent “O” and then she felt herself gush as her climax ripped through her, sending ripples of electric pleasure from head to toe and back again. He kept his movements steady, coaxing her through it, and she couldn’t think, couldn’t move…

“ _Breathe_ , Darlin’. You gotta breathe.”

She inhaled in a shuddering gasp that turned into a loud moan as Shane nuzzled his cheek against hers before carefully withdrawing his now soaked fingers and starting to circle her clit with light strokes. It was almost too much, but he was gentle enough that all it did was reignite the flames that had burned her from the inside out.

“Shane,” she panted, “what’re you…”

“Gonna do it again,” he told her. “You just gotta let go.”

“I don’t…” She tried to shake her head but his kiss stopped her. “I don’t…”

His fingers sank into her again and his other hand wrapped itself around her neck to squeeze tightly, bringing her right back into that blissful empty headspace she’d almost pushed herself out of. Sophie groaned from low in her chest, body quick to respond even if her mind was too slow to keep up, letting him inside and holding him there as he started that pulsing again.

It was moments like this that turned Shane on more than anything, when he could feel her body give itself over to him before she even realized it was happening. Before, he’d have hesitated, asked her color, but he didn’t need that anymore to know what stage she was at. Her body screamed it loud and clear, and he trusted her lips would too if she was anything but willing.

“See?” he whispered. “I gotcha. I gotcha, Darlin’.”

And he did. She knew he did. But she needed more, somehow, so she pulled her hand free from his and reached between them as his fingers slowed.

“Need you,” she panted. “Need-”

Her movements faltered as her thighs shook violently, but she managed to undo his pants and push at his waistband just enough for him to get the message.

“Want you to come for me again, first,” Shane urged. “I know you can.”

Sophie whined, but she could tell he was right. She could feel it building again, now she knew what to expect. Her body was begging for it, but her mind? Her mind was overwhelmed, emotion pricking at her eyes as her breaths caught in her chest.

Sensing the shift, Shane let go of her throat and pushed her hair back from her face, suddenly tender in a complete contrast to his urgent movements below her waist. He gazed down at her, and the adoration in his eyes made her clutch at his shoulders for something to ground her with.

“Come on, baby…”

Three more quick movements and she was crying out sharply, back bowing almost painfully as she felt herself gush over his hand again. Shane let out a sound of triumph, but then his fingers were gone and the thick, blunt head of his cock was at her entrance and Sophie. Could. Not…

“Breathe,” Shane reminded her for the second time, then waited for her to take in a shuddering breath before pushing into that wet heat and groaning as it tightened and pulsed around him. “Fuck, Darlin’…”

She wrapped her arms and legs around him, holding him close as possible and praying he wouldn’t see the tears that had escaped her eyes. She was overwhelmed, so full of an emotion she couldn’t comprehend, but he could tell anyway. Of course he could. He kissed her cheek, keeping hips as still as he could, and lowered himself so they were almost completely flush together and he was bracing himself with his forearms by her head.

“I gotcha,” he promised, forehead pressed against hers as he started to move in slow, smooth strokes. “I gotcha.”

Sophie nodded and let her lips find his. “I know.”

It felt so good, being inside her when she was so soft and tight and wet and… but the floor was unforgiving, pushing back harshly against his knees and her spine, and after a few minutes Shane couldn’t take it anymore.

“Hold on tight,” he murmured, then pulled her up against his chest as he sat back on his knees and somehow managed to get to his feet just long enough to move them to the bed they’d pushed against the wall to make room for their training.

The moment her back hit the soft mattress, Sophie moaned in relief and reached between them to guide him home again, not wanting them to be apart for a second longer than necessary. Shane laughed under his breath, a quiet, almost reverent sound as he pushed back inside her and covered her body with his the way he knew she needed him to.

“M’here,” he murmured between kisses. “M’right here.”

“Always,” Sophie breathed. “You promised.”

“I did,” he whispered as she pushed against the mattress with her feet to meet his thrusts. “Never gonna break that.”

Sophie whimpered and kissed him hungrily, hands suddenly clinging to any part of him they could reach as that emotion swelled up again. One settled on his waist, the other in his hair as his rhythm picked up and his pubic bone teased her clit with each movement. It wouldn’t take much for her to fall a final time, but she wanted him to fall with her, wanted to feel his release as she squeezed around him.

“Roll over?” she mumbled. It was one of his favorite ways to take her recently, laying her on her front with her hips canted up so he could thrust into her from behind, body stretched out over hers.

But Shane shook his head and softened their kisses, sweeping her hair back from her face before pushing himself up and gazing down at her. She may not have been thinking it, but Shane knew rolling her over would probably have the opposite effect to what he wanted – it might stir up the wrong memories, the mental state she was in right now.

“Want you just like this,” he told her quietly and truthfully. “Got all I need.”

Sophie’s hand moved from his hair to cup his cheek, her thumb stroking over his skin as his hips rocked them both steadily to the edge again. They didn’t say anything, barely made any sounds, making everything ten times more intense until finally she was pulsating around him again and he was spilling into her with a quiet groan, lips falling to hers in a tender kiss.

Sophie wrapped both her arms tightly around him and hugged him close as everything hit her again, making her mind feel hazy in a good way this time instead of buzzing anxiously. No tears escaped, but they wanted to. Words couldn’t describe how she felt, but she didn’t need them, not when Shane was planting gentle kisses across her neck and murmuring soothingly to her instead.

They stayed there until she calmed and he’d softened inside of her, and Sophie made her sleepy limbs loosen their death grip on him so he could push himself up on his forearms to gaze down at her.

“You okay?”

“Yeah,” she whispered. “Thank you.”

Shane shook his head and kissed her softly. “Thank _you.”_

“Think Mia’s gonna be pissed we took so long?” Sophie wondered, suddenly realizing her sister hadn’t been in the room for a while. Her mind had been too… pre-occupied to process her absence before.

“Nah,” Shane mumbled. “She knows she’ll get all the attention she deserves once she’s the one not on her period.” Sophie stiffened, but he continued on, unaware. “S’easier, now the two of you clearly don’t match exactly on everythin’.”

Sophie found her mouth forming words even as her mind spiralled. “Yeah, after last month it must be a relief.”

“Just glad you ain’t arguin’ this time,” Shane replied. “Hate seein’ you two at odds.”

She smiled, and he must have misinterpreted the forced side of it as self-deprecation instead of barely contained shock, for he kissed her gently before carefully extracting himself from her and heading over to grab a clean set of clothes for them both. Sophie pushed herself to a seated position on weak arms and swung her clumsy legs over the side of the bed before reaching out and taking the clothes Shane offered her.

“Hey,” he sighed as he crouched down in front of her, fully clothed now. “Ain’t no shame in gettin’ a bit irritable when you got all that shit floodin’ ya. When you start gettin’ cranky, least I’ll know this time, right?”

“Right,” Sophie agreed. Shane smiled, then kissed her forehead before standing and stretching his back, sore from their training and the effort of holding his weight above her.

“I’m gonna go check on your sister, make sure she’s alright,” he told her softly. “You can rest up if you want – I worked you hard today.”

Sophie found herself nodding. “Yeah, I might take a nap if that’s alright?”

“Course it is,” he replied. He bent down and gave her a quick kiss. “I’ll come wake ya before lunch.”

“Thanks,” she mumbled. She watched him go, then flopped back on the bed with a twist in her gut and acid in her chest.

Mia was on the last day of her period.

Sophie hadn’t even started hers.

Shane headed down the hallway to the main room, blissfully unaware of Sophie’s inner turmoil. He found Mia curled up on the couch with a hot water bottle and smiled sadly as he moved to sit beside her and let her lay her head in his lap. He stroked his fingers through her hair, and she hummed with relief.

“Sounds like you two had fun,” she sighed.

“Don’t worry, Babygirl,” he murmured. “You’ll get yours, too.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Mia teased, sounding a little more like her usual self now the worst of the cramps were over. “Hope you didn’t work her too hard, though – I’m gonna need her help trimming my hair later.”

“It’s getting long again,” Shane agreed. “I’d offer to do it, but…”

“Don’t want a buzzcut like you had, thanks,” Mia replied lightly. “Don’t think I’d carry it off so well.”

"Nah, you're beautiful no matter how you wear it baby." Shane cupped her cheek gently and rubbed his thumb over her cheek. 

"Sweet talking me ain't gonna get you anywhere, Shane." She grinned up at him, then grimaced slightly as a small cramp hit her, reminding them both why. His free hand reached further round to rub at her lower back.

"Ah, no brownie points for sweet talk?" He mocked a pout, but it just looked comical on his usually stern, manly face.

"Not for sweet talk… but sweet kisses? Now there's where you get some points.”

"Well, if you insist that's the only way..." He grinned and suddenly curled over her to capture her lips in another heavy kiss that had her breathless and whimpering in seconds flat. Her hands reached up to grip at his hair and collar of his shirt, but he pulled back.

"How many that get me?" His breathing was even and there was a smile in his voice as Mia caught her breath and tapped at her chin as if she was really thinking about it, when she was really just buying herself time to recover.

"Two."

"Two!?" He growled playfully and pulled her up against his chest, making her straddle his lap on the couch. His left hand reached up to grip her chestnut locks and yank her head back, gently, so he could pepper kisses over her neck. 

"Okay, okay.... Three and a half." She was trembling and he knew she was close to her limit. They couldn't go very far while she was in this state - sex was just far too painful for her and Shane respected that.

He smirked and loosened his grip on her hair to pull her up further against his chest and hold her to him, wrapping his thick arms around her tightly as he kissed her cheek. Mia hummed softly and curled into him, content.

They stayed there for several minutes in comfortable silence until Mia grumbled her discomfort and rolled from his lap to her place at his side again, bringing the hot water bottle back over her lower abdomen.

“Fuckin’ hate this,” she muttered.

Shane grimaced sympathetically and ran his fingers through her hair. “I know.”

“Least I don’t turn all psycho bitch, though – think I’d prefer the pain to tha-” Mia shut her mouth at the sound of the bedroom door opening and turned to see Sophie slowly emerge from the hallway.

“Thought y’were takin’ a nap, Darlin’?” Shane called softly.

Sophie shrugged uncomfortably. “Not that tired now.”

Mia frowned at the look on her sister’s face. Her eyes were almost shell-shocked, and her cheeks were void of their usual flush, but she was quick to hide it with a smile that didn’t quite reach the rest of her face.

“Sweetheart, you look…” Shane shifted, like he wanted to go over to her. “Did I…”

“No, no,” Sophie mumbled with a shake of her head. “I think maybe I’m…” She trailed off and looked down at the floor, then let out a long sigh. “I might be…”

Mia sat more upright, brow furrowing as Sophie chewed on her bottom lip nervously. “Soph?”

Her sister’s face crumpled and Shane was on his feet in seconds, almost running to her side and enveloping her in his arms. Sophie clung to him tightly for a moment, then pushed herself back and held onto his biceps instead as she tried to steady herself.

“I think I’m…” Sophie glanced over to Mia, and the blue-eyed twin caught something there that she couldn’t quite place because her sister was already looking back at Shane. “I think I am tired after all.”

“Okay, let’s getcha back to-”

“No,” Sophie cut across quickly, almost panicked. “No, I… Can I just stay on the sofa with you two? I don’t wanna… I don’t…”

Mia patted the cushion beside her in silent invitation and Sophie accepted immediately, curling up against her and carefully lowering her head into her sister’s lap. Shane hesitated where he stood, but as soon as Mia shot him a pointed look, he quickly made his way back to the sofa and sat on the other side of Sophie, who lifted her legs into his lap and reached for one of his hands.

Mia glanced down at her sister with concern, then tentatively reached out and stroked her fingers through her long, dark brown hair and watched Sophie’s face relax in response. It wasn’t the most comfortable position, but it was rare for Sophie to be so… off, so Mia didn’t mind. She quickly fell asleep, but they both waited for her breathing to completely even out before speaking again.

“What was _that?_ ” Mia whispered.

Shane looked at her with a dumbstruck expression, just as clueless as she was. “I have no idea. She was fine, and then…”

Mia frowned and pressed the backs of her fingers to Sophie’s forehead. “She doesn’t feel hot or clammy, but maybe she’s sick?”

“We’ll keep an eye on her,” Shane murmured, stroking his hand along Sophie’s leg. “Hopefully it’s just a one off.”

“Yeah, hopefully,” Mia sighed, but something told her it wasn’t.

That something looked to be wrong, however. Over the next few days, Sophie was quieter than normal but didn’t have any other outbursts of emotion or seem to be any more ill than she had that first night. If anything, she became more focused, working harder in the garden and making sure she didn’t get distracted during training anymore, defending herself from Shane’s offensive maneuvers with a determination none of them had expected.

She even cut Mia’s hair for her, and when Mia emerged from the bathroom to show Shane her new, shorter haircut, the look on his face told her Sophie had done a good job. His eyes lit up and his lips quirked into a small smile, making Mia smirk back at him. She knew that look when she saw it.

Mia turned to kiss Sophie’s cheek. “Thank you.”

The younger twin glanced at Shane and laughed before ruffling Mia hair and smiling. “You kids have fun – I’m gonna go… nap or something.”

She hugged her sister tightly, then saluted Shane before retreating to the bedroom and closing the door behind her. Mia stared after her for a moment, part of her wondering why she’d been napping so much lately, but then Shane was crossing the main room towards her and all thoughts unrelated to him flew out her mind.

“So, you like it then?” she teased.

"Love it." He reached over and ran his fingers through the soft locks. Without all the added weight from the length of it, the locks were bouncier and curly. It set her apart from her twin a little bit more besides the color shades.

He smirked as she leaned into the touch, a look in her eyes that clearly spoke volumes of how much she wanted his hands on her. His eyes roamed over her body, not attempting to hide his once over a single bit as he did so. 

She was wearing those too short jean shorts again. The ones where, when she bent over, the crease of her ass cheeks peeked from under the frayed edges. The ones she’d had to sew back together after he’d ripped them off her. That in itself made him want to bite into the flesh there, but paired with nothing else but a bikini top they had found on a run… Her breasts pulled at the strings tightly and he could see her nipples poking into the material. 

He bit his lip and groaned before lashing out at her, taking her mouth with his roughly and backing her into the counter beside the sink in the kitchen. He smiled against her lips as she groaned in response and reached up to tug on the longer curled locks on his head.

"You wearing this for me baby?" He tugged gently on the string coming from the dark bikini fabric, teasing but not undoing it.

"No idea what you mean." She looked up slyly at him and he knew she was in a playful mood by the way her neck arched just right to show the expanse of the tanned smooth flesh to tease him right back.

"Well, you wouldn't be wearing it for anyone else… Would ya?" His hands slid over her sides, up and down, back around to her lower back and up to between her shoulder blades. His fingers skimmed over the raised parts of her flesh tenderly.

"You know there's no one else, Shane.” She leaned forward and peppered kisses over his stubbled jaw, teeth nipping just barely at his jawline, and he growled soft in his throat as she did so. 

"Damn right." He pressed her harder into the countertop, loving the way she gasped and tried to lift her knee up to hitch onto his hip. But she was so much shorter than him, she couldn't hop up onto the counter with the way he was pushing against her. 

"You my girl, Mia?"

She nodded as he reached up, grabbed a fist full of her chestnut locks and held tight as he made her bare her throat to him. 

"Yes." It came out as a moan, a breathless needy thing that made his blood boil and his need for her skyrocket. She was always like that, bending to his will so easily.

"Mnnn, say it again, baby." His teeth nipped and bit at the cord of her throat, knowing it was a sensitive spot that would make her arch her back.

"I'm your girl, Shane," she sighed out, her back arching up and into him as his mouthed sucked and bit a bruising hickey onto her neck. There was no need to ask for color - he'd long discovered she loved it when he was rough with her like that.

Suddenly, she was being lifted up and onto the counter. Her legs wrapped around his hips and he caged her in with his arms, pressing her back into the wall behind her, shoulder hitting the edge of the window frame.

He leaned over her that way he always did, a bit more primal than when he was with Sophie. A bit tougher, a bit harder, and more inner animal showing itself when he was with Mia. He caved her in with muscles and strength and a sense of darkness he no longer held back when with her.

There was no need to ask it again - the answer was always the same to his next question. She was _his_. His, and his alone, and there was nothing or no one that could change that. But he asked it anyway, because he wanted to hear it. Out loud. From her lips. 

"Who owns you, Babygirl? Huh?"

She squirmed under his caging arms and tried her best to create some kind of friction against her core from his jeans. He smirked at her restlessness. 

"Come on. Tell me, girl." He pulled his hips back a bit, making her growl in that frustrated way she did whenever she didn't get what she wanted.

"You do, Shane." She was still squirming and he liked the way she pouted when he took her hands and pinned them by her hips. 

"Say it again. Say it right." He’d asked a hundred times if it was okay, if the way he took her was too much or too similar to what had happened to her. But she'd said it time and time again. _You're the only one I want to say those things to me._ And yet he never tired of hearing it.

"You own me, Shane."

He groaned and moved back between her legs, letting go of her hands to yank her hips forward and slam them against his own with his strength, giving her that pressure she was craving. 

"Fuck." He could feel how warm and wet she was through two layers of jeans and underwear, and he wanted her right then, but he always drew it out with Mia. Loved how she ended up nearly begging after being edged for so long. 

He rocked his hips against hers, rutting up into her clothed core as she clung to his shoulders and neck, her fingers curling into the hair at the back of his neck, soft panting breaths sending chills down his spine as she rutted back against him.

She moaned louder and louder and she was getting close. Shane knew it, too. And that was when he pulled back his hips, pinned her hands to her sides and made her sit still as she rolled backwards from that crest. Denied her that pleasure. 

"Shane!" She whimpered at him, opening her eyes as he pressed his forehead to hers. 

"Mhmm… What's wrong, baby?" He teased and she groaned, growing angered as he continued to deny her. 

"Bastard...." she growled and he stilled, leaning back to look her square in the face. Found no fear or anxiety, just want and lust and hunger in her darkened gaze. 

" _Bastard_ , huh?" He nodded a bit, sucking on the inside of his cheek for a second before he moved, yanking her off the counter and turning her around to bend over it instead. His hips pinned hers, breath heavy in her ear. 

His hand came down with little warning and she shrieked in shock. She twisted her head to look over her shoulder with wide eyes at Shane. He'd just... _spanked_ her. He'd fucking spanked her. 

"Ah, ah, ah…" Quick as a flash, he had both her hands pinned behind her in his fist, putting pressing on her lower back to make her lay still as she growled under him. And, oh, she was _seething_ \- he could see the murder in her eyes - but underneath? He could see pure lust. 

"You know… I expected better of you, baby," he spoke, slow and gently, like he was chastising a child who needed to learn a lesson.  

His free hand unbuckled his belt from his jeans, hips keeping her pinned nice and snug against the counter so she couldn't move away from him. The leather made a slick sound as he ripped his belt from the loops of his jeans. 

Mia stilled a bit and looked back over her shoulder again, blue eyes dark and ice cold as she realized what he was about to do. He lifted her wrists and wound his belt around them a few times, tight enough to be snug but not enough to cause injury, and buckled it. 

"Now, be a good girl and take it,” was all he said before raising his hand again and slapping her over her shorts, catching her unawares again and making her cry out from the shock and surprising pleasure of it.

"Shane!" she gasped his name out, wriggling her shoulders and trying to lean up, but his hand was on the back of her neck, squeezing just enough to make her stay still.

"Mia," he chastised and she stopped, a pleasure-filled sob escaping her throat as he slapped her backside again, using his hand to then sooth the stinging skin. "Be a good girl and be quiet. Don't wake your sister, now." 

His hand slid up her back, fingers light as he made quick work of untying the string holding her bikini top onto her slim body. He tugged it out from under her and reached forward for her mouth. 

"Open, now." He felt her whole body shudder at his tone and she relented after only a moment, opening her lips so he could stuff the fabric into her mouth as much as will fit without choking her… Well, not too much, anyway. 

His hands roamed over her sides, fingertips teasing over the sides of her breasts that were squished underneath her chest. "You gonna be a good girl for me?"

His teeth nipped and nibbled at her earlobe as his weight pressed down on her back. 

"Mhmm,” came her muffled reply, but she nodded a bit in answer. 

"That's my girl." He pulled her hips back, just enough so he could shove his hand between her and the edge of the counter to unbutton her shorts. He had half a mind to just rip them in half again, but he liked them on her too much to ruin them for a second time – she’d barely managed to patch them up from the first one.

Once they were loose enough, he gently petted her over her panties, the cotton heated and damp clear above her clit. She was soaking wet and it made him rut against her backside, unable to stop his instinctual reaction to knowing she was like that for him, _because_ _of_ him.

He didn't touch her where she wanted him to. Just barely roamed over her mound, not even penetrating her panties yet but still making her buck and whimper under him.

"Not yet baby, not yet." 

He liked her like this, yielding and willing beneath him. Literally letting him do whatever he wanted so she could get the pleasure she craved. But as much as he liked her gagged like that, he wanted to hear her scream. Not wanting to wake up her twin, he gently took the bikini top from her mouth and stood her up. "Come on, Babygirl." 

She was unsteady on her legs but he held her up by her bicep, leading her out the open door and into the yard. Plus side of the end of the world? No nosy neighbors. He pushed her toward the Jeep, opened the door, and helped her up into the backseat. 

With a push, she was on her back, arms still tied together with his belt. Her chestnut-colored hair fanned out and over the side of the seat as she stared up at him. She'd been on the edge for so long now, she was ready for anything, but they both knew he’d draw it out just a bit more. 

"Just look at you, sweetheart…" His hand roamed up her thigh, thumb running over the seam of her shorts. She tossed her head back and moaned at the slight touch as he smirked and climbed into the jeep with her. 

"You want to come?"

She nodded, sitting up to kiss him as he tugged her shorts down her legs. 

"Please, Shane. _Please_."

He chuckled darkly against her lips, loving the sound of her voice like that. All weak and needy and wanting - the total opposite from her normal icy tone.

"I gotcha, baby." He worked quickly, undoing his jeans and pushing them down to release himself from the hot confines. The Jeep was sweltering in the afternoon sun, and they weren’t helping with the way they were panting.

She still had her panties on but the moment he pulled her into his lap she was rocking her hips over and against him, making him grunt and grab her hips to press her down as she rutted on top of him. He no longer cared, needed to sink inside her more than he needed to breathe, so gripped the fabric and pulled, ripping the elastic and cotton as she gasped in shock. 

Her wet core was right against him and he groaned long and deep, threading his fingers into her hair as he kissed her roughly. Their teeth bit and clashed as he gripped her hip in his other hand, lifting her up then pulling her down suddenly the moment his tip hit her entrance. 

And it was so fucking good. So tight. He could _feel_ her stretch and contract around him like a vice, reveled in the fact he bottomed out inside of her, how badly she wanted that last half inch inside of her. She was squirming and backing up on top of him as he kissed her breathless.

"I gotcha. I gotcha, Babygirl."

He gripped her hips roughly, not thinking about his strength as he lifted her up and slammed her back down for every stroke, grunting into her chest, teeth biting at her nipples as she bounced on top of him. 

She barely missed smacking her head on the roof and he pulled her forward some to so she could lay her head on his shoulder. Her body fluttered around him and the way she was proclaiming to God made him grin against her skin as he took her harder and harder, the Jeep rocking like it was filled with teenagers.

"Come on, baby… that's my good girl,” he groaned out, and the second she cried out in pleasure he was gone too, teeth sinking harshly into her left shoulder. His strong hands gripping her hips with bruising force as they both came down from their highs. 

The coppery taste of blood snapped Shane back from his lust filled haze. His lips and mouth instantly pulled from her skin and his eyes went wide. There was a deep set of teeth marks on her soft flesh and Shane froze, cock going soft faster than ever before at the sight of them.

"Fuck!” He reached up to hold her bicep and neck gently as he looked over the obvious wound. He'd never wanted to hurt her, but he'd drawn blood. Drawn fucking _blood_. "Are you okay?!"

"Hmmm?" She looked up, lifting her head from the fog in her brain and he saw her wince as a little pained whimper escaped her throat. "Fuck, that hurts."

"Oh, God…" He unbuckled the belt around her wrists and hugged her to his chest, kissing gently over her neck as he apologized over and over. "God, I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry, baby. Please, I didn't mean to..."

"Shane? Shane, it's okay." With her hands now free, she was able to wrap her arms around his chest as best she could in the cramped space. Her shoulder was sore but she wasn’t worried about it. Shane just lost himself in the pleasure. 

"I'm so sorry," he kept mumbling. Over and over. On repeat.

Mia leaned back to cup his face in her hands.  “Shane, it's okay. I promise."

He searched her eyes for a moment before sighing heavily and nodding, clutching her to his chest. 

They sat there for long moments until Shane sighed again and carefully helped her out the Jeep, ending up having to carry her back inside because of how weak her legs became when she tried to stand. 

"My hero." She smiled and snuggled into him as he carried her. He enjoyed her rare clinginess and she loved how close he was holding her, like she was something precious but not fragile or weak. Just something that deserved to be taken care of.

He set her naked form on the couch, then tucked her chin up so he could see the damage he did more clearly. As soon as he touched the area around it, she hissed a little bit, caching the guilt that flashed in his eyes at the sound. Her small hands gripped his tightly and squeezed.

"Shane, I promise it's okay. It's tender, but you did it... you did it climaxing. You let yourself go with me, and I want that." She kissed his pulse point. "That darkness? Let it out with me. I know Sophie can't take it as hard as you need to give sometimes, so when you hit that point, I'll be here. I can take it. I like it." 

She kissed him soft and slow, showing him that it was alright, that she could handle whatever he had to give and dish it back to him. 

"No matter what, Shane, I'll be here,” she promised. “Right here."

"But I hurt you..." His thumb swiped at the clotting blood trickling down her bare skin. 

"Shane, when are you gonna realize that I - that _we_ \- want to be with you. No matter what that entails. Even if it hurts. Shane, I'm just happy to be with you."

Shane kissed over her cheeks and lips.

"God, I…" _I love you._ He choked and held her close to him instead.

"I know." She carded her fingers through his hair and smiled sweetly and kindly at him. 

She brought her hand down to cup his cheek and gave him a lingering kiss before carefully getting up from the sofa and rolling her neck to stretch out. “I’m gonna go get dressed – you still wanting to go back to that mall from before?”

Shane nodded. “Yeah, wanna make sure we got enough clothes for winter. Don’t wan’cha catchin’ a cold or anythin’. Better to grab it now than miss it later.”

“Should be plenty of daylight left,” Mia agreed. “Gimme five, and I’ll check if Soph wants to come too.”

“She will,” Shane knew.

“Yeah, course she will,” Mia laughed, then grinned at him before heading down the hall to the main bedroom. “Soph? You awake?”

She pushed open the door and froze at the sight of Sophie sitting on the edge of the bed with her head between her legs, breathing deeply. She rushed to her sister’s side and ran a hand up and down her back, trying not to panic. “Soph, talk to me.”

“I’m fine,” Sophie muttered, then pushed herself upright and swallowed thickly. Her face was pale and she looked about ready to keel over.

Mia sighed. “I’m gonna get Sh-”

“No!” Sophie snapped, grabbing her sister’s wrist tightly before grimacing and loosening her hold. “No, thank you. I’m alright.”

“You don’t look alright, Soph,” Mia pointed out.

“Well, I’m telling you I am,” Sophie retorted. “So just leave it. Please.”

Mia huffed in frustration, then shook her head as she stood up and headed over to the chest of drawers to grab some clothes. If Sophie wanted to be stubborn, she could go right on ahead. Mia quickly found an outfit and pulled it on, keeping her back to Sophie but still listening for any signs of discomfort – the moment she heard any, she’d be on it.

The bed creaked as Sophie carefully got to her feet, and Mia heard her groan quickly at the change in position before trying to smother the sound with a cough. Sophie headed over to the wall and grabbed a pair of boots, wavering slightly as she bent over to pull the first one on but quickly recovering.

“We headed to that strip mall?” she asked quietly as she struggled with the second boot.

“Shane and I are,” Mia replied. “You’re sure as Hell not.”

“Mia…” Sophie protested.

The older twin turned and crossed her arms over her chest, eyeing her sister disapprovingly. “You gonna tell me what’s up with you?”

“Nothing’s-”

Mia rolled her eyes. “Then like I said – you’re not coming.”

“Mia!” Sophie stepped forward and grabbed her sister’s, shooting a nervous glance to the door before sighing softly. “We’ll talk about it later. Okay?”

That made Mia pause.

“Hey…” She reached up to cup her sister’s cheek and frowned when those green eyes filled with tears. “Soph?”

“I’m fine,” she whispered, shaking it off. “Just please… leave it?”

Mia considered it for a moment, then nodded in acquiescence. “Okay. But you’re telling me as soon as you get a chance, you hear me?”

“Yeah,” Sophie agreed, then smiled weakly before shrugging off Mia’s touch and grabbing her knife and pistol from the top of the dresser to tuck them into her waistband. “I’ll meet you in the Jeep.”

The ride was quiet save for the air thundering through the rolled down windows, blowing the girls hair awry but cooling their heated skin. Late summer was always hot and humid, and they'd been in that freezer so long they couldn't remember a time when they weren't sweating from the heat.

The mall was an hour or so drive away from the cabin, so they had plenty of daylight left for a quick scan to then head back before dark. Headlights drew in walkers so they never drove at night. Not ever. Even if it meant leaving earlier and trying again the next day. Or week, in this case.

Once the Jeep was parked outside the main doors, the girls readied themselves for walkers like normal. Shane usually let them be, keeping a watchful eye out for people as well as walkers, but something had changed since their last trip there. His eyes narrowed at an older style car parked askew a few hundred feet away.

He whistled softly, catching their attention, and motioned for them to stay low and head inside. Weeks of teaching them officer and military ops body language paid off as they did as bid without hesitation. Shane stooped low, rushing over to shadow them through the broken front doors, over the busted glass, and toward the service desk a few yards in. He made sure they were hidden behind it, then took up post behind a thick pillar.

The only sound they made came from the click of the slide of his Glock being pulled back, then two more clicks resonated through softly as Mia and Sophie flicked off the safeties from their pistols in response.

For long endless moments there was nothing. Just the caws of crows, the breeze blowing… then came the unmissable sound of a herd of walkers coming through the streets. 

Shane's eyes widened, but it was too late for him to move to get to the girls. Walkers were already starting to move around the Jeep, almost swarming it as they ambled along, and he knew even the slightest sound would draw them in towards them. He glanced around the pillar to see Sophie clutching onto Mia like a lifeline, realizing the sheer number of walkers as quickly as he had. A few, a _dozen_ , they could take down. But not this many. It would be suicide to even try.

There was nothing he could do except watch as more and more walkers crowded outside the entrance but kept moving on, oblivious to the meal inside. He motioned for the twins to stay quiet, an urgent finger against his lips, and he got two nods in return as the both of them remained completely silent behind the service desk. Mia gripped Sophie’s hand, and Shane had to clench his into fists to keep from running over to shield them both. It was torturous, being frozen so far away.

Then, in the distance, came the rumble of a car, the sputter of an engine and a squeal of tires. Shane's brow furrowed, but he didn't risk looking back around the pillar to check the car he'd seen moments before. Whoever it was, they were gone now. And they were taking the herd with them - even the few stragglers that had started to wander just inside the building were turning around to make their way back outside and follow the rest.

As the last one rounded the corner, Shane exhaled out a heavy breath and let his head thump back against the pillar, thanking every deity he could think of for the narrow escape. He quickly made his way over to the girls, each hand reaching for a twin to pull them to his chest. Relief flooded him as he kept an eye on the entrance and saw no sign of movement. He didn't like the fact someone had been there, but it was the reason they were all still alive and he knew it.

"Go look for coats, quickly. This won't be a wasted trip. But stay close." 

Mia nodded straight away, but Sophie hesitated, clutching onto Shane for just a moment longer than necessary before pulling away and taking her sister’s hand again. Mia frowned and Shane gave her a questioning look, but she forced herself to smile to cover for her sister and lifted their joined hands up.

“We’ll stick together,” she said lightly. “Promise.”

Shane’s brow furrowed just slightly, but he didn’t protest when Mia gently tugged Sophie away in a slow, cautious walk towards a promising-looking store.

“You good?” she murmured softly. “I’ll go in first.”

“Okay,” Sophie mumbled distractedly, hand tracing over her lower abdomen.

Mia sighed. “Sophie.”

“I’m good,” her sister replied, shaking herself out of her dazed funk. “Let’s just get this over with, okay?”

Mia squeezed her hand once, then ducked under the half-lowered shutter at the entrance to the store and felt Sophie do the same right behind her. She quickly cleared the area of both walkers and humans, grateful nothing and nobody had made it under the shutter, then headed over to the racks of winter coats as Sophie trailed down the next aisle along.

They moved in silence for several long moments, Mia shooting constant glances at her younger sister over the racks as she waited for her to speak. She knew she wanted to – it was only a matter of time. Sophie wasn’t good at keeping secrets, especially not from her. The longer time dragged on, the more worried she got. This was big, whatever it was.

“I been thinkin’ ‘bout what Shane said,” Sophie eventually confessed, pulling out a coat and inspecting it. “When you… Before you miscarried, you knew what was going on. With your body?”

“Uh…” Mia struggled to form words, startled by the topic. “Yeah.”

“How?” Sophie’s tone was light, almost indifferent as she put the coat back in the rack.

“Just felt like somethin’ was different, I guess,” Mia told her honestly. She selected a warm-looking coat of her own and held it up to her body. “Tender boobs, nausea… Everythin’- Everything they did hurt more. Inside, y’know?”

“More sensitive,” Sophie supplied.

Mia nodded, unsure where her sister was going with that line of questioning. It had come out of nowhere.

“And did you…” Sophie’s fingers stalled as she chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully. “Did you get that metallic taste in your mouth?”

“You mean other than from the blood from…” Mia trailed off and closed her eyes, shunning the memories. “Yeah.”

“Right.” Sophie nodded to herself. “Been wonderin’ ‘bout that part.”

Just like that, the penny dropped.

“No,” Mia whispered.

Sophie inhaled a shaky breath and moved on to the next coat like she hadn’t just dropped that particular bombshell. Mia’s hand snapped out over the top of the rack to still her, eyes wide and breath stuttering in her throat.

“Sophie.”

“My period hasn’t come,” Sophie mumbled. “You know I’m never out of sync with you. Ever. Even when they’re messed up.”

“My period started well over a week ago,” Mia stated, disbelief written all over her features. “And it was _two weeks_ late to begin with. But you’ve been keeping this from me this whole time?”

“Mia,” Sophie sighed sadly. She closed her eyes as a pained expression crossed her face. “That’s not-”

“No, don’t try that shit,” Mia interjected. “How could you not tell me something like this?!”

“I didn’t realize at first,” Sophie muttered, head ducked low. “Didn’t even occur to me until Shane…”

Mia felt a jolt of anger hit her. “ _Shane_ knows?!”

“No!” Sophie reached out to try to shush her, shooting a panicked glance at the shutter. “No, of course not! Keep your voice down!”

Mia growled under her breath. That was ten times fucking worse, somehow. “Are you kidding me right now?”

“You can’t tell him!” Sophie pleaded. “Mia, I’m begging you, please…”

Mia stared at her sister for long moments as anger boiled in her veins at what her twin was asking from her. _Just... and the fact that.._. Mia couldn't take it.

She ripped her arm from Sophie's grip and raised a finger to point at her sister’s chest. "I will _not_ lie to him Sophie, not ever. Not even for you."

Sophie whimpered desperately and shook her head, panicked. “Mia…”

She leaned in close, voice low and dangerous. "If he asks, I'm telling him. Plain and simple. But until then, I’ve got nothing to do with this."

She took a step back, realizing she was almost pulling Sophie through the coat rack and into the aisle with her. Sophie’s breath escaped her in a rush as she recoiled, arms wrapping around herself and one hand going to her stomach reflexively.

 _Fuck._ This was happening.

"Sophie... How could you not tell me?" Mia turned and started back on the coats, needing something to do with her hands so didn't try to strangle her sister. "You always tell me everything. Even if you didn't know for sure yet, you should have told me something was off."

She closed her eyes and breathed, evened out her heart beat from the shock of it all hitting her. She suddenly remembered her sister’s face as she stammered and begged for the two of them to let her nap on the sofa with them that night they’d thought she was sick. The raw panic she’d seen but hadn’t been able to understand at first. That _something_ that told her that it wasn’t just a one off.

“You were gonna tell us,” she realized bitterly. “But you pussied out.”

Sophie started to say something, but Mia stopped her with a sharp pointed look. It really hurt that she’d kept something like that from her, and Mia was angry she wanted to keep it from Shane as well. He had a right to know. But she was caught in the middle. No matter what she’d said, she had _everything_ to do with this now. She was guilty by association and responsible for that baby by default.

"Go over to the pharmacy and grab prenatal vitamins, anything else like it. Do it now." She turned to look back at her twin, whose dark hair was braided and frizzy from the heat. _How long would it be before that started to grow and change?_ "We will not be Lori. _You_ will not be Lori. You need to tell him. Soon."

Sophie nodded, then stared down at the floor. Mia gritted her teeth and grabbed a random coat from the rack that would have to do. She paused, then grabbed another one for Sophie in a larger size, since she’d obviously be needing the extra room in a few months.

When she looked back over at Sophie, she noticed her twin hadn’t even moved, but her face… she looked so vulnerable, so lost… Mia sighed, trying to reign in her anger.

“I’m sorry,” Sophie whispered. A fat tear rolled down her cheek, and Mia instantly felt the anger in her chest crack slightly. She hadn’t even thought about how hard it must have been for Sophie to not have told her. How scared she must have been, to not be able to say it. But that didn’t excuse her secrecy. “I’m so sorry.”

“Fuck,” Mia muttered, rushing round to the other aisle as her sister seemed to crumple under the weight of her own burden now she’d voiced it. “Soph, don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed, tiny body shaking violently. “I’m sorry.”

Mia wrapped her in a tight embrace, smoothing her hand over her hair to try to soothe her. “Hey, it’s alright.”

“No, it’s not,” Sophie wept. “It’s not alright, Mia, I can’t be… I can’t…”

Sophie shuddered, and Mia had no idea what to do. She wasn’t sure what was affecting her sister more – fear of being pregnant, worry about the danger, anxiety about Shane’s reaction…

“How am I gonna do this?” Sophie whimpered. “How am I gonna keep a baby safe, how am I meant to… what if… what if she gets sick or something hurts him or we run out of food? How can I… What do I…”

“You’re not alone,” Mia promised her. “Soph, you’re not gonna do this on your own.”

“How am I gonna tell Shane?” Sophie whispered. “I can’t do this to him. I can’t put him in that position again.”

“You haven’t got a choice,” Mia pointed out. “He knew this was a possibility. Christ, we talked about this exact thing a couple months ago!”

“The reality of this is different from a conversation,” Sophie ground out. “Trust me.”

Mia couldn’t deny that. “Regardless, he has a right to know.”

“And I’ll tell him!” Sophie snapped, pushing away from her sister. “When _I’m_ ready.”

“And when will that be?” Mia challenged. “Or do you think you can hide it until suddenly a little baby pops out?”

“Fuck you, Mia.” Sophie let out a bitter laugh. “This is why I didn’t want to tell you. I knew you’d do this.”

“I may be your sister, but I’m also Shane’s partner,” Mia countered. “Just like you’re supposed to be. So forgive me for refusing to betray his trust, but I cannot believe you’d even think, for a single second, that I’d lie to him like that!”

“I’m not asking you to lie, Mia! I’m asking you to give me a second to process the fact that in a few months I’ll have to give birth to a _baby_ while the whole world is falling apart around us!” Sophie’s voice cracked, and Mia watched it all hit her at once. “Oh, God…”

“Girls?”

The twins froze at the sound of Shane’s footsteps approaching the store, drawn in by the noise. Mia shot Sophie a pointed look and threw her the coat she’d picked out before roughly wiping the tears from her sister’s cheeks.

“We’re good!” Mia shouted, then lowered her voice. “Aren’t we?”

Sophie nodded and tried to compose herself.

“C’mon, we gotta go!”

Sophie took a deep breath, then forced herself to smile before quickly heading towards the store entrance. Mia followed after her and took the hand Shane offered to help them both out from under the shutter before straightening up and painting a relaxed expression on her face.

Shane looked between them, unconvinced. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Sophie said lightly. “Everything’s fine.”

Mia shuffled her sister towards the Jeep, even though Sophie still felt stiff under her hands. Despite everything, she couldn't just not be there for her twin. They weren't wired to ignore each other or fight or lie to the other. They just weren't. So, she put Sophie in the back with herself, making up some small excuse for Shane that wasn’t exactly a lie - that Sophie was just shaken up from seeing a herd that size for the first time that close.

As Mia went to hop into the Jeep, her eyes caught sight of something on the pavement, covered in trash and blood and dirt and broken glass. A backpack. A backpack that was definitely not there when they’d left the Jeep earlier to go inside.

Without thinking about it, she grabbed it and tossed it onto the floorboard at her feet before slamming the door. It could have had supplies or ammunition inside, she told herself. Shane peeled out the lot and headed home, away from the direction of the herd.

She reached over and squeezed Sophie's hand tightly in her own, trying to reassure her twin even though nothing about the situation was okay. Sophie was freaking out and rightly so, but guilt ate at Mia for keeping it from Shane. She hated it.

So did Sophie.

Shane was their rock. Their savior. Their protector and lover and provider. He was everything they needed and wanted in a man to keep them safe in this world. And everything they'd ever dreamed of even before this new world came to be. He'd take care of them. He'd promised...

“Shane, stop the Jeep.”

“Wh-”

“Stop the Jeep!” Sophie whimpered, barely waiting for the vehicle to slow before shoving the door open and tumbling out. She fell almost onto her hands and knees and retched violently, but there wasn’t anything in her stomach to be expelled.

Shane was out the Jeep and by her side in seconds, looking just as panicked as she felt.

“Darlin’?”

“Sorry,” Sophie croaked, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. “I’m okay, I’m okay…”

“I ain’t ever seen you like this before,” Shane worried, then shot a glance at Mia, who was just staring at the two of them in silence. “What’s-”

“Hormones,” Sophie quickly deflected. Not a lie. “Think it all just hit me quick, seein’ that herd.” Not a lie either. “I’m sorry - don’t mean to make you worry.”

“S’alright, as long as you’re okay?” Shane ran a hand through her hair and Sophie leaned into the touch as she tried not to cry. He was so gentle, so careful… The guilt made her nauseous again, but she fought it back down. “Hey, hey, hey… Talk to me, Darlin’.”

“I can’t lose you,” she whispered. Not now. Not ever. She couldn’t make it without him, but this pregnancy… It terrified her. She wanted it. She wanted it so fucking badly, now it was here, but Shane already carried the burden of the two of them – how could she add to that weight when she didn’t even know for sure? She had to _know,_ not just _feel_ pregnant before she could tell him. It would be cruel to give him that news then take it away again, just like Lori had. “I can’t.”

“I ain’t goin’ anywhere, Sweetheart,” Shane swore. “Not even a herd could change that.”

Sophie wrapped her arms around him tightly as she tried to stifle a sob. He meant it. Every word. And suddenly she wanted to tell him right there and then, but couldn’t do it on the side of some shit road in the middle of nowhere. It wasn’t like the baby – if there was one, she wanted to say, but she knew deep down it wasn’t a case of _if –_ was going anywhere.

“Hey, c’mon now,” Shane soothed. “Everythin’s alright, Darlin’.”

“I know,” Sophie breathed, then leaned back to kiss him tenderly, just once. He held her gaze for a moment before smiling and helping her to her feet.

“Come sit in the front with me,” he told her softly. “We ain’t got far now.”

Sophie smiled back at him as he helped her into the front of the Jeep, then caught Mia’s gaze in the rearview mirror and nodded. _When we get back._

Mia dipped her chin, then turned to look out the window, withdrawing from the situation best she could. She was torn – loyal to her sister, but just as bonded to Shane – and the easiest way to deal with it was to say nothing.

The rest of the journey passed quickly, with Shane constantly looking over at Sophie to check she was okay. Guilt burned a hole in her chest, overriding the nausea, and she reached out to take his hand and bring his knuckles to her lips for a kiss. _When we get back._

As soon as they were pulled up outside the cabin, Mia hopped down and slung the backpack over her shoulder before grabbing their coats from the backseat. Shane muttered something about doing a quick perimeter check, so the girls both headed inside without him.

“When he gets in, I’ll tell him,” Sophie murmured as they dumped their coats in the main bedroom. “Mia, I swear…”

“Damn straight, you will,” Mia replied harshly. “Shoulda told him when you almost threw up.”

“In the middle of the road?” Sophie shook her head. “No. I wanna do it here, in our home.”

Mia nodded and tried to be understanding. “Then we’ll wait by the fire.”

She grabbed her sister’s elbow and guided her down the hallway to take a seat on the sofa, then dropped the backpack to the ground and flopped down beside her twin. She ran a hand through her short hair and sighed wearily.

“What’s that?” Sophie asked quietly.

“Huh?”

“The backpack,” Sophie clarified. “Where’d you get it?”

“Oh, um… It was by the Jeep. Think someone dropped it,” Mia replied.

“Open it, then,” Sophie encouraged. “Maybe it’s got ammo or somethin’.”

Mia laughed under her breath, biting back a comment about Sophie’s hypocritical nosiness, then bent over to grab the bag. She flipped open the top and frowned.

“Photos?” Sophie reached in and pulled out a stack of polaroids.

Mia shrugged and rifled through the rest of the backpack to find a map and a strange device that looked like it belonged on some kind of spy show. “The Hell is this?”

“That’s a listenin’ device,” Shane told them as he headed through the door. “Where’d you get that from?”

“Mia found a backpack,” Sophie replied, ignoring how her heart jumped at the sight of him. Out of excitement or fear - she wasn’t sure which. “Got some really random shit inside – come see.”

Shane sat on the edge of the sofa, tugging Sophie close to his side and kissing her hair while Mia moved to sit on the floor across from him. She was looking through pictures, studying them intently, and Shane couldn’t stop himself from toeing the bag closer so he could grab what appeared to be a map from one of the compartments.

It was tattered on the edges but folded neatly, and he carefully opened it up, eyes narrowing as he found sharpie marks and notes written and scrawled across is. Territories were marked, small towns either crossed or circled. Their cabin was on a backroad far, far from those lines and not yet marked down, but he still felt uneasy.

There must have been big groups of people involved to have that much marked off. Shane gently tossed a disc, listening device, and a Polaroid camera onto the couch beside him as he emptied the bag of the rest of its contents. His free hand rested on Sophie's thigh, thumb rubbing gently as she leaned against him.

"Shane..." Mia's voice came from the floor and he looked up. She was staring at a picture, two more clutched in her other hand, blue eyes wider than he'd ever seen. Her hands were shaking.

"Baby?"

"They were watching us..." She glanced up from the picture, moving her shaking hand towards Shane.

He took the pictures from her hands. There were three. The top one was taken from a distance, his own face looking out from the driver’s seat of the Jeep as they pulled into the lot. The girls were obscured, but anyone who saw the photo would have been able to tell there were two figures in the Jeep with him. 

The next was a clear shot of his side profile as he looked around, pistol in hand as the girls in the background were preparing for any sign of walkers. He could see Mia's face clear as day, but Sophie's was turned, just her profile and hand on her lower abdomen visible in the background.

The last captured both girls facing Shane while his back was to the camera, their full forms were in the frame, this time. Clear faces and all.

His fist nearly crumpled the Polaroids in his fist as he seethed. Someone was watching them. For how long? What purpose? 

"Shane?" Sophie's voice caught his attention and he turned to see a little black notebook in her trembling hands, open with pen scratches on the pages. 

_One male._

_Two females._

_Threesome-type relationship?_

_Close-knit unit._

The date was scribbled at the top. And it was so strange seeing an actual date after so long just living through the seasons. His hand took the notebook as he stared down at the otherwise blank page. There was nothing else on it about them. No names, no descriptions, nothing.

He handed the notebook back to Sophie again and watched Mia flick through the other pictures in her hands. Her brow furrowed as she plucked one out from the stack.

"How old’d you say Carl was, Shane?" The question caught him off guard, body jolting forward to stare, almost upside down, at the photograph in her hand.

Shane's entire body froze.

“What is it?” Sophie wondered, stroking a calming hand over his back. “Shane?”

She shifted on the sofa as Shane snatched the photo from Mia’s grip and brought it closer to his face, fingers trembling so much Sophie could barely make out the image printed on the surface. She reached out to steady the photo and frowned. _A boy in a Sheriff’s hat._

“I don’t get it,” Sophie murmured, glancing at Mia, who was staring at Shane with a knowing look on her face. She suddenly felt out the loop. “What’s with the hat?”

“Sophie, stop talking,” Mia warned, then reached forward to touch Shane’s wrist. Connected. Just the two of them. “Shane, look at me.”

As Shane’s jaw clenched, Sophie glanced towards Mia’s lap at the next photo in the pile that none of them had noticed yet.

A woman with dark waves like hers, next to a tired-looking man.

She picked the photo up and stared, not at the couple, but at the baby in the woman’s arms. The image was grainy, but she’d recognize those eyes anywhere.

_Oh. Now she got it._

“That’s Carl, isn’t it?” She heard Mia say as Sophie’s free hand moved to cover her abdomen. She closed her eyes against the ice that flooded through her veins. It was like staring at the future, that photo. Her future. She clutched the photo to her chest and tried to remember how to breathe, how to think, how to function…

She opened her eyes as Shane nodded jerkily, then looked over to see darkness start to cloud his features. She swallowed hard and slowly shifted away from Shane until she was standing up, but the movement startled him into staring right at her. She froze, a rabbit caught in his crosshairs, and struggled to remind herself that rage she saw wasn’t for her. It was justified. It was about his family. The one whose image she held in her shaking hands.

“Wh-What’s that in your hand.” It wasn’t quite a question, but wasn’t an order either.

“I…” Sophie stuttered. What was she supposed to say? _Hey, honey, I think I just saw the daughter you’ve been grieving for, before you even discovered she existed?_ “I’m not sure.”

“Give it to me.”

Sophie hesitated.

“Now.”

“Shane,” Mia calmed softly as the man started to stand.

He ignored her, drawing himself up to his full height and towering over the younger twin. “Sophie.”

She took a step back on instinct, but he was quick to grab for her wrist and draw her back in harshly enough to make her stumble. Sophie didn’t fight him, just stared, locked in some kind of horrific tableau.

“Shane, you’re hurting her.”

“Give me that photo,” he repeated darkly, focus purely on Sophie. He still had a modicum of control, but it was fragile and she knew it, knew he had reached his tipping point, but was powerless to stop it. Too stunned by the image that had burned itself into her brain, twisted and warped until it was her face on Lori’s body and the nausea rose up with a vengeance.

_You cannot give that to him and take it away, you cannot get his hopes up, you cannot be Lori. You cannot put him through that. You have to be sure._

“Darlin’.”

Tears welled in her eyes. That word should never have been uttered so dangerously. Like it was a curse, not something precious.

“I will not ask you again.”

The barely masked venom was enough to spring Sophie’s body free from its cage, and she all but shoved the photograph into his hands before wrenching her wrist out of his grasp and hurrying over to the fire, putting a clear six feet between them. She wrapped one arm around her stomach and brought her other hand up to cover her mouth as Shane inhaled sharply.

_Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God._

Mia’s voice betrayed her concern. “Shane?”

“That bitch.” His voice was wrecked. Sophie closed her eyes as tears welled up inside them. “I fuckin’ knew it. I knew that baby was mine.”

“That’s definitely them?”

“Oh, yeah.” Shane chuckled darkly. “That’s them alright. Rick. Lori. My baby… _My. Kid.”_

“Shane, listen to me-”

“They been playin’ house with _my daughter_ while I been… while I was left out in the cold to die?” Sophie heard the rustling of papers as Shane looked through the rest of the photos and grabbed for the map. “All of ‘em. They been right there, this whole time?”

Sophie opened her eyes and looked over at Shane, who was pacing back and forth with wild eyes and a snarl on his face. He looked like a caged animal, wounded and dangerous, and she wanted to go to him, soothe him, help him, but some instinct kept her locked where she was, both hands covering her stomach as she curled in on herself. Protecting. Shielding.

“That’s a fuckin’ joke! After all they did, after _all_ that bullshit, they survived?!” He flung his hands up and shook his head. “How the _fuck_ is that right?! Bet he ain’t the good guy, now. Bet he killed more than I ever did, no fuckin’ way they made it that far otherwise. Fuckin’ hypocrite. And she… Oh, and she…”

“Shane,” Mia said firmly as she took in the look on Sophie’s face. “Stop.”

“ _Shane, stop, leave me alone, it’s not yours, it’ll never be yours, Rick is my husband, you lied to me, stay, don’t leave, you asshole, you…”_ Shane rattled off all the things Lori had said to him, all the lies, all the contradictions, all the manipulations that pulled on the puppet strings and, Christ, he’d let her, he’d let her fuck with his head and now…

Mia stepped forward and reached for Shane’s arm, stilling his pacing as he kept muttering and scrubbing his other hand over his skull like he could tear the memories right out of it. “Sophie, go to the bedroom.”

Sophie whimpered. “Mia…”

“It’s okay,” Mia murmured, not taking her eyes off Shane for a second. This was it, now, the moment she’d known was coming ever since he first whispered his confession into her skin and told her what had happened to him while Sophie had slept on, unaware. “Just go. You can’t take the stress right now. You gotta be careful.”

Sophie hesitated a moment, then sobbed. “Shane, I’m sorry.”

“Go now,” Mia urged calmly. She reached up and cupped Shane’s cheek as his eyes flitted between things that weren’t really in front of him. “I’ll come get you in a minute.”

Shane kept clicking his jaw, clenching his teeth together. His hand ran up his neck to grip at his hair sharply, threatening to yank it out with his own strength. 

"Shane?" Mia whispered, stroking her thumb over his cheek.

It was like her touch was a fire branding his flesh. He leapt away from her touch and started pacing again, hands tugging at his hair and head down.

He was mumbling to himself under his breath, but she couldn't understand a single syllable of what was coming from his lips. Mia scooted back, hips touching the arm of the couch as he moved.

She'd seen him angry before. Seen him upset. The rage in him after she was grabbed those months ago. But this… this was different. Shane was acting strange, almost crazy as he stalked back and forth. It put Mia on edge even though she tried to remain calm.

"Shane," she tried. 

Nothing. 

She tried again. “Shane?”

Still nothing. 

"Shane!"

He finally stopped and looked over at her, shaking his head as if to quiet the voices no one could hear but him. 

"Lori… She... I kept ‘em safe..." Tears threatened to spill from his grief-stricken eyes and he smacked the side of his head with his fist as the voices rose up and started screaming. "Told me she loved me, always me and not Rick... God, I was so confused… And then... and then Rick came back and she pushed me away like- like I was _nothin_ ’! And Carl..." He shuddered and the tears flowed freely now. "She took Carl from me, I loved that kid like my ow-my own flesh and blood… Took _everythin’_ from me."

"Shane, stop..." Mia watched as he abused himself, fear and worry lacing her features. She took a step forward.

"Rick came and he fuckin’ took it all back.. Carl, Lori, the group... even... _FUCK!_ " He slammed his fist into the wall, wood splintering a bit under his strength. Breathed heavy, chest heaving. 

"Shane?" Mia asked softly again, her voice barely above a whisper as Shane tried and failed to calm himself, too wound up with grief and anger to think straight. To remember she already knew most of this horror story.

"The baby was mine. She pushed me away and talked Rick into killing me and leavin’ me behind..." He chuckled darkly. "Thing is, Rick’s too much a of a damned pussy to even do it right. Couldn't do _anything_ right." He growled and punched the wall again, all that festering anger boiling and bubbling inside him spilling out like acid. "Bet he's wizened up now, though, since they're all alive!"

He pointed to his skull, back still turned to Mia, who was just feet from him. "She fucked with my head. And I... I couldn't protect her, the baby, Carl… I couldn't, cause Rick took them, but he-he wouldn’t do, he wouldn’t-" 

"Come on..." Mia gently took his hand in hers, and even though he grip nearly crushed her small fingers, she didn’t make a sound. Just pulled him from the house and out into the yard. Further away from Sophie.

"They're alive... Playing fuckin’ house with my kid?" His grip turned violent and Mia was suddenly slammed into the side of the Jeep, losing her breath and staring wide-eyed up at his hulking frame. The position was familiar and alien all at once – some kind of twisted paradox of their usual rough play.

"My _kid_! They took my own baby from me, and _fuck_..." His fist hit the glass of the window and Mia heard it crack under his strength. She stayed still, knowing he had to work through this before he'd come back to her. She wasn’t scared of him. She was scared _for_ him.

He stepped back and grabbed at his curls, yanking and tearing. Smacking and punching himself upside the head as if trying to make it all stop stop. The memories. The voices. The pain. She had to do something… He'd rip himself apart if she didn’t. 

She grabbed his chin in her hands, wrenching him down to her height as she tried to kiss him. Long, painful moments passed as he stayed stock still against her lips. She didn't relent, just held there, drawing his focus onto her to get rid of his anger and adrenaline. 

And suddenly it was like a fire ignited under his boots. He kissing her back, but it was primal and feral, all teeth and tongue and he didn't care if she was breathing or gasping as he pushed against her body hard. He slammed her back into the Jeep again, pressing into her with all of his strength, holding nothing back this time.

"They took her from me..." he growled out, snapped his teeth into her neck like a Pitbull and held her there for a moment as she trembled in his grip. 

"We'll get her back."

Her words make him snarl out like an enraged animal and he gripped her sides bruisingly tight, lifting her up only to slam her back into the Jeep yet again and making her back ache from the abuse. It still hadn’t fully recovered from the last time.

"Gonna kill Rick. Took everythin’ from me." He reached up and she heard a rip more than felt her black tank top shredding to nothing in a half second, leaving her bare chested. "Know where he is now... Kill ‘em all."

His eyes were nothing but black pits of wrath and Mia wanted to cringe from it. She’d seen that kind of look before, but never from Shane. Never from him. But she didn’t. She held his gaze, forcing herself to see _him,_ not them.

He had her pressed so hard against the Jeep that she could feel the cracked window creak and split a little bit more under her back and hips, but when his hands started working on her pants she let them, didn’t try to fight it. Didn’t want to, either.

Shane needed it. Needed an outlet where he wouldn't hurt himself or break things that couldn't be fixed. Sophie wouldn't be able to deal with that much darkness, not all of it, not right now. But Mia could. Always would. She knew his shadows match her own and she welcomed it. Welcomed whatever he was going to do because it would help him, like he always helped her.

He ripped her pants straight down the middle, yanking her hips roughly as he pulled the denim from her thighs and tugged her panties out of the way. His rough, thick fingers found her soaking wet and ready, body just as willing as her mind. And that was the difference between this and _that._  Even in his furious haze, he still had to know she wanted it. Still made sure. He wasn’t completely gone, just buried deep.

“Can’t do this, can’t just sit here, she’s my baby, she’s my kid.” He fumbled for his belt with shaking fingers. “I can’t… can’t just abandon her, can’t leave her, can’t-”

“You won’t have to,” Mia soothed as she reached between them and undid his belt for him. “We’ll fix this. We’ll help you get her back.”

“Never fuckin’ loved me,” he muttered, hands gripping her hips tightly, almost painful in their desperation. “Never fuckin’ cared, never wanted me, never…”

“We do,” Mia whispered as she curled her fingers around his adrenaline-hardened length and coaxed him to give in. “Shane, look at me.”

Her other hand cupped his cheek, tilting his face up. He wouldn’t meet her gaze.

“We care,” she told him softly. “We want you.”

He finally dragged his eyes up to hers and she smiled.

“We love you.”

Shane froze.

“So it’s okay,” she whispered, pressing her forehead to his. “I can take it. I know you won’t hurt me. You need this.” She guided his tip to her entrance so he could feel how wet she was, how willing she was, how much she wanted it… “You can let go now, Shane. Come on, baby.”

She kissed him tenderly, fingers sliding up into his hair to soothe the ache his own must have left with their tugging. Shane exhaled a groan as his body gradually unfroze, allowing her to sink down in his hold just enough for him to slip inside as his lips finally started moving with hers.

“That’s it,” she murmured, lifting her other arm so it was wrapped around his neck and both her hands were massaging his scalp. “C’mon.”

He groaned as he bottomed out, and Mia let out a tiny sound of pleasure that seemed to set something off inside of him. He growled, then attacked her lips hungrily, hands roaming her body as each thrust pushed her harder against the Jeep.

“Mia,” he grunted. “My girl.”

“Yes,” Mia hissed as she threw her head back at the feel of him bumping against her cervix, the sharp ache adding to the overwhelming sensations flooding her body. “Yes, that’s it.”

Shane moved harshly against her, his lips sucking the breath from her lungs as he slammed her into the side of the Jeep again and again, hips unrelenting. Adrenaline flowed through him unhindered, setting everything ablaze.

His mouth latched onto her neck, teeth barely scraping over her skin as his tongue laved over the marks he’d left mere hours before, drawn to them instinctually. Mia moaned, clutching his shoulders as she started to tighten around him.

It wasn’t long until he found his release, grunting and huffing into her neck as she cried out and dug her nails into his skin, legs wrapped tightly around his hips as he leaned his weight into her, putting just the right amount of pressure on her clit with his pubic bone to set her off as well.

"You with me, Shane?" She felt him nod into the crook of her neck, chest heaving with the intense orgasm still flowing through her.

"Yeah… yeah, baby, I'm here."

His lips ran over the pulse point in her neck as he breathed her in, let her scent and body and presence calm him those final steps down from the emotional roller coaster he’d been on ever since he’d seen those photos.

He gingerly pulled back from her body, guilt hitting him as she gasped and whimpered. Semen was dripping from between her legs and her inner thighs clearly starting to bruise. Multiple hand and finger marks were scattered all over her sides and hips. 

"Jesus, baby… I'm-"

"Don't you even try it." She let her feet touch down on the ground, albeit more leaning against the Jeep than actually standing. Her voice was strong, though, and left no room for argument. "I wanted you to, Shane. I wanted it, and you needed it." 

He started to reach out for her but hesitated, hand in the air between them until Mia's own took hold of it and placed it against her chest, palm flat over her heart with her fingers twined in his. Silent understanding flowed between them as they gazed at each other. She wasn't scared of the darkest part of him. And now he knew it.

"Thank you." He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close as he kissed her temple.

"Anytime, Shane." She was smiling, but he could see she was hurting inside. He was rough her - _brutal_ more like it, judging by the spots on her back that were quickly turning into reddening bruises.

He stuffed himself back inside his pants and scooped her up in a single movement, cradling her to his chest as her jeans hung in tatters from her knees and calves. Her torso was bare, and her sweaty hair tangled over her neck that was red with bites and spots where his teeth has nibbled at her like jerky.

The moment they were back inside, he set her down on the floor by the fire and knelt down to cut her remaining clothes off with his knife before helping her toe out of her boots as she leaned on his shoulder. His lips brushed over her hip as he stood.

“C’mon, let’s get you into bed, we can talk ab-”

Mia placed a firm hand on his chest to stop him in his tracks. “Shane, wait.”

“What?” He frowned, and Mia sighed softly.

“Sophie’s in there.”

Shane closed his eyes as guilt flooded through him once more. _I will not ask you again. Shane, you’re hurting her._ “Oh, fuck.”

He looked like he was about to be sick.

“Hey, don’t do that. Just let me… let me talk to her first, okay?” Mia cupped his cheek and smiled in what she hoped was a reassuring way. “I’m sure she’s fine, but she’s probably just shaken up.”

“I shouldn’t’ve lost it like that,” Shane muttered. “I shouldn’t’ve been so-”

“Stop,” Mia commanded. “Just stop, okay? It’s already forgiven.”

Shane shook his head and clenched his jaw, and Mia groaned under her breath. Nothing could talk him down apart from Sophie saying the words herself, but that required her leaving him out there alone while she talked to her.

“Shane, just wait here,” she urged. “I’ll call for you in a sec, I promise.”

She planted a gentle kiss on his cheek, then hurried towards the bedroom, grimacing with each step that triggered aches she knew would become pains tomorrow. She knocked on the door twice, then let herself in. Sophie was pacing on the other side of the room, arms wrapped around herself as she froze and turned to face the door.

“It’s just me,” Mia assured her.

Sophie nodded and looked down at the floor as she chewed her bottom lip nervously. Mia closed the door behind her and carefully moved towards her sister, trying to hide the twinge of pain in her back as she did so.

“He hurt you.” Sophie whispered. _Of course she’d have noticed._

“It was consensual,” Mia promised. “Completely consensual. I asked him to do it.”

Sophie shook her head, doubt written across her face.

“Sophie, he wouldn’t have hands if he’d touched me against my will. You know that.”

The younger twin exhaled a slow breath and shrugged. “I guess.”

“Don’t do that,” Mia chided. “Don’t let what’s going on inside you change how you see him. You know what that was out there. You _know_ why he reacted like that.”

“I do,” she eventually agreed, voice quiet and almost timid. “But Mia… What am I supposed to do? If he snaps like that again, I won't be able to control those instincts. I won't be able to rationalize it. So how am I meant to tell him, now? How can I say I’m... when _that_ just got dropped on him?”

Mia reached out for her sister’s hand and squeezed. “You don’t.”

“What?”

“You can’t tell him,” Mia sighed. It killed her to say it, but she knew it was true. Shane wouldn’t be able to handle everything at once, not right now. He was too focused on his already born child – he didn’t have enough mental processing power left to comprehend having another one on the way. “Not yet.”

Sophie shook her head. “But you said-”

“I know what I said,” Mia murmured tiredly. “But you were right. I get it. You want to make sure it’s certain before you tell him. It’s not fair to dangle a maybe. It’d be cruel.”

“I know. That’s what I was trying to-”

Mia cupped Sophie’s cheek to quiet her. “I know you were. And I’m sorry I didn’t listen.”

“Look, that doesn’t matter now. We just need to find a way to confirm it and then I’ll tell him, but we gotta get that baby first. She has to be our priority," Sophie stressed. Mia blinked, surprised at her sister’s ferocity. “I know that sounds horrible and cruel, stealing her away from them, but it’s _his_ baby. They should never have kept her from him, and we can’t just leave her, not when-… Mia, why are you smiling?”

“That's exactly what I was planning to do,” she replied with a smirk. “I’m glad you’re already on board.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Sophie frowned. “Mia, I’m not… I might be a mess right now, but I still love him. I still want him to be happy, I-”

“I know that.” Mia kissed her sister’s cheek. “But he doesn’t.”

“Oh, God.” Sophie closed her eyes and ran her hand through her hair. _Fuck._ Last thing he’d seen was her running away. Her feet started towards the door without hesitation. “Shit, I gotta go talk to him, he’s gotta understand I-”

Mia’s hand on her arm stopped her from taking another step and Sophie turned to find her sister smiling fondly at her.

“Shane?” she called, loud enough for him to hear as she kept her gaze on Sophie’s. “Can you come in, please?”

There was a pause as Sophie turned towards the door, but then it creaked open and Shane slowly walked in with a fearful expression on his face. His eyes immediately went to Sophie’s wrist, which was already tender and starting to bruise, then traced over her whole body, taking in how she was trembling but trying not to, how her eyes were filled with worry but held a hint of fear. The way she shuffled her weight from foot to foot anxiously, like she wanted to go to him but was holding back.

“Darlin’?” he whispered, voice cracking at the sight of her.

“ _Shane…”_ Sophie rushed towards him, and he flinched, fully expecting her to slap him, then groaned in relief when she wrapped her arms around his neck tightly instead. His hands splayed across her back, holding her close, and he buried his face in her hair to breathe her in, remind himself that against all the odds, he hadn’t lost her, hadn’t lost either of them… They were still there. _Fuck, they were still_ there _. With him._

“I’m so sorry,” he breathed. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I know,” Sophie sighed, kissing his shoulder.

“There’s no excusing it, but you gotta know I never meant to-”

“I know,” she whispered. “ _God…_ I know.”

She leaned back just far enough to move her hands to his cheeks, forcing him to look at her. His remorseful eyes told her everything she needed to know. With the panicked haze from before now gone, all that was left was her feelings for him and how he truly was. Even at his worst, he’d still kept control enough to restrain himself from lashing out completely. Misjudging his own strength wasn’t the same as deliberately bruising her. Had those… maternal instincts not kicked in, she’d have never withdrawn from him.

She pressed her lips to his, but he shook his head and tried to move away.

“How can you let me near you after I-”

She kissed him again, harder this time, then moaned as his body gave in to hers, softening under her touch until the hard tension had seeped from his bones and he was pulling her closer by her hips.

“I love you,” she said simply. To her, it was that easy. And that was the only explanation he needed to hear. “So let’s talk. All three of us. Let’s figure out how we’re gonna get your daughter home.”


	9. Build Your Fences (set restrictions)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mia had taken the lenses and was scouting from a few branches up while Shane pointed things out to Sophie, searching into the windows of the last house on the left. Watching. Waiting. She reached down and tapped Shane's shoulder, indicated to the house, and handed the lenses back over. 
> 
> Shane’s fingers tightened around the binoculars so tightly, the casing almost fractured.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're almost at the chapter that started this all!
> 
> This monster fic was originally just a series of emails between the two of us, but has taken on a life of its own and we hope you're loving it as much as we enjoy writing it.
> 
> Let us know your thoughts or any scenes you'd like to see and we'll do our best to slot them in!

It took them a full twenty-four hours to formulate a plan. Twenty-four fucking hours of no sleep, an unhealthy amount of instant coffee – for Shane and Mia, none for Sophie – and such an in-depth cross-examination of both the map they had found in the backpack and the one they already had from a previous run that all three of them knew every back road, every path, every _inch_ of the area surrounding Alexandria mirrored, flipped, upside-down…

All three of them could walk or drive there in their sleep, but Shane insisted on running point and, if the girls were honest, neither one of them cared to challenge him on it despite him being more exhausted than the two of them combined. This was his kid. His mission. His right to lead.

So, instead of arguing, they’d taken up their usual positions without needing to be told – Sophie riding shotgun, Mia sitting right behind Shane. He was fucking jittery, and the two of them knew it. Hell, they were, too. It was a big deal, what they were planning to do, and it wasn’t something they could rush into. It would take time, careful observation, back-up plans that ran from A-Z and back again… A lot of hard work, but it would have a massive pay-off once they succeeded.

Because they would. Failure was simply not an option.

Alexandria was a couple of hours away by vehicle, but they’d be walking the last mile or so just to make sure they weren’t spotted too early. One side of the safe-zone appeared to be lined by trees, and if they could get up into one, they’d have a pretty good view of the whole place without risking blowing their cover. That was the plan, anyway.

Shane was quiet most of the way there, but his hand kept straying to touch the twins almost absent-mindedly. Sophie’s thigh. Mia’s hand, where it laid on the shoulder of his seat. Sophie’s hair. A reminder they were both still there, that they had his back.

When he touched over the purple bruises on Sophie’s wrist from where he’d grabbed her, he lingered, and Sophie took that as her cue to slot their fingers together and hold on tight. The tension in his shoulders eased some, and as soon as Mia leaned forwards in her seat to slid her hands down to them, they relaxed even more.

“Nearly there,” he told them gruffly.

Sophie lifted their joined hands to her lips and kissed his knuckles. “Park up as soon as we’ve got cover – we’ll walk from here if we have to.”

Shane nodded and squeezed her fingers gratefully.

He kept going for another ten minutes, then another, so distracted by his over-loaded mind and exhausted body that he probably would have driven right up to the damned gates had Mia not brought him back into focus.

“Shane.” She pointed to a grove of trees that would act as the perfect hiding spot. “There.”

Once the Jeep engine went silent they sat there for several moments. Sophie's hands clutched tight around Shane's larger ones as Mia's roamed gently and soothingly over his chest and shoulders. 

"Come on, baby. Game time," Mia whispered into his shoulder. He nodded, taking a deep shallow breath to calm his racing heart. It was time. 

With careful quiet movements, they exited the Jeep. Shane took the lead, crouched low and scanning the area. Following the lines of trees and woods, keeping them hidden in the growth until he spotted what he wanted. A thick sturdy oak tree with a low hanging branch. 

Of his signal for where he was headed, the twins stayed low and followed him to the base of the tree. With so many months of training and getting to know their skills, Shane knew the girls could get into the tree with minimal help so he crouched down to the ground, facing towards the tree, and braced himself for what was about to happen. 

Sophie went first. Her feet hit the ground in a run as she leapt, one foot pushing off Shane's back, and launched herself to that one branch. Her hands found purchase and, using her momentum, she swung around once before moving to the next branch.

Shane couldn't watch her flying feat but knew she was in the tree because Mia's footsteps came next. She launched off his back, the tremble of leaves and limbs the only sign of her climbing higher. Graceful, as always.

And then it was his turn.

He wasn't anywhere near as nimble as the girls, but he was a Georgia boy born and bred. Climbing trees was in his blood and it was only moments before he was hidden in the branches like his girls. 

The walls around Alexandria were massive - maybe ten feet or more high of thick, solid steel and rusted metal. Impossible to scale from the outside. He climbed higher in the tree, staying close to the trunk and tugging out the small binoculars the girls had found weeks ago on a run. 

There were a few rows of neat two-storey houses lined up. Green grass and flowers were planted in their gardens. His blood began to sing. There were people about. Walking… Talking. _Laughing._

A gentle hand touched his ankle and Shane breathed himself back into calm. 

They didn't speak, not wanting to be heard or found out. Instead they used military signals and pointed to things of interest. Sophie scribbled down page after page as she observed the people milling about and the layout of the houses, noting the key players, the daily routines... anything they could use to get the upper hand when the time came.

Mia had taken the lenses and was scouting from a few branches up while Shane pointed things out to Sophie, searching into the windows of the last house on the left. Watching. Waiting. She reached down and tapped Shane's shoulder, indicated to the house, and handed the lenses back over. 

Shane’s fingers tightened around the binoculars so tightly, the casing almost fractured.

Carl was sitting on the porch with that fucking Sheriff’s hat he was too old for now on his head, like always. But one thing had changed. One big fucking thing. His too-long hair couldn’t hide it. A bandage, covering where his right eye should have been. And he would have questioned it, would have been concerned, but his attention was already focused on the baby girl in his lap.

_His. baby. girl._

Fuck, she was even more beautiful than the photo. Her blonde hair was probably from Lori’s mother’s side, but those curls… Shit, they were all his, and her eyes… Even from a distance, he could tell Sophie was right. They matched his own perfectly. But she didn’t look happy. Not at all. Her face was screwed up slightly, and Shane may have known fuck all about the proper development of an infant, but he could tell she was underweight.

In all their runs, they’d come across places with formula. There was no fucking way that group hadn’t been able to find any for her. It made no fucking sense.

Until, suddenly, it did.

“ _Lori,”_ he hissed as the waif-like woman emerged from the house and walked down the steps without so much as glancing at her children. The stumbling feet, the wonky gait… She was drunk. The state of her confirmed she’d probably been that way for a while.

He handed over the lenses to Mia and tried to reign it the fuck in. “You seein’ that?”

Mia nodded numbly and let Sophie have a look as well, just to confirm.

“Is she… drunk?” the younger twin whispered, horrified. Her hand dropped to her stomach, rubbing absently as she followed Lori’s wobbling figure down the street into the next house along. She emerged a minute later with a bottle. “Oh, my God.”

Mia's eyes narrowed and as Shane felt a rage inside him, he saw it mirrored in Mia's face and stance on the tree branch. Her hands gripped the limb she perched on with a white-knuckled angry hold. A snarl on her lips as they all watched Lori open the bottle, toss the cap to the ground and chug a good portion of it in seconds. She stumbled to and fro until she reached the porch again, then turned on her children. 

They couldn't hear from this distance, but saw the way Carl held the baby closer to him. How Lori started waving her free hand about. The baby’s red face as she started wailing and crying.

The woman was yelling at them for something. 

Mia was about to explode. The stumbled gait, the raised voice, the drunkenness... Everything reminded her of her mother, and it sent her blood bubbling and her lips peeling back in a feral growl.  _How dare she… How_ dare _this woman call herself a mother?!_ One thing was certain in Mia's mind. She was going to kill the bitch.

"Motherfuck..." Shane mumbled, reaching out to grab Mia's arm before she could land on the fence and do whatever she was going to do. Mia whipped her head around and Shane glared right back, waiting until she calmed down and nodded at him before releasing his hold on her. 

"We got to get her outta there." Sophie's voice was gentle and Shane and Mia both clenched their jaws as they watched Lori stumble into the house. Carl carried the baby inside moments later, the resignation on his face confirming just how much of a regular occurrence it was. 

For the next several hours they barely moved. Simply kept watch and jotted down watch patterns and who carried which visible weapon. Which homes were vacant and which were occupied… how many non-lethal people were there versus threats.

They were beyond exhausted by the end of it, with Sophie almost falling asleep on her tree branch more than once and Mia yawning more often than she’d care to admit. Neither twin even considered leaving until Shane was ready but, when he was, they were both extremely grateful for the reprieve.

The walk back to the Jeep was silent except for their footsteps crunching over twigs and leaves, heavy with the weight of everything they’d seen that day. The Grimes family were at odds, the people of Alexandria were weak, and all any of them wanted to do was get in, grab the baby and go. But they couldn’t. And it killed them.

Once they reached the grove they’d hidden away in, Shane threw Mia the keys and guided Sophie to the rear door with a hand on her lower back. The older twin nodded in understanding and hopped in the front seat, adjusting her cap so the lowering sun wouldn’t be in her eyes. Driving would give her something to focus on, keep her itching hands busy and her mind on task instead of wishing she could drive her blade into Lori’s chest.

She glanced in the rear-view mirror as Shane helped Sophie into the Jeep before joining her on the backseat and wrapping an arm tightly round her. Mia knew what would happen when they got home – Shane’s decision not to drive had proven as much – so put the Jeep into drive and sped back. The sooner they were off the road, the better.

As expected, when they pulled up outside the cabin, Shane climbed out and held out his hands to help Sophie, gripping her waist as she lowered herself to the ground. Mia grabbed their shit from the front passenger seat, then hopped out the Jeep and headed inside without interrupting the pair. The look in Shane’s eyes confirmed her prediction was right, and she was grateful for the time alone it would grant her. She had shit to plan.

The other two stood there for a long moment, just staring at each other, until Shane swept back her hair from Sophie’s face and dipped his head to kiss her, slow and deep. It was more tender than she’d expected, soft and loving instead of the rough power she’d grown used to, and it had her letting out a quiet moan against his lips.

“Tired?” Shane murmured as his hands gripped her hips, pulling her into him. Sophie smiled and let her arms wrap around his neck so her fingers could thread into his hair.

“A little,” she admitted, but Shane understood the silent permission there and didn’t hesitate to reach for her thighs and pull her up against him. She wrapped her legs round his waist and settled into his chest as he walked them towards the house and through to the bedroom, glimpsing Mia and her pile of papers as they went.

When he reached the bed, he lowered her to the floor and slowly started to strip her of her clothes, peeling the layers of fabric off her body as she did the same to him. Their lips met over and over in slow, sensual kisses, coaxing the smoldering heat between them into low burning flames with every touch of their hands, every new item that joined the pile of clothing on the floor, until he finally sat on the edge of the bed and pulled her into his lap.

She sank down onto him effortlessly, one hand cupping his face while the other gripped his shoulder for leverage as she held his gaze to watch his eyes darken with each inch she took inside her. When he bottomed out, he slid his hands up her spine, cradling her back and guiding her lips to his. Their rhythm was slow, steady, no urgency for either one of them to release. Just quiet breaths, small moans, the slick sound of her rising and falling above him as they wordlessly reconnected and held each other steady.

He kissed his way down to her neck, and her head fell back as he sucked over her pulse point and his hands gripped her hips to help her move. She let out a breathless moan, then gently tugged his hair to bring his face back to hers and pressed their foreheads together, lips meeting with each rock of their hips until finally she was gasping and he was groaning into her mouth as the wave crested and rolled over them.

Mia found them an hour later, curled up under the sheets. Sophie was fast asleep and probably had been for a while but, despite his exhausted appearance, Shane’s eyes opened when she quietly closed the door behind her. She grimaced and shot him an apologetic look, but he just extended a hand to coax her forward and rolled over onto his back to face her, bringing Sophie’s sleeping form against his chest.

“What’s goin’ on in that head of yours, Babygirl?” he murmured, voice rough with tiredness.

She didn't answer at first, simply sat down at the edge of the bed, just in reach of Shane's fingertips. Her hands were formed into fists by her thighs, clenching and releasing over and over. Shane couldn't see her face, for the dim moonlight and the way her curls and waves hid her from view. 

"Babygirl?"

She still didn't answer him, just stood and started pacing back and forth at the foot of the bed, socked feet soft and quiet as she moved. 

Shane's eyes caught the pure, animalistic look in Mia's darkened gaze. With some effort, he withdrew from Sophie's sleeping form and stood from the bed, grabbed Mia's bicep, then yanked her out into the hall. The door barely closed before he had her right arm in a hold behind her back and pushed her toward the main room. 

"Sit." He wasn’t asking.

At his order, she sat in the wooden chair by the fire but couldn’t keep still, her knee bouncing like crazy and her grip on her own forearms ready to rip into her own skin. 

Shane waited a moment. Like a naughty child, she needed to be set in the corner and made to calm herself down before she went off like the bomb she was.

When it became clear that wasn’t working, he knelt down and set his hands on her knees.

"Now, Babygirl, you need to calm your ass down, okay? You're gonna wake your sister."

Her knee slowed its jumping at that but didn't stop. Her eyes wouldn't meet his, instead staring at the low fire burning so intently, he was sure the wall behind it would burst into flame. 

He knew the rage she was struggling to bottle up. It matched his own. He’d seen that look on her eyes after seeing Lori drunk off her ass and screaming at those kids, watched her palm draw over the handle of her blade and noted the bloodlust in her eyes. 

"Mia."

Her knee went back to jumping and he scowled. She was usually so obedient in her own way, but this was straight up refusal to anything he was saying or asking.

"Calm down. _Now._ "

"She used to be like that. We were kids and could barely fucking walk. Screaming at us. Stinking of liquor,” she rambled, nails clawing at the inside of her wrists on habit.

"Baby…"

"Started with just the screaming. Then came the hitting. Know what it's like? Being five years old and lying to the doctor that you fell down the steps?" She scoffed out a snarl. "Didn't even have stairs at that house."

She was losing it. He could see it in how her eyes wouldn't focus and her nails were ready to rip into her wrists, making him absently wonder if she’d ever cut as a teen from the practiced way she was trying it. 

"Mia."

She didn’t respond.

Instead, her body flew upwards and he stood as abruptly as she did, the chair beneath her barely settling back on itself instead of toppling over. She started to pace, stalking from one side of the room to the other and back again.

Her feet scattered papers on the ground, more than were there when he came inside with Sophie earlier. Notes were scribbled with rough sketches of the people in the camp, tracking obvious weaknesses and plotting ways they could infiltrate without making a sound. She'd been busy making plans like a team of marines would for an op. She was acting like a crazed soldier on a suicide mission, and whatever this was? It wasn’t her.

"Mia..."

She barely flickered her eyes to him. 

He moved fast, walking back to the hall and ripping his belt from the floor where it had landed earlier before grabbing her by the elbows and throwing her to the ground with a grunt. She struggled but not anywhere near the amount if she truly meant it.

His belt locked her wrists together in seconds and his naked body crowded down on hers as he breathed slow and deep, waiting for her to catch on and breath with him. To climb down from the height of rage she was in. 

Long moments passed of her heavy breathing as she gradually managed to slow her breaths and her heart rate calmed. He waited until finally, _finally_ , she went lax under him, then moved off her and tugged her up to sit between his thighs. He held her back against his chest as she stared at the papers strewn over the floor, unable to look away.

"You with me?"

She hesitated. "Yeah..."

He reached up to grab her throat, tipping her head back so she had no choice but to look at the ceiling instead of the papers. She let out a frustrated breath and closed her eyes, knowing she’d been caught out. Shane watched her closely, then waited until her hands unclenched from their fists and she relaxed again before asking again.

“Are you with me?”

She nodded best she could in his hold. “I’m here.”

He moved her hand from her neck but she kept her head tipped back against his shoulder anyway and groaned weakly when he closed his hands over hers.

“You gonna keep it together or do I need to keep these wrists tied?” he murmured lowly.

“Tied,” she mumbled. “I can’t- this is too-”

“Breathe.” He carefully undid the belt despite her request and replaced it with his fingers, feeling her pulse thump through her skin. Until her heart-rate slowed, there was no way she’d be able to talk about things rationally and the loss of the belt would force her to focus on him instead. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not.”

“It will be,” he promised. “But only if you calm down and stop this. You think I don’t get it? You think I didn’t feel that rage when I saw her treat my kid like shit?”

Mia swallowed hard. “That’s not…”

“I wanted to slaughter every single one of them in there,” he told her, voice dark. “I wanted to rip her limb from limb, tear her apart, watch her burn… but my little girl comes first. You hear me, Mia? _She_ is the reason we’re doin’ this shit. Not them.”

“ _They_ are the reason you don’t have her in the first place,” she ground out.

“And that’s why we can’t let them distract us,” he replied. “Shit, that’s what kept me on that fuckin’ branch. We cannot go in guns blazin’. Not this time.”

“I want… I want to…” She couldn’t even speak, couldn’t form the words to explain it. But she didn’t need to.

“So do I,” he whispered. “But we can’t. They can’t trace this back to us, or we’ll lose everythin’. We gotta be careful. And if you ain’t gonna be able to do that, if you ain’t gonna stay calm…”

“I will,” she swore. “I promise.”

“Good.” He let go of her wrists slowly and waited to see if she’d tense again. She didn’t. “C’mon. Long day tomorrow.”

He got to his feet and offered her a hand up, then guided her back to the bedroom and stripped her down before climbing back into bed beside Sophie and holding both twins tight to his chest. His rock and his fire, the angel and devil either side of him as always.

The next couple of days followed the same pattern, both inside and outside Alexandria’s walls. They’d leave at first light, picking a different route each time, then trek to their tree and watch over the town until the sun threatened to set and they had to leave again. Each time they got back to the cabin, Mia would pour over the day’s findings while Shane sought thecomfort only Sophie was capable of giving. He needed her softness, her stability, her _light_ more than ever, and she was desperate for the connection that bridged the gap her lie by omission had created without him even knowing.

But then, on the fourth day, everything changed.

The rumbling of vehicles alerted them first. And not just a couple of cars either. A huge army-looking truck pulled up right to the front gates with several other trucks right behind it, big enough to carry at least thirty people.

The girls froze up, too afraid to move and risk giving away their position, and Shane was quick to place a reassuring hand on their legs to calm them. From their current angle, not even the binoculars would have helped them see who, exactly, was in the trucks, but the sight of Rick hurrying out of his house and all but running towards the main gate at the sound of metallic banging was enough for them to realize they weren’t friendly.

“Little Pig, Little Pig! Let. Me. In!”

Shane leaned forward until he could make out the figure at the gates. It was a dark-haired man in a leather jacket, holding a baseball bat over his shoulder with what looked like barbed wire wrapped around the end. But it was the smile on his face as he spoke to someone Shane didn’t recognize on the other side of the gate that was the most unsettling sight.

“Oh, you better be joking! Negan… Lucille… I know I had to make a pretty strong first impression.”

The wrecked look on Rick’s face told Shane all he needed to know.

The fact he then slid open the gates to let the man in…

He signaled for the girls to stay quiet and cursed under his breath at the scared expressions on both their faces. Even Mia couldn’t hide hers. He nodded, silently giving them permission to move closer, then picked up the binoculars and followed the newcomer’s every move. Watched him beat a walker’s skull in with a single swing of his bat then strut right on in, that grin on his face all the while.

“Shane…”

He grimaced at the fear in Sophie’s voice. Quiet as she was, he was grateful none of Negan’s people were outside the compound anymore, having headed inside with their leader. His instincts told him drawing their attention would be catastrophic.

“S’alright, Darlin’,” he whispered. “Just stay still, okay?”

He couldn’t hear what was being said from so far away, but he didn’t need to. It was clear this _Negan_ completely and utterly dominated Rick and every single person in Alexandria. He walked around like he owned the place - he obviously _did_ \- and Rick let him. Didn’t even fucking fight as Negan’s people started ransacking the houses.

Rick was a broken man, with a broken woman, but his boy was no longer weak. Shane felt a surge of pride at the sight of Carl standing up to Negan by refusing to let him in the house, even if all it earned him was a sharp glare from Rick in response and a laugh from a tyrant. _Someone_ was looking after the baby while Shane couldn’t, even though her mother seemed incapable of even trying.

Lori hadn’t even attempted to stop Negan, face resigned, hands shaking like she was itching for another drink. Shane wasn’t sure who was more pathetic – her, or her husband. And it fucking infuriated him as much as it filled him with a sadistic sense of justice, to see them both so defeated and downtrodden in their own ‘safe-zone’. They’d given up. Rolled over. She’d once accused him of being wrong, when he’d told her Rick was not build for this world. But he’d been right the whole fucking time.

Judging by the absence of some key group members, it seemed that maybe they weren’t the only ones who’d failed to keep their shit in check. Or maybe the others had come to their senses and jumped ship while they could. He didn’t fucking care. Fewer obstacles to get through.

Negan stayed until every house had been emptied of its contents. Food, mattresses, valuables, furniture… All of it, loaded into the trucks along with his people while Rick carried around Negan’s baseball bat with a nauseous expression, unable to quite look at the barbed wire. If Shane had it in him to give a shit, he’d wonder why. _If._

 

It was almost dark by the time the trucks left, but Shane signaled for the girls to stay put just a little longer. Roaming walkers were less of a threat than Negan clearly was, and he wasn’t going to risk their safety, not after that.

When he thought enough time had passed, he climbed down from the tree and reached up to help Mia, then Sophie, get their feet on solid ground. Mia was less steady than her younger sister for once, clearly shaken by the presence of such a dominating force so close to their vulnerable hiding spot, but beneath that? Shane saw the molten rage that burned in her eyes.

He kept his eyes wide open on the walk back to the Jeep, but it seemed even the wild was too afraid to move after Negan had steamrolled his way in. They made it back in record time, all three of them eager to leave, and he quickly hopped into the driver’s seat as the twins settled in their usual spots before getting the Hell out of there.

“They said they won’t be back for a week,” he broke the silence with as he finally cut the engine, safely back at the cabin. “Tomorrow won’t be like this.”

Mia nodded and climbed out the vehicle, but Sophie just stared out the window, unaware he’d even said anything.

“Darlin’?”

He reached over and covered her hands with his, where they rested over her stomach. She startled, then turned to stare at him with wide eyes before letting out a shaky breath and laughing.

“Shit, sorry,” she muttered, then climbed out the Jeep to head in after her sister.

Shane frowned, following them inside before asking, “You alright?”

Sophie smiled brightly and moved to stand in front of him, resting her hands on his chest. “Yeah. Sorry, just caught up in thought.”

He accepted the kiss she pressed to his lips, but when she turned and started to walk away, his brow furrowed even more. “What about?”

She hesitated.

“Sophie.”

“Um…” Her voice became quieter and she looked to Mia for support, who simply nodded reassuringly. “I think we need to get in there. Observing from the outside won’t be enough if we’re gonna do this right.”

Shane was about to vehemently protest, but as he opened his mouth, Mia's voice rang out first. 

"I agree. We need to get in, scope out the inside and make a plan. Quickly." Her eyes betrayed her barely controlled rage, but under that… she wanted to get his baby out of there. Both of them did.

Not to benefit them, but to help _him._ They needed to save his baby girl from that shit hole just as badly as he did. Electricity and running water meant nothing if you were constantly giving everything away to a bigger player, and with Lori there… It was Hell, dressed like Heaven.

That didn’t stop him fuming, though. Alexandria was the one place on the planet he couldn’t follow them to, the _only_ place he wouldn’t be able to get to them, to save them if things went south. _How the fuck had it come to that?_ How the Hell was he supposed to just let them-

"Shane..." Sophie's hand on his arm stopped his mind from spiralling. He was still seething, still pissed at the hand that had been dealt to them, but he’d promised himself he’d never lose himself to his anger around either one of them, not after last time, and it was an oath he was determined to keep.

"Shane, it's a good idea." Mia knelt on the edge of the couch and reached over to hold onto his other arm. A tether that made it easier to unclench his teeth and take a steady breath, keeping his demons in check. 

He turned to sit heavily on the middle of the couch, tugging Sophie into his lap while Mia curled into his side and tangled her legs with Sophie's. His left hand rested against Sophie's lower back and the other tangled gently in Mia's short locks of hair to bring her close enough for him to gently kiss her temple.

A million and one thoughts raced through his mind. His demon, his alpha male, whatever the fuck it was inside him wanted revenge, it wanted blood, but above all it wanted to _protect,_ and yet...

They were right. He had to let them go into that camp. It was the only way to get inside without causing a big problem by him being less dead than Rick thought. They could get in, act scared, get the necessary information and get out. All without breaking cover.

He leaned his head back to the couch and closed his eyes, holding them both closer to him as he breathed slowly and thought everything through. They let him, and he was so thankful for that. They somehow always knew when he needed to talk and when he needed to rage, without him having to say a thing.

Several long moments passed. Hell, it could have been an hour, his sense of time was so off from his tiredness. 

“We’ll do one last scout out tomorrow,” he eventually relented. “No fuckin’ surprises, alright?”

Sophie lifted her head from his chest and nodded, meeting his gaze with her own reassuring one. “You can trust us.”

And fuck, did he know that like he knew his own name. But trusting them wouldn’t be enough this time – he had to know every base was covered with no stone left unturned. They would never be the problem. Rick and the other Alexandrians? Negan and his brutes? They were the ones who could ruin it all.

He just had to make sure they wouldn’t get the chance.

So, when they arrived at Alexandria the next day for their final scouting mission, he plotted and planned and marked out every possible escape route he could, made the girls memorize them and recite them over and over again just to be sure. No matter where they were in the safe-zone, they’d be able to get out. And he’d be there, waiting to help them as soon as they were on the other side of those walls.

Rick had sent a group of people out around midday, presumably to scavenge for Negan, and the dip in the number of men inside the walls had Shane feeling a little less uneasy. They’d be gone for a few days at least and the lower the number of people in there was, the easier it would be for the girls to not only infiltrate it, but then stay alive once inside. They just had to play their cards right.

The girls knew it too, and proved as much when they started discussing their plans once back in the cabin that night.

“They’re terrified of Negan, even when he’s not there.”

“We can use that,” Mia replied. “Play on their fear, use it to get in.”

Sophie nodded in agreement from her place on the couch as Shane paced behind her. “They think we’re another victim…”

“… they let us through those gates to save us,” Mia finished for her sister, twirling her blade in her hands. “We just gotta make it believable.”

“Then we tell the truth.”

Shane stopped his pacing to look at Sophie and frowned at the expression on her face. She looked vulnerable, uncertain, and it took him a moment to realize why. “No.”

“Shane, it’s our best shot,” she murmured quietly as she met Mia’s gaze. “We’ve been in a similar position to them before. We tell our story, but make out Negan’s people did it.”

“You’re not reliving that,” Shane ground out. “No fuckin’ way.”

“If it gets your daughter out of there, it’ll be worth it,” Mia told him, and at that moment, he realized he was outnumbered two to one with no hope in Hell of changing their minds.

“I can’t ask you do to this.”

“You’re not,” Sophie pointed out. She got up off the couch and moved to stand in front of him, placing both hands on his chest as she met his gaze. “This isn’t about us, or you. It’s about _her._ ”

Mia stood to her full height, tossing the navy blue ball cap to the couch as she reached her sister. Her arms dropped over Sophie's shoulders and she met Shane’s gaze, her cheek resting sweetly against Sophie's. "We're doing this because we love you, Shane."

“I-”

Sophie shushed him as Mia continued speaking, "Shane, we _love_ you. We're gonna get your daughter back, if it's the last fuckin’ thing we do."

All he could do was stare at them. Sophie's soft sweet face… Mia's strong set jaw… The way Mia's arms were slung over Sophie's shoulders in such an older sibling move as Sophie's hands pressed gentle and almost coaxing at his chest… they molded to every part of him in every way imaginable. 

His girls. _His._

It was strange to think that, just a year ago, he'd have been fine by himself. Fed up with women and love and people in general.

Now, he had the loves of his life right in front of him. Had somehow found them, nursed them back to health… and somewhere along the way between discovering that fire inside and wanting them to shine bright like the suns they were, he’d fallen for them. Really and truly. He’d never thought he'd have two women on his arm. Not like this. These girls weren't trophies to show off, they were warriors, and he had to respect that.

So, he reached out, one hand on each of their hips, and pulled them in, lips touching gently to Sophie's temple before latching onto Mia's mouth. His fingers held Sophie's hip tight in his bruising grip, refusing to leave her out.

Mia moaned against his lips and Sophie slipped out from under her sister’s arms, moving round unbutton Shane’s shirt before pulling the fabric from his body and trailing kisses along his shoulder blades. He reached behind him to grab her hip again, determined not to let her go anywhere, and threaded his other hand into Mia’s hair. He tugged gently, making her arch into him, then groaned at the feel of Sophie’s hands undoing his belt from behind.

“Bedroom,” she whispered.

He squeezed her hip tight, showing he understood, then hauled Mia up against him and teased her bottom lip with his teeth when she wrapped her legs around him in response, agile as ever. They made it halfway down the hall before he couldn’t take it anymore and shoved Mia against the wall and pinned her wrists above her head with one hand. Sophie moved behind him and raked her nails down his back, just on the good edge of pain, and it had his hips grinding into Mia’s to get some relief.

“Shane, c’mon,” Mia mumbled against his lips. “Six feet that way and you can have us both.”

He hissed in an unsteady breath and forced his feet to keep going, all but stumbling towards the bedroom and thanking fuck Sophie had managed to open the door for them before they got there. He let Mia drop to sit on the edge of the bed and reached for her twin, lifting her tank top over her head before capturing her lips with hers.

Sophie pushed herself up on her toes and reached behind herself to unhook her bra so her bare breasts could press against his chest. The friction made her sensitive nipples pebble, and Shane couldn’t help but tease one with his thumb just to make her whine impatiently. His other hand threaded itself into Mia’s hair as she kissed and sucked her way along his hipbone before unzipping his pants to tug them to the ground.

“Fuck,” he grunted, unsure whose hand started to palm his already hard length but not giving a shit either. It had been a while since he’d had both of them at the same time like this, and he hadn’t realized how much he craved the two of them again until then. It made him ravenous.

Sophie leaned up to kiss over his jaw and chin, nipping her small teeth against the bone there to make him growl and tighten his hand reflexively in Mia's hair. The older twin hissed out and bit at his hipbone before soothing the sting with her tongue as Sophie's hand gripped tighter over his length.  

As Shane latched onto Sophie's lips, Mia kept moving, lips traveling over his hips to his pubic bone until finally, _finally_ , her tongue was on him. He groaned into Sophie's mouth like a man starved, releasing Mia's hair to grab Sophie's hips as her twin’s mouth sunk onto him.

His hips gave small bucks to Mia's hard sucking mouth, and when she hollowed out her cheeks, he groaned again. She knew how to work him over without even having to try. He felt Sophie's lips quirk into a smile at the sound and smirked back at her, his grip tight on her hip as one hand travelled into her shorts and between her thighs.

"Fuck, Sweetheart," he sighed as he slicked his fingertips in the wetness he found there, soaking her panties with warm heat. "S'fuckin wet."

His fingers dove into her quickly while Mia dropped to her knees between him and the bed, sucking harder and harder as her hands gripped onto his thighs for balance.

With Mia blowing him, he was free to focus on Sophie, threading the fingers of his other hand into her hair and making her arch her neck. His fingers worked her slow inside her shorts and he couldn’t help but tease her bottom lip with his teeth as she whimpered and bucked her hips into his touch, pleading for more. He fucking loved playing with her, with both of them.

“Shane,” she begged, bracing herself against his chest. She was still so sensitive that even the rough slide of his palm over her clit was enough to make her moan, and when he started to suck and bite marked along the column of her throat her knees threatened to buckle.  _“Shane.”_

He smirked against her lips, then withdrew his fingers from her shorts and brought them up to his mouth to taste her. _Fucking delicious._ “Darlin’, you have no idea how good that is.”

Sophie pulled him in for a deep kiss, tongue sliding across his for a moment before he tugged on her hair to arch her back again. She whined in frustration, but Mia gave him a taste of his own medicine by swallowing around his cock just once before pulling back and he let out a groan in response.

He reached out for her and pulled her to standing before claiming her lips with his own, still teasing Sophie with his hand in her hair to hold her back. Mia bit at his bottom lip and let her nails scrape down his bicep as he tugged at her waist, the pain just heightening the pleasure of Sophie’s fingers wrapping round his slick length again.

“Gonna be the death of me,” he growled, then pushed both twins onto the bed.

It was a hard enough push that they both were sent to the middle of the bed, falling into a tangle of limbs and hair before they righted themselves and rolled onto their backs to face him. Shane watched Mia sit up and tug off her shirt, breasts begging to be released from the confinement as Sophie shimmied out of her shorts and panties. Both of them were just as eager and hungry as he was.

He bit his lip and looked at them for a moment, taking in the way their legs were toned and strong now, flat but soft stomachs tensing as his eyes roamed over their forms. They'd come so far in such a short time. Healthier than ever. Beautiful. Sexy as hell, too.

He growled and palmed his length to ease some of its pounding of blood, willing himself to make it last for them. To make it good. Mia bit her lip and slowly unbuttoned her shorts, lifting her hips to push the fabric down and, with a kick out, they were thrown across the room. She splayed her legs some and he groaned – she was just as soaking wet as her twin. 

Sophie pushed herself up on her knees and both of them moved from the middle of the bed to make room for him.

Mia patted the sheets between them. "C’mere, handsome."

How could he say no to that?

He crawled onto the mattress and threw himself onto his back before tugging Sophie to straddle him, her wet heat slick against him as she moved. She placed her hands on his chest and rocked back and forth, sliding down the length of him over and over and teasing him with her entrance before pulling back again.

“Darlin’…”

“Mmm?” She smiled sweetly down at him, then tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, the picture of innocence.

Shane shook his head and stared at her, taking in every curve and line above him. But it was her face he adored most, those expressive green eyes and soft lips, the way he could tell what she was feeling from those alone… He reached up to cup her cheek. “C’mere, beautiful.”

She folded herself over him, bracing her weight on her forearms, then kissed him slowly, sensually, as she rolled her hips just enough to let his blunt head push against her. She was so wet, he slid in with ease, stretching her around him as her walls fluttered and welcomed him inside. She moaned when he bottomed out, then stretched out her spine to push back onto him just a little more, craving that last inch.

“My sweet girl,” he whispered as he pushed her hair back from her face so he could look at her properly. He thrusted his hips up slightly to watch her eyes fall shut, then pulled her down to kiss her again before gripping her waist and moving beneath her. She whimpered at the rhythm he set, unable to do anything except take it as he held her still above him, and felt herself start tightening around him faster than she was prepared for.

“ _Oh…_ ” she moaned, sliding her fingers under his head to tug at his hair. Shane parted her lips with his and curled his tongue around hers as he brought one hand between them to tease her clit. The past week, it hadn’t taken much to tip her over the edge – he fucking _loved_ it – and then was no exception.

It only took a few more thrusts and a couple tight circles over her slick flesh before her mouth fell open in a silent scream and she squeezed his length so hard he couldn’t move. Her legs shook so much they could barely hold her weight and he couldn’t stop himself smiling at the blissful expression on her face - one that _he’d_ put there. She panted breathlessly as she pressed her forehead to his, then squealed when he rolled them over and pulled out from her in the same moment, way too sensitive for even the gentlest of movements.

“Stay there,” he murmured into a kiss. “I’m not done with you yet.”

Sophie nodded weakly, too overwhelmed to even speak, then pushed herself back against the pillows as Shane looked round to find Mia on her knees behind him, eager for her turn.

“Good girl,” he praised, then reached out to pull her in for a rough kiss before twisting her round on her hands and knees.

" _Shane…_ " Mia groaned with a pout, bending her back downwards as she spread her legs and tossed her short hair over her shoulder to give him a smoldering look. 

He grinned and slapped a hand over her ass cheek, squeezing it tightly. She gasped, but her eyes only darkened as she arched further, pressing back against his hips. It was all a coy act and they both knew it. She pushed at his buttons, he’d pull back to make her listen. It was never-ending tug of war, a push and pull between them both every second they were together. She craved his power, and he gladly gave it.

"What, Babygirl? What’chu want, huh?" He grabbed both sides of her hips and pulled, sliding the length of him against her folds. Teasing.

She smiled over her shoulder as he leaned forward and kissed over her upper back. "Want you, Shane."

"Good answer." He smirked darkly against her skin, then fisted his hand in her hair to yank her up. She may have been on her knees, but a lot of her weight was held by his fist in her hair and she squirmed her back and hips, barely able to keep the pull off her scalp.

His other hand stroked over her breasts, first flicking over one nipple then the other. He pinched at the hardened nubs and grinned at the sharp gasps from her mouth, then made his way over her toned stomach and down between her thighs.

"Damn, girl..." he grunted, quickly pressing his middle finger to her clit and rolling furiously. Mia started to helplessly whimper and squirm against him. It was too much, too quick, but Shane knew she was close.

He stopped.

"Fuc- _Shane!"_ She reached up to tug on his wrist in her hair, but he swatted her hands away so she reached down to her clit instead, desperate to finish.

He yanked her head back sharply and she froze.

"Ah-ah-ah, you know better than that, baby." He looked over to Sophie, who was still blissed out but watching through hooded eyes. "Sweet girl, your sister's being a brat. Hand me my belt?"

Sophie laughed softly and lazily reached to the floor, picking up the black leather before tossing it to Shane's waiting hand. He winked at her, then smiled when she settled back against the mattress, thighs rubbing together in a way that told him she was almost ready to go again. He leaned in until his lips were against Mia’s neck, hand tight and brutal in its tugs on her scalp. Always toying the line between pleasure and pain.

"Behave."

Mia whimpered but held herself still as Shane pulled her wrists in front of her and wrapped the belt over her skin from wrist to elbow, coiling the leather around itself before cinching it a bit tighter than usual. 

With a push to her shoulder, Mia fell face down onto the mattress again. Her wrists were bound so tightly together she couldn't bend her arms too well, so she stretched them between her spread knees, weight resting on her shoulders and neck. A shudder ran through her as Shane palmed his cock and pressed it to her soaking entrance.

Shane bit his bottom lip and groaned deeply as he sank into her tight depths. He marvelled at how she stretched around him, taking all she could inside, loved the way she bit into the sheets and how her shoulders trembled, just as overwhelmed as he was.

She was already close to the peak, same way she always was when he bound her with his belt. He moved quickly, pushing her even closer as sweat dripped from his scalp to his neck and down his skin with the effort. He leaned forward a bit, one hand braced by her chest for balance as he panted above her frame and pulled her back to meet every thrust.

The moment he felt her start to tighten around him, he was gone, roaring out his release as Mia rocked beneath him as much as she could to prolong it. Her entire body trembled with the force of it, little pathetic whimpers escaping her lips every time he moved until he finally relented.

He grinned down at her sweat soaked back, then leaned down to kiss her neck. "Good girl."

Sex was never better than when he had her bound, except maybe when he spanked her too, and Mia basked in it just a little longer until Shane withdrew with a soft groan and patted her hip. The simple touch served to roll her onto her side as she continued to pant heavily, eyes half closed and a smile on her lips.

He reached over to touch the belt, ready to untie her, but she shook her head and pulled her arms away.

“Mia?”

She rolled onto her back beneath him to look into his eyes. “The bruises will make them believe it.”

He stilled at that. He’d almost forgotten what he’d agreed to let them do.

Mia saw his hesitance and pushed herself up to kiss him, reassuring him it was okay. “You know I like it like this.”

Shane trailed his fingers along her leather-bound forearms as he took in the relaxed expression on her face. He groaned quietly, then captured her mouth in a gentle kiss that was such a contrast to their roughness from before that it made Mia shudder. She laid flat on her back again and stared up at him, trust radiating from her eyes to his. She was telling the truth. She wanted it.

“She’s right.”

Shane twisted round to find Sophie standing next to the bed, hands playing with the second belt he usually kept in the bedroom as a backup in case his pants were discarded in the main room. His eyes widened at the sight of her holding it – that had always been a hard limit for her before.

“Darlin’…” He moved to sit in front of her, one hand on Mia’s thigh while the other grazed Sophie’s hip. The younger twin smiled down at him, but he could see the uncertainty she tried to hide. “You don’t…”

“Yeah, I do,” she whispered. She took a steadying breath, then offered him the belt to take. “Just… not my ankles?”

“Never,” he swore. That was one thing he would never even dream of doing to either one of them. “Remember your colors?”

She laughed under her breath and reached up with her free hand to card her fingers through her hair. “We’re past them now, don’t you think?”

“This is different,” he reminded her. “I _know_ this isn’t what you-”

“Shane, she’s good,” Mia assured him as she got up on her knees behind him and pressed a kiss to his shoulder blade. “I’m here. Just like the first time.”

He watched Sophie smile gratefully at her sister, then waited until her gaze was back on his before slowly taking the belt from her, giving her time to back out. She seemed nervous, but willing, and he couldn’t bring himself to reject her, not when he knew what she was saying was true.

“Eyes on me, yeah?” he murmured, taking her hands and bringing them together in front of her.

She swallowed thickly, then nodded. “Okay.”

“I gotcha,” he promised as he slowly wrapped the belt around her wrists. She shuddered, but he could tell it was from his words more than fear. “Gonna make it so good for ya, Darlin’, I promise.”

Sophie bit down on her bottom lip and tried to resist the temptation to watch his hands as they secured the belt. She could tell it wasn’t as tight as it could have been, but she wouldn’t be able to move them either if she tried. The thought made her breathing hitch, but his eyes were so warm and kind that she couldn’t bring herself to move away.

“There you go.” He pressed his lips to her palms, then guided her wrists up over his head until her arms were circling his neck and tugged at her hips. “C’mere, sweetheart.”

She settled into his lap and moaned softly as he kissed her, then felt her eyes widen at the realization she had enough freedom to slide her fingers into his hair if she rotated her wrists just right. The belt restricted her, but didn’t completely immobilize her.

“Good, right?” Mia encouraged from behind them, running her fingertips over her sister’s knuckles in a silent promise not to move too far away.

“Different,” Sophie agreed as Shane’s lips traceD a path along her jawline and to the sensitive spot below her ear.

“Gonna make you come so hard,” he breathed against her skin, sucking a purple mark there as his hands roamed up her sides to cup her breasts. “Such a sweet girl for me, ain’t ya?”

She was too overwhelmed too answer, barely even able to keep her eyes open as his thumbs grazed over her nipples, teasing them into tight buds before tugging lightly. Her chest jolted forwards and she inhaled sharply, only to let the breath out as a whine when his tongue replaced one of his thumbs and his free hand threaded itself into her hair.

“That’s it,” he murmured, kissing his way across to her other breast. “Let me hear ya.”

Her hips jerked forward and rubbed over his hardening length as he palmed her ass, and another moan escaped her when he lightly spanked the spot he’d just been squeezing. With her wrists bound, all her focus was on her own body, making every sensation heightened, every nerve more aware, and the more he touched her, the less she was even conscious of the fact she was tied up.

_“Shane…”_

He smirked against her neck, then lifted his head to catch her gaze. “Yes, sweetheart?”

“I need-” Her hips rolled over his, desperate for _something._ “I need-”

His lips latched onto hers as he carefully stood up and held her weight before turning them both to lay her down on the bed, almost rolling his body into hers as he moved to cover her. Her fingers clutched at his hair as she arched up into him, only for Shane to reach up and push her wrists up over her head instead. She tensed slightly when he pinned them to the mattress, then shuddered at the feel of Mia’s gentle fingers threading through hers.

“Gonna keep ‘em there for me?” Shane squeezed her wrists gently. “Or dya need-”

“I’m good,” she croaked, then whimpered as he started to slowly slide his hands back down her arms. She clutched at Mia’s fingers, needing something to ground her.

“Just wait,” Mia whispered, stroking some of Sophie’s hair back from her forehead as Shane kissed his way down the younger twin’s body. “It gets better.”

Sophie cried out as Shane pushed her thighs up and out, spreading her open for him, then looked down to see him gazing up at her, eyes dark and wanton. He smirked, then hooked one arm under her thigh and around her hip so his fingers could tease her clit before lowering his head and flattening his tongue against her folds.

“ _Fuck!_ ” Sophie’s back arched violently, but Mia tugged against the belt so she couldn’t move and the restraint pulled at her wrists perfectly. It was too much yet too little all at once, to not be able to reach for him, but Shane knew her body better than she did and didn’t need any guidance.

His tongue swirled over her clit, then flicked out rapidly to make her thighs shake before teasing at her entrance as his fingers took its place, over and over again in a circuit that kept her at the edge. Each time she was almost there, he’d stop her closing her legs and change it up again, never giving her a break or easing up on her, and it left her panting and writhing against the mattress, unsure which way was up and which sensation was coming from where.

When she was close to crying from the constant build up, he finally relented, pushing himself higher up her body as his fingers replaced his mouth, lightly teasing her slick flesh. He kissed her roughly, letting her get a taste of herself, then laughed under his breath as her thighs clamped round his arm, unsure whether to keep him away or hold him still.

“I’ll getcha there,” he murmured against her lips. “I promised.”

“Please,” she begged, pulling at the restraint and hissing at the burn. “ _Please._ ”

“Hmm…” Shane smiled at her, then glanced over to Mia, who was staring at him hungrily. “I dunno, Darlin’, I think your sister deserves a reward for making sure you behave…”

Sophie whimpered as his fingers slid inside her, then heard Mia echo it with one of her own as he spread her legs and started teasing her clit with his other hand.

“What dya think?” he breathed, kissing his way along to suck another mark onto her neck. “Think you can hold on and be patient for me, Sweetheart?”

Sophie was so desperate, she could only nod in agreement and fist her hands into the sheets as Shane sat back on his heels, fingers still curving up against her g-spot, and reached for her sister with his other hand.

“Get your ass up here,” he growled, tugging at Mia’s bound wrists to haul her upright. She moaned as he pulled her into his lap and kissed her hungrily, then hooked her arms over his head for support. He reached down between them and hissed in a breath when he guided his length inside her, amazed at how easily she took him in.

Mia's hands were so tightly bound, she couldn't grab onto him like she wanted. She had to rely solely on Shane to hold her up and keep her from falling as her head rolled back and her back arched, trusting his strength. 

His hand kept moving on Sophie, keeping her on the edge while his powerful thighs moved Mia on his lap and bent knees. Her own legs pushed and pulled to keep up with the rough rhythm he was setting, and she pressed her upper arms into his shoulders for more leverage. 

" _Shaaane_ …" Mia's long moaning whimper had his lips finding the cord of her throat and his teeth biting marks all over her flesh.

"C’mon, girl, c’mon," he grunted, using the hand that's not on Sophie to grip Mia's hip tightly as he plowed into her harder than ever.

Her channel _tightened_ around him, slick and molten heat engulfing him so completely, it was a wonder how it was even possible. But they both did. Every fucking time. Always tight like vices, yet somehow ready to take him in, take every inch they could and even that last bit they sometimes couldn't.

He hit all the right places inside her, could feel when he roughly bumped against her cervix the way she liked because she jumped up or whimpered out a little mewl. God, she was like a feral cat in heat when she rode him, especially like this.

She was so close. He could feel it in the way she tightened around him, how her hips stuttered in their movements and her thighs were tense and trembling. A couple more thrusts and she was throwing her head back with a low moan as it finally hit, her entire body moving with his as it flowed over her. 

He forced himself to hold back, to not follow her over. He wouldn’t have another one in him after that and Mia had had her turn already – his fingers were still toying with Sophie, slowed but never stopping even as Mia finally stilled against him. Her entire body relied on his strength alone to hold her up as she hung off him like a rag doll, trembling and panting, skin slick with sweat.

“That better, baby?” he murmured in her ear. Mia nodded weakly, forehead dropping to his, then groaned lowly as he pushed forward so she was on her back with him on top of her. He reached up with both hands to quickly unbind her wrists and massaged the almost-raw skin as he carefully pulled out from her, instantly missing the tight heat. Their lips met in a lazy kiss while his fingers soothed the burn from the rope, but then Mia pulled her arms out of his hold and glanced at Sophie, who was shivering on the bed and struggling not to move.

“She needs you,” she whispered, too quiet for her sister to hear. Shane hesitated, clearly torn between easing the ache in Mia’s wrists and putting Sophie out of her misery, but Mia pushed at his chest and shot him a pointed look. “Shane.”

Sophie’s chest was heaving and her fingers kept clenching the sheet as her hips twitched against the mattress, desperate for relief. But it was the expression on her face that had Shane kissing Mia’s forehead and quickly shifting to the younger twin’s side. It was just like when he’d had her gushing over his hand - she was drifting into that grey area between subspace and semi-consciousness that would lead somewhere dangerous if he let it.

“Sophie,” he murmured, pushing her hair back from her face with one hand while sliding the other up her arm.

She whimpered at the sound of her name, then groaned when his fingers tangled with hers, prizing them away from the bedsheets. “Shane?”

“M’here,” he promised, smiling down at her as her eyes fluttered open. “Hi, Sweetheart.”

She arched up to kiss him and he didn’t hesitate to shift above her, holding his weight up on his forearms as she wrapped her legs around him. She was starving for him, almost ravenous, messy and unrefined as she did anything she could to get closer. It was obvious to him that she was overwhelmed by the push pull of being on the edge for so long, too sweet, too loving to fully enjoy the darker aspects Mia craved. Having her wrists bound had threatened to cross the line, but after so long being like that she was reaching her limit and he knew it, even if she didn’t.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he whispered softly, squeezing her fingers to assure her he wasn’t letting go. “It’s okay, Darlin’. I gotcha.”

His length brushed over her folds as he rolled his hips into hers, but the hiss she let out made him pull back instantly.

“Too sensitive?” he worried.

She shook her head vehemently, cheeks flushed and eyes watery. “N-No, s’just a lot.”

“I know, baby,” he breathed, lips meeting hers in a gentle kiss. “But I promised, didn’t I? I promised I’d make it good for you.”

“Please?” _God, she was so fucking sweet, so soft…_ she was even stronger than she gave herself credit for. Lying like that, tied up and pushing herself past her comfort zone, was another way of her loving him and he had no idea what he’d done to deserve it – or Mia. He may physically have had the control, but they’d always have it mentally. He’d never deny them a goddamn thing, and this was no exception.

The next rock of his hips had his blunt head pushing against her entrance and he felt her spasm around it, like her body couldn’t work out whether it wanted to let him in or keep him out. He teased her mouth open with his tongue and kissed her deeply, drawing her focus to his lips as he slowly pushed in.

“Fuck,” he grunted as her walls clenched around him, this time accepting his body within them. Sophie whined, then pulled him in with her legs until their hips were flush and his pubic bone pushed against her clit.

The move was so sudden, he barely caught himself before crushing her, but he quickly recovered, circling his hips to grind against her clit even more. Her head fell back against the mattress, eyes falling shut against the sensation, and he quickly cupped her cheek in his hand to bring her back to attention.

“Hey, look at me,” he murmured. “Need t’see ya.”

Her eyes snapped open and fixed on his, then widened as he slowly pulled back before thrusting forward again, his thick length dragging against her sensitive walls in a way that had them both moaning.

“Shit, that’s fuckin’ tight… you feel that, Darlin’? How good that is?”

Sophie nodded, lips parted and chest heaving at the sensation. He smiled down at her, feeling a surge of pride as she rolled her hips up to meet his next thrust and tipped her head back slightly without breaking eye contact. The hand not holding hers slipped down to cover her throat and his fingers teased over her thudding pulse.

“ _Oh…”_

He leaned down to kiss her and started to rock his hips, slow but deep enough to hit every sensitive spot as she mewled beneath him. It wasn’t enough to get her to the peak yet, but the build back up was steady and he knew it would hit her hard when she was ready to let go. Her brain was in overdrive, struggling to process everything, but he knew how to get it to switch off, how to get her to just _feel_.

“Love you like this,” he whispered. He knew Mia was hovering nearby, keeping her distance and ready to step in if needed, but his words were for Sophie’s ears only, giving her what she needed. “So fuckin’ perfect… feels so good, baby, you have no idea… no fuckin’ clue… you’re everythin’ to me, you know that?”

Sophie gasped, wrists bucking beneath his hand as she arched off the mattress.

“Yeah, you know, don’cha? Do anythin’ for you two…” His hips picked up their rhythm, almost pounding into the mattress as he squeezed her throat hard enough to make her breathing come in short pants. It was a delicate balance he’d long perfected. “You and Mia, both’a ya… she’s my good girl, but you’re my sweet girl… my sweet, sweet girl and I’m so proud of you… you’re doin’ so good…”

She spasmed around him at that, breath escaping as a desperate keen as she closed her eyes. Tears spilled from the corners and he kissed them away, knowing she was crying from the intensity and not anything negative. She was almost there, just starting to give in, and so was he.

“C’mon, Darlin’, lemme feel it…” He freed her throat and reached down to hitch her leg up higher, changing the angle just right. “Yeah, that’s it… gonna come so hard for me…”

She opened her eyes again and looked down between them, watching the slick slide of his length as it disappeared inside her over and over again. She clutched at his fingers, then pressed her forehead to his and panted wordlessly against his lips. _There we go._

“It’s comin’… Almost there…”

Her walls started to flutter and he crushed his lips to hers at the same time he brought his fingers to her clit, rubbing in tight small circles. When she sucked in a harsh breath, he thrust in hard, pushing them both over the edge as she clamped down so tight she almost milked his orgasm from him. His name was ripped from her lips as her entire body writhed with it, pulsating around his length again and again to draw out her pleasure until she fell limp against the mattress.

He kissed her sweat-dampened forehead and carefully pulled out of her, setting off another smaller climax which had her sobbing.

“Please… _p-please…_ ” she begged. “M-My hands.”

Shane quickly undid the belt with shaking fingers and tossed it to the side as she immediately wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him flush against her from head to toe. He peppered kisses over her face, letting her process it all and slowly bringing her back down. She felt everything so intensely, he knew he wouldn’t be moving until she fell asleep. She was always so clingy when she was like this, but in the best way, like she never wanted to let him go.

“I gotcha,” he breathed, mouth meeting hers in a soft kiss. “I gotcha.”

Sophie buried her face in his neck and shuddered beneath him, cries eventually slowing to unsteady breaths. He blindly reached out a hand for Mia and squeezed her fingers tightly when she stretched hers out in answer, promising he hadn’t forgotten her.

“I know,” she assured him, lifting their joined hands to her lips.

Shane pressed a gentle kiss to Sophie’s temple and smiled when she barely stirred. Her hands had eased their vice like grip against his skin and her breathing had evened out into sleep quicker than he’d anticipated. She’d been so tired recently that it didn’t take much to send her off, and he knew she wouldn’t be waking up for anything any time soon.

Seeing her so vulnerable made his chest ache with the thought of the two of them being alone without him, and he couldn’t bring himself to roll off her even though she wouldn’t have noticed. He sighed softly and kissed her forehead, filled with more tenderness than he knew what to do with.

“Look after her?” he whispered.

Mia squeezed his fingers tightly. “Always.”

He lifted his head and gazed into her blue eyes, struck by the strength within them. He knew she meant it. She’d do anything to keep Sophie safe, and her sister would do anything to protect her in return – of that, he had no doubt. But he couldn’t help but worry anyway. His entire fucking world was going to be on the other side of that wall while he was trapped on the outside, and it was so wrong, so abhorrent to think of all the-

“Stop.” Mia carded her fingers through his hair. “It’s gonna be fine.”

“I can’t lose you,” he mumbled. “Either of you.”

“You won’t lose us, Shane, not ever” she murmured. “I promise.”


	10. Another Stranger (nice to meet you, sir)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They were close now, barely even ten meters away, and Sophie let herself stumble, almost dragging Mia down with her.
> 
> “Come on!” Mia cried, tugging Sophie to her feet again, like it was the hardest thing in the world. “Please! Please!”
> 
> They reached the gate and started to rattle it, pounding tired fists against the metal until Sophie sagged against it and fell to her knees with a sob.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay - this was an exceptionally tough one to write for both of us for personal reasons.
> 
> Hope you enjoy! xx

Morning came too soon for all three of them. The effort it took to detangle themselves from each other, the slow movements with which they dressed themselves... each of them felt the weight of the day settle heavy on their shoulders before they even left the bedroom.

They ate in silence, just a small meal but enough to get them through the long journey ahead, but Shane kept in constant contact with them. It didn't matter if it was knees knocking as they sat, a hand on a shoulder or lips brushing against hair - he had to touch them.

They weren't taking much with them. The girls couldn't risk carrying too much without looking suspicious, so Shane made sure they had enough water for them to drink in the Jeep and sharpened the knives they'd be carrying himself to make sure they were ready.

Nothing could go wrong, there. He wouldn't let it.

He handed them each their blade and headed to the Jeep, ignoring the screaming in his head that begged him not to. Sophie joined him in the front as always, tired eyes meeting his with a soft smile, while Mia sat behind him and looped her arms over the back of his seat to rest her hands on his chest in silent reassurance. He took a moment to breathe, then turned the ignition.

The Jeep rumbled gently down the empty desolate roads. Every bump or pothole felt like a gunshot and every turn felt like they would topple over. Even though Shane drove slowly, the trip didn't take much time at all. It was mid-morning when he parked nestled in a grove of trees and out of view of the road. 

The key turned and silence rang around them. The trio not wanting to move but needing to all the same. This needed to be done, and quickly. Shane was prolonging it but he couldn't help it, these were his girls, his life. 

"Come on, Darlin’,” he spoke gently and squeezed Sophie's hand before he climbed out, stepping over to open Mia's door to help her out. His navy ball cap was nestled on her head and her chestnut locks gently blew in the light breeze.

He could see the fear in her eyes, hidden beneath a strong-willed determination to do what had to be done. And even if he told her to stay, asked them both to let him do it, they would refuse. 

Shane lifted his hand and cupped the side of Mia's neck, thumb brushing over her pulse point as he stared long and hard at her face. As if she would be gone forever and he needed to remember every startling detail of her lips and the exact shade of her eyes… the slight crook in her nose where it had been broken a long time ago and never set back perfectly.

His brow furrowed and he lifted his hand from her neck, almost hearing the whimper of want from her lips as he pulled away. "Shhh, just a sec."

He fiddled with the back of his neck, undoing a clasp before tugging the silver chain from under his shirt. The number 22 hung loosely and light from the thin chain, sparkling a bit in the warm rays of the morning sun as he held it between them. She'd seen it a hundred times or more - the only thing that never leaves his person, ever.

"Shane?" Mia wondered as Sophie moved round the Jeep to join them, confusion marring the younger twin’s face as she watched Shane pull Mia toward him and turn her around to face her sister as he clasped the chain behind her neck. 

The light metal felt heavy around her throat. The number pendant dropping between her breast from the length of the chain. She turned her head, confused, as Shane smiled and brushed some wayward locks of hair from her face. 

"Keep it safe, yeah?" 

“Course,” Mia whispered, voice thick as she twisted round to face him again. He cupped her face in his hands and stared at her again, eyes just as intense as before, until he ducked his head and captured her lips with his.

He kissed her long and slow, drawing out the moments before he’d have to stop, then pressed his forehead to hers as he bit back everything he wanted to say. This wasn’t a goodbye. It wasn’t.

“There’s water in the Jeep,” he murmured lowly instead. “Drink it.”

Mia nodded as she brought her hands up to squeeze his wrists, then slowly stepped back and gave him a teasing smile. “Dad mode already.”

The chuckle he let out broke the tension, made it easier to breathe. She was always so good at that, giving him what he didn’t even know he needed.

“Just practicing for when this is over.”

_When._ Not _if._

“You don’t need to,” Mia replied lightly. “You’re good at looking after the people you love. The baby won’t be any different.”

Shane glanced behind him to where Sophie was standing by the Jeep with her back turned, giving them a modicum of privacy, and felt his chest try to tighten again.

“Take your time,” Mia whispered, pressing her hand over his heart. “You both need it.”

“Mia…” Shane began, but she simply smiled at him, bringing her other hand up to cover the pendant hidden by her clothes.

“I got this,” she reminded him. “I’ll have you with me regardless.”

He nodded, but still brought her back for another kiss that was deeper than the last, unable to stop himself. _Not a goodbye. Not a goodbye._

Mia shook her head as they parted, then pressed her lips to his cheek as she moved past him on her way to the Jeep. She took the bottle of water Sophie handed to her gratefully and walked around to the other side of the vehicle, giving them the same privacy Sophie had granted her.

Sophie kept her back turned, suddenly overwhelmed now they were alone, then bit her bottom lip hard as Shane moved behind her, hands seeking her hips. She didn’t want to cry, but the reality of what they were doing was kicking in and she hated it. It was the right thing to do, of course it was, but that didn’t make it any easier.

“Darlin’…” He dropped a kiss to her shoulder, then turned her to face him, staring at her with that same look he’d given Mia. Like he was memorizing her. Soaking her in.

His sweet girl. The rock that grounded him. The softness to his and Mia’s sharp edges.

He groaned lowly and stepped forwards, pushing her back against the Jeep as his mouth latched onto hers, kissing her with everything he had. Sophie’s hands slipped up to the back of his neck to tug at his hair as she arched into him, lips just as passionate and urgent as his. It was the opposite to his gentleness with Mia for once, all hands and desperate kisses in a flurry of movement that left them both gasping.

Shane reached up and threaded the fingers of one hand through hers, bringing it to his chest, right over his heart.

“Look after it,” he murmured against her lips. “You’ll be takin’ it with you.”

Sophie nodded wordlessly, closing her eyes against the burning in them. Shane cupped her cheek and kissed her forehead tenderly, lips lingering longer than necessary.

“Always,” Sophie whispered. Their gazes met and she forced herself to smile. “We can do this.”

“I know you can,” Shane replied truthfully. He was counting on it. “C’mon… let’s get you ready.”

They checked their blades. Drank their water. Recited their route. The backup one. Then the alternative.

“If anythin’ seems off, anythin’ at all…” He looked between the two of them, expression hardening at the thought. “You get the Hell outta there, you hear me?”

The twins nodded.

“You sure you wanna do this bit?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Sophie replied, stepping forward. “We can’t show up in fresh clothes.”

Shane let out an unsteady breath, then closed the distance between them and kissed her softly as he brought his hands up to fist the fabric of her tank top and pull hard. The fabric gave instantly, ripping right over where some of the worst scars on her back laid. She pressed her forehead against his as he did the same to the front, like she’d been grabbed, then moaned when he reached up to rumple her hair, fingers delicate despite the roughness.

He did the same to Mia, even going as far as tearing at the belt loops on either side of her hips, before taking a shaky step back. He couldn’t look at the damage he’d done to their clothes, reminded too heavily of why he’d had to do it in the first place.

“You should get goin’,” he told them softly. “Want you there well before dark.”

The two of them stepped forwards into his waiting arms and clung on tight, absorbing all the strength they could and pushing it back to him as he kissed each of their foreheads in turn. They didn’t say anything – words would have done more harm than good – just simply pressed their lips to his once before squeezing his hands and stepping away.

They reluctantly turned and started towards the mental path they’d mapped, squeezing each other’s hands for support, only to stop at the sound of Shane’s cracked voice.

“Girls?”

The pair twisted round to look at him and smiled, mirror images of each other.

He didn’t need to say a thing.

“We know.”

With that, they pushed on.

It wasn’t the longest journey in the world, maybe three to five miles, but they progressed slowly, carefully, making sure anyone who may backtrack their footsteps wouldn’t be able to follow them in a straight line. They couldn’t look like they knew where they were going, so took wrong turns and went in circles… footsteps shuffled and tentative.

After almost an hour, Sophie caught her foot on a tree root and stumbled forwards, rolling her ankle slightly. Mia rushed to stop her falling, one hand on her upper arm, the other on her sister’s stomach in an instinctual move she didn’t even notice.

“You good?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Sophie replied, voice tight with frustration. As she took a steadying breath she looked down at her wrists and turned them, noting the bruises that were forming from the belt the night before. “We’re too clean.”

“Huh?”

“Our clothes, our hands…” Sophie clarified. “We’re still too clean.”

The crackling of twigs nearby made them both freeze. But then they heard the low groans and Mia couldn’t help but smile.

“Perfect timing.”

Mia didn't draw her blade just yet. Instead waited until the monster made its way to them, a growling groan rising from its throat as it waddled haphazardly toward them. Something was broken in one of its legs, causing it to move slower than usual. 

"Get its attention," Mia said and Sophie nodded, grabbing a stick and thwacking it to the ground and onto the saplings around them. 

The walker groaned and started for Sophie as Mia came around its side, jutting out her leg to trip it to the ground. Sophie drew her own blade and stepped forward, sinking the metal into its skull with a sickening crunch of bone and rotten brains. 

Mia knelt down, blade unsheathed and slicing into its legs. She shoved the blade into the earth beside her and looked up at Sophie before biting her lips and grimacing as she reached forward, sinking her hands into rotted flesh and muscle.

Handfuls of gunk smeared onto Mia’s jeans and over her bare arms, her face and throat making a gagging motion as the smell of rotted human reached her nostrils full force, sending a sudden bout of nausea straight through her. It'd been a long while since they'd smelled something that foul.

"You alright?" Sophie asked as she tried to cover her mouth with her ripped top, half-gagging a bit herself as she rubbed putrid blood deep into her nails and skin.

"Yeah." It was a lie – she was about to spew – but she held it back as she dug into the dirt with her blade, digging her hands into the soft earth down into her nails and scrubbing it over the knees of her jeans and her neck and cheeks as well. 

She glanced up at Sophie, who was just as covered in gunk, and watched her walk over to one of the bigger trees nearby. Her sister hesitated, then leaned her bicep against the trunk and pushed hard as she dragged herself across the bark.

“Fuck!” she hissed as it tore against her skin, but that didn’t stop her doing the same for her leg and back. This was for Shane, for the baby, for Mia and for herself… it had to be believable.

Mia’s mouth fell open in shock, but no sound came out until Sophie turned to face the tree and she realized what she was about to do.

“No!” She scrambled to her feet and yanked at Sophie’s arm to pull her away. “Jesus fuck, are you fucking crazy? Not your face!”

“Fine,” Sophie conceded. “Then hit me.”

“What?”

“Hit me,” Sophie urged. “Look, when we… after we… after _that_? You didn’t see how bad you looked. You didn’t really even see _me_ until after I was cleaned up, and… we can’t have them questioning us, wondering how all our wounds are so healed up and none of them are even slightly fresh.”

She had a point, Mia had thought the same, but actually hitting her sister? Causing her pain?

Sophie’s fist swung out of nowhere, colliding with the side of Mia’s temple hard enough to make her stagger.

“What the fuck?!”

Sophie shook her hand out, eyes filled with guilt but face determined. “C’mon.”

Mia stared at her twin for a long moment. Taking a deep shaky breath, she clenched her hand into a fist and reeled back, then let go, her knuckles coming to contact just under Sophie's left eye.

"Oh my God, Sophie, are you okay?!" Mia sounded terrified, reaching out to Sophie timidly. She sounded like Shane had when he'd seen the bruises on Sophie's forearm from grabbing her. 

"It's fine." Sophie grimaced and touched her cheekbone, then looked to her sister and tried to smile a bit to ease her twins anxiety at hitting her.

It went like that for twenty minutes, trading blows and scratches with the other until they were sore and shaking from the effort of going at each other.  They hated it.

Mia's nose was steadily bleeding. Not broken, but close. Sophie's left eye was getting puffy and bruising. Both had nail scratches and fingerprint-shaped bruises over their arms alongside the ones Shane had given them last night. They looked a mess. 

"Ready for this?" Mia asked her twin softly, sheathing her blade, before grabbing a handful of dirt in her fist and rubbing it into her cap to make it look filthy.

“Gotta get it done, right?” Sophie mumbled, tangling her muck-covered fingers through her hair. She couldn’t look at her sister anymore – too much, too raw, too soon – but took her hand in hers instead as the two of them continued to stumble through the trees together, feet clumsier from exertion now.

The road that led to Alexandria wasn’t far, but they deliberately avoided getting too close, diverting themselves until they reached a clear patch in the trees that exposed the road fully so it would look like they’d naturally found it instead of having sought it out. Before they exposed themselves, though, Sophie tugged on Mia’s hand to bring her to a stop and forced herself to meet her sister’s gaze.

“You remember it?” she whispered quietly. “How it felt… when he found us? How scared we- do you remember?”

Mia shivered. “Yeah. I remember.”

“You held onto me so tight. You wouldn’t back down, and you were…” Tears welled up in Sophie’s eyes and she didn’t fight them. They needed to get into that headspace again, they _needed_ to bring all those memories to the surface and live them. They had to become those two girls in that freezer again, because it was the only way. “I thought you were dyin’. You were bleeding so bad... and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.”

“Just like when others died,” Mia croaked, throat tight. “Those girls… we didn’t even know their names.”

Sophie whimpered and took a step back, away from the road. “Mia… I don’t know if I- this is-”

“We can do this,” she managed to get out. She tugged on Sophie’s hand and deliberately pressed against her bruised wrist to remind her why. “C’mon. Use this.”

Sophie nodded and stopped trying to hold everything back, forced her feet to move towards the road as Mia allowed some tears of her own to fall, tracking a trail down her dirtied face so the Alexandrians would see. They didn’t say anything as they slowly staggered their way along, arms around each other to stop themselves from slipping too deep. There was a line between acting and giving in, and although they were toying with it, they couldn’t afford to blur it completely. It was hard as Hell.

They got halfway down towards the gate before they were spotted. Mia clocked the head of the person on watch as it ducked from the top of the wall and pulled Sophie closer into her side in silent signal. The younger twin immediately sagged against her, quiet cries tumbling out of her as they hurried their steps slightly, like salvation was so close…

“Help!” Mia called, voice desperate. “Is anyone there? Please!”

They were close now, barely even ten meters away, and Sophie let herself stumble, almost dragging Mia down with her.

“Come on!” Mia cried, tugging Sophie to her feet again, like it was the hardest thing in the world. “Please! _Please!”_

They reached the gate and started to rattle it, pounding tired fists against the metal until Sophie sagged against it and fell to her knees with a sob.

“Let us in!” Mia begged. It was so easy to slip into that role again, of the pleading older sister. But that’s all it was – a role. And the look on Sophie’s face as she weakly bashed at the gate confirmed she was on the same page. “You gotta help us! Please!”

The noise they were making attracted a few walkers, and Sophie clawed herself to her feet, cries becoming urgent as they pretended to panic.

“Please! Please!” she wailed, letting all her exhaustion and anxiety seep through.

The nearest walker got a little close for comfort and Sophie’s stomach churned, but Mia moved to shield her and allowed the walker close enough to have it almost pin her to the gate. Her hand pushed at its neck, keeping the jaws away, and the other grabbed for her knife. She resisted the urge to use it and Sophie screamed for help again, keeping an eye on the other walkers approaching.

It was a gamble, one that could blow their cover if they were forced to act, but just as the walker’s jaws snapped dangerously close to her face, a shot rang out and the suddenly half-headless corpse fell to the side, dragging Mia down with it.

“Mia!” Sophie keened, dropping to her knees beside her sister as three more shots rang out to take down the other walkers before they could get too close. She pushed the rotten body off her sister and met her gaze, triumph glinting in her eyes when the gate finally, blessedly, slid open.

Hands grabbed at Sophie’s arms to haul her back while another set reached for Mia, dragging them both across the boundary line and into the compound. The moments the gates were closed and secured, the twins began to struggle.

“No!” Sophie screeched, scratching at the hands that restrained her. “Mia!”

“Get off me!” Mia dropped like deadweight as Sophie managed to break free of the man who held her’s hold, and the two scrambled desperately towards each other like the touch of the others had burned them.

“Hey, hey, hey,” a voice calmed. “We ain’t gon’ hurt’cha.”

“That’s what they said,” Sophie whimpered. “That’s what they always say.”

A pair of feet took a step forward and Mia immediately uncurled herself, knife brandished but deliberately shaking as she looked up at the man who immediately held his hands up. Blue met blue. Rick.

“Don’t touch us,” Mia hissed, covering Sophie best she could.

“You’re hurt,” Rick reasoned. “Pretty bad, by the looks of things. We can help. Patch you up, get you on your way…”

Mia looked around, like raw panic was making her catalogue everything around her. In reality, she was taking stock of who was there – Rick, a dark-skinned man who looked like a priest, a ponytailed woman in a ballcap… Carl.

Sophie groaned beside her and curled up in a ball, arms wrapped around her stomach. She was so convincing that, for a moment, fear jolted down Mia’s spine and she wondered if the walker had got her somehow, maybe hurt the baby.

“Mia,” she whimpered as one of her hands shot out to grab her sister’s and squeezed harder than necessary. “Please…”

"I assure you we mean you no harm," the priest-looking man tried to soothe. But then he took a step forwards, and Mia reacted instinctively.

Her feet scrambled to face the dark-skinned man and in turn she stumbled forward and to the side, her ankles tripping over the other as she tried to protect herself. She meant to catch herself on her hands – it was why she let go of her blade as she fell. 

But she didn't get her up quick enough and the force smacked her temple to the ground, knocking her out cold. Her body slumped across the ground, unconscious. 

"Oh, my God!" Sophie stumbled herself and knelt at her sister’s side, picked up Mia's blade, then held it in a half-deliberate and half-genuinely trembling hold in the direction of anyone who came too close. 

"Easy, easy." Rick knelt down on one knee to her eye level, and Sophie knew he could see the fear in her wide gaze. Mia wasn't supposed to do that to herself - it scared Sophie shitless with her twin unconscious. 

"Please, just... " Sophie sobbed and dropped the knife. That careful edge they'd been walking was precarious and she didn’t have her balance with Mia unconscious. "Don't..."

Her position over her sister was eerily similar to the one she’d been in when Shane had found them and Mia had passed out.

"It's okay." Rick held up both hands placatingly and Sophie saw the pity in his eyes at the sight of them. Her mind came back a bit from that edge, knowing who this man was and what he'd done to Shane. 

Rick motioned for the woman in the ponytail to come forward along with a larger girl with glasses. "Take her to the hospital." 

The two women came forward and Sophie took a moment to let the woman pick up and carry her sister. Mia's ballcap fell from her head and Sophie reached down to pick it up, clutching it in her hands as Rick came as close as Sophie acted comfortable with and walked them to the infirmary.

Sophie made sure to stumble every few steps, then let herself tip forwards until she almost toppled to the ground, only for Rick to catch her by the elbow as she’d hoped. She flinched as if his touch had burned her, bringing her hand up into his line of sight in the process. The moment Rick spotted the bruising on her wrists, his eyes widened slightly.

Her plan had worked.

“Please don’t hurt me,” she croaked weakly. The sound of her own voice was like a nightmare from the past, making her shudder. _Focus. Use it._

“I won’t,” he promised, wariness giving way to concern. “We just wanna help ya.”

_Aw, c’mon, Dollface, we just wanna help ya…_

“No,” Sophie whimpered, shaking her head as her skin started to crawl. “No, no, no, no, no….”

Her knees wobbled violently and she was suddenly grateful Rick hadn’t released her elbow yet.

“Easy, now,” he murmured softly. “I ain’t gonna hurt ya.”

In that moment, he reminded her so much of those first few words Shane had spoken to her that she couldn’t help but let out a sob and lean in to him. Rick hesitantly placed a hand on her back, making her hiss in response, then inhaled sharply at the sight of some of her scars through the rips in her top. The _feel_ of the raised flesh under his fingers. Tangible. Undeniable.

“Christ.”

Tears spilled over as memories of what had caused those scars suddenly rose to the forefront of Sophie’s mind, but she forced herself to keep moving, refusing to give in. With Mia down for the count like she was, it was up to her to play the part for them both and she couldn’t let either her or Shane down at the first hurdle.

Once they eventually managed to make it to the infirmary, the pony-tailed woman set Mia down on one of the beds and Sophie didn’t hesitate to go straight to her sister’s side, sweeping Mia’s hair back from her face and grimacing at the bruise already forming on her temple. She was going to be out for a while.

“Our doctor, she…” Rick cleared his throat awkwardly. “She’s no longer with us, but my- one of the women here, she might be able to help.”

“I don’t-” Sophie began, but then Lori emerged from the back of the infirmary and all words suddenly failed her. The woman could barely meet Rick’s eyes as she stepped forwards, though that didn’t stop her from immediately moving towards Mia.

“No,” Sophie objected, shaking her head and moving to shield her sister from the woman who reminded her of so much darkness. “No, it’s- it’s okay, I can do it.”

“You can barely stand,” Lori pointed out, voice timid and lacking the slur Sophie had expected. She clearly hadn’t been at the bottle yet today. Or maybe she was so used to it by now that she’d learned to be a functioning alcoholic, like their mother had been.

Sophie pulled the tatters of her top around her body as if she was self-conscious and shifted a little closer to Mia. At some point, the ponytailed woman and the priest had left the infirmary, leaving just the twins and the dysfunctional Grimes family behind, and she absently wondered if there was something symbolic in that.

She let one of her hands drop to her lower stomach protectively – a movement that came second nature to her, now. Lori’s eyes followed the movement and the woman stiffened slightly.

“Rick, can you give us a moment, please?” she asked curtly.

When Rick didn’t immediately move, Lori shot him a glare that had his jaw clenching tightly and moved closer to him, though neither of them looked happy about it. Sophie filed that tension away for later.

“I need to ask a few things,” she continued lowly, barely loud enough for Sophie to hear. “You being here won’t help.”

“We don’t know them,” Rick pointed out. “They could be volatile.”

“Can you blame them?” Lori countered. “Look at the state of them.”

“I don’t think-”

“You really want to do this here?” she cut in. “In front of them? They’re petrified enough already.”

“We need to know where they came from,” Rick argued.

“I think we’ve got a more important things to worry about,” Lori told him, shooting a glance at Sophie.

The younger twin swallowed thickly, suddenly realizing why Lori had stiffened when she’d looked at her.

“I know what you’re- what you’re gonna ask,” she mumbled quietly, and she had to take a deep breath to steady herself before she could continue, feeling Rick’s eyes on her as well now. “But I, uh… I’m not c-c-certain if… I-I mean, I _th-think_ I… I’m…”

She wouldn’t say the words out loud. The only person who earned the right to hear them was Shane. The thought of _these people_ finding out before him had her tearing up in no time. It wasn’t fair. _Use it._

A sob escaped her throat and she wrapped an arm around her lower stomach, the movement unmistakable for anything other than what she wanted it to be, then reached out a shaking hand to hold Mia’s. “It might be- They did-didn’t want… They tried to stop… I bled, but…”

The words blubbered out of her until she curled up and let her cried come loud and full, leaving no room for further questioning from either of them. The vaguer the twins were about what happened to them, the better – the Alexandrians would fill in the blanks for themselves.

Sophie flinched when Lori took a step forward, drawing attention to the cuts and bruises left on her skin as she shifted. She hated how well her body fell back into that routine, but used it to her advantage. It was all she had to keep her head above water.

“Christ,” Rick muttered, looking nauseous.

“We need Carson,” Lori told him. “I… This isn’t…” She looked to Sophie. “We know someone. An obstetrician. He can help you.”

_“He_ _-He?_ N-no, I…” Sophie shook her head violently. “I should- I need-”

Mia groaned and Sophie snapped round to look at her, hands rising to cup Mia’s cheeks as she slowly regained consciousness.

The room seemed to pause around Sophie as Mia stirred, fought the haziness from her eyes, and struggled to sit up again. And when she did, her blue eyes opened to find Rick closer than she liked, and the dark eyes of Lori made it worse. Sophie could see the minute, genuine anxiety in her sister’s eyes before she fully ‘panicked’. 

Mia shoved herself off the med table and stumbled to her feet, eyes wide and fearful as she shoved Sophie behind her and back into the corner of the room. She hid her sister behind her frame as much as she could, hand reaching for a blade that wasn't there, and she started frantically patting her legs for it even though she knew it was gone. Part of the act. 

"It's okay… it's okay." Lori’s voice hit Mia like the crack of a whip. Her eyes burned hot with fear and an undertone of anger that Rick and his wife could both see as she kept Sophie behind her, arms spread wide and legs apart, hands in fists that were shaking by her sides. 

"Mia..." Sophie's hand on her back brought her back from the other side. The one where she wasn't acting and it was all real, her protectiveness and movements. And they couldn't be that way. 

"Where are we?" Her voice was like cracked steel, strong yet wavering under the weight of what had happened to them. She was back from that edge, but only just. And her hatred for the woman before her wasn’t helping Mia keep her head on her shoulders. 

"You fell, they brought you to the infirmary," Sophie whispered softly and Mia stood a little straighter at the sound of her voice. 

Mia looked around, using the emotions in her gaze to hide the fact she was cataloging every medical instrument and gauze pad in her line of sight, trying her best to flinch away every time she caught Rick’s gaze. 

“You’re in bad shape,” he tried to explain. Mia scoffed. “But we have a friend in another community. He can help you.”

The twins both stiffened and Sophie let out a whine as Mia took the opportunity to plant the seed they so desperately needed to grow.

“Another comm-community?” Her voice cut out and she forced herself to laugh, infusing it with panic. “You’re with _them._ ”

Sophie started to back away, towards the door Lori had come through, and dragged Mia along with her.

“With who?” Lori wondered.

“ _Them!”_ Mia all but shouted. “We should never’ve come here, we need to- we need-”

Rick took a step forward, and Mia yelped, reaching out to pull a trolley that was usually used for medical supplies between them like a protective barrier.

“No!” She let it all flood back to her. “No more! Please… no more…”

_I’m begging you… please, not today… no… no, please… Please…_

“Calm down. Take a deep breath,” Rick tried. “We ain’t gon’ hurt you.”

“They’re on their way, aren’t they?” Mia choked out bitterly. “That’s why you took us in.”

“Who?” Lori pressed. “Who’s on their way?”

“Don’t,” Mia spat. “Don’t even try… You know exactly who he is.”

“He?” Rick echoed. His face dropped, turning almost stone-like. _“Negan?_ ”

Sophie doubled over and clung to Mia as her sister recoiled, like the name had physically hurt her.

“Did he do this to you?” Lori gasped. The concern on her face made Mia feel sick. She wanted to slap it off.

“ _They_ did,” Sophie whimpered, using the knowledge they’d picked up from their observations to their advantage. “They’re all Negan.”

"We... We need to go..." Mia pushed at Sophie, got her upright, and kicked the trolley out towards Rick as he moved toward them.

They bolted through the hall of the house-turned-infirmary, bursting from the back door and looking around as if confused on where to go. They knew the layout of this place better than the people living here. But they couldn’t act like it. 

"Come on!" Mia grabbed her twin’s hand and started running, making sure she limped in her gait some, and clutched at her sister as they rushed past the people milling about outside.

They acted like it was a maze, running between homes until finally finding an area of the fence that was nowhere near any of the main gates. Mia threw herself against the steel fence, finding no purchase, and with Sophie dropping down to her knees beside her she felt that feeling of claustrophobia start to surround her, making it hard to breathe and think as she flung herself upwards to try and climb the solid structure.

_“No, no, no, no, no…” she sobbed, scrambling towards the door. “Don’t leave us in here!”_

_“Please!” Sophie screamed as the bar between her ankles bit into her skin. “Please, no!”_

_Mia scratched at the floor as the thin beam of light from outside started to disappear and the laughter that never seemed to end rang through the space instead, filling it up and up and up._

Her chest started to cave in and her hands became almost wild in their urgency to _get out._ She couldn’t see what was in front of her, couldn’t do anything but _run_.

_She chased it, crawled and begged and screamed, desperate for anything apart from the dark._

_“No! I’ll do whatever you want!”_

_Mia threw herself against the cold metal, body too weak to do anything but crunch in protest, then collapsed as the chain reached its limit, her knees crashing against the concrete and cracking open the wounds from when they’d had her on her-_

“Mia!”

Suddenly, Sophie’s forehead was against hers and she gasped in a breath, feeling like ice water had just been dumped over her head.

“It’s okay,” her sister whispered. “You’re okay. You’re okay.”

The whimper that escaped her lips was foreign, and so was the feeling of cool metal being pressed against her skin when Sophie took her hands and brought one up to her chest, while letting the other rest against her sister’s stomach.

“Good girl,” Sophie breathed. “C’mon. There’s a good girl.”

_You’re my good girl, ain’t ya? All mine._

“Sh-… Soph…” she managed to croak, catching herself before she let Shane’s name slip out.

“I know,” Sophie sighed. “It’s okay.”

She shifted so Mia could lean against her more heavily, then looked up to find the Alexandrian’s staring at them both in stunned silence. Any dubious looks or doubt had been erased from their faces, leaving them all looking absolutely horrified. Sophie understood why.

Watching somebody have a waking nightmare was always terrifying.

“Help us,” she begged weakly, seeking out Rick in the crowd. _“Please.”_

He nodded, but didn’t make a move to come any closer. “Okay. We’ll help you.”

_Help_ consisted of allocating them a house. Water. Electricity. Food. They’d been allowed distance while being shown around, probably due to Rick and his people wanting to stay the fuck away from the crazy girls for their own safety rather than trying to help make things less stressful. But the twins didn’t complain.

They were both shaken up from where their minds had taken them. Neither one of them had wanted or expected to end up back in that headspace that deeply.

They sat on the bathroom floor while the other took a hot shower, too freaked out to fully appreciate the genuinely _hot_ spray, before retreating to the bedroom they’d decided to share and lying on the bed, facing each other. The doctor from the other community – Hilltop, one of the marked places they’d seen on their recovered map – wouldn’t be arriving until the next day, so they were granted some privacy until then.

Sophie shifted across the mattress until she could press her forehead to Mia’s and clutched her sister’s hands tightly. “We did it.”

Mia only nodded, taking the strength Sophie offered. She’d never realized how much she’d relied on Shane to keep her from... from whatever she turned into earlier. Sophie was her calm, but Shane was the solid rooted rock in the middle of the raging river she’d almost drowned in earlier. 

She clutched to Sophie's hands tight, a lone tear dripping down the bridge of her nose to land on the bed between them. Her hand shook, just a bit, as she reached down the neck of her short and clutched at the necklace Shane had given her. She took a deep breath and calmed the raging of her mind. 

"We can do this. We have to." Mia opened her eyes to meet Sophie's. "We have to for Shane." 

Sophie nodded and they curled up together like they always had. Mia on the right, Sophie on the left. Arms and limbs tangled and seeking comfort in the night as they tried to sleep. 

_It started slow. It always did._

_He liked drawing it out like that._

_The blade glinted in the light, reflecting off the wall._

_She heard him move before she felt it._

_Her legs shook and her body tried to recoil as her skin tore in a jagged line, burning, stinging… agony._

_“P-Please,” she begged. “No more. I’ll be good this time! I pr-promise.”_

_“You pr-pr-promise?” he sneered. “Aww, sugar, I love it when you talk real nice like that. But that’s not the rules, is it?”_

_She bowed her head and sobbed weakly. He was the worst. He didn’t just take like the others. He made her plead until he let her give it to him. Like he was the one being forced._

_“Don’t cry,” he taunted, hand replacing the blade in an abomination of gentleness. “You know what you need to say, don’t you?”_

_She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t make her mouth form the words._

_He was standing by her head now, but she knew better than to try to straighten up._

_He crouched down and shoved his hand under her chin so she had no choice but to lift her head for him to stare at her face._

_“So pretty,” he sighed. “Come on, girlie, don’t make carve up that gorgeous little back even more. You know I hate punishing you.”_

_“P-please,” she finally croaked. “F-F-fuck m-m-me, D-D-Daddy.”_

_His grin made her want to scream. But he liked it when she did that. Liked hearing her voice go hoarse from the sounds he ripped out of her. She didn’t want the punishment that came with making that much noise. Not tonight. Not again._

_“Oh, Dollface, of course I will. You asked me so nicely, how can I say no to that face after that?” he cooed. He slowly unbuckled his belt and pulled himself from his pants, hard as always. “Now open up and get Daddy nice and wet so he can put his cock in that sweet little puss-”_

Sophie jerked with a scream on her lips and had to bite down on her fist to stop the sound escaping, body drenched with sweat from the exertion it took to hold back.

_No, no, no, no, no…_

She looked across to Mia – who still clutched the necklace - and stifled a sob, the absence of the person who usually slept in the space between them hitting her like a sledgehammer straight to the chest.

She couldn’t do this.

She threw herself out of bed and ran.

Down the stairs.

Out the door.

No shoes. No socks.

Just her torn tank top and a pair of borrowed men’s boxers that weren’t _his._

The cool night air hit her skin but she didn’t notice.

Her feet carried her of their own accord. She didn’t care where to. She just wanted _out._

She ended up crumbling to the ground at the fence, on the other side of the wall to their tree. The realization made her laugh out a sob.

God, what she’d do to have something of Shane’s to cling on to like Mia did.

But then she remembered that she did, in some strange way.

Her hands lowered to her stomach and she let her head tilt back against the fence, hitting it with a soft clang. Breathing was easier out here in the dark. Less suffocating. Safer.

A few more days. That’s all. She could do that.

Tap.

Tap.

Tap.

It was almost a dull yet sharp sound somehow, like two rocks colliding. So quiet, she almost didn’t hear it.

_Tap-tap-tap._

_Tap tap tap._

_Quick, slow, slow, quick._

_Tap-tap-tap-tap._

And then a pause.

_Tap tap-tap. Quick slow. Quick slow quick. Quick slow quick-quick. Tap-tap. Slow quick._

She inhaled sharply as it finally sunk in.

S O P H

D A R L I N

 “ _Oh, God..._ ” Tears streamed down her cheeks as she scrambled to make her brain translate the next set.

_Tap-tap tap. Tap tap tap. Slow quick slow._

U O K

He was there.

Oh, fuck, he was _there._

She could almost sense his worry in the silent question.

She buried her face in her hands so nobody would be able to see her mouth move if they looked her way, unable to stop herself smiling.

“Sha-…” She stopped herself. She could be wrong. Could be going fucking crazy. “Can you hear me?”

Y E S

The whimper that escaped her lips was pathetic but she didn’t care.

U A L O N E

God, it was the sweetest torture.

“Yes!” She lowered her tone. “I’m alone.”

A few seconds, and then…

“I checked for a gap in the fence, but there ain’t one. I’m sorry – I really wanted t’see you.”

The sound of his voice had her sobbing, and her body ached with the need to try climbing over that damned fence, to fall into his arms and have him hold her, just for a second.

"It’s really you.”

“I couldn’t leave y’both,” came the reply. “Been goin’ crazy, watchin’.”

“You’ve been there this whole time?” She suddenly felt horrified at the thought of what he could have seen.

“Just a few hours,” he apologized. “I didn’t wanna risk comin’ too soon, but I’ve been close by…”

“No, no,” Sophie soothed, eyes darting to check nobody else was around still. “Fuck, you’re _here._ ”

“Always,” he promised. “What happened, Sweetheart? You seem-”

 “Nothing,” she half-lied. “It’s nothin’. We’re okay.”

“No, you’re not,” he knew. “I saw ya run.”

Of course he did.

“I had a nightmare,” she confessed as she kept her face covered. To anyone watching, it would look like she was having another breakdown.

“ _Shit_.”

“We can do this,” she insisted. “It’ll be alright, once we’re used to it. Especially now we know you’re here.”

“Darlin’…” Shane sighed, regret tainting his tone. “You can’t tell Mia.”

“What?” Her head lifted automatically and she had to force herself to stay calm. “Shane…”

“She’ll go crazy if she knows,” he pointed out. “I can’t do that to her. Not when I know you’re both sufferin’ already.”

He was right. But it felt wrong, not telling Mia something like this.

She suddenly understood her sister’s struggle over keeping her own secret, now she was keeping Shane’s.

Funny how things worked out that way.

“Okay,” she conceded. “Okay, I won’t tell her.”

A pause. Brief. Filled with longing.

“I miss you.”

Sophie clamped her eyes shut and struggled not to tear through the metal walls with her bare hands to get to him. She pressed her fingertips back against it instead. “I miss you, too.”

“Fuck…” He sounded like he was close to clawing his way in, the echo of his touch against the metal panel proving as much. “Soph…”

Footsteps crunched nearby and Sophie glanced up without moving her head, eyes finding a figure walking the perimeter. A guard.

“Someone’s coming,” she whispered.

“Darlin’-”

“I love you.”

She pushed herself to her feet and scrubbed her hands over her face, moving out the guard’s line of sight before he could see her. She slowly walked around the side of the nearest house until she reached the main street, pace normal but wandering, like she was caught up in a dream and making her way home. Unsuspicious. Timid.

It felt like it had been a dream, talking to him even for those few moments.

Mia was stirring from sleep when she returned to the bedroom, but as soon as Sophie stepped forward to stroke her sister’s hair, she calmed.

They could do this. The two of them, together. Not just for Shane, but for themselves as well.

This wouldn’t break them.

It would be the closure and healing they hadn’t even known they needed.

Sleep came a little easier after that.

Morning broke and brought with it the doctor from the Hilltop. The girls were up hours before he arrived, but daren’t emerge from their bedroom until they heard noise from outside. After all – when Shane had first saved them, all they’d done was sleep to recover from the trauma.

It would be out of place if they appeared to have been doing anything else.

Mia waited in the kitchen, Sophie seated at the bar there with a glass of water in front of her, staring blankly into it. Now it was daylight, they couldn't whisper plans to the other. It was game time. 

She stood leaning on the bar, opposite her sister in clean clothes that weren’t her own. They didn't fit her right, baggy and over-worn. The worst was they didn't have Shane's scent underlying in them. She felt naked… grimy, even though they'd showered again this morning. 

They both locked eyes as a knock sounded at the door. Mia motioned for Sophie to go first and, as her sister got up to get the door, she shook herself, slouched her shoulders and wrapped her arms around her waist. Her hair hung around her face in frizzy waves, needing another cut soon. Timid to its finest. 

Sophie carefully open the door, peeking out through the crack anxiously before pulling it back more fully to reveal the two of them silently evaluating what was outside the door. Mia itched to stab Lori as she looked at them with a pitying smile, but pushed it back. Killing someone would not do well for them. 

"Did we wake you?" Lori asked gently, nicely. It made Mia's stomach roil. 

"Been up a few minutes, haven't slept in a real bed in..." Mia trailed off and looked to the side, hiding behind her hair and shrugging gently. 

“Is that the doctor?” Sophie mumbled timidly, flicking her eyes up to a kind-looking man who stood beside Rick and behind Lori. She didn’t let her gaze linger, averting it like she was afraid.

“Yes,” Lori confirmed softly. “His name is Dr. Harlan Carson. He’s the obstetrician I told you about. We thought it might be best if…”

She glanced backwards and the doctor’s gentle voice finished for her.

“We can use an ultrasound machine to confirm things for you.”

Sophie’s brows shot up in shock at that, and she felt Mia shift behind her.

_They’d get to see the baby._

But then a thought occurred to her.

“I don’t…” Sophie took a small step back, the fear in her next words not even remotely faked. “I don’t want one of those… I don’t want a _thing…”_

“No, no, of course not,” Lori assured her. Sophie hated how genuinely concerned the woman sounded, hated that Mia would probably be growling if she could. She was torn between playing to Lori’s kindness as shutting her out, but they had to start somewhere. “Nothing in-… internal.”

“You have an actual machine?” Mia sounded incredulous and forced herself to tone it down. “How?”

“Perks of the job,” Dr. Carson replied. “Well… old job.”

“One of our women… She’s pregnant,” Lori explained. “You don’t have to have anything you don’t want to, but I’d recommend having the scan. It can be dangerous, being…” She swallowed audibly and shifted as if suddenly uncomfortable. “Trust me.”

_“Trust_ you?” Mia began, but Sophie cut in just in time.

“You were…?” she mumbled, a question in her tone.

“Yes.” Lori was definitely uncomfortable, now. Rick stared off to his left, tapping his fingers against his thigh. “You’ll want to know if there are any complications before they… before they put you in danger.”

She had a point, as much as Sophie hated to admit it.

So they let themselves be escorted to the infirmary. Got patched up. Listened when Rick was told how severe some of their scars were. Heard the whispers of how they must have been held captive a long time. There were no doubts about their story. Not in the slightest.

After all – it was the truth. Just a twisted version of it.

Sophie’s hands shook hard as she pulled up her borrowed t-shirt and unbuttoned the top of her ill-fitting jeans so Dr. Carson wouldn’t need to touch her. Mia was right by her side as always, eyeing the man as fiercely as she could afford to while she watched his every move.

She closed her eyes as the gel was squirted over her lower abdomen and the wand pushed against her skin, filtering out all other noise as she replayed her conversations with Shane over and over in her mind. It was almost as if he were there with her, just like he should have been.

_You girls are everythin’ to me… Anything happens, either one of you end up pregnant? I'll take care of ya. Never doubt that._

He should have been there to see this. He deserved to.

His hand should have been holding the one Mia wasn’t, too, but if she tried hard enough, she could pretend it was.

Her sister inhaled sharply. “Soph…”

_Thumpa-thumpa-thumpa-thumpa._

Sophie’s eyes snapped open and homed in on the grainy screen. “ _Oh…_ ”

She was pregnant.

One hundred percent, undeniably, categorically _pregnant._

“You’re somewhere between seven and eight weeks,” Dr. Carson informed her. He kept his voice neutral. “Does that sound…”

“Yeah.” Sophie’s mouth was slack. “Is… Is it healthy?”

Mia caught the look on the doctor’s face at that question. “Sophie…”

“Yes, I believe so,” Dr. Carson responded carefully.

“So it… _this_ … It’s real.” Sophie’s face was unreadable, no excitement or panic or shock showing. She didn’t know what she was feeling, except longing for Shane. _God,_ to see his face right now… to see his reaction…

“Yes.”

“I want a picture.” The words escaped before she realized what she was saying, but she didn’t want to take them back. She could show him, if she had a picture. She could…

“Sophie.” Mia’s tone was warning, now.

“It’s not the baby’s fault.” Sophie knew what she was doing. This wasn’t her slipping up – this was her getting what she suddenly needed more than anything. “It didn’t choose this. It didn’t pick why it exists.”

She glanced up at Lori, who was standing in the corner six feet away from Rick and looking down at the floor with her eyes clamped shut and a face that screamed regret. Sophie’s word choice had hit home, aggravated an open, festering wound. _Good._

“Can I… Can I have a pi-picture?” she asked. _I want to show Shane._ “Or d-does it not print?”

It did.

Two glossy, grainy yet _perfect_ images.

Sophie cradled them like they were the most precious cargo she’d ever carry in her life – which was kind of ironic really considering what they represented – as the twins followed Lori back to their designated house. They’d almost reached the doorstep when Carl emerged from inside, surprising the Hell out of them.

“Carl, what are you doing here?” Lori hissed.

“Judith was crying,” he replied. “You said you’d be here.”

Lori shook her head, flashing the side she’d so carefully hidden in front of the twins before, then glanced back and smiled. “I’m sorry. My son-”

“It’s okay,” Mia cut in. “The house isn’t really ours.”

Lori smiled tightly, a small movement which shrank away the moment the cries of a wailing baby met their ears.

“Is that your baby?” Sophie gasped, instinctively taking a step forward. _The baby. Shane’s baby._

“Yes, but-”

Sophie didn’t wait for anything more. Instead, she moved past Lori and followed Carl as he went back inside, Mia hot on her tail, and _stared._

“Oh, my God.” She ached to move forwards, to hold the baby, to protect her… but then she caught herself. Back to the timid retreat. “I’m so sorry, that was so rude, I- I-”

“It’s fine,” Lori dismissed. “Hormones. I remember.”

“She’s beautiful,” Sophie sighed. “I didn’t think we’d ever… I thought…”

“We didn’t think there’d be any babies in this world,” Mia finished for her sister. “Not anymore.”

Lori left a few minutes later, carrying the baby as if it was the heaviest burden in the world but was trying so very hard to act like it wasn't. But that was what happened when you made a mistake and had to bear the consequences. It wasn’t the baby that was the problem, not really. It was the fact Shane was her father and Lori had played a part in his perceived demise that was eating the woman alive.

Neither twin felt sorry for her.

Once the door was closed, Mia snarled lowly and went to bust her hand into the wall, but stopped herself just an inch from plaster and stood still, breathing heavy and trying to gain her control back. 

She hated that woman with every single fiber of her being. The way she faked being kind, the looks of disgust and anger toward her own children. Mia wanted to slit her throat, watch her bleed out. And even then, she doubted Lori would even feel fear. _Heartless bitch._

Taking a deep steadying breath, Mia stood, finding her sister watching her intently and giving back a gentle smile. Because Sophie knew exactly what Mia was feeling and understood more than anyone what was going through Mia's mind right now.

"I'm good," Mia sighed softly, wary of prying eyes and ears even inside the nice house they were given to stay in. It didn't feel right… Didn't feel like home.

She stood fully and walked to the couch, sitting beside Sophie who was holding the printed sonograms like a lifeline. She peered down at them and a ghost of a smile spread over her lips. 

"He's gonna be so happy, Sophie." Mia wrapped an arm around her sister’s back and held her close. 

"Yeah..." 

Mia leaned forward slightly to get a better look at her sister’s face and frowned. The younger twin was staring at the picture with an almost blank expression, but Mia caught the flair of her nostrils and the glint of welling tears in her eyes anyway.

“Soph…”

“I should have told him as soon as I realized,” she whispered. “This isn’t right. He deserves…”

She clenched her jaw and looked up at the ceiling, willing herself to stay calm.

“Stop that shit,” Mia chastised. “You know why you couldn’t’ve.”

“Do I?” Sophie countered. “Because I had the opportunity, before we discovered that backpack, and I didn’t. Just like her.”

Mia’s brow furrowed. “What?”

“Lori. You can’t honestly tell me you haven’t noticed I look a little like her? And now I’m acting like her and-” Sophie shook her head and laughed bitterly. “Fuck, I sound like a crazy person.”

“Yeah,” Mia agreed. “You do. You are _nothing_ like her. The only thing even close is the color of your hair, but even that’s questionable.”

Sophie knew that. Rationally. But her emotions were off kilter and it made it hard to stay in control.

“Shane will understand why you didn’t tell him.”

“I know.” His request that she kept his presence a secret to protect Mia proved as much. “I just hate this.”

“Me too,” Mia admitted quietly. “But that’s why we gotta get what we need, and do it quick. Tonight, I’m gonna keep watch and time the guard shifts, figure out the best way in.”

“No need. There’s two in the towers and one walking the perimeter,” Sophie mumbled. “The guards up high can’t see if we go in by the tree, and the perimeter guard isn’t exactly the most vigilant.”

“How the Hell…”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Sophie covered with a shrug. “Nightmares.”

“You shoulda woken me up,” Mia told her, tone frustrated. “I coulda helped.”

“Not this time,” Sophie sighed. “You’re just as messed up as I am, right now. We’d have made each other worse.”

Mia knew she was right. “It’s the same, is it? Without Shane.”

“No. It’s not.” Sophie couldn’t look into Mia’s eyes – she’d cave if she did – so she stood up and ran her fingers through her hair instead. “I’m gonna go shower. You wanna go for a walk, after? We probably oughta scout out Rick’s place a little better, now we’re close.”

After Sophie showered, they both headed out into the street, feeling strange as they walked slowly around the place. It didn't feel safe to them. Too exposed, even with the metal perimeter. 

Walls could be busted down. Trenches could be filled and overrun. Houses could be burned and busted. Solar panels shot to pieces and water pipes broken with no hope of repair.

The streets felt like wide open spaces, just waiting for them to be shot down. 

Mia and Sophie had their hands held together between them, rfusing to let the other go as they 'explored'. Timid smiles were given to those they passed but, if they were male, the girls skirted closer to the other side of the path, avoiding eye contact and hunching up slightly until they were gone. 

The pity in their faces made Mia want to snarl in rage. She didn't go through hell and back several times over to end up weak and timid. This was weighing on her more then she’d expected. With Sophie's grip tight in her own, she knew they needed to get the job done and get the fuck out of there. 

They came up around the corner, knowing it was Rick’s house but acting surprised as they found Carl on the front porch again holding the baby. Mia squeezed Sophie's hand and headed towards the steps, staying off of them but moving close enough to clearly see the baby. Shane's baby. 

“Um…” Mia began timidly. “H-Hi… You’re… You’re Carl, right?”

The boy looked up at her warily.

“S-Sorry,” she mumbled, “I didn’t m-mean to… I-Is your mom…”

“She’s not here,” Carl told her. He sounded almost relieved at that. “Do you want me to go-”

“No, that’s okay,” Mia assured him with a shrug, then tucked some of her hair behind her ear as she took a step closer. “This, uh… this is your sister, right?”

Carl nodded and adjusted the baby on his lap slightly. Her brown eyes blinked sleepily with the movement before she settled again, and Mia had to force herself not to stare into them for more than a few seconds. It was almost unnerving, how identical they were to Shane’s.

“I’m sorry, I, um…” Mia shifted nervously. “I don’t remember her name.”

“Judith,” Carl reminded her, glancing towards Sophie.

“That’s a pretty name,” the younger twin murmured as she smiled softly at him. She took a step forward, stopping slightly behind Mia. “I, uh… I haven’t thought about names yet.”

_Not until Shane’s there to help choose one._

“You’re…?” Carl looked down at her stomach, where her hand seemed to constantly be resting now.

“Mhmm.” Sophie tugged the sides of her borrowed cardigan across her body and tilted her head to get a better look at Judith.  Call it baby-brain, maternal instincts or just straight up longing… all she wanted to do was hold her. It was like staring at the future. “She looks like you.”

Carl shrugged.

“I meant that in a good way,” she said lightly. “Got good genes.”

“I guess.” Carl looked away and shifted uncomfortably.

Sophie felt her chest tighten slightly at the sudden drop in his voice. She hadn’t meant to upset him. That was the last thing she’d wanted to do. “Oh, I’m…”

“Your dad,” Mia began cautiously. She hated that she was having to play a part around the boy – it felt beyond wrong – but she had no choice. Carl’s sadness at the mention of genetics left a gap she had to fill. “Is he not… is he…?”

“He’s alive.” He sounded even more upset all of a sudden. “My dad is alive.”

The emphasis on _my_ was silent, but it rippled through anyway. He knew Judith wasn’t Rick’s.

“Oh,” Mia mumbled. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you two didn’t have the same…”

“It’s okay,” Carl lied. “He died a long time ago. Before she was born.”

"We didn't know our dad." Mia sat on the bottom step, like she was exhausted just from walking and too weak to stand much longer on her own. 

Carl looked at Judith and pursed his lips as he moved his feet a bit. Mia wanted to narrow her eyes – that was a practiced movement that Shane always used when he was thinking about something but didn't know how to bring it up. Her heart hurt. Shane’s influence on the boy ran deeper than she’d realized, even after so much time had passed.

"Was he a good m-man at least?" Sophie asked softly, keeping up the soft stutter in her voice as she kept staring longingly at the baby. 

Carl nodded finally looking up at both sister and landing on Sophie. "Do you…?"

He moved Judith slightly and toward Sophie, silently asking if she'd like to hold the baby. 

After a moment of silence, Sophie nodded silently, eyes wide as she settled on the opposite side of the step to her sister and held out her arms. Taking Judith against her chest was an indescribable feeling that she was quickly lost in. Warmth. Peace. Softness. Awe… An instant connection.

"Your dad? W- Who is he?" Mia asked Carl as he settled back down, scratching gently at the side of his bandage. The one obviously hiding where his eye used to be. Mia wanted to ask what happened, but knew it would cross a line.

"Rick… Rick’s my dad." Again, the slight emphasis on _my_ held an undertone of something. Regret? Hurt? Guilt? Mia wasn’t sure. 

"Oh, I didn't realize..." She left it unsaid. Carl knew what she meant. Rick and Lori acted nothing like a couple and actually seemed to really dislike each other when in close quarters.

Sophie listened to their conversation silently, completely enamored by the little girl in her arms. She was probably about a year old by now, and surprisingly quiet even in the arms of a stranger. It made her want to cry, knowing the reasons why. Too many nights where crying out would get everyone killed, too many days being screamed at by the one person who was supposed to keep her safe… Sophie rubbed her hand up and down the baby’s back and let her lips brush the top of her head.

Carl watched her movements with an almost longing in his eyes that only Mia caught.

“Your dad…” he suddenly blurted. The twins both looked at him, surprised by the outburst. “Did your- did your mom tell you about him?”

Sophie smiled sadly and shook her head. “Wasn’t much to tell.”

“How do you know?” he probed. “What if there were good stories, but… but your mom just didn’t want you to know about them?”

“I guess we’ll never know for sure.” Sophie swallowed thickly. “But if there were stories? I’d’ve wanted to know them all.”

Carl nodded to himself and reached out to stroke Judith’s hand. She was almost asleep now, soothed by Sophie’s touch. Mia tilted her head and felt her expression soften at the realization of why he’d asked the question.

“You should tell her them,” she told him softly. Carl looked to her in surprise, looking very vulnerable with the bandage covering part of his face. Mia smiled knowingly. “You already are.”

Carl shrugged. “They won’t even… they don’t talk about him.”

“Because he’s dead?” Sophie asked quietly.

“No.” He looked down at his lap. “Because my mom and dad killed him.”

Sophie and Mia looked to each other, suddenly understanding. Carl knew. All of it.

“He loved us,” he mumbled. “It wouldn’t be like this if he didn’t…”

Carl stiffened, then reached out to take Judith from Sophie’s lap. Neither girl liked it.

“You should go.”

He quickly stood up, holding his sister close, before making his way back inside the house without another word. The twins stared after him as the door swung shut, dumbstruck, but the moment they both got to their feet to leave, it all made sense. Lori was making her way down the street towards them.

Mia’s hands curled into tight fists and she took a step forward, only for Sophie to yank on her arm and almost drag her down the steps before Lori noticed them there. She pulled her sister round the side of the house, out of sight, then grabbed her other wrist to turn Mia to face her and pressed their foreheads together.

“No,” she whispered. “No, Mia.”

Sophie was always her rock, her calm. But this time... Mia felt such a molten fury at the sight of Lori walking toward the house that she wanted to launch herself at the woman, rip her throat out with her teeth and let the bitch drown in her own frothy blood.

She wanted to gouge those eyes out and shove them down Rick’s throat as he watched Lori be flayed alive by her blade, peel back layers of skin and rub salt and walker ooze into the wounds. She wanted to do many horrible, bloodthirsty and depraved things to the woman... and Sophie was the only thing making her be still. For the moment.

She was on autopilot, letting Sophie drag her around the back and gently lead her to their sort-of house. Her twin knew if she didn't get Mia out of there soon, she'd lose that shred of control and attack, ruining what they'd worked so hard to achieve.

Sophie glanced out the window towards their tree, where she knew Shane was watching their every move. If Mia lost it, so would he. And then they’d all be fucked.

Once the door was secured and locked, Mia ripped herself from Sophie's gentle hands and started pacing with her hands in her hair and a snarl on her lips.

She was losing it. She felt trapped. Like the walls were closing in and covered in spikes. Like a chain was creeping around her chest and neck, strangling her with its closeness. 

"Mia…"

She didn't respond verbally, but cold glacier met warm emerald and it sent a chill down Sophie's spine. Mia was one more incident away from going full-on postal. 

If that happened? They’d lose the chance she’d discovered on their way back. So she switched tactics, tone turning harder and less emotional. “You missed it, didn’t you?”

“What?” Mia almost spat, frowning. Her confusion made her pacing pause.

“Rick’s house,” Sophie clarified as she moved closer to her sister. “Did you notice anything off?”

“Yeah, that bi-”

“No.” Sophie grabbed Mia’s wrist, right over the bruises Shane had left. “C’mon, _think._ ”

But Mia couldn’t. She tried replaying it but all she could see was red.

“There’s a busted window.” Sophie’s voice was firm, almost a little harsh, and it had Mia’s full attention. “Round the side of the house. By the _wall._ ”

Mia’s breathing hitched as the haze started to clear and she could suddenly _see_. “Entrance point.”

“Yeah.” Sophie nodded. “So calm the fuck down. Right now. You’re lucky I didn’t miss it as well, or we’d both be stuck here another day.”

She hated being hard on her sister like that, but since Shane wasn’t there to do it, she had to step up instead. He could bring her out of anything with his words, with his touch. Firm, tough… but never cruel. He knew exactly what to say to stop Mia spiraling, and she could only hope she’d mimicked him well enough to break through to Mia, to snap her out of that rage.

“You good?” she wanted to know, tone softening despite herself. “Mia.”

The older twin shuddered as her hand moved up to touch the necklace hidden beneath her borrowed clothes. “Fuck, you sound…”

“Uh-huh,” Sophie agreed. “So answer the question. Are you good?”

"Yeah."

Sophie wasn't going to get a better answer. But she could see Mia rub at her wrists, over the bruises, and clasp her hand around the necklace around. 

"Good." Sophie sighed softly and rubbed at her temples, feeling a migraine coming, Due to her pregnancy or her sister, she wasn’t sure. 

Mia sunk onto the couch, unable to enjoy that it was new and plush and soft, just about processing it was something to sit on as she ran hands through her hair. She felt the weight of the world on her shoulders, or maybe it was the hands of Hell pulling her down. Both felt accurate. 

She'd seen the baby now. Up close and mere feet from her. God, it was torture, seeing those dark eyes. The mirror image of the ones she desperately wanted to be seeing right then. They needed to get Judith out of there. And Carl... God help her. Mia wanted to wrap that boy in her arms and hold him.

He was so starved for love he wasn’t even trying for it anymore, hitting that point where he'd just given up. Given in. Fuck, she wanted to…

"We have to take Carl, too..." Mia twisted her head to look at Sophie, her eyes melting from ice into flowing waters. 

"What?"

“We can’t leave him,” she insisted, voice cracking a little. “Not with her. We have to rescue him, too.”

Sophie stared at her. Eyes wide. Then, her head started to twist slightly from side to side. Slow. Disbelieving. “Mia...”

“She’s a monster!” Mia cried. “She’s killing him! Both of them! We can’t just-”

“Mia!” Sophie snapped, expression hardening. “Stop!”

“What?” Mia spat. Her rage was threatening to take over again. “Those _maternal instincts_ only kick in when its _your_ kid involved, suddenly?”

Sophie recoiled like she’d been slapped, but Mia didn’t have it in her to feel bad. She couldn’t believe her sister was actually fucking arguing with her over something like this. It was a no-brainer.

She dug her nails in a little deeper. “C’mon, _Soph_ , where’s that bleeding heart gone, huh?”

“It’s right here. Where it’s always been,” Sophie responded darkly. She knew Mia was just using her as a scapegoat. Better her than one of the Alexandrians. But that didn’t mean the words didn’t sting. That the accusations didn’t wound. It was hard not to lash out right back. “But this is not our call to make.”

_“Not our call?!”_ Mia felt like a livewire, sparking everywhere. Nobody had saved them from their mother. Nobody cared about them. About her. But she wasn’t going to let that happen to Carl. “Whose call is it then? Huh?”

Sophie’s reply was sharp. To the point. “Shane’s.”

“That didn’t matter when we were planning _this!_ ” Mia argued. “You didn’t let him make _these_ calls! _We_ had to! So I’m making another. We’re not taking the baby and leaving the kid!”

Sophie gritted her teeth and rubbed at her throbbing temples, trying to remain calm before she spoke again. “We are too close to this. You’re being impulsive, not thinking it through.”

“And you’re being a heartless bitch!”

A deathly silence fell between the two of them, then.

Twin on twin. Blue versus green. Emotion against logic.

Until Sophie spoke. Calm but lethal.

“Have you forgotten that we are _stealing_ a baby? She hasn’t asked us to take her. We’re just _doing_ it.” Her eyes were flat. Unreadable. “But Carl is _thirteen._ Taking him without him wanting us to goes from saving to abduction, and we are not crossing that line. Not until Shane has had his say.”

“He’ll want us to,” Mia protested, but the indignant strength she’d shown before had lessened along with her rage. “He _loves_ Carl.”

“Exactly,” Sophie agreed. “So if Carl wants to stay here? He might let him. It’s not up to us to assume and make that decision for him.”

“But-”

Sophie held up her hand. “I’m gonna get some air. You do whatever you gotta do to calm the fuck down, but you’re not leaving this house until tomorrow morning. We’re done, here.”

With that, she crossed the room and yanked open the door, stepping outside into the cool early evening air to lean her forearms against the porch railing and _breathe._ This place was toxic for them. Too foreign, yet memory-inducing. Too nice, yet harsh and cold. Too surrounded, yet completely alone. She hated how it had warped them both into something fractured and jagged.

She glanced up towards their tree. Towards Shane.

She couldn’t see him, but she knew she was there.

Tap. Tap tap tap. Tap tap. Tap tap tap.

She moved two of her fingers against the top of her wrist, where a watch would be if she had one. Deliberate yet casual.

Quick slow quick. Quick slow quick. Tap tap tap. Quick slow slow.

T O M O R R O W

Quick slow. Tap tap.

A M

She was getting them out. Before it broke them completely.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are love
> 
> Comments are life


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